Pirate Radio/The Boat That Rocked (2009)
Directed by Richard Curtis
Written by Richard Curtis
Starring Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy, Kenneth Branagh, Rhys Ifans, Nick Frost, Emma Thompson
Release Date April 1st, 2009
Published November 12th, 2009
Oh how sad, a good premise gone bad. Pirate Radio has a sensational premise. Set in 1966 it tells the story of a Rock N' Roll radio station moored off the shores London. Why is the radio station on a ship in the Atlantic? Because 1966 was the year that rock music was banned in the UK. Brilliant subversives took the cause of rock n roll to the sea and broadcast rock, soul and pop tunes to millions.
If you think the premise is good, how about the fact that Pirate Radio is written and directed by Richard Curtis, the brilliant mind behind Four Weddings and A Funeral and Love Actually, with a cast that includes Oscar winner Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy, Kenneth Branagh, January Jones and Emma Thompson. How could this have gone so very, very wrong?
Pirate Radio tells the story of some heroic music lovers. Quentin (Bill Nighy) is the fun loving; sea-faring owner of Rock Radio, the most listened to pirate radio station on the high seas. His ratings are high thanks to an American DJ known as The Count (Phillip Seymour Hoffman) and a collection of oddball jocks including failed comic Angus (Rhys Darby), shy morning guy Simon (Chris O'Dowd) and ladies man Dave (Nick Frost).
Together they roll the high seas rocking, drinking and engaging in general debauchery. Or so we are told, one of the failings of Pirate Radio is how often the film leaves the best stuff off screen. This is supposed to be a movie about rock radio in the 60’s. Girls, drugs, booze, sex. And yet, we rarely see any of it. It's one thing to imply wild, rock n'roll good times but Pirate Radio can't even imply good times well enough.
Into this allegedly wild environment young Carl (Tom Sturridge) arrives. Kicked out of school for some reason, Carl's mom (Emma Thompson) sends him to stay with Quentin who may or may not be his father. What Carl or his new roommate, known to everyone on the boat as Thick Kevin (Tom Brooke) , do in exchange for staying on the boat is anyone’s guess.
Then again, motivation for any of these characters is lacking throughout Pirate Radio. So truncated is the character development in Pirate Radio that scenes arrive, exist and disappear seemingly at random. One moment a character is on the radio and in the next he's sitting around with the other DJ's laughing and drinking and while it's all congenial, even occasionally funny, there isn't much of anything going on.
Tension is supposed to build with the arrival of a new DJ named Gavin (Rhys Ifans) but again we aren't sure why. Yes, he's cocky and dismissive but we know too little about him or the people he rubs the wrong way to care why anyone is so terribly upset. Gavin is initiated in a bizarre contest with the Count that wastes a good 10 minutes of screen time.
Kenneth Branagh, playing the necessary villain as the officious government prat Sir Allistair Dormandy, is the only actor to discover his character's purpose. Though his proper British stiff is well lampooned he too lacks nuance beyond repeatedly defining himself as a jerk. At least he has a definition. Branagh's put upon assistant Mr. Twatt, yes you read that right, is a one note joke that gets less funny each time it is uttered.
There may be a behind the scenes reason for the complete failure of Pirate Radio. The film was released 8 months ago in England; then called The Boat That Rocked. The film was 20 or so minutes longer and allegedly had a lot more character stuff. Maybe, just maybe, there is something in there to explain the actions of these characters and give them depth beyond the caricatures. Then again, as it is Pirate Radio feels over long; making the film longer has rarely improved any movie.
Then again, there is a rumor that the original didn't have this version's prolonged, shipwreck of an ending, or at least didn't linger on it as much as this version does. That could definitely be an improvement. No matter what the first version of Pirate Radio/The Boat that Rocked looked like this version stinks out loud.
