Swimfam (2002)
Directed by John Polson
Written by Charles Bohl
Starring Jesse Bradford, Erika Christensen, Shiri Appleby, Kate Burton, Dan Hedaya
Release Date September 6th, 2002
Published September 6th, 2002
It's been years since I have seen Michael Douglas and Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. The little that I remember about Fatal Attraction centers on that boiled rabbit scene and how freaky Glenn Close's hair looked. I don't remember liking the film very much except on a camp level. So, yeah, remaking Fatal Attraction with teenagers and a swimming pool? Not really something I was looking for. Swimfan is just that, a cheesy, sleazy, teenage version of Fatal Attraction, the only difference being that at least the original had some camp value.
Jesse Bradford, star of Clockwatchers, stars as Ben Cronin and as the title suggests, he is indeed a swimmer. In fact Ben is a champion swimmer with a bright future. Ben is in love with a waifish angel named Amy, played by Roswell's Shiri Appleby. Soon, everything comes crashing down as Ben meets psycho bitch Madison Bell (Erika Christensen).
At first she seems normal enough, don't they always, but she begins to get more involved with Ben. Not surprisingly Madison seduces the dumb jock and thus begins a series of below average thriller movie scenes, where Madison menaces Ben's mother and girlfriend, tries to frame Ben for the murder of a fellow swimmer, and gets him kicked off the swim team. Not quite boiling a bunny rabbit
As for the rest of the movie there isn't one frame of film in this movie that you haven't seen before. Especially trite is that old thriller trick of the psycho's previous victim. Every time, there is always a first victim who tips off our hero to the psycho's plan. It's truly as if there is some thriller handbook floating around that all hack directors work from when making a psycho-girl movie.
The ending of Swimfan carries the film into comic parody territory. Here, a scene from earlier in the film pays off in the most laughable and predictable fashion. It's like clockwork, you could set your watch to the hack clichés that director John Polson employs to tell the story of Swimfan. If there is a single original thought in all of the making and presentation of Swimfan, I was unable to find it.
Poor Jesse Bradford, at least he doesn't completely embarrass himself with this performance. Bradford's only embarrassment is actually choosing this role. Co-stars Erika Christenson and Shiri Appleby on the other, each are directed to make fools of themselves in their stock stupid roles. Appleby is beyond annoying as the whiney victim girlfriend. As for Christenson her deadpan psycho is never interesting, she never grabs your attention.
A good psycho role should embrace camp, go over the top, really bite down on the role. The performance should seduce the audience and the victims. He or she should be entertaining and over the top, be crazy and enjoy it. Christensen comes off as bored and while I understand that this kind of script and role invites boredom, she should at least be considerate of those of us in the audience for Swimfan and not let the boredom come into her performance.
