Showing posts with label Leslie Nielsen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Leslie Nielsen. Show all posts

Classic Movie Review Surf Ninjas

Surf Ninjas (1993) 

Directed by Neal Israel 

Written by Dan Gordon, Neal Israel 

Starring Ernie Reyes Jr, Ernie Reyes Sr, Leslie Nielsen, Rob Schneider 

Release Date August 20th, 1993 

Published August 29th, 2023 

With apologies to Ernie Reyes, Jr and Sr, Surf Ninjas is a truly terrible movie. This incomprehensible mess of a kids movie posits a world where orphan brothers are protected by a homeless drifter who may or may not be their father and who stealthily dispatches of ninjas looking to kill his children. The kids are unaware of the constant peril they live in and they don't seem to have any questions about their lives, their back story, or the father that abandoned them. They just want to surf bro. Reality however, comes crashing through the walls when Ninjas attack and daddy is forced to reveal himself. 

I genuinely don't know what else you need to know about Surf Ninjas. The plot is rudimentary, the shooting style is amateurish and the performances are devoid of interest. For reasons that defy logic and the ability to suspend disbelief, the brothers go to school with their pal, Iggy, played by Rob Schneider. Is it supposed to be funny that Schneider is 30 years old while playing a character described as a Junior in High School? It's not funny but I also don't know why this choice was made at all. I get that in 1993 Schneider was vaguely appealing as a cast member on Saturday Night Live but why not have him play his age instead of defying credulity as a supposed teenager. 

Naturally, Schneider cannot wait 10 minutes before committing a minor hate crime. As the kids fall under the attack from Ninjas in the employ of Colonel Chi, a hate crime committed by Leslie Nielsen, Schneider breaks out the racist accents and tells a ninja that he 'no speaky the English.' It's hard to even write that line and yet Schneider says it as if it's just totally normal. This was only Schneider's third feature film role but he was setting the tone for the cinematic hate crimes he would continue to commit for the next 30 years of devolving as a human being, and as a comedian and actor. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 



Movie Review Scary Movie 3

Scary Movie 3 (2003) 

Directed by David Zucker 

Written by Craig Mazin, Pat Proft 

Starring Anna Faris, Anthony Anderson, Kevin Hart, Leslie Nielsen, Simon Rex, Eddie Griffin 

Release Date October 24th, 2003 

Published October 23rd, 2003 

Scream was a film that changed the rules of modern horror forever by turning its conventions in on itself. Scary Movie had a timely “of the moment” quality even if the idea of parodying a film that was a parody in some respects itself was a little out there. Scary Movie succeeded, piling satire on top of pop culture scatology and earned its place amongst the best of modern madcap comedies. The sequel however could not match the energy of the original and most importantly its humor.

Now with a third sequel, Scary Movie has come to mirror the trilogy that inspired it. Scream 3 had none of the originality and creative energy of the first Scream and Scary Movie 3 is merely a pale imitation of its progenitor. The Zucker Brothers, the team behind the Airplane and Naked Gun films, take the creative reins from the Wayans Brothers. Even so, Scary Movie 3 is a limp parody of recent blockbusters ranging from The Matrix to The Others to M. Night Shyamalan's Signs and Eminem's 8 Mile. The modest 2002 horror hit The Ring provides the basis for much of the film’s satire.

Anna Faris returns as the series heroine Cindy Campbell, now working as a reporter ala Naomi Watts' character in The Ring. Cindy stumbles on two big news stories that may be connected, a videotape that promises death and crop circles in a small-town cornfield owned by Tom (Charlie Sheen in a parody of Mel Gibson's fallen priest in Signs). Simon Rex is George, Tom's younger brother and wannabe rapper a la Eminem in8 Mile. George is also Cindy's love interest in the film

None of the plot matters, of course, it's merely a jumping off point for movie parodies that reminded me of Weird Al Yankovic's song parodies. The film takes the plot of Signs or The Ring, recreates the scenes and simply changes the dialogue from melodrama to comedy. It's the same formula that worked so well in the original Scary Movie. However, the original smartly kept its focus on parodying one film at a time, Scary Movie 3 attempts to parody several different films all at once, at times more than one film in the same scene. The lack of focus forces the script to do a lot of explaining and re-explaining of what is being parodied. All of the exposition necessary to give context to the next gag is tiresome to say the least.

The film’s trailer is somewhat misleading. The trailer promises a Matrix parody with Queen Latifah and Eddie Griffin. In reality there is a bit of Matrix parody but Latifah and Griffin have more screen time in the trailer than in the actual film. I won't spoil the surprise of what actor plays the role of the Architect in another Matrix riff but it's one of the film’s few bright spots.

The film’s weak spots are numerous but especially glaring are its weak attempts at racial humor. The scenes that parody 8 Mile are completely off the mark and Simon Rex is especially overmatched attempting to send up Eminem who's verbal virtuosity is ten times funnier than any of the weak satire of Scary Movie 3. 

How do you send-up a character who himself is a brilliant parodist? You have to be able to top him and the Zucker Brothers never come close to any satire that Eminem hasn't already done himself and funnier. The Zucker's clearly lack the Wayans's sharp eye for racial humor. While watching the 8 Mile send-ups, you’re left to wonder how the Wayans Boys would have handled the same material and you know it would be far funnier.

The only thing Scary Movie 3 has going for it is Anna Faris who once again shows an astounding comedic ability to rise above even the most revolting indignities. Her Cindy Campbell has been beaten to heck in each of the three films and still Faris manages to shine. Faris takes on all of the lowest forms of humor with chipper aplomb and winks at the audience the whole way. She is the only element of Scary Movie 3 that works.

The Zucker Brothers with writing partner Jim Abrahams invented the parody genre. With Scary Movie 3 they may have effectively ended it from a creative standpoint. It's clear they have lost their deftness and comic touch in favor of half-assed, inane scatology. From a commercial standpoint unfortunately, the genre will likely have another life, it is clear this film will be a hit despite its innumerable flaws.

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