Classic Movie Review Can't Buy Me Love

Can't Buy Me Love (1987) 

Directed by Steve Rash 

Written by Michael Swerdlick

Starring Amanda Peterson, Patrick Dempsey, Courtney Gains, Dennis Dugan 

Release Date August 14th, 1987

Can’t Buy Me Love is bankrupt at its core. The 1987 teen comedy starring Patrick Dempsey and the late Amanda Peterson has the trappings of a sweet 80s teen comedy about nerds and popular kids but lacks something in its heart. There is a cynicism at the center of Can’t Buy Me Love that the makers attempt to paper over by rushing to a climax that never feels right or especially earned.

Ronald Miller is our typical high school movie geek, stringy, shy, poorly dressed and into science. His crush is the most popular girl in school, Cindy, a cheerleader with a boyfriend who is now in college and is neglecting her affection. While Ronald pines from the seat of his lawnmower (he mows her lawn to the point he’s saved up $1000 while seeming to have only ever mowed Cindy’s lawn), Cindy is putting on a brave face about her absent boyfriend.

The plot kicks in when Cindy borrows an expensive outfit from her mother’s closet and ruins it. She desperately needs $1000 to replace the outfit and through plot contrivance, Ronald and his cold hard cash happen to be at the same mall attempting to buy a telescope, another 80s nerd signifier. Ronald offers his cash for Cindy to buy and replace her mom’s outfit in exchange for Cindy to go out with him and help him break into the cool clique at school.

The plan works as Cindy’s popularity rubs off on Ronald almost immediately. The two even begin to confide in one another and get close until Ronald misses his cue to kiss her for real and the two end up in a staged break up where Ronald compounds his blunders with cruel words he thinks are part of the act. Cindy is hurt and Ronald gets what he wants but not without a warning from her that being popular is harder than it looks. That’s what the makers of Can’t Buy Me Love don’t understand; while it goes through the motions of a lame redemption story for Ronald, the real story and the heart of the story belongs to Cindy whose struggle to maintain an image of perfection is harming her very soul.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Detroit

Detroit (2017) 

Directed by Kathryn Bigelow

Written by Mark Boal

Starring John Boyega, Will Poulter, Algee Smith, Jacob Lattimore, Kaitlyn Dever

Release Date July 28th, 2017 

Recently I listened to Malcolm Gladwell’s incredible podcast Revisionist History and in the very first episode he discussed a fascinating sociological concept called Moral Licensing. Moral Licensing is in essence doing something that is right and then using that right action, essentially a good deed, to justify bad behavior. Gladwell’s example was a painter in 19th Century England, Elizabeth Thompson, whose painting, titled Roll Call, became the first by a female artist to take a respected placement in the Royal Academy of Art. Unfortunately, the good deed by the male dominated Royal Academy of featuring the remarkable painting gave them, in their minds, the bona fides to justify not electing Thompson to become a member of the Royal Academy. They’d done their good deed and had nothing, in their minds left to prove.

I thought a great deal about Moral Licensing as I watched Kathryn Bigelow’s remarkable new film Detroit. This story about the riots that raged in Detroit, Michigan in 1967 and more specifically about an incident of police brutality that resulted in the deaths of three innocent black men, at the Algiers Hotel, led me to wonder if just becoming a police officer—a peace officer, someone whose job in the world is to protect people—gives some lesser officers the notion that they have moral license to do as they please. They’ve proven their bona fides as a good person by offering to protect the innocent, thus how they do their jobs is justified by virtue of having accepted the position.

I am not generalizing here; I respect police officers and the remarkable difficulty of their job. Scientifically and psychologically, however, there is a kernel of truth here. It could happen to anyone in such a position: a doctor, a politician, even a film critic who uses his position as a writer to espouse a point of view and then, if his point of view is well-viewed, he or she can take license to go further and espouse further and potentially do harm because they feel they have a moral high ground that doesn’t really exist.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Classic Movie Review Stakeout

Stakeout (1987) 

Directed by John Badham 

Written by Jim Kouf

Starring Richard Dreyfuss, Emilio Estevez, Aiden Quinn, Madeleine Stowe 

Release Date August August 5th, 1987 

Stakeout exists in a bizarre space in our popular memory. The action-comedy starring Richard Dreyfuss and Emilio Estevez opened the first weekend of August, 1987 at the top of the box office. The film went on to rank in the top 10 highest grossing films of the year and earned mostly positive reviews from critics. Then, it simply faded from memory. Sure, 6 years after the release of Stakeout they got around to making a bad sequel, shoulder shruggingly titled Another Stakeout, that did the original film no favors, but why did this successful movie mostly disappear from popular memory?

Dreyfuss and Estevez play Chris and Bill, Seattle Police detectives who are tasked with what they think is a punishment gig. After screwing up a bust, they get put on stakeout duty, watching the ex-girlfriend of an escaped convict in case he might come visiting. Aiden Quinn is the convict, nicknamed Stick, while Madeleine Stowe plays the ex-girlfriend who also becomes Chris’s love interest, something that is highly fraught as Chris must pretend he’s not a police officer to not blow his and Bill’s cover.

Dreyfuss and Stowe have a terrific chemistry, despite Stowe’s bizarre Spanish-Irish combo accent and Dreyfuss’s remarkable creepiness in watching her undress when he first goes on stakeout duty and then breaks into her home and ends up watching her shower. Despite how much I enjoy Richard Dreyfuss, there is no escaping how pervy and unfunny these scenes are. The sexual dynamic of Stakeout has not aged well and likely plays into why the film is so well forgotten.

The dynamic between Dreyfuss and Estevez is equally as charming as the dynamic between Stowe and Dreyfuss. Estevez was a mere 25 years old in Stakeout but with the aid of a remarkable mustache, he ages up just enough to be convincing as a detective. I loved the playful interplay between Estevez and Dreyfuss which is far less broad than your typical 80s action-comedy and feels more realistic and genuine than similar cop comedies; the two seem like genuine friends and partners instead of the more popular mismatched partners of so many similar films.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Classic Movie Review Swing Kids

Swing Kids (1993) 

Directed by Thomas Carter

Written by Jonathan Marc Feldman 

Starring Christian Bale, Robert Sean Leonard, Frank Whaley, Barbara Hershey 

Release Date March 5th, 1993 

Published June 21st, 1993 

Swing Kids is an obnoxious movie about obnoxious characters being obnoxious amid the rising tensions and hatred of pre-World War 2 Germany. The story follows a group of young men, led by best friends, Peter (Leonard) and Thomas (Bale). All these boys want to do is dance, listen to records, and meet girls but their idyllic dance-floor utopia is interrupted by the rise of the Third Reich. The demand for conformity and discipline eventually takes hold of Thomas, who becomes a member of the Hitler Youth, straining not only his friendship to Peter but his loyalty to their bohemian, dancing music loving circle. 

It's not a bad premise for a movie but as executed by Thomas Carter, it captures mostly the obnoxious side of being a wild-eyed, horny teenager and the way those who may not have strong family lives, are more susceptible to seemingly charismatic cult leaders. Thomas falls in with the Hitler Youth because he is distant from his rich father, he craves the chance to belong to something, and he's in conflict with everyone else in his life, including Peter who refuses to fall in line with the S.S, and wants Thomas to remember that a member of their friend group, Arvid (Frank Whaley), is Jewish and thus very vulnerable at this point in time. 

Whaley delivers the most interesting and compelling performance in Swing Kids as a Jazz loving, Jazz guitarist who refuses to compromise his Jewish background or his dedicated bohemian, communist morals. Though he is often framed by the film as being unreasonable in how he appears perfectly willing to die in order to defy the Nazis, Whaley gives the performance depth and weight beyond the box that the script and the direction place him in. Whaley's is a performance of deep conviction and sincerity, a counterpoint to Leonard's wishy-washy, non-committal approach and Bale's obnoxious embrace of all things Nazi. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media

Movie Review Enys Men

Enys Men (2023) 

Directed by Mark Jenkin

Written by Mark Jenkin 

Starring Mary Woodvine, Edward Rowe 

Release Date January 13th, 2023 

Published June 21st, 2023 

Enys Men, pronounced, N-is Main, is Cornish for Stone Island. That's the setting for the story unfolding patiently and disquietingly in Mark Jenkin's unsettling atmospheric drama. Mary Woodvine stars as a character only known as 'The Volunteer.' The Volunteer has taken on the job of chronicling the unexpected growth of new plant life on Enys Men, a place that hasn't seen new growth in some time. Each day, The Volunteer treks forth from her cottage to an oceanside cliff where she monitors the temperature surrounding the growth of this plant life. 

She then treks back home to document the minute, often unchanging data. This goes on day after day after day, without a deviation from her pattern. It's a pattern that also includes a stop at an ancient well where she tests the height of the water by dropping a rock and tracking the seconds it takes to make contact with the bottom of the well. This too is unchanging until one day, it changes. Even this doesn't seem to shake The Volunteer from her routine. She makes note of it and goes on with her assignment. Occasionally, The Volunteer will share an awkward and rushed C.B conversation with a long time friend. Beyond that, The Volunteer appears to be alone. Until she isn't. 

The disquieting nature of the narrative begins to truly take hold as The Volunteer begins hearing things on the roof of her cottage. It's a little girl, her own little girl, it would seem. Is this child here with her? There has been no evidence until this point that The Volunteer wasn't alone. The strange nature of the child first appearing on top of the cabin and then being a sort of ghostly presence inside the cabin, one that is only mildly commented upon, lends a further air of discomfort to what is unfolding. The Volunteer barely bats an eye over the sudden appearance of her apparent child. It's as if she's not at all surprised. 

Find my full length review at Horror.Media 

Classic Movie Review Army of Darkness

Army of Darkness (1993) 

Directed by Sam Raimi 

Written by Sam Raimi, Ivan Raimi 

Starring Bruce Campbell, Embeth Davidtz 

Release Date February 19th, 1993 

Published June 20th, 2023 

Army of Darkness is a direct sequel to Evil Dead 2 but, in the tradition of Evil Dead 1, continuity between the two is not necessary. The basic elements are enough to marry one film to the other. Ash (Bruce Campbell), survived a fight against the Deadites, zombie demons from another dimension, only to find himself sucked into another dimension. In this dimension there are Kings and servants, warring clans, and an ancient evil that Ash happens to have some experience in defeating. After demonstrating god-like powers in surviving against a Deadite at the bottom of a well, Ash is welcomed into this bizarre world. 

In classically Ash fashion, he immediately flirts with and gets the girl, Sheila (Davidtz), who is then subsequently stolen away and corrupted by the Deadites. In order to free this cursed land from the evil of the Deadites, Ash must go on a quest to retrieve the Book of the Dead, the very book that got him into this mess in Evil Dead and Evil Dead 2. The book was sucked through this dimensional portal along with Ash and has now fallen into the hands of the Deadites who've placed it in a cursed cemetery. The Arthurian touches in Army of Darkness are inspired gags. 

The key to Army of Darkness however, is a spirit of anarchic invention. Director Sam Raimi and his star, Bruce Campbell show off a childlike glee as they workout different bits and gags they can do with the larger budget and platform they were given following the modest but notable success of Evil Dead 2. If you ask Raimi, he would say that he didn't need the budget that was given to him but he also then felt obligated to spend it since he had it. With that, we get both improved special effects and the kinds of practical effects that Raimi developed a remarkable talent for in the Evil Dead movies. 

The combinations of Harryhausen inspired practicality, music, and slightly more expensive effects, are used to create a low budget atmosphere on a relatively large budget. Raimi's homemade aesthetic somehow survives the move to a big studio feature and there is a wonderful charm to how Army of Darkness combines big effects with the kind of inventive, chaotic, weirdness that drove Raimi in his early career as a filmmaker. The delight Raimi and his collaborators take in creating comic gore, and paying tribute to low budget effects movies of the past is wonderfully infectious. 

Bruce Campbell however, is perhaps the best special effect in the movie. Campbell's ability for physical comedy, his willingness to put his body on the line for a gag, and his more than willingness to be silly, is an incredible asset to the charm of Army of Darkness. His Ash may talk like a cross between the tough guy banter of Bogart and the suave charm of Errol Flynn, but Campbell has a comic quality that neither of those legendary performers has. It's a sly ability to ride the razors edge between silly camp and action movie star that is a one of a kind combination. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Classic Movie Review Last Action Hero

Last Action Hero (1993) 

Directed by John McTiernan 

Written by Shane Black, David Arnott 

Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dylan O'Brien, Charles Dance, Anthony Quinn, Mercedes Ruehl, Tom Noonan 

Release Date June 18th, 1993  

Published June 19th 2023 

In the history of Hollywood debacles, Last Action Hero has quite a reputation. With massive budget overruns and egotistical executives pushing for an extremely misguided schedule and release date, Last Action Hero was a doomed production. Having began life as a parody of Arnold Schwarzenegger style action movies, the film had to be radically retrofitted when Schwarzenegger chose to star in the film. No longer could the star be the subject of the jokes, he was now the one making the jokes. With Schwarzenegger aboard, the original screenwriters were booted in favor of Shane Black and David Arnott who were tasked with solving a tricky tone of meta-humor and action movie tropes. 

That a movie vaguely watchable came out of the mishmash or rewrites and revisions, that included something like 7 writers, including rewrites by William Goldman and Carrie Fisher, on top of the original duo of Zak Penn and Adam Leff. Both the director and star each offered insight on the script and well, you know what they say about Too Many Cooks? Yeah, way too many cooks took their turn in trying to boil up a workable version of Last Action Hero and the result is a bland, tasteless, pile of gruel, a little salty thanks to Schwarzenegger's star power, but mostly a forgettable and moderately distasteful meal. 

The concept is really the only thing anyone seemed to like about Last Action Hero. In the plot, a 12 year old boy named Danny Madigan (Austin O'Brien), receives a magical movie ticket as a gift from his friend, Nick the Projectionist (Robert Prosky), who has gifted Danny a preview showing of the new Jack Slater movie, Jack Slater 5. Jack Slater (Arnold Schwarzenegger), is an action movie hero in an action movie universe where he's an indestructible action machine who kills bad guys and cuts mad quips at their expense, all while rock music plays on a loop. 

It's everything an adrenalin fueled 12 year old could want, bullets, babes, bad guys, and our hero always wins in the end. This Jack Slater adventure however, is going to be a little different. Thanks to Danny's magic ticket, Danny is transported inside the movie. After dynamite seemingly blows up the movie theater, Danny wakes up in the back of Jack Slater's car, mid-car chase and shootout. Slater is as surprised as Danny to find a young boy in his back set, but that doesn't stop him from finishing off the bad guys and finishing the action scene. 

From there we explore the world of Jack Slater with Danny as our audience surrogate. All the while, Danny tries to convince Jack that they are in a movie in a series of jokes that diminish in comic returns each time. When Danny starts telling Jack that he saw the bad guys set up Jack's favorite second cousin Frank (Art Carney), Jack starts to take Danny seriously, a little bit. Things ramp up when the baddies realize Danny is on to them and the evil Mr. Benedict comes into possession of Danny's magic movie ticket and takes the chance to escape into the real world. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media