Movie Review Something Borrowed

Something Borrowed (2011) 

Directed by Luke Greenfield 

Written by Jennie Snyder Urman

Starring Ginnifer Goodwin, Kate Hudson, John Krasinski, Colin Egglesfield

Release Date May 6th, 2011 

Published May 6th, 2011

Ginnifer Goodwin stars in the new romantic comedy "Something Borrowed" as Rachel, a mousy gal who has long been bossed around by her best friend from childhood, Darcy (Kate Hudson). Despite being best friends Darcy unknowingly stole the love of Rachel's life Dex (Colin Egglesfield) and is going to marry him soon.

Cheaters

The marriage plans hit a bit of a speed bump when everyone has a little too much to drink and Rachel and Dex end up sleeping together. While they at first agree to keep things quiet, Dex eventually tells Rachel that he's in love with her while Rachel confesses the affair to her other best friend Ethan (John Krasinski.)

Weekends in the Hamptons

As all of this drama is happening oblivious Darcy invites everyone for weekend's in the Hamptons throughout the summer where Rachel is treated to listening to the soon to married couple have sex while she fights off the advances of Dex's skeevy cousin Marcus (Steve Howey). Will Dex tell Darcy he wants to leave her? Will Rachel tell her? Will Ethan tell her? Do you really care?

Secret revealed

By the time the secret was revealed in "Something Borrowed" I certainly didn't care. Director Luke Greenfield and writer Jennie Snyder's ingenious plan for trying to make us not hate Rachel for sleeping with her best friend's fiance is to make D'arcy so unbelievably self centered and obnoxious that we won't mind so much that she gets hurt.

Impossible to endure

The writing and direction however, only serve to make Ms. Hudson's performance almost impossible to endure and relieves the movie of anything emotional at stake. Darcy is so amazingly awful that we really don't mind so much when the two closest people in her life conspire against her. Who thought that was a good premise for a movie?

Prolonged agony

John Krasinski is the only modestly entertaining character in "Something Borrowed;" an island of reason and humor in a movie mostly devoid of both. Unfortunately, Krasinsky gets played off early in the final act and we are left with the three awful characters who prolong our agony for several long and irritating scenes.

"Something Borrowed" is one of the worst movies of 2011.

Movie Review The Girl Next Door

The Girl Next Door (2004) 

Directed by Luke Greenfield

Written by Luke Greenfield, Stuart Bloomberg, 3 Other Screenwriters

Starring Emile Hirsch, Elisha Cuthbert, Timothy Olyphant, James Remar, Paul Dano 

Release Date April 9th, 2004 

Published April 10th, 2004

When do you think Hollywood ran out of original ideas? It's been awhile I know that, but I never imagined just how bad things were until I saw the latest commercial campaign for the teen sex comedy The Girl Next Door. The ad campaign actually touts the film’s lack of an original idea, calling the film American Pie meets Risky Business. This isn't the first unoriginal idea but it's the rare example of a film that doesn't try to hide it in some way. The Girl Next Door comes right out and admits that it has not one original idea and watching the film reinforces just that.

Emile Hirsch stars as Matthew. He’s class president, valedictorian and on his way to law school at Georgetown University. That is until he meets the titular girl next door, Danielle (Elisha Cuthbert). The two kids meet cute as Matthew spies on Danielle from his bedroom window. She catches him and turns the tables on him, taking him out for some public humiliation, the funniest moment in the film.

From there begins a rather dull movie courtship where the straight-laced Matthew comes out of his shell with the help of the wild child Danielle. Like every romantic comedy, there is a roadblock and this one is a doozy. It seems that in a previous life, Danielle was a pornstar and her past is catching up with her in the form of her former director Kelly (Timothy Olyphant). Kelly wants her back in front of the camera and will do anything to get her back. It's up to Matthew and a pair of his high school buddies to help her find a way out.

I will give the ad campaign of the film a little credit, it doesn't lie. The film does indeed lift liberally from both American Pie and Risky Business. In fact, Risky's writer-director Paul Brickman should be seeking a writing credit and some compensation for the direct rip-offs employed by director Luke Greenfield and writers David Wagner and Brent Goldberg. Simply switch the film’s porno storyline with Risky's hooker storyline and you have nearly the same film. 

Whereas Tom Cruise's character becomes a pimp in order to pay off Rebecca Demornay's debt to Joe Pantoliano, Emile Hirsch's Matthew directs a porn film with the help of Danielle's porn star friends to pay off her debt to Timothy Olyphant’s Kelly. Where Cruise and Demornay have sex on the subway, Hirsch and Cuthbert have sex in a limousine. And on and on.

There was one good thing about Girl Next Door and that was the lovely Elisha Cuthbert who, despite a weak script that does her few favors, manages to shine with a sweet and sexy performance. Cuthbert helps Hirsch's rather weak performance when they are on screen together, but when it's just Hirsch, the star of the terrific indie film The Secret Lives Of Altar Boys, he and the film struggle mightily. Hirsch may have a bright future ahead of him but he needs to choose his scripts better. More Alter Boys style stuff and no more teen sex comedies.

The Girl Next Door is yet another example of cynical Hollywood filmmaking that puts demographics ahead of actual filmmaking. This is a film that was approved in the pitch meeting by executives who didn't care if there was a good script as long as they had the right amount of T&A; to parade in front of the camera and enough familiar elements to lull audiences into mindless nostalgia. I can't register honest surprise about this film but I can lament it and decry it.