Classic Movie Review The Hand

The Hand (1981)

Directed by Oliver Stone

Written by Oliver Stone

Starring Michael Caine, Bruce McGill

Release Date April 24th, 1981 

Published August 2nd, 2023 

The Hand is a truly bizarre idea. Writer-Director Oliver Stone, directing only his second feature, sets out to have us be genuinely afraid that a severed hand might be killing people. Forgetting the fact that watching people wrestle with a severed hand that they are holding to their throat is a very, very funny visual, Stone is deathly serious in how he presents The Hand. Eschewing the 60s B-Movie, Drive-In aesthetic more suited to this idea, Stone seems to think that he can convince us that a severed hand is a frightening monster on par with the greats of MGM's murderer's row. 

Stone is undermined in his effort by his choice of star. Michael Caine may be an all time beloved actor but when he's in a bad movie, he gets into the bad vibe. Caine has famously said of The Hand that the film helped put a new garage on his home. That about sums up Caine's level of commitment to this silly, silly movie that only the writer-director seems to think is genuinely scary. Caine hams it up in the role of cartoonist, Jon Lansdale. 

The contempt with which Caine discusses his character's profession is unintentionally hilarious. The idea is that he's become wildly successful and famous for writing a manly superhero character. But when Caine tries to defend the integrity of his creation, his art, he sounds as if he were mocking the very concept of comic strips all together. There is simply nothing about the actor Michael Caine that screams comic strip auteur. It's easy to sense that Caine simply doesn't care about this back story, it's what he's been asked to deliver and he's doing it. 

The plot of The Hand centers on an accident in which our cartoonist protagonist loses his hand. The hand is cut clean off and then simply vanishes from the field where it most certainly had landed. The hand then begins a reign of terror that begins with menacing the family cat and graduates to a legit body count. The question hovering over all of the action of The Hand however is: Is the hand killing people or is it all in Jon Lansdale's mind? 

Find my full length review at Horror.Media 

Movie Review Obsessed

Obsessed (2009) 

Directed by Steve Shill

Written by David Loughery 

Starring Beyonce, Idris Elba, Ali Larter, Bruce McGill, Jerry O'Connell 

Release Date April 23rd, 2009 

Published April 22nd, 2009 

The thriller Obsessed wants to be, needs to be a trashtastic spectacle. Instead what we get is a timid, messy, goofball effort that fails to deliver on the promise of its guilty pleasure premise. The commercials sold Beyonce vs that chick from Heroes that isn't Hayden Pannetiere. We want the catfight, we get a minor kitten tangle.

Idris Elba, who may be best known for his work on HBO's little seen but much loved drama The Wire, stars in Obsessed as Derek, a happily married executive trying to put his womanizing ways in the past. You see, his wife Sharon (Beyonce Knowles) was his assistant when they met. Now, as a married man he has a rule: No female assistants.

That rule however, has to be waived when Derek is stuck with a comely temp named Lisa. They met and  briefly, modestly flirted before Derek knew she was going to temp for him. Derek didn't think much of the flirtation but Lisa is consumed with it. It's not long before she is making excuses to get him alone and eventually making a serious play on him at the office Christmas party.

Derek turns her down at every turn but unfortunately, he kept the whole thing from his wife. When Lisa makes a dramatic move that gets the cops involved Sharon finds out and Derek's picturesque life is in shambles. Meanwhile, looming from the movie's marketing campaign is that Sharon-Lisa confrontation that is the film's selling point.

Directed by television veteran Stephen Shill, Obsessed is a surprisingly dull slog for what should be a trashy little B-movie filled with cheap thrills. It's as if Shill and company were reluctant to accept their place in the movie world. It's not that they really aspire beyond cheap thrillers but rather that they lack the commitment to be as cheap and nasty as a movie like this needs to be to be successful.

Obsessed wants desperately to match the zeitgeist capturing heights of the similarly themed 80's classic Fatal Attraction. However, it lacks the raw, visceral sexuality of that film, not to mention the utterly fearless performance of Glenn Close. Ali Larter is certainly no Glenn Close. Though quite a beauty, Larter can't Close's commitment and strange, frightening charisma.

As for pop star Beyonce, her limitations as an actress continue to show. Her face, though lovely, is a blank slate in even the most stressful of scenes. Her soundtrack contributions are filled with passion but her acting leaves a great deal to be desired. In the head to head fight with Larter we get some hair pulling and an obvious, predictable end so badly shaded in the opening scenes that you might laugh if you haven't checked out already. Dull, dimwitted and inept, Obsessed fails at the minimal goal of being a cheap thrill.

Movie Review Live from Baghdad

Live from Baghdad (2002) 

Directed by Mick Jackson 

Written by John Patrick Shanley 

Starring Michael Keaton, Helena Bonham Carter, Lili Taylor, Bruce McGill, Kurt Fuller 

Release Date December 7th, 2002 

Published January 12th, 2003

Hollywood has a knack for timing. Right as the meltdown at Three Mile Island was happening, Jane Fonda and Michael Douglas were topping the box office in The China Syndrome. Just as controversy brewed about President Clinton's questionable bombings in Afghanistan, Hollywood released the hysterical political comedy Wag The Dog about a presidential administration that waged a fake war. Now, as we once again sit on the brink of war in Iraq, HBO releases Live From Baghdad, a smart, quickly-paced, entertaining movie that takes us behind the scenes of our first war in Iraq.

The film is based on the writing of CNN producer Robert Wiener, who, with correspondents Bernard Shaw, Peter Arnett, and John Holliman, broadcast live as bombs dropped on Iraq's capital. In the film, Wiener is played by Michael Keaton as a resourceful, quick witted journalist with a great ear for a story and the nerve to go and get it. Wiener, producer Ingrid Formanek (Helena Bonham Carter), and a skeleton crew--including the always-excellent Lily Taylor and Blair Witch victim Joshua Leonard--go to the heart of Iraq to get the story from inside the country.

The crew from CNN put their network on the map with its all-access war coverage. Their first big story is video of Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein posing with "guests" (or hostages, depending upon your perspective.) CNN came under fire for airing the unedited footage, which some viewed as Iraqi propaganda. The next story for the crew is gaining an interview with an American hostage, a story which leads to the interviewee being taken into custody and Wiener's first major crisis of conscience. As we would uncover later, Hussein used American oil workers in Iraq as hostages held in strategic places where the US was likely to drop bombs.

The hostages were released before the bombs began dropping. The big coup was too land an interview with Saddam Hussein, however the things the producer has to promise to get the interview makes you wonder if it's worth it. CBS and Dan Rather land the first interview with Hussein despite Wiener's close relationship with the Iraqi Minister of Information, Naji Al Hadithi, here played by veteran character actor David Suchet. (You don't know the name but, trust me, you would know his face.)

Eventually, CNN would get an interview with Hussein, leading to a surreal photo op of Hussein posing with Wiener, his crew, and correspondent Shaw(Robert Wisdom). But it's not until the bombs begin to drop and CNN becomes America's eyes in Baghdad that the little network that could moves into the big time.

My favorite thing about Live From Baghdad are the performances, especially the group of character actors taking on the difficult roles of CNN reporters. Bruce Mcgill is Arnett and John Carrol Lynch portrays Holliman. (As mentioned above Wisdom is Shaw.) These roles are difficult because these reporters became quite memorable during and after the Gulf War and both Shaw and Arnett remain in front of the cameras to this day. John Holliman passed away in 1999 and Live From Baghdad is dedicated to him.

Mcgill really makes an impression, capturing the modern-day-cowboy attitude of Arnett, who has always loved being in the middle of the action, broadcasting live during the evacuation of Vietnam and other hotspots. Mcgill seems to make an impression in everything he's in. His Robert Hagan was the best part of The Legend Of Bagger Vance in 2000.

With all the media coverage about the Gulf War, one may think there isn't a story left to tell, Live From Baghdad has a story and it's a compelling, exciting story very well told by Keaton, Carter, and Director Mick Jackson. The film was based on the book written by Wiener who also wrote the teleplay, which gives the dialogue a fresh, realistic feel.

Though I found it hard to believe Wiener told Saddam Hussein he loved his tie as he was putting a microphone on the Iraqi dictator, the film teases the reality of it. In the end, it is just really nice to see Keaton back in a lead role, something we haven't seen since the god-awful Christmas movie Jack Frost in 1998. After a movie that bad it was probably a good idea to take some time off. Now he can be welcomed back and I, for one, hope to see more of him. Just no more Christmas movies.

Movie Review Runaway Jury

Runaway Jury (2003) 

Directed by Gary Fleder

Written by Brian Koppelman, David Levien, Matthew Chapman

Starring John Cusack, Gene Hackman, Dustin Hoffman, Rachel Weisz, Jeremy Piven, Bruce McGill

Release Date October October 17th, 2003 

Published October 16th, 2003

John Grisham novels and the movies made from them are a guilty pleasure for millions. I say guilty pleasure because the work is often merely melodramatic potboilers that adopt legal and political stances that the author bends to his melodramatic will. Indeed, the law in a Grisham novel is often specious and more often than not inaccurate, but necessarily inaccurate to fit the story.

That said, the novels are also tightly plotted and populated by colorful Southern characters and terrific dialogue. It's easy for the non-lawyer crowd to forgive Grisham of his factual indiscretions because his work is just so damn entertaining. The latest of Grisham's work easily transplanted to the screen is Runaway Jury, a look at a trial from the jury's perspective.

John Cusack stars as Nick Easter, a seemingly normal video game store clerk. When Nick is called for jury duty, he reacts like most Americans, utter contempt and annoyance. However, that is merely a cover. Nick has been trying for jury duty and the opportunity to sit in on a huge lawsuit against gun manufacturers. Nick, along with his girlfriend Marlee (Rachel Weisz), are rigging the jury in a scam to soak either side to pay them $10 million dollars.

On one side is the noble Southern gentlemen Wendell Rohr (Dustin Hoffman), representing the wife of a stockbroker who was killed in an office shooting by a disgruntled employee with an illegally purchased semi-automatic weapon. It is Rohr's contention that gun manufacturers were aware of and rewarding the illegal sales of their guns by company owned gun stores.

On the opposing side, representing the gun manufacturers is Durrwood Cable (Bruce Davison). He however is merely the legal mouthpiece for a shady jury consultant named Rankin Fitch (Gene Hackman). Fitch is the gun manufacturer’s hired gun for rigging a favorable jury by any means necessary. With the help of his team of investigators, Finch compiles blackmail information against potential jurors.

That sets the tables for a number of clever twists and turns, but not so clever that they wink at the audience. Clever in the sense that they play directly to audience expectations. The twists don't surprise the audience, but they aren't insultingly predictable. Screenwriter Brian Koppelman does a great job of adapting Grisham's tight pacing and colorful characters, even as he is forced to change the trial from Grisham's tobacco companies to gun companies. I say forced to change because lawsuits against tobacco companies aren't exactly a fresh topic.

My favorite part of Runaway Jury however is the film’s unquestionably liberal politics. Where so many films shy away from taking a stand on an issue, Runaway Jury is clearly sympathetic to the liberal cause of gun control. The gun manufacturers are the most thinly drawn characters and their smoke-filled private meetings in which all the major gun companies discuss their conspiracy is so blatantly conspiratorial you marvel at the filmmaker’s brazenly malevolent portrayal.

Director Gary Fleder is the perfect director for Grisham. His last directorial outing was the non-Grisham Grisham movie High Crimes. Both films have a mere gloss of real law and are heavy on the melodrama. Both films cleverly cast their films with actors whose audience cache get us past minor plot holes and specious legal wrangling. Fleder has the same talent for pacing as Grisham and while the story is somewhat unwieldy with a number of small supporting characters that get lost occasionally, Runaway Jury is still a very entertaining legal thriller.

Movie Review Matchstick Men

Matchstick Men (2003) 

Directed by Ridley Scott

Written by Ted Griffin

Starring Nicolas Cage, Sam Rockwell, Allison Lohman, Bruce McGill 

Release Date September 12th, 2003 

Published September 11th, 2003 

Nicholas Cage has had a very unique road to stardom. He began his career on the indie circuit trying to overcome the perception that he was merely Francis Ford Coppola's nephew. He then graduated to unique supporting roles in oddball romances such as Moonstruck and Peggy Sue Got Married. Because he avoided conventional leading man roles, it seemed he was destined for the career of a great supporting actor a la Peter Lorre. Then came his star turn and Oscar for Leaving Las Vegas, a role that completely changed his career. Whether that was a good thing or not is debatable. The role led to starring roles in two awful Jerry Bruckheimer action pics. 

Now Cage seems to be maturing into his stardom, varying his choice in lead roles from bad action like Windtalkers to bad drama like Captain Corelli's Mandolin to the occasional terrific role like the one he had in Bringing Out the Dead. Those great roles are becoming few and far between for Cage, and though his role as a neurotic con man in Ridley Scott's Matchstick Men might seem like a step in the right direction, his career rehab is not entirely successful.

As Roy Waller, Cage is a con man with a conscience. He will still take your money, but he feels bad about it, and his guilt spills out of him in a number of tics and phobias. His partner Frank (Sam Rockwell) has no such qualms about what he does and urges Roy to move up to bigger cons with bigger stakes. In an effort to get Roy to go for the big con, Frank sets Roy up with a psychiatrist (Bruce Altman) who links some of Roy's problems to a child Roy isn't certain he ever had.

Through a little investigation, the psychiatrist locates a woman who indeed had Roy's baby some years ago. The girl, Angela (Alison Lohman), is now a teenager and eager to meet the father she never knew. Angela is quick to insinuate herself into Roy's life and eventually into his profession as he teaches her the tricks of the trade. All the while, Frank is setting up a big-time pigeon (Bruce Mcgill) for what could be a million-dollar con.

Director Ridley Scott has a number of directorial flourishes topping off numerous plot twists. However, much of what happens is predictable and precarious from a story standpoint, as the twists require a good deal of suspension of disbelief that the movie never earns. The most talked about portion of the film is its ending and I won't reveal what happens except to say that you're likely to be disappointed.

To be sure, the film is a pro effort from top to bottom. Scott and his cast give first rate effort at making this dubious plot work. Lohman once again shows great chops as she did in last year's highly underrated White Oleander. Hers is the only fully realized character in Matchstick Men. Rockwell is also strong in a role that is terribly underwritten and too often he disappears entirely from the film.

As for Cage, he's playing a role with tics and gestures and phobias that draw audience attention even while other actors are talking. From an acting standpoint, it's a dream role. However, the tics and gestures overwhelm the performance, and the character gets lost beneath the facade. To be sure, I prefer this role to Cage's dewy-eyed romantics and action dunderheads, but this is no Leaving Las Vegas-like return to acting form.

Many believe that to make a movie about con men you have to have a great con. In reality, the con is merely window dressing, context for great performances and interesting characters and dialogue. Matchstick Men has portions of great performances, and one really good performance by Lohman, but the lack of fully fleshed out characters only calls attention to the window dressing that is a rather weak and predictable con.

Movie Review Legally Blonde 2 Red White and Blonde

Legally Blonde 2 Red, White and Blonde

Directed by Charles Herman Wurmfeld 

Written by Kate Kondell 

Starring Reese Witherspoon, Sally Field, Bruce McGill, Jennifer Coolidge, Bob Newhart, Luke Wilson

Release Date July 2nd, 2003 

Published July 4th, 2003

The first Legally Blonde was a hit completely out of left field. Arriving in July 2001 in the midst of the big time summer blockbusters, it was allowed to fly under the radar and surprise audiences with its ebullience, humor and especially its charismatic star Reese Witherspoon. Prior to Legally Blonde, Witherspoon gave off the aura of an indie actress without a hint of Julia Roberts.

Now with Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde only Julia can match Reese paycheck to paycheck. Unfortunately, with that stardom comes consequence. That meant that this sequel, even opening against the blockbuster Terminator 3, would not fly under the radar and would arrive to the kind of scrutiny the first film was lucky to have avoided.

When the first teaser trailers for Legally Blonde 2 landed in theaters back in January they were met not with the fondness that the first films DVD release met but with a cringing unease. As much as I liked the first film, the teaser trailers hints that Elle Woods would be going to Washington seemed to strain my goodwill. Of course, it didn't help that Witherspoon's follow up to Legally Blonde was the god-awful Sweet Home Alabama. So with all this cynicism I wasn't looking forward to Legally Blonde 2.

We pick up some two years after the original left off. Elle Woods is now a successful Boston attorney planning the wedding of the century to her Harvard professor fiancé Emmett (Luke Wilson). She is also planning on being promoted to partner in her law firm until her wedding plans come into conflict with her career. After Elle decides she would like to invite the mother of her pooch Bruiser to her wedding she finds that mom is a test animal at a research lab that happens to be one of her clients. When she asks that the firm ask the client to quit testing, the head of the firm fires her.

Of course this is the same Elle Woods who managed to graduate Harvard law school when everyone in the world said no, so of course this won't stop her. With a new political consciousness Elle leaves Boston for Washington D.C to work for Congresswoman Rudd (Sally Field), who happens to be a former member of Elle's sorority. Once in Washington, Elle is met with the same skepticism she faced at Harvard as her new colleagues quickly dismiss her blondeness and pep.

Just like in the original, it doesn't take long for Elle to win over her new co-workers and soon she is hard at work on her animal rights bill. With the help of a know it all doorman (Bob Newhart in a welcome cameo), Elle learns the secrets of the Congress members she needs to get her bill passed. Using her few connections and her unique sensibility for schmoozing, Elle wins over another former sorority sister turned crusty congresswoman and a right wing NRA Southern Republican (Bruce McGill) who also happens to be a real dog lover.

The film plays out in the same underdog style as the first film with our ever optimistic heroine confounding her cynical opponents with her kill'em with kindness attitude. That is the great thing about this character, no matter what is in front of her she is unrelenting in her sweetness and optimism. In any other character that much glass half emptiness would become grating but as played by Witherspoon, Elle Woods has a sense of self and unique understanding of people that disarms even the most cynical of onscreen opponents and audience members.

The script however, written by Kate Kondell and Down with Love scribes Eve Ahlert and Dennis Drake is even thinner than the original. Providing mere context is not enough to justify this film’s over the top flights of fancy. including a cringe inducing dance sequence and yet another uncomfortably unfunny turn by Jennifer Coolidge as Elle's pal Paulette. Her tight outfits and Tammy Faye Baker makeup look as if they are about to explode at any moment and her numerous non sequiturs painted as jokes are more creepy than funny.

The thinness of script in the first film was easily forgiven because of Witherspoon's whirlwind performance, so winning that it nothing else mattered. In Legally Blonde 2, Witherspoon has to use all of the goodwill developed in the first film to cover this script and she almost does it. Unfortunately, Witherspoon is saddled with one of those lame endings in which the hero gives a speech that wins everyone over to her side and saves the day. The speech is hokey, beyond anything you have ever heard and blows what little chance the film had of succeeding.

There are a couple good laughs in Legally Blonde 2 and yet another star turn by Reese Witherspoon who earns every dollar of her reported $20 million dollar price tag. She's so good I can almost recommend Legally Blonde 2. Almost.

Movie Review: Cinderella Man

Cinderella Man (2005) 

Directed by Ron Howard 

Written by Cliff Hollingsworth, Akiva Goldsman 

Starring Russell Crowe, Renee Zellweger, Paul Giamatti, Craig Bierko, Bruce McGill 

Release Date June 3rd, 2005

Published June 2nd, 2005 

Legendary depression era writer Damon Runyon dubbed James J. Braddock 'The Cinderella Man'. Runyon, best known for his unique patois and shady underworld characters, found some things he liked about the Braddock story. There was the the underdog unlikeliness of the story and the sports setting, however, the square Mr. Braddock was not really Damon Runyon's favorite kind of character. Runyon may not have been taken much with Ron Howard's equally square biography of Mr. Braddock which takes its name from his writing. Cinderella Man, starring Russell Crowe, features some awesome boxing but the earnest sentimental drama out of the ring crosses quickly over to out and out schmaltz.

Russell Crowe stars as James J. "Bulldog" Braddock who in 1929 was a top ranked Light Heavyweight contender. Braddock was flush with success, cash, a beautiful wife named Mae (Renee Zellweger) and three gorgeous kids. Sadly however in a Jobian succession of ills, Braddock lost nearly everything in the stock market crash of 1929 and a subsequent hand injury that would eventually sidetrack his promising career.

In 1933 Braddock was forced from the ring by his injury and a series of bad fights, mostly ugly brutal losses, though to his credit Braddock was never knocked out. With bills piling up, winter coming and his family living in a dirt floor apartment, Braddock attempts to find work on the docks of New Jersey but there are more men than shifts and he and many others are often excluded.

Forced to beg his former boxing promoters for money, Braddock finds sympathy from his former manager and trainer Joe Gould (Paul Giamatti) who pulls strings to get Braddock his boxing license back and lands him an important fight at Madison Square Garden, playing punching bag to a new top contender. Braddock shockingly knocks the kid out and in so doing, he earns the admiration of fans for his gutty style and his obvious underdog status.

One fight leads to another and eventually Braddock has a showdown with the champion of the world, Max Baer (Craig Bierko). The champ is reputed to have killed two men in the ring, is much bigger than Braddock, and given Braddock's time away from the ring, there is much speculation that Baer might just make it three in ring kills. Braddock's wife Mae is certainly concerned, a bit of drama the film mines for dramatic tension near the end of the film.

Going in to Cinderella Man with no knowledge of whether James J. Braddock won or lost the championship fight lended a great deal of compelling drama to the film's boxing scenes which on top of the suspense, are extraordinarily shot by Director Ron Howard and Cinematographer Salvatore Totino. The boxing is by far the best part of Cinderella Man. The audience I watched with cheered and clapped at the end of each fight as if they were inside that smoky rundown gymnasium.

If the rest of Cinderella Man were as good as the boxing we would be talking about one of the best movies of the year. However the film's script by Cliff Hollingsworth and script doctor Akiva Goldsman is so achingly sentimental you have to fight your eyes to keep them from rolling. The non-boxing scenes overflow with the fairy tale goodness of James Braddock the family man. Braddock is treated with such a soft touch you can hardly believe he would have the will to punch someone, let alone become a boxing champion.

The only thing that keeps Cinderella Man from becoming a complete loss, aside from the boxing, are the performances of Russell Crowe, Renee Zellweger and Paul Giamatti. This awesome cast of real pro actors handle even the most squeamish of squishy dialogue with just the right amount of earnestness and distance. This is a fairy tale underdog story that happened to come true so earnestness and sentimentality are to be expected, but without these great actors this may have well become a Hallmark Hall of Fame TV weepie.

I cannot say enough great things about the boxing scenes in Cinderella Man. Russell Crowe nails the pose, the athleticism, and the raw power of a real boxer while Howard directs around whatever deficiencies Crowe may have had. The boxing scenes are extraordinary and very compelling and really the most memorable thing about Cinderella Man.

It's not that the rest of the film, from the home life drama to the social drama of the depression era setting or the romance between Crowe and Zellweger, never works but that it's all a bit too safe. Despite the gritty ghetto setting and the dingy dive boxing arena, there is very little grit or dirt in Cinderella Man. Braddock was well known for his decency and honor, wonderful qualities but no one is perfect. Director Ron Howard portrays James Braddock as if he were positioning him for sainthood.

This earnest portrayal grows weary after a while and you long for some little bit of dysfunction, some flaw, anything that could shed some light on how this eminently decent gentlemen became a brutal warrior in a boxing ring. Certainly his desperate situation, the fact that he was fighting to feed his family, played a large role in his determination but what aspect of his personality drove him to be a championship contender in the first place? That element is missing from Crowe's performance and the film as a whole.

Director Ron Howard has never been known for his gritty storytelling. You expect Howard to indulge his crowd pleasing nature. He indulges a little too often in Cinderella Man but with the extraordinary boxing scenes and the power of his cast, Howard manages to keep Cinderella Man, at the very least, entertaining all the way to the final bell. It could have been a real contender but as it is, Cinderella Man is a bit of fluffy feel good entertainment.