Movie Review: Cars 2

Cars 2 (2011) 

Directed by John Lasseter 

Written by Ben Queen

Starring Larry the Cable Guy, Owen Wilson, Michael Caine, Emily Mortimer

Release Date June 24th, 2011 

Published June 24th, 2011 

Tow Mater (Larry the Cable Guy) cannot wait for his pal Lightning McQueen (Owen Wilson) to return to their hometown, Radiator Springs. Mater has a whole summer of fun activities for the best friends to play with. However, when Lightning gets talked into entering a special series of global races their plans will be put on hold while they make new plans to travel the globe.

Leaving Radiator Springs for the first time leaves Mater in awe while his typical antics; those that might be charming back home, cause embarrassment for Lightning in front of his fellow race cars. Eventually, however the fish out of water plot is jettisoned for the real plot, a spy story ala Hitchcock, in which the innocent Mater is mistaken for an American super-spy by a pair of British spies, Finn MacMissile (Michael Caine) and Holly Shiftwell (Emily Mortimer).

Mater, Tow Mater

According to the Brits some super-villain is trying to destroy the market for a new kind of alternative fuel that's being used in Lightning's race and to do so the bad guys are targeting the race cars. It will be up to Mater and the Brit spy cars to stop them.

Under normal circumstances, outside of the world of "Cars," I am no fan of Larry the Cable Guy; I find his redneck shtick grating. However, in the role of Mater, Larry is truly amazing. Larry finds a note in Mater's voice that is pitched perfect. Earnest and honest, hopeful and well meaning and when he's injured, Mater's voice takes on a childlike innocence that is honestly poignant.

That's Funny Right There

Oh, and Mater's pretty funny too. A scene in the men's room of the Tokyo race course that could have been a disastrous bit of bathroom humor becomes honestly, outrageously funny for the clever responses of Larry/Mater to the odd, shall we say, 'customs' of this particularly foreign bathroom.

Is "Cars 2" as good as the original "Cars?" No, the sequel lacks the grace notes of the original, mostly due to the lack of Paul Newman's authoritative voice as Doc Hudson. That said, "Cars 2" has its charms thanks to Mater and a really fun spy homage that runs the gamut from Austin Powers to Hitchcock (mistaken identity, a Hitch staple) to, of course, James Bond.

Too Many 'Car' Chases?

The plot lacks depth but it makes up for it by being exciting, if a tad repetitive. It sounds ridiculous to say that "Cars 2" has a few to many car chases but it actually does overdo it a bit on the number of times cars chase after each other through the foreign streets of Tokyo, Rome and London.

"Cars 2" may not rank among Pixar's finest, and it surely doesn't have the polish of the original, but it finds enough fun and adventure for me to recommend it for all audiences. Kids will love it and mom and dad won't be bored. By the way, be sure to show up on time at the theater; "Cars 2" is preceded by a "Toy Story" short film called "Hawaiian Vacation" that is rolling in the aisles funny. The "Toy Story" gang alone would be worth the price of a ticket to see "Cars 2," even at the 3D prices.

Movie Review Pink Panther 2

Pink Panther 2 (2009) 

Directed by Harald Zwart

Written by Steve Martin, Scott Neustader, Michael H. Weber

Starring Steve Martin, Jean Reno, Alfred Molina, Emily Mortimer, Aishwarya Rai, Andy Garcia 

Release Date February 6th, 2009 

Published February 6th, 2009 

Steve Martin used to be funny. I know it. I think. Wait, yes. Yes, Steve Martin was funny. The Jerk was funny. His first few SNL hosting gigs were funny. Three Amigos was funny. It's just that in the last decade or so Steve Martin has been so terribly unfunny that it's easy to forget when he was funny. The bad has been overwhelming the good in recent years. 

Arguably, the nadir of the last decade of Martin's career came when he chose to replace the late great Peter Sellers in The Pink Panther. Martin's The Pink Panther was a slipshod, insulting and stupid little kids movie that showcased Martin as still being able to do a pratfall but not being funny while doing it.  Somehow, Martin has convinced himself that the mess of Pink Panther was ok enough that we need another Pink Panther and though this sequel is slightly more coherent than the first film; Steve Martin remains terribly, forgettable, unfunny.

Inspector Clousseau (Martin) has been busted back down to parking duty when we join the story. However, when the Pink Panther diamond is threatened by a thief who's been stealing treasures all over the world, France turns to Clouseau and a dream team of worldwide investigators to solve the crime. Joining Clouseau in this dream team is Italian ladies man Vincenzo (Andy Garcia), British deductor Pepperidge (Alfred Molina), Japanese tech wizard Kenji (Yuki Matsuzaki) and an alluring true crime writer Sonia (Aishwarya Rai). No points for guessing that one of the dream team is really the bad guy.

Can someone explain to me why Steve Martin and the makers of the Pink Panther movies think the word Hamburger is so hilariously funny? The first film spent far too much of its run time working over that word and the gag continues in the sequel and even less effectively. I'm baffled, why this running gag? Why the word Hamburger? 

Then again, to try and locate some kind of comedic logic in the modern Pink Panther movies is a truly lost cause. This is a movie that still believes politically correct jokes are funny. Lily Tomlin shows up as an American working for the French government trying to fix Clouseau's penchant for politically incorrect statements. The last time these jokes were funny President Clinton was in office.

The Pink Panther 2 is somehow not as bad as the first film but that is a supremely low bar. Dull, witted and predictable, the overall feeling one can take away from Pink Panther 2 is disappointment. Disappointment over the fact that we know Steve Martin used to be funny and he just isn't anymore. And disappointment that The Pink Panther used to be entertaining before it became entwined with Steve Martin. 

Movie Review: Chaos Theory

Chaos Theory (2008) 

Directed by Marcos Siega 

Written by Daniel Taplitz, Kathy Gori

Starring Ryan Reynolds, Stuart Townsend, Emily Mortimer, Sarah Chalke

Release Date April 11th, 2008 

Published October 15th, 2008

Ryan Reynolds carries himself as a man who knows he is a star. Reynolds has Confidence just short of arrogance and a real sense of self onscreen, Reynolds, at times, evinces the earnest friendly quality of Tom Hanks and crosses it with a Johnny Depp-like aversion toward anything to conventional. Don't be mistaken, Reynolds makes conventional movies but like Depp he plays his part in a way that gives convention a noticeable tweak. For his latest movie, the conventional romantic dramedy Chaos Theory Reynolds plays his characters tics and fears as physical expressions and gives a performance of grave irritation.

In Chaos Theory Ryan Reynolds stars as Frank Allen, efficiency expert. Frank gives seminars on time management and lives his life with swiss watch precision. That Frank managed to find a woman willing to put up with his maddening lists and schedules is something of an only in the movies miracle. Emily Mortimer is Susan, a wife of infinite patience. The two were friends for years before she decided of the group of male friends she had amassed, Frank was the one she could see herself with permanantly. That was seven years ago, they have a lovely young daughter now and a life of ease and elegance.

Things change drastically and by chance when a finally snapping Susan decides to push the clock ahead 10 minutes. The result is Frank missing his ferry to the city and having to sheepishly reschedule a talk on time management. If you think being late to work is tough, try being a time management guru and show up late.

Nevertheless, Frank powers through the presentation and meets his pal Buddy (Stuart Townsend) in the lobby. They hit the bar and while Buddy chases skirts Frank drinks a little too much, drowning his inefficient sorrows, and ends up back in his hotel room with Paula (Sarah Chalke, Scrubs) trying to keep from cheating on Susan.

Making a run for it, Frank is involved in a car accident with a pregnant woman. He rushes her to the hospital and a couple of misplaced signatures have him mistaken as the baby daddy. When the pregnant girl disappears the next day, leaving the baby behind, a befuddled Susan receives a call to 'return to the hospital and her baby'. Frank has some explaining to do.

The theory of Chaos Theory is that Frank being late, missing his ferry, sets off a series of chaotic events that leave his marriage in trouble. Had Frank been on schedule perhaps, if he had made it to his ferry and given his talk in time, things could have been different. Now, however, because he was later, he is forced to confront the random, uncontrollable forces of fate.,

Director Marcos Siega and writer Daniel Taplitz start from an interesting place but as the chaos sets in on Frank's life so does it set in on a script that is too uncertain of itself. Is it comedy? Is it drama? The balance is even between the two but without a true perspective a vacuum of ideas develops and Chaos Theory becomes a dramatic/comedic void.

The idea of chaos and order fate and chance, are ideas that many filmmakers have explored with relative success. Siega and Taplitz unfortunately bring no depth or substance to the discussion. Chaos theory, chance, fate, all of these are merely building blocks to a mediocre comedy drama with no real driving dramatic force.

Movie Review Formula 51 aka 51st State

Formula 51 (2002) 

Directed by Ronny Yu 

Written by Stel Pavlou 

Starring Samuel L. Jackson, Robert Carlyle, Emily Mortimer, Rhys Ifans, Meatloaf 

Release Date October 18th, 2002 

Published October 19th, 2002

My local multiplex has been open for about 4 and a half years. In that time I have seen almost every film to come through there. In those 4 and a half years I have never had to ask about their refund policy, because no matter how bad a film I have seen I have never walked out before something was over. Until I saw Formula 51.

This belligerent, aggressively stupid film stars Samuel L. Jackson as Elmo Mcelroy, a legendary drug chemist who’s newest creation is said to be 10 times more powerful than crack. Elmo is expected to give his new product to his boss, known as The Lizard (Meatloaf), but Elmo has other ideas and attempts to kill The Lizard. From there, Elmo takes off for the home of the Beatles, Liverpool, where he plans on cutting a better deal. 

What Elmo doesn’t know is that The Lizard isn’t dead and has a hitwoman searching for him. Emily Mortimer is the expert hitwoman named Dakota. As she plans her hit she finds Elmo in the company of her ex-boyfriend Felix (Robert Carlyle). Dakota’s plans change, and it’s now her job to keep Elmo alive. Also somehow involved in this ridiculousness is a group of Nazi skinheads who want Elmo’s formula.

It was after the skinheads abducted Elmo and Felix that I took my leave of the theater. Not before though the scene where Elmo uses some explosive laxatives to aid in his and Felix’s escape. Director Ronny Yu’s decision to graphically portray the results of the explosive laxative is part of the reason why I walked out, but not the only reason.

Even before the unnecessary laxative closeup, Formula 51 was developing into the kind of film that would think explosive laxatives are funny. This doltish exercise in lethargic action comedy, is supposedly in the mold of Quentin Tarentino mixed with Guy Richie. In actuality it’s a mixture of something Quentin Tarentino pissed on and Guy Richie flushed.

I sat all the way through Rollerball, Fear Dot Com and Sweet Home Alabama. I managed to stay in the theatre all the way through Armageddon and the religious movie Left Behind starring KIRK CAMERON! I have even made it through multiple Freddy Prinze Jr movies all the way to their doltish ends, but I couldn’t make it through Formula 51, possibly the worst film I have ever seen. 

Movie Review Lars and the Real Girl

Lars and the Real Girl (2007) 

Directed by Craig Gillespie

Written by Nancy Oliver

Starring Ryan Gosling, Emily Mortimer, Paul Scheider, Kelli Garner, Patricia Clarkson

Release Date October 12th, 2007 

Published November 8th, 2007

“They’re not real so they last forever, isn’t that neat?” 

I want to start this essay by stating how much I adore the movie Lars and the Real Girl. This article is going to be hyper-critical of the movie and I don’t want anyone thinking that I feel the movie is bad or poorly made. Rather, I think it is a memorable, entertaining and moving work made by people of great empathy and care. On a specific level, regarding the character of Lars, it is a wonderfully told story. That said, I do have some issues with the movie that I feel are valid. 

Lars and the Real Girl centers on Lars, a lonely man who struggles with deep insecurities. When Lars’ sister-in-law, Karin, becomes pregnant, Lars becomes even more withdrawn and unusual than before. His idea to cope with his latest bout of insecurity is to purchase a sex doll, but not for sex. In Lars’ mind, Bianca, the doll, is a real woman who has come to stay while on a missionary trip. Lars gives Bianca a full backstory and a life of her own and even has her stay at his brother Gus's house rather than with him in order to maintain propriety as he sees it. 

As is revealed through dialogue, when Lars was born, his mother died while giving birth. This has bred into Lars a fear of pregnancy as expressed in his awkward and fearful interactions with Karin. Furthermore, Lars’ father was withdrawn and depressed as Lars grew up and he eventually took his own life. This created a sense in Lars of the impermanence of life and deeply set his fears and insecurities regarding losing people he cares about. 

Are you sensing a pattern? Lars and the Real Girl appears to have an origin story for every one of Lars’ insecurities. When Lars acts out and buys Bianca and then settles into the delusion that Bianca is a real person with a real life and a voice that he can hear and converse with, the movie has an answer as to why and sets about showing off a solution to Lars’ many problems. That solution involves everyone in Lars’ life and the town in which he lives, going along with his delusion that Bianca is real 

And it works, eventually, Lars begins to enact Bianca’s death, a death that is symbolic and cathartic, a necessary step toward his recovery and re-emergence into a more normal life. It’s not simple, per se, the movie doesn’t take shortcuts. Rather, my issue is how neat it all is. I’m not a professional psychologist but even I know that what Lars is going through is a dissociative state that he can and likely will overcome with a symbolic gesture and a little help. 

But you don't have to have even minor knowledge of psychology to see that Director Craig Gillespie and writer Nancy Oliver leaning over shoulder through the movie and asking you if you understood the deeper meaning of their movie. The constant back stories every one of Lars' quirky personality traits, the source of his trauma, the grief and drama that like caused him to delusionally disassociate from the world is revealed and underlined in often heavyhanded dialogue, just to make sure that the dum-dums in the audience understood the origin story for every aspect of Lars' life. 

I'm certainly critical of this aspect of Lars and the Real Girl, I do believe the movie is overbearing in how the script occasionally looks down upon the audience. But, I do not hate this movie. In fact, I have a deep affection for Lars and the Real Girl, an affection deeply tied to Ryan Gosling's remarkable and unique performance as Lars. Gosling is incredible at portraying a traumatized and infantilized young man slowly beginning to recover but unlikely to ever be fully recovered. He's gone through too much and been stunted for so long that he will likely struggle the rest of his life. 

That fact is at the heart of Lars and the Real Girl which, though it appears to have a happy ending, it is just melancholy enough to leave you feeling a wealth of empathy for Lars, hoping he can move forward but clear in the knowledge of how deeply damaged and often low functioning he is. It's remarkable that a movie and an actor can communicate that kind of depth, even as Lars and the Real Girl tends to lean far too heavily into exposition.