Movie Review Poseidon

Poseidon (2006)

Directed by Wolfgang Peterson

Written by Mark Protosevich

Starring Josh Lucas, Kurt Russell, Richard Dreyfuss, Emmy Rossum, Mike Vogel, Mia Maestro

Release Date May 12th, 2006

Published May 11th, 2006

The 1972 original The Poseidon Adventure was a dopey all star marathon of water logged cheesiness. From Gene Hackman's turtleneck to Shelley Winters swimming, to Red Buttons closeted fabulousness, there is nothing but pure camp fun to be found in this ludicrous disaster epic.

This is why I was not so vehemently opposed to the film being remade. I find it refreshing to find filmmakers leaving the classics alone and attempting to make a bad movie into a good one. The attempt is a miserable failure but at least we aren't left with a shot for shot remake of Psycho haunting video store shelves as the shame of shame.

Poseidon stars Josh Lucas as an inveterate gambler named Dylan who boards the ocean liner Poseidon looking for rich victims to play poker with. Dylan cares about no one but himself, so, of course, when the supposedly unsinkable ship is flipped by a freakishly large wave it is Dylan who must lead potential survivors to safety.

Why Dylan and not, say, the former Mayor of New York and hero fireman Robert Ramsey (Kurt Russell)? Probably because Lucas is younger, better looking and studios think he is a star on the rise. At Least that is the cynical answer. The plot however says that Dylan is simply luckier in finding conveniently placed maps of the ship that he uses to find the one spot where people can escape.

Along for the ride, as cannon fodder mostly, are Robert's daughter Jennifer (Emmy Rossum) her fiancee Christian (Mike Vogel), single mom Maggie (Jascinda Barrett) and her son Conor (Jimmy Bennett), Richard (Richard Dreyfuss) a suicidal gay man and Elena (Mia Maestro) a stowaway.

Together they navigate the upside down ship through fiery galleys, explosions above and below and most perilous of all some of the worst dialogue ever enunciated by professional actors in a major motion picture.

The first Poseidon had some serious cheeseball dialogue, especially from Ernest Borgnine and Stella Stevens as the bickering Roggo's, a pairing that has seen more than one brilliant send up on The Simpsons. Unfortunately even Borgnine and Stevens would be embarrassed by the kind of tripe served up as meaningful dialogue in the new Poseidon.

As an example, check the exchange between Richard Dreyfuss's inappropriately flamboyant Richard and Freddie Rodriguez's Marco as poor Marco is navigating a particularly dangerous corridor. Richard picks this moment, as fire and steam and a quickly falling apart bridge threaten poor Marco, to come flying out of the closet and hit on Marco. It's bad enough to make one wonder if Marco chose the fiery depths of the inflamed water over survival. 

The exchanges between Kurt Russell, usually quite reliable even in a garbage picture, and Josh Lucas are just as ludicrous. Listen as Dylan establishes his rebel persona as Russell asks the question we all want to know as the ship begins to sink "Don't you care about anyone other than yourself!". No he doesn't, except maybe Maggie aka the plot device love interest put in place to humanize him, as if a flipped over cruise ship just were not enough motivation.

As bad as Poseidon is, director Wolfgang Peterson is far too talented to make a film so bad it's good. Thus we get some very competent action scenes and some exceptional CGI effects. These elements add up to nothing except incongruity. The competence feels out of place amongst the shoddy whole of Poseidon.

Forget about the media garbage that the disaster in Poseidon is anything akin to the real life disaster of the tsunami or that the passengers' escape is anything akin to watching people flee the twin towers on 9/11. Poseidon is far from a cheeseball for that kind of analysis. Even a wry allusion to these real life disasters in comparison to Poseidon feels crass.

After watching Sony try to sell us Josh Lucas as the hero of Stealth last summer and now watching Josh in Poseidon I've come to the conclusion that Josh Lucas is the New Coke of action heroes. We never asked for him, we don't know where he came from, all we know is that when we went for the new Schwarzenegger or Gibson all we could find on the shelf was this guy.

It's not that Lucas is a bad actor, he was terrific in the little seen dramedy Around The Bend with Christopher Walken, it may just be that action hero is not his thing. Much like his near twin brother Matthew McConaughey, Lucas has that lackadaisical, laid back slacker thing going on. It's an affectation that just does not play in the macho genre but suits him well in movies like An Unfinished Life or his small role in A Beautiful Mind.

As for Kurt Russell in a better movie he could have been a very effective lead. Unfortunately, saddled with a script that gives him one note to play, protective father, he cannot escape the dreariness around him. For me he was the film's most entertaining player but only because during the many, many moments of boredom in Poseidon I would drift off and imagine what Snake Plissken would do on an upside down, exploding boat. I imagine there would be alot of killing and at least one scene of Snake lighting a cigar off of a flaming corpse. Call it Escape From The Exploding Upside Down Boat.

You know a movie stinks when you are dreaming of your own movie while watching it.

It is the rare disaster epic that makes you root for the disaster. Poseidon is that disaster epic.

Movie Review In the Time of the Butterflies

In the Time of the Butterflies (2001) 

Directed by Mariano Barroso

Written by Julia Alvarez, David Klass 

Starring Salma Hayek, Edward James Olmos, Mia Maestro, Demian Bechir, Marc Anthony 

Release Date October 21st, 2001 

Published May 5th, 2002 

I had never heard of author Julia Alvarez before I rented In the Time of the Butterflies, a film adaptation of her book of the same title. After seeing the film I'm interested in reading her book which has to be far more and enlightening and textured than the sappy, melodramatic film version of the lives of three martyred sisters.

The story begins in the late 1930's on the island of the Dominican Republic where the Marabel sisters, Minerva (Salma Hayek), Patria (Lumi Cadazos) and Maria (Mia Maestro) have finally been allowed by their parents to attend school. One day during a visit to the school by Dominican dictator Trujillo (Edward James Olmos), Minerva prevents a classmate from attempting to assassinate the dictator. Trujillo promises Minerva he will never forget her and Minerva sets out to make sure he won't.

Flash forward a few years; Minerva and her family are invited to Trujillo's mansion for a party. Trujillo asks Minerva to dance but when he gets a little too fresh with her, Minerva slaps him. Soon after, Minerva's father is arrested and Minerva must once again see the dictator to beg for her father’s freedom.

If you think this plot description is long, wait ‘til you see the film itself that is quite leisurely in pace.

Minerva goes to college and while there meets and falls in love with a revolutionary named Manolo (Demien Bechir). The two begin to try to overthrow Trujillo, fighting mostly on the information front, attempting to educate the Dominican people as to what Trujillo is doing to maintain his power. It's a good idea in theory but as the film later shows everyone is quite aware of what Trujillo was up to they were just to afraid to say anything.

It is informational gaffes like this and odd fast forwards in the timeframe that muddle the film’s narrative and keeps it's characters distant. The movie only gives us the opportunity to get to know Hayek's character while only glimpsing the other characters. From what I've read, the book is focused on all three sisters whereas the film has just one fully fleshed out character - Minerva. This semi-restricted narrative leaves the other sister’s motivations unclear. We the audience are left wondering why they joined the revolution.

Butterflies is surprisingly short at a mere 90 minutes and it's shocking violent conclusion comes almost out of nowhere. If your hoping for some insight into Dominican history and it's most infamous dictator, you won't find it here. The film buries its politics under heaping helpings of melodrama and leaden dialogue. See it for Salma Hayek whose performance is strong, but if your not a fan you can skip this one.

Movie Review Frida

Frida (2002) 

Directed by Julie Taymor

Written by Clancy Sigal, Gregory Nava

Starring Salma Hayek, Alfred Molina, Geoffrey Rush, Valeria Golino, Mia Maestro, Antonio Banderas

Release Date October 25th, 2002

Published November 2nd, 2002 

Less than two years ago, there were three Frida Kahlo film projects competing to get to the screen first. One of the films was to star Jennifer Lopez and, according to rumors, made it as far as costume and makeup tests. Another was to star Madonna and was rumored to have made it as far as location scouting. The one that finally was made stars Salma Hayek, is directed by Julie Taymor, and will go down as THE definitive telling of this brilliant artist's profound life.

In 1922 Mexico City, schoolgirl Frida Kahlo is joined with some male school friends in spying on visiting artist Diego Rivera as he paints a nude model in the school auditorium. It is the first time Rivera and Kahlo meet but certainly not the last. Before these two amazing artists finally come together, fate intervenes by way of a bus accident that almost kills Frida, but instead leaves her nearly crippled. After a year of painful operations, treatments, and endless days in bed, Frida is finally well enough to walk again and is ready to seek out Rivera to show him her art.

While she is desperate for Rivera's opinion, she cannot necessarily trust his positive assessment based on his well-known appetite for sleeping with beautiful young artists. Nevertheless, Rivera's honest love of her work begins a relationship that, though troubled, will last a long time.

Rivera, as played by a nearly unrecognizable Alfred Molina, is a proud Communist, politician and artist. Rivera is a passionate, talented artist with appetites as big as his talents are and Frida matches him all the way. However, no matter how much they respect and love each other Diego can't keep from cheating and, out of necessity for revenge, neither can Frida. Salma Hayek's performance is remarkable. Vibrant and intelligent she captures the essence of not only the legend of Kahlo but also her art. Hayek communicates from deep within herself from where the art that ended up on the canvas came. During the many years she was bedridden by her injuries, Kahlo lived inside her head, and her wild imagination, combined with her spirited life with Rivera, are what fueled her amazing works of art.

Director Julie Taymor (Titus) makes an awesome statement with this film, showing herself to be an artist to watch. Taymor--the renowned Broadway director--proves that she is also a film director we will be talking about for years to come. What is so astounding is that she takes a simple biopic and brings it to life with a wild imagination that Kahlo herself would have appreciated. The hardest part of making a film about an artist is how to show the work of art in progress. 

In Frida, Taymor chooses to go inside Kahlo's mind and allow the audience to see the painting as the artist imagined it. Through the use of some astonishing animation, the makeup and effects come to life and then melt on the canvas before our eyes. This is a truly imaginative and lovely idea, worked to near perfection.

I have always had a major pet peeve about films made in Mexico, which is that is that for some reason they always lack color. For the most part any film of Mexican or Spanish heritage seems to be washed out in a brown hue that makes everything look like it is covered in dirt. This film does not do that. Instead, it takes advantage of color, painting the screen with gorgeous color from the architecture to the costumes and, of course, to the paintings.

The film is not perfect. For one thing, I was disappointed that it was done in English instead of Spanish, a decision that seemingly was made entirely based on box office. For the purpose of artistic integrity, a film that centers around Mexican artists should be done in Spanish. It seems that Miramax, the film's producers and distributors, did not trust the audience to be intelligent enough to appreciate a film with subtitles, and accordingly, we get a film shot in Mexico City with street signs in the native language where the characters speak English.

That minor complaint aside, Frida is a remarkable film; truly beautiful and magnificent. Frida Kahlo's life was one that was well lived and well portrayed by Salma Hayek who deserves an Oscar nomination. Frida is one of the best films of 2002.