Movie Review: The Switch

The Switch (2010) 

Directed by Will Speck, Josh Gordon

Written by Allan Loeb

Starring Jennifer Aniston, Jason Bateman, Patrick Wilson, Jeff Goldblum 

Release Date August 20th, 2010

Published August 19th, 2010

There is chemistry between Jennifer Aniston and Jason Bateman despite what you see in the new movie The Switch. In a rare few scenes of this disposable formula comedy from the Hollywood factory floor Aniston radiates warmth and Bateman shows wit and the personalities that I'm sure they thought these characters had shines through.

These scenes are all too brief and surrounded by so much tripe that I cannot recommend you bother searching for the good moments, I can merely assure you those moments really are there. The Switch buries what good there is between the two leads beneath so much banal, humorless chatter that sifting the remains becomes a dumpster dive.

The Switch stars Bateman as sadsack stock trader Wally who is in love with his best friend Kassie (Aniston) though he doesn't yet know it. Kassie doesn't know it either but only through a massive level of cluelessness. Both are in their early 40's when Kassie announces she wants a baby and will be getting an artificial insemination.

Wally is opposed to this plan, not because his best friend is aiming to become a 40 something single mom but because he's in love with her but incapable of admitting it. Thus we arrive at the title plot; at a party where Kassie will be inseminated (is this really something people do?) Wally get wasted and stumbles on the sperm, plays with the sample cup and accidentally spills it. His solution? Give a new sample. These scenes are handled with the implied level of dignity, i.e none whatsoever for poor Jason Bateman, or poorer still, Diane Sawyer. Don't ask.

Cut to 7 years later, Kassie moved to Minnesota with her new baby but is now ready to return to New York. Wally is waiting and because he doesn't remember making the switch, he doesn't know the kid, Sebastian (Thomas Robinson), is his. Oh but he will find out and then tell Kassie and well you can figure out where all of this is going.

There is a talented ensemble rounding out the cast of The Switch including veterans Juliette Lewis and the wonderful Jeff Goldblum, but sadly all are stranded in a go nowhere script by Allen Loeb and the atonal direction of Josh Gordon and Will Speck. As the actors ache to bring something more to these characters they are shredded down to essences, Wally is morose and bumbling, Kassie is shrill and clueless and everyone else is rendered unimportant, more walking exposition than characters.

Scenes arrive and thud as the characters sketch the plot points and the scene ends without anything funny happening. The dialogue is witless and the direction strips out nuance in favor of hitting imaginary points along the lines of a map toward banal, middle of the road Hollywood romance.

The Switch is more concept than movie. Jeffrey Eugenides conceived the idea for his short story The Baster which is a thoughtful if slightly depressing short story published by the New Yorker in 1996. That story involved characters who were aware of their feelings, abortion and a deep history between the characters that Eugenides manages to communicate with an economy of words that would barely add up to 3 or 4 scenes in The Switch. 

Gone is any hint of honest back-story replaced with cluelessness that becomes not a running gag as maybe it should have been but is instead one of the artificial roadblocks used to pad this story out to feature film length. The other device is Patrick Wilson as Roland the cuckold in waiting who exists only to sustain the unlikely notion that Wally and Kassie won't end up together. 

I will leave you to discover what happened in Mr. Eugenides' far superior short story; you don't need a map or a spoiler alert to intuit where things are headed in The Switch. As with any romantic comedy it's not about the destination, we know what's expected and what we all want to happen in a rom-com. The key is crafting a journey for the audience that is smart, funny and diverting enough to make the inevitable payoff worth your time. The Switch fails miserably on this front by crafting a tedious, unfunny journey. 

It's a real shame because there is a moment when Jason Bateman is watching the kid, now 6 years old, and Jennifer Aniston walks in just watches Bateman and the kid. In this moment you can see the potential and when they finally look at one another you can sense the better movie that these two talented people could have made were they not saddled with the conventions of such an insipid and typical Hollywood formula.

Movie Review: Blades of Glory

Blades of Glory (2007) 

Directed by Josh Gordon, Will Speck

Written by John Altschuler

Starring Will Ferrell, Jon Heder, Will Arnett, Amy Poehler, Jenna Fischer

Release Date March 30th, 2007

Published March 29th, 2007

How does a film critic approach something like the new Will Ferrell comedy Blades of Glory. It's not so much a movie as it is a series of skits featuring the same characters. Yes, there is the vague sense of a narrative and a sense of filmmaking skill involved in the capturing of the various skits, but is it really a movie in the classic sense of the term? Not really. Blades Of Glory may not be a real 'movie' but as a series of skits; cut together; and presented on the big screen; it is rather hilarious.

Will Ferrell stars in Blades Of Glory as Chazz Michael Michaels. We are told that he is a world championship figure skater whose showmanship has earned him the nickname "Sex on Ice". His main rival is a sweet natured, orphan turned prodigy; Jimmy McElroy (Jon Heder). When we meet them for the first time, in dueling TV highlight packages, they are competing for the world championship in men's figure skating.

Michaels with his trademark fireballs and McElroy with his own trademark bird-like moves, manage a tie for the gold medal but neither is satisfied. On the medal stand the two rivals argue and push and shove and finally break down into the kind of catfight one might not stereotypically expect from figure skaters. Soon both skaters are bloodied and the mascot is on fire.

The fight gets both skaters stripped of their medals and banned from skating. Oh, but there is a loophole. They were banned from men's singles skating, not pairs. Eventually, Jimmy's coach (Craig T. Nelson) gets the brilliant idea to pair the rivals as the first male figure skating pair in history, much to the dismay of the top pairs couple in the world Stranz and Fairchild Van Waldenberg (Will Arnett and Amy Poehler). The brother sister pair make it their mission to destroy their new rival with the help of their mousy little sister Katie (Jenna Fischer) who caught Jimmy's eye.

OK, there is a semblance of a plot here. However, watching it unfold and describing it are two very different things. Watching Blades of Glory I was left waiting for the movie to begin. Every scene is the set-up of a bit, closed with a punchline ending. There is little story progression, almost no character development and what little there is, is undone quickly by another gag/punchline ending. That said, most of the gags and punchlines in Blades of Glory are pretty funny and that goes a long way in excusing the film's faults.

I promise not to give away any of the great jokes in Blades of Glory except to say keep an eye on the hot dog guy. This one line day player has the best joke in the movie. Also stealing the show is costume designer Julie Weiss whose Flash Gordon meets Tron designs are absolutely priceless. The costumes in the final performance may in fact get the loudest laugh of anything in the film.

Will Ferrell is... Will Ferrell. He's everything you expect him to be in Blades of Glory, obnoxious, clueless, occasionally drunk and it works for him. What is odd is watching Ferrell try and share the screen with Heder who, though likable, is not on Will's plain in terms of starpower. In fact, Ferrell's role is really a glorified supporting role. Heder is the one with the more pronounced arc and he gets the girl. Ferrell merely sweeps in for punchlines. Pretty well, all of them.

For those who stick around for the credits and want to know who that is singing that oddly earnest sounding "Blades of Glory" theme song, it's not Survivor or the remaining members of Boston. It's former American Idol contestant Bo Bice.

I don't think Blades of Glory is very good as a movie but as a series of laughs strung together; I must admit, I laughed alot. Will Ferrell as a figure skater is enough to produce a chuckle. When decked out in spandex skating to Foreigner tunes, he is just a scream. There may not be a plot but when the jokes are this funny it's hard to complain to much. I guess; you could call this a recommendation for Blades of Glory.