Movie Review My Best Friend's Girl

My Best Friend's Girl (2008) 

Directed by Howard Deutch

Written by Jordan Kahan 

Starring Dane Cook, Kate Hudson, Jason Biggs, Lizzy Kaplan, Alec Baldwin

Release Date September 19th, 2008

Published September 19th, 2008 

Picture in your mind's eye Kate Hudson. Blonde and beautiful with a screwball quality that she got from her mom Goldie Hawn. Now imagine Jason Biggs. The pie guy from American Pie. Twitchy, neurotic far from conventionally handsome. Considering his most recent roles, gay/not gay in Over Her Dead Body, 12 bananna to Paul Walker and a bunch of dogs in Eight Below.

To believe the premise of the new romantic comedy My Best Friend's Girl you have to buy the idea that Hudson and Biggs could ever have been a couple. Then again, if this were the only contrivance of this insulting and stupid comedy, things might not be so dismal.

In My Best Friend's Girl Jason Biggs plays Dusty, a whiny, needy little dweeb who somehow has for five weeks been the steady companion of Kate Hudson's Alexis. After Dusty takes her out to an expensive dinner and fumblingly confesses his love for her Alexis finally realizes just how much time she has wasted. She dumps him.

Returning home, Dusty confides in his roommate Tank (Dane Cook). What luck for Dusty that his roommate has a side business being a misogynist a-hole to depressed women. Tank's gig is going out with girls who have just dumped douchebags, cheaters and jerks. Tank takes the girls out, is a complete pig and the girls go crying back to the ex's who look kind and wonderful by comparison.

So Dusty hires Tank to work his anti-magic on Alexis and.....

If you don't already know where this is going you should consider your mental health alternatives. The plot could not be more insultingly predictable if it were a Dane Cook stand up routine. Directed by Howard Deutsch, who was once the gentle, thoughtful director of Pretty In Pink and Some Kind of Wonderful, My Best Friend's Girl grinds through an achingly conventional plot attempting to liven things up by allowing Cook's Tank to ratchet up his sociopathy.

Apparently we are supposed to find Tank endearing in the same way we found Will Smith's Hitch charming. Both characters are all about helping guys in need right? Yup, they are really alike. Except that Hitch is played by Will Smith with the charm and warmth of.. well Will freaking Smith. Tank is played by Dane Cook in his typically spastic, unpleasant fashion.

As a stand up comic Dane Cook masks bad jokes behind the veneer of gangliness. spasming limbs and pseudo-clever catchphrases. Invariably, ask a Cook fan, usually college age and female, why he is so funny and they will reply that he is "hot". There is no denying that at over 6 feet tall, muscled up and insanely self confident, Cook knows how to draw people to him.

That appeal however has yet to find a film forum. Instead, the roles Dane Cook plays inevitably feel like roles Adam Sandler turned down. He has never seemed natural or comfortable on screen. He strains for every punchline, much like his physical begging for laughs in his stand up, and hides very often behind broad misogynistic or gag reflex humor.

Don't believe the misogynist thing? In My Best Friend's Girl, like the worst of Sandler's shtick, every woman is excitedly in love with Cook. It doesn't matter what a dirtball he is, every woman on screen is commanded to swoon over him. This is the ego of the misogynist. And while some of you will dismiss it as harmless, I worry about the message we are sending to the young girls growing up as Dane Cook fans.

My Best Friend's Girl has an unexpressed bitter sadness to it. The premise is hate filled and desperate and then forces itself toward a saccharine happy ending. Howard Deutsch should know better. Then again, he has directed 3 sequels to films where he did not direct the original. He has developed into a hack and saddled with an awful script and Dane Cook in the cast the writing was on the wall from production day 1.

Kate Hudson's career meltdown is too sad to consider while Jason Biggs is just pathetic. Dane Cook however is a disaster. He was already not very funny. Asked to play a jerk character only amplifies the qualities that make him unwatchable.

Movie Review: Employee of the Month

Employee of the Month (2006) 

Directed by Greg Coolidge

Written by Don Calame, Chris Conroy 

Starring Dane Cook, Jessica Simpson, Dax Shepard, Andy Dick, Harland Williams

Release Date October 6th, 2006 

Published October 5th, 2006

Dane Cook is a comedian whose energetic style often masks some pretty mundane material. That may be why he was cast in the comedy Employee of the Month. The humor of Employee, written by Don Calame and Chris Conway and directed by Greg Coolidge, is lethargic to the point of non-existence. It needs a charismatic comic presence to make it even moderately humorous.

Unfortunately Cook delivers a performance as lazy as the comic material in the film and thus Employee of the Month is a tedious moviegoing experience.

In Employee of the Month Dane Cook stars as Zach a ten year member of the Super Value family. Ten years he has worked there without ever advancing beyond the role of box boy. Meanwhile, his arch-nemesis Vince (Dax Shepard) is in line to become assistant manager someday. Vince is a superstar cashier whose speed with a pricing gun has earned him Employee of the Month 17 months in a row, not to mention lines of cashier groupies.

The feud between Zack and Vince comes to a head when a new cashier joins the team. Her name is Amy (Jessica Simpson) and the rumor mill has it that she only dates the employee of the month. Now; slacker Zack, who has only existed to this point to be unnoticed, must become a model employee if he is to defeat Vince for employee of the month and win the affections of the smoking hot Amy.

That is the basic gist of Employee of the Month a factory produced comedy from Lionsgate meant to take advantage of the rising starpower of comedian Dane Cook. Unfortunately for Lionsgate, the film they made does nothing to take advantage of Cook's style. Dane Cook is a comic whose energy often masks material that is kind of weak. Cook is a relationship comic who uses clever twist of phrase and his lanky physicality to sell material that is kind of funny but not exactly brilliant.

The material of Employee of the Month fits Cook's style but the performance coaxed from the comic by director Greg Coolidge is lazy, something that Cook doesn't do well. Cook can pull off slacker but lazy he is not. His stage shows are marathons of energy and charisma and because he is not a very good actor; sticking closely to what Cook does well would have been better than trying to shoehorn him into this character.

There is one funny thing about Employee of the Month but, unfortunately, I don't believe it was intended to be funny. Jessica Simpson earns all of the biggest laughs in the film but not because she can deliver a terrific punchline. Simpson, more often than not, is the punchline. With  her plunging neckline arriving in many scenes well before she does, Simpson is like a dimmer version of Pamela Anderson; who at least has the awareness to know why people are staring at her.

Simpson's every line delivered with a slight girlish giggle as if every word were a new kind of embarrassment. This is a performance of spectacular awfulness, the kind of performance the Razzies were created to honor, point and laugh at. On the bright side, at least Simpson gives us something to laugh at in this otherwise humor free comedy.

Dane Cook could become a big time movie star with the right material. While I don't believe he is that great a comic, he is charismatic and clever. Women seem to find him attractive, they make up a large part of his mostly college based following. He has all of the basic elements of stardom and only needs the right vehicle to break out of the pack.

Employee of the Month is bad material combined with a director who doesn't quite understand how to get the right performances from his actors. Cook needed more energy and Simpson needed to not be cast at all. Then, maybe, Employee of the Month might not be the complete waste of film stock that it is.

Movie Review Stuck on You

Stuck on You (2003) 

Directed by The Farrelly Brothers 

Written by The Farrelly Brothers

Starring Matt Damon, Greg Kinnear, Cher, Eva Mendes, Seymour Cassell, Dane Cook, Lin Shaye, Bella Thorne 

Release Date December 12th, 2003

Published December 11th, 2003 

The Farrelly Brothers signature had always been juvenile grossout humor tinged with sweetness. With Shallow Hal, they seemed somewhat tame in the gross stuff. Now with their latest film Stuck On You, they seem to have moved beyond the grossout humor completely. What's really surprising however is that they prove just how much they don't need it anymore. This funny, sweet and unusual comedy about conjoined twins is some of the best work the Brothers have done since There's Something About Mary.

Walt (Greg Kinnear) and Bob (Matt Damon) were born attached by a single liver so dangerously small that doctors don't believe they can be separated. Thus the two have gone through life together playing sports, dating and running a restaurant on Martha's Vineyard where friends and family have come to completely accept the boys as they are.

Walt has recently become restless. His ambition has always been to be an actor and his one man shows at the community theater have all been well reviewed, even as poor Bob suffered from severe stage fright. Walt wishes to go to Hollywood and despite his reservations, Bob finally relents. The two leave behind their comfortable surroundings for the big city and Walt's shot at the big time.

Once in Hollywood it's not long until Walt hits the big time with a role opposite Cher on a CSI-esque show. All is not as it seems however, as Cher has hand selected Walt to be on the show in hopes that his being a conjoined twin will get the show canceled. Much to Cher's dismay, Walt turns out to be a hit and the producers find it easy to hide Bob behind props and with special effects. Even after their secret gets out, Walt becomes an even bigger hit.

As for Walt, moving to Los Angeles offers him the chance to meet his internet pen pal May (Wenn Yann Shih) who does not know he is conjoined. This leads to rather obvious jokes as Walt and Bob date May, with the help of an actress friend from their apartment complex April (Eva Mendes) coming along as Walt's date. The joke is obvious but the actors play it so well that it's easy to overlook that.

Naturally the subjects of surgery to separate themselves come up and these scenes are really terrific. I love how the film explains the age difference between Kinnear and Damon along with various other physiological complications. All of it handled without falling back on grossout humor but with the Farrelly Brothers other signature, sweet-natured ridiculousness. Both Bob and Walt are typical, delightfully clueless Farrelly characters who can't imagine why anyone would find them unusual.

The cast is terrific from top to bottom. Kinnear and Damon have a terrific chemistry with Damon really surprising us with his comic talent. You expect Kinnear to have great comic timing as he showed on TV's Talk Soup and the movie Sabrina. For Damon however, though he showed terrific humility in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, this is his first full-length comedic performance and I was surprised how well he pulled it off.

The supporting cast is every bit the equal of the leads with Eva Mendes really standing out. Her bubble-headed actress April provides some of the biggest laughs of the film with her ditzy reactions to the twins’ condition. The way she just thinks that the twins being connected is totally natural is priceless and part of the film’s charm. Cher is also good, perfectly willing to make herself the joke in what is her biggest acting role in a while. Watch out for a pair of terrific cameos as well, Meryl Streep shows up near the end and brings the house down.

The film is not as funny as Kingpin or as sweet as There's Something About Mary but Stuck On You proves that with or without shocking the audience with sight gags, the Farrelly brothers are just plain funny.

Movie Review: Dan in Real Life

Dan in Real Life (2007)

Directed by Peter Hedges

Written by Pierce Gardner, Peter Hedges

Starring Steve Carell, Dane Cook, Juliette Binoche, Dianne Wiest, John Mahoney, Emily Blunt

Release Date October 26, 2007 

Published October 25th, 2007 

Peter Hedges' film  Pieces Of April was a funky little indie feature about family and togetherness, secrets and lies. The visual style was risky in how disjointed and even at times ugly and stylishly amateur it was. Now, Peter Hedges is moving up to big time mainstream filmmaking and it seems that the move to the studio has taken away his flair for the risky and the funky. His latest, Dan In Real Life, could not be less risky or funky. A straight laced genre romance, Dan In Real Life is a warm but extraordinarily dull little mainstream sitcom, something of a disappointment for a rising star director.

Steve Carell stars as Dan Burns, an advice columnist raising three daughters. Dan lost his wife years ago and is convinced that he is done with relationships. That changes on a family trip to Rhode Island where his parents (Diane Wiest and John Mahoney) live in a lovely beach house where the entire extended family gathers for a week every year.

While getting away for a few hours from his daughters, each of whom are upset with dad for different reasons, Dan meets Marie (Juliette Binoche). The two spark a conversation about books that leads to coffee and scones and eventually to Marie giving Dan her phone number, despite the fact that she is town with her boyfriend and is meeting his family. What a shock then, that the boyfriend happens to be Dan's brother Mitch (Dane Cook). Now Dan must decide whether he should risk everything and pursue his brothers girl or deny the first new love he's felt since his wife passed away.

Nearly everything about Peter Hedges' charming directorial debut Pieces of April is missing from the machine like Dan In Real Life. Churning through the required scenes of a romantic comedy, Dan In Real Life feels forced throughout. The fake vibe of the whole enterprise rises to levels of smarm that are nearly stomach turning.

If Steve Carell and Juliette Binoche weren't such terrifically lovable actors Dan In Real Life would be an absolute chore to sit through. As it is, Carell and Binoche have almost zero chemistry together but just enough likability for us not to be entirely bored by them. Without resorting to mugging or cuteness, Steve Carell still manages to squeeze a couple of laughs out of this story but not nearly enough to make Dan in Real Life worth watching.

As for Juliette Binoche the lovely French actress coasts on her talent in a role she could have performed in her sleep. There is nothing really challenging in this script, unless you consider pretending to want Dane Cook, a challenge, and some might. Dan In Real Life throws highly typical romantic comedy roadblocks in front of Binoche and Carell and both actors go through the motions of not being together before the inevitable and obvious conclusion.

Director Peter Hedges is far more talented than this sitcom in movie clothing suggests. I can't help but feel that Dan In Real Life and not Pieces of April is the anomaly of his career. Pieces of April was smart and funny and a little risky in both the storytelling and style. Dan in Real Life is the antithesis of risky. Nothing could be less risky than this puppy dog romantic comedy made from the leftovers of several other dull, forgettable romances.

Movie Review Mr. Brooks

Mr. Brooks (2007) 

Directed by Bruce A. Evans 

Written by Bruce A. Evans, Raynold Gideon 

Starring Kevin Costner, Demi Moore, Dane Cook, William Hurt, Marg Helgenberger

Release Date June 1st, 2007 

Published May 31st, 2007

The career of Kevin Costner has had many ups and downs. He has been one of the biggest stars in the world and People Magazine's sexiest man alive. He's also been the most reviled man in Hollywood and a grand punch line after his triple failures, Waterworld, The Postman and Wyatt Earp. He has recently tried to reinvent himself as a character actor and a comeback kid, a perception fed by well received performances in The Upside of Anger and Open Range.

Now however, as he tries to reclaim leading man status; Costner is once again flailing. First, there was the disastrous Rumor Has It, a pseudo sequel to The Graduate with Costner as a middle aged Ben Braddock. Now comes Mr. Brooks a disaster of a different kind, one that isn't really Costner's fault.

"The Hunger has returned to Mr. Brooks, it never really left"

That is the opening title card to the new thriller Mr. Brooks, a title card that thrusts us into the midst of the madness of a man named Earl Brooks (Kevin Costner). Earl is a proud father, a loyal husband and a respected businessman who runs a major box company. However, in his spare time he is the thumbprint killer, a maniac who likes to pose his victims after killing them and then get off over the photos he takes.

He has been at this for years and for years has been careful to not get caught. He even managed to stop killing for 2 whole years with the help of  weekly A.A meetings, though alcohol never played a part in his compulsion. Then the hunger returned and he selected a pair of victims. Unfortunately, he wasn't as careful as he used to be. He left the curtains open and across the street, an amateur cameraman saw him commit murder.

Luckily for Mr. Brooks the cameraman, call him Mr. Smith (Dane Cook), is a sick puppy like himself. Smith doesn't want to turn Brooks over to the cops, rather he wants to learn from Mr. Brooks, he wants to kill. Thus sets up an uncomfortable partnership between the steely, calculating Mr. Brooks and the unnerved novice Mr. Smith.

That is just one of several plots running concurrently in this rather misguided take on the Dr. Jekyll, Mr Hyde mythos. Also jammed into this plot is a backstory and sub-storyline for Demi Moore as the cop investigating the thumbprint killer and another different killer and a credulity stretching plot for Danielle Panabaker as Mr. Brooks' daughter who may have inherited the serial killer gene.

A glance at director Bruce A. Evans' resume offers a few clues as to why Mr. Brooks  turned out so goofy. Evans wrote the lauded screenplays for epics like Cutthroat Island, Jungle 2 Jungle and Kuffs, a Christian Slater guilty pleasure that he also directed. Curiously, Evans hasn't directed since Kuffs. Maybe he was waiting for something that could match the goofball pleasures and squirm inducing discomfort of that early nineties crime comedy.

Mr. Brooks is certainly goofy but it's not supposed to be. It's intended to be a thriller but thrills are in short supply compared to the unintentional laughter induced by some of the bizarre choices made. There are more than a few moments of unintended humor such as watching comic Dane Cook attempt to appear credible as an actor opposite the veteran Costner. The disdainful glare of Costner's Mr. Brooks towards Cook's Mr. Smith plays like Costner's silent commentary on his co-star.

Despite the loopy plots and unintentional humor there are a few honest pleasures in Mr. Brooks, not least of which is the chemistry between Kevin Costner and William Hurt. These two veteran actors are so in sync and so on the money that you hate the movie for the constant interruptions of their interplay. Taking time out for Demi Moore's lame backstory and a search for another serial killer aside from Mr. Brooks and the daughter's story and Dane Cook's story all serve to upstage the film's one and only asset, the Costner-Hurt duo.

In the few moments that Costner and Hurt get to play we actually get to dig into Mr. Brooks' character and find out how he ticks and why he does what he does. The potential is there for a very unique take on the classic serial killer picture, a movie from the killer's perspective. Few killers are as uniquely villainous as Mr. Brooks, the upstanding businessman and father who happens to be a serial killer.

What a waste, Mr. Brooks had all sorts of potential and wasted it all on dopey, distracting subplots. Director and co-writer Bruce A. Evans is not a bad director really, just inexperienced with a seeming lack of confidence. Evans lacked the courage to jettison what was clearly not working and focus things where they were working, with Kevin Costner and William Hurt riffing and roaring.

Oh, what might have been.

Movie Review Good Luck Chuck

Good Luck Chuck (2007) 

Directed by Mark Helfrich 

Written by Josh Stolberg 

Starring Dane Cook, Jessica Alba, Dan Fogler 

Release Date September 21st, 2007 

Published September 20th, 2007 

The appeal of comedian Dane Cook has eluded me. I have nothing against the wildly popular comic, I just don't see what's so funny. His stand up repertoire seems to consist of wild, Jim Carrey like gesticulations used to sell underwhelming, punchless punchlines. His physicality is entertaining insofar as mimes trapped in that glass box are entertaining; but for my money, his act isn't all that funny. That's not even considering accusations that the unfunny jokes he tells are stolen from other comics. 

As for Cook's movie career, thus far, it's not quite as funny as his stand up career. His debut, in a starring role, in last fall's Employee Of The Month, was a bland, forgettable romantic comedy with the acting challenged Cook playing off the even more challenged Jessica Simpson. Now, for Cook's latest starring effort, after he tanked in a dramatic role opposite Kevin Costner in Mr. Brooks this past summer, Cook upgrades his romantic partner and still delivers a bland and forgettable effort. Starring opposite the endlessly appealing Jessica Alba, the appeal of Dane Cook continues to baffle the mind in Good Luck Chuck.

Charlie (Dane Cook) has never had trouble meeting women. Staying in a relationship however, has been mission impossible. The odd thing about the end of Charlie's relationships? His ex's always seem to marry the next guy they meet. It happens every time and women are beginning to take notice. A posting on the internet about Charlie the good luck charm turns the serially single Charlie into the most sought after stud in his area code.

Is this newfound appeal a blessing or a curse? Charlie's lecherous pal Stu (Dan Fogler) thinks it's the greatest thing ever. Charlie however, finds it to be a burden, especially when he meets Cam (Jessica Alba) who proves to be the girl of his dreams. Unfortunately, if the curse is real and he sleeps with her he could lose her forever; should she meet someone else.

That is a clean description of a plot that is in reality quite ugly and at times even mean spirited. Mark Helfrich, in his directorial debut, attempts to pull off what Judd Apatow and his creative team did with The 40 Year Old Virgin and Knocked Up. What is lacking is just about everything that made those two films so ingenious, daring and lovable.

Both Virgin and Knocked Up featured outlandish low humor that some might find off putting. Each film overcame that obstacle by giving the characters equal amounts of heart and humor to offset the raunch. Good Luck Chuck is mostly heartless with only one character we really give a damn about, Alba's Cam is an oasis in a desert of bad. Charlie, or Chuck from the title, isn't exactly detestable but there is very little appealing about him as he launches into a series of heartless sexual escapades to prove or disprove his curse.

The attempt to justify Chuck/Charlie's behavior by giving it the noble purpose of helping lonely girls take advantage of the curse to then meet their true love fails due to the film's vanity. All but two of Charlie's partners are models whose appearance in the film are not meant to propel this plot. Rather, they are used for the prurient purpose of having them get naked and keep the guys in the audience from nodding off.

The two other women, the ones who don't generally meet societal standards of beauty, are used as comic fodder in mean-spirited jokes at their expense. Only a movie as heartless as Good Luck Chuck could think that mocking these poor desperate characters could be a source of humor. An attempt to keep one of the encounters from being completely heartless and mean fails miserably and comes off not only mean but fake and insulting of both the character in question and those of us in the audience.

Dan Fogler is a Tony Award winning actor. I mention this because it kind of blows my mind. How can an actor be so successful in one medium and so remarkably unappealing and unfunny in a different medium. On stage, Fogler is a comic dynamo beloved by audiences. In movies, Fogler is an embarrassment, a remarkably unfunny presence. In his first starring role, the ping pong comedy, Balls of Fury, Fogler was utterly repellent. In good Luck Chuck, in a smaller, supporting role, he manages to somehow be even less appealing. 

As Stu, Charlie's misogynist best friend, Fogler is a breast obsessed plastic surgeon whose hobbies include masturbating into a grapefruit and worshiping the breast implants of Pamela Anderson which he purchased on Ebay. Why anyone thought this character was funny is beyond me. Jonah Hill portrayed a raunchy over the top character in Knocked Up but Hill did it with a charming and vulnerable quality that revealed how that character used vulgarity as a cover for insecurity. There is zero nuance in Fogler's performance in Good Luck Chuck, he's just a creep. 

Even as I was drifting out of Good Luck Chuck, when I wasn't actively being repulsed by it, I did see some moments where this story or this plot might have worked. Cut back on the prurience, strengthen the characters, and give more time to Jessica Alba's Cam, the only truly likable character in the film, and maybe you could rescue this movie from the garbage. That ship has sailed however and what we are left with is a mess of ugly misogyny, disturbing fetishes, and a lame and completely unbelievable  romance. 

Good Luck Chuck makes Adam Sandler's style of humor look good by comparison.