Classic Movie Review Horror of Dracula

Horror of Dracula (1958) 

Directed by Terence Fisher 

Written by Jimmy Sangster 

Starring Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, Michael Gough 

Release Date May 7th 1958 

Published April 25th, 2024 

If you're going to talk about Dracula and sexuality, you're not going to start with Bela Lugosi. Lugosi's monster may have sexual overtones, Dracula has always been a metaphor for sex, often a symbol of non-consensual sex or used as a fetish figure who represents male sexual dominance or merely a figure representing the seductive nature of taking power over others. But, Bela Lugosi isn't hot. He's not a bad looking dude, per se, but there are few if any people who look at Bela Lugosi and are overcome with a form of erotomania. 

On the other hand, Christopher Lee has that going on. Though he is unconventionally attractive, he has a towering, powerful presence. Lee's eyes appear to be devouring those he's looking at. His every action, every look on his face is filled with a confident, overbearing sense of his own sexual prowess. In the most crass and basic sense, Lee's Count Dracula is a Dracula who F***s. Lugosi's approach was more asexual, leaning on his desire for power over others to be his driving dramatic force. For Lee, and even more prominently, Gary Oldman in Bram Stoker's Dracula, the driving force is eroticism, it's metaphoric sex. The desire for blood is both for sustaining life comfortably and about a forceful sexuality barely concealed. 

1958's Horror of Dracula is a showcase for Christopher Lee's overwhelming presence. It's about those eyes that bore into yours. It's about him looking down at his victims and them looking up at him to subtly and not-so-subtly underline the power fantasy and dynamic at play in Lee's take on the character. Where Max Schreck's Nosferatu is like an incel take on Vampire lore, Lee's Dracula is like a proto-Andrew Tate or one of those pick up artist guys constantly touting their power over women, and sometimes men. Lee's Dracula isn't about murder, he doesn't actually kill the women he covets, he turns them. His intent is keep them and use them against their will for his pleasure, that's his kink. 

Making a woman do something she doesn't want to do. That's the driving force of Lee's Dracula and it's bizarre how that parallels with our modern culture of Alpha Males. The Alpha Males often talk about the power they wish to wield over women. It's about bending a woman to that will, getting them to submit to what the man wants in a relationship, it's their fetish, just as it is Dracula's fetish in Horror of Dracula and as portrayed by Christopher Lee. It's not about blood or murder, it's kink. It's a power fantasy and an appealing one for the Alpha Male types as they could never achieve this kind of control over women, but they can live vicariously through Lee's Dracula. 

The proof of my thesis about Alpha Males and their kink, their fetish for power, comes in an unlikely form, a woman named Pearl. Every now and then, a podcaster named Pearl goes viral for something she said or something that someone said about her. Pearl is often called a 'Pick Me,' a woman who is eager to submit to a male dominated hierarchy. Pearl has talked many times about how women have too many rights and claims that women are happier when they simply submit to the desires of a man. You might assume that the Alpha Males applaud Pearl and are eager to find a woman just like her, but that's not the case. 

Find my full length review at Horror.Media 

Horror in the 90s Gremlins 2

Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990) 

Directed by Joe Dante 

Written by Charles Haas

Starring Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates, John Glover, Robert Picardo, Christopher Lee 

Release Date June 15th, 1990 

Box Office $41.5 million dollars 

I'm convinced that the only cultural reputation that Gremlins 2: The New Batch has comes entirely from the cache earned from Key & Peele. The brilliant minds of Keegan Michael Key and Jordan Peele performed a sketch on their Comedy Central series in which Peele as a Hollywood Sequel Doctor, played by a flamboyant Jordan Peele, enters the writers room for Gremlins 2 and proceeds to take suggestions for wild ideas to add to the Gremlins 2 story. What he comes up with are actual characters from Gremlins 2 that are so outlandish and dumb that they seem to have been made up. It's a brilliant sketch but it sets a standard that the movie simply cannot match. 

As wild as this Hollywood Script Doctors ideas for Gremlins 2: The New Batch are, the movie never feels that wild or outrageous. Instead, it feels deeply disjointed, often desperate, and unfunny. Gremlins 2: The New Batch has the feel of a sequel that was thrust upon director Joe Dante who responded to the burden by trying to sabotage his own movie. Dante comes up with several bad ideas, executes them poorly, and delivered a final cut that I can only imagine left everyone mortified but unable to not release the movie. Trying to cull a plot description together seems like a fool's errand but here we are. 

Gremlins 2: The New Batch returns Zach Galligan as everyman Bill Pelzer. Billy is now working and living in New York City with his small town gal-pal, Kate, played by an also returning Phoebe Cates. Also having moved to New York City is Gizmo, the cutest of the Gremlins. How and why Gizmo is now in New York City is a plot contrivance. He's needed in New York for this dimwitted plot to unfold. A Trump like developer named Daniel Clamp (John Glover) is eager to buy the shop owned by Mr. Wing, a returning Keye Luke, so he can continue to reshape the New York skyline in his tacky image. 

When Mr. Wing dies, Clamp gets his wish and Gizmo is left homeless. By coincidence, Gizmo is found by a pair of twin scientists who work for Daniel Clamp's top scientist, played in utterly bizarre fashion by Christopher Lee. He's eager to experiment on Gizmo but a further series of coincidences, including Billy happening to work in this building and offhandedly hearing about the cute creature in an upstairs lab, leads to a Billy/Gizmo reunion. Naturally, things go off the rails pretty quickly as Gizmo gets wet from a malfunctioning water fountain and dozens of new Gremlins are born and wreck havoc. 

Not a single one of the new Gremlins, who use the chemicals in Christopher Lee's lab to genetically alter themselves to vary the species design, are funny. A Gremlin with Spider Legs is a pretty good horror visual but since Gremlins 2 is clumsily straddling the line between horror and family friendly, kid friendly, comedy, the horror elements are drearily watered down. That all of the Gremlins described in the Key & Peele sketch are indeed real provides a semblance of fun but that's coming from the absurdity of Key& Peele's comedy magic and nothing that the movie is doing. 

Read the full length review at Horror.Media 

Movie Review: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005) 

Directed by Tim Burton

Written by John August

Starring Johnny Depp, Freddie Highmore, David Kelly, Helena Bonham Carter, Noah Taylor, Christopher Lee

Release Date July 15th, 2005 

Published July 15th, 2005 

Streaming on HBO Max

The first time Roald Dahl's childhood dreamscape Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was brought to the big screen, under the title Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, the film became a beloved children's classic based on the gentle whimsy of Gene Wilder's cyanide-laced wit as Willy. However, writer Roald Dahl was never a fan of this adaptation.

The legendary writer passed on before another adaptation could be taken up. According to his wife Liccy, the latest adaptation, with the original book title, by director Tim Burton, is a version that Mr. Dahl himself would have embraced. We will never know for sure. What we do know is that Mr. Burton's version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a visionary and astonishing work of art from the set design to the music and the amazing work of one of our finest actors, Johnny Depp.

Willy Wonka's (Johnny Depp) chocolate factory in the center of London has been a source of mystery and wonder ever since Wonka fired all of his employees some years ago and shuttered the factory. When one day it reopened without hiring any new employees the mystery deepened. Now finally after years of being a shut in, Wonka has decided to allow five children to visit his factory. By finding a golden ticket inside a Wonka chocolate bar, five kids will have the adventure of a lifetime inside the legendary candy factory.

One of the children who prays for the opportunity to go to the factory is one Charlie Bucket (Freddie Highmore). Charlie lives in a ramshackle flat with an unintentional skylight above his bed. His bedridden grandparents (David Kelly, Liz Smith, David Morris, and Eileen Essell) take up most of the living room and we are never quite sure where Charlie's mom and dad (Helena Bonham Carter and Noah Taylor) sleep. Still the family is quite chipper given the circumstances.

Charlie, however, seems the least likely child to get the chance to capture a golden ticket. Charlie gets one chocolate bar a year on his birthday, essentially a one in a million chance. Things look especially hopeless after the first four tickets are discovered across the globe by over-privileged little brats who buy in bulk or crack the system for the chance at a ticket.

There is Veruca Salt (Julia Winter), a terribly spoiled little girl whose father (James Fox) gets her whatever she demands no matter what the price. Violet Beauregard (Annasophia Robb) is a vainglorious little brat whose mother also buys in bulk to get her daughter a ticket, despite the fact that neither actually eats chocolate. Augustus Gloop (Philip Weirgatz) is a plump little German boy who stumbled on his ticket only after taking a bite out of it. Finally we have a venal, little twit named Mike Teavee who discovers his ticket via the internet and his hacking abilities, one of many subtle updates of the source material.

Well of course Charlie Bucket does get his golden ticket and he and his Grandpa Joe (Kelly) are off to the mysterious factory where Joe once worked when it had employees. Inside is a magical world of wondrous candied delights. Mr. Wonka is a bit of a nutball-- an effete dilettante who, despite his child friendly products and his invitation to children to visit, doesn't seem to like children at all.

As the tour commences, the strange surroundings evolve into even stranger situations as one child after another falls victim to their excesses, each child disappearing with a Greek chorus of Wonka's new employees playing them off. These oddball new workers who have helped Willy restore the factory are Oompa Loompas, a tribe of identical individuals all played by the astonishingly deadpan actor Deep Roy.

The child actors are very well cast, especially young Freddie Highmore as Charlie. Highmore caught Mr. Depp's eye as one of the child cast of his Finding Neverland. Highmore was Oscar-worthy as the youngest of the children that inspired the writing of the children's classic Peter Pan in Finding Neverland. In Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, his bright, crooked smile and boundless enthusiasm is the perfect complement to Depp's weirdness and the loving and beautiful performance of David Kelly as Grandpa Joe.

Then there is the ethereal Deep Roy as all of the Oompa Loompas. A wonderful change from the creepy looking green elves of the 1971 film, Roy has a detached air that seems perfectly at home in the weird universe of Willy Wonka. The curious little song and dance routines of the Oompa Loompas that somehow match perfectly with the actions of what just occurred to their child subjects in the story are wildly entertaining and yet just a little creepy. Oscar nominated composer Danny Elfman wrote and sings each of the songs but it is Roy's dry, deadpan dance numbers that raise the music to hilarious comic levels.

Director Tim Burton disappointed slightly with his melodramatic fantasy Big Fish, but returns to artistic form with Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, a visual masterpiece like nothing Burton has ever created. It seems that having a good story to start with allowed Burton to focus all of his energies on creating a brand new universe for this well known story. His accomplishment is breathtaking in every detail and production designer Alex McDowell can begin prepping his acceptance speech.

Never having read Mr. Dahl's book I cannot speak to the faithfulness of Mr. Burton's film, though as I said earlier, Mr. Dahl's wife, Liccy, who is credited as producer on the film, claims he would have been pleased. We do know that Mr. Burton and screenwriter John August (Big Fish, Go) did add one subplot that may become an essential part of the Wonka lore.

Burton and August create a backstory for Willy Wonka, a glimpse of his childhood and what led a seemingly normal kid to build a strange and very unique candy paradise. The backstory includes a stellar cameo by the legendary Christopher Lee and deepens the character of Willy Wonka, taking us beyond his simple weirdness.

The essential element of making the character of Willy Wonka work is not on the page. Johnny Depp, in a performance that is as winning as his Captain Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Carribean, creates a Willy Wonka that is earnest, deeply sincere and a little disturbed, but also quite savvy. His reasons for finally opening the factory to visitors are reasonable and intelligent with just a hint of overreaction. He has a sharp wit combined with the defensiveness of a small child. It is a multi-layered and wonderfully crafted performance.

While many critics lazily point out things they believe are inspired by the weirdness of Michael Jackson, a more active viewer will sense something far more original and brilliant. Completely at odds with the glib wittiness of Gene Wilder's take on the character, Mr. Depp takes the character in a direction that has more connection to his own Edward Scissorhands than with MJ or Mr. Wilder.

Charlie and The Chocolate Factory is a joy for children of all ages. Even diehard fans of 1971's Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory will not be able to deny the wonderful artistry of this re-imagining. There is talk of Burton adapting the Charlie sequel Charlie and The Great Glass Elevator. I'm normally not one to encourage a sequel but if it can be promised to be as brilliant as Charlie and the Chocolate Factory I will line up for my golden ticket right now.

Movie Review Season of the Witch

Season of the Witch (2011) 

Directed by Dominic Sena 

Written by Bragi F. Schut

Starring Nicolas Cage, Ron Perlman, Claire Foy, Stephen Graham, Christopher Lee

Release Date January 7th, 2011 

Published January 7th, 2011 

Nicolas Cage has made some seriously awful movies, like Fire Birds, Bangkok Dangerous or Knowing. Despite the quality of his films though, Nicholas Cage has never been boring, until now. Season of the Witch is Nicolas Cage being boring. As a noble, god fearing Knight on a quest to save a village from an allegedly plague inducing witch, Nicolas Cage offers a stalwart hero so tediously heroic that nothing stands out about him.

Behman (Cage) and his loyal pal Felson (Ron Perlman, Hellboy) have been fighting on behalf of the church in the crusades for more than a decade when suddenly killing the innocent loses its taste. Abandoning their duty, the two set off for freedom but are waylaid at a village overcome by the plague. Found guilty of desertion, Behman and Felson are offered a choice; death by hanging or a Knightly quest. Not hard to guess that choice.

The quest has the Knights, along with a priest, a con man, a teenager and a widower, transporting ‘The Girl’ (Claire Foy), who is suspected of being a Witch, to a monastery where she is to be executed. Behman however, pledges that ‘The Girl’ will not be harmed unless she actually is a Witch, something that the priest, the Widower and the Con Man, simply cannot abide. In short order they will try to kill the Witch and face a dastardly fate. But, is it Witchcraft or worse?

The idea of Nicolas Cage, underneath yet another one of his famously odd hairdos, playing a 13th century Knight battling a Witch and a corrupt Church would seem to have potential for some classic Nicolas Cage weirdness yet somehow it never comes. Sure, Cage and Ron Perlman‘s casting alone, along with Dominic Sena‘s ludicrous modern action beats against a 13th Century background, are odd in their own right but Cage plays Behman with such stalwart, heroic intensity that he seems stunningly normal under the circumstances.

Cage plays Behman just as any other actor without Cage’s flair might have played him. Viggo Mortenson or Keanu Reeves could have played Behman and given just the same stolid yet gallant performance. Where is the weirdness? Where is that extra something behind the eye that makes Nicholas Cage unique? It’s shocking and disappointing to watch Nicolas Cage play a hero whose eyes aren’t bugged out and ready to leap from his fiery skull and instead are sleepily focused and determined.

If Season of the Witch wanted to be just another action movie the makers could have hired any other actor. They hired Nicolas Cage to bring the weird. It’s fair, in fact, to wonder if director Dominic Sena, who watched Cage bring the weird to his car junkie action flick Gone in Sixty Seconds, was also waiting for his star to emerge and thus ended up making a dull, straight arrow action movie when he had hoped he was making a Nicholas Cage movie.

Would weirdo Nicolas Cage make Season of the Witch a good movie? Likely not but, Nicolas Cage in a bad movie is at the very least always interesting. There is always so much to see when Nicolas Cage finds that odd beat he wants to play. In Peggy Sue Got Married Cage adopted a voice he compared to Gumby’s pal Pokey and nearly got himself fired because he wouldn’t drop the voice. In other films he channels Elvis Presley for reasons only he understands.

It’s weird and it can ruin a movie but it’s always intriguing as we search Cage’s face and manner for that little inflection, that idea that struck only him and reveals his fascination with a role. Sadly, in Season of the Witch that little flavor of Nicholas Cage, that revealing little tick or inflection, that idea that is solely his never emerges and instead we have a bored Nicolas Cage delivering a boring performance in a boring movie.

Movie Review Star Wars Episode Two Attack of the Clones

Star Wars Episode II Attack of the Clones (2002) 

Directed by George Lucas 

Written by George Lucas 

Starring Ewan McGregor, Hayden Christensen, Samuel L. Jackson, Natalie Portman, Christopher Lee, Ian McDiarmid, Frank Oz, Joel Edgerton, Anthony Daniels, Kenny Baker 

Release Date May 16th. 2002 

Published May 16th, 2002  

Did you like The Phantom Menace? I thought I did but when I watched it, to prepare for Episode 2, cracks began to show. Where I once actually attempted to defend Jar Jar Binks, I now see how completely indefensible the character is. On the 12th viewing, Phantom Menace doesn't hold up. The film was efficiently crafted but lacked a soul. Episode 2: Attack of the Clones is also efficiently crafted but like Phantom Menace it too lacks a soul.

We rejoin the story as Senator Padme Amidala, the former queen of Naboo, arrives for an important vote on the formation of an army of the republic, an idea she is uncertain about. Upon her arrival there is an assassination attempt. Amidala survives and is put under the protection of Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor) and Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen). While Obi-Wan is assigned to hunt the bounty hunter who orchestrated the assassination attempt, Anakin is told to escort Amidala back to Naboo and keep her safe.

The setup is a little obvious but then Lucas merely uses characters as transitory figures in between awe-inspiring effects. So now Anakin and Amidala are alone and as we already know they fall in love. The inevitability of their relationship takes away from the love story, but not nearly as much as Christensen and Portman's lack of chemistry and Lucas's quickest way to get the point across scripting.

Christensen isn't bad but he's not great. Rather than communicating the tortured soul that would lead to the dark side, Christensen communicates, for the most part, with whining and crying. Christensen played a similarly whiny and tiresome character in last year's Life as A House, and at this rate it is difficult to envision him improving much beyond what we've seen. 

Natalie Portman also isn't very good at all in AOTC. Whereas in Phantom Menace Amidala had courage and intelligence, now Amidala has become full of angst and moony eyes over Anakin. Also, the fact that Amidala looks as if she hasn't aged is an unavoidable criticism. Ewan Mcgregor and Samuel L. Jackson are strong but are let down greatly by Lucas's transitory script which forgoes wit and intelligence in favor of spiritual platitude and dull transitions from special effect to special effect.

Of course, Attack of The Clones isn't about dialogue and characters, it's about action and, in that aspect, it doesn't disappoint. The special effects are spectacular, and while I still prefer real sets and actors, Lucas has done a remarkable job of creating a whole universe almost without them. The special effects give the film an epic feel, especially the many landscapes of Tatooine, Coruscant and Naboo that are fully realized places made from absolutely nothing.

Of course, the scene that will get people through the door is Yoda's fight scene. At the showing I attended Yoda's CGI confrontation with Christopher Lee's Count Dooku elicited loud cheers from the audience. I couldn't help but to get caught up a little myself.

AOTC isn't bad but it seems like two plus hours of exposition for the far more interesting Episode 3, the episode that completes Anakin Skywalker's transformation into Darth Vader. And while I would like to have seen better acting and dialogue, I have a feeling George is saving the really good stuff for the next film.

Movie Review: The Lord of the Rings The Fellowship of The Ring

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001) 

Directed by Peter Jackson

Written by Peter Jackson, Phillipa Boyens, Fran Walsh 

Starring Elijah Wood, Ian Holm, Ian McKellan, Christopher Lee, Viggo Mortensen, Liv Tyler 

Release Date December 10th, 2001 

Published December 9th, 2001

For the first time in a long while I was able to walk into a theater with almost no knowledge of the film I was about to see. The trailers were merely teasers that didn't giveaway anything of the story, I've never read the book on which the film is based and I read no reviews of the film before seeing it. Yet the film I saw is one of the more hyped films of all time, The Lord Of the Rings Fellowship of The Ring. You're wondering how I was able to avoid learning about LOTR and what it was about. I assure you it wasn't a calculated effort. The books never appealed to me, I did know a little something about hobbits, Middle earth and fairies, but beyond that the film was entirely new to me.

Fellowship is the first in a three picture series in the Lord of the Rings trilogy. It introduces the story of Frodo Baggins (Elijah Wood), who inherits a powerful and mysterious ring from his uncle, Bilbo Baggins (Ian Holm). Frodo has no idea what the ring does but is quickly clued in by the friendly wizard Gandalf (Ian Mckellen), who explains the ring's origin and that of its owner and controller, the evil Lord Sauron. The Ring, we are told, has the power to enslave all of Middle earth; thus it must be destroyed. A fellowship of 9 made up of elves, men, dwarves and hobbits must destroy the ring by returning it to the fires of Mount Doom. Oh if it were only that easy. Sauron is also searching for the ring with his allies the Orcs, and the powerful wizard Samuron (Christopher Lee) who is building an army to stop the intruders.

If you think I'm simplifying too much I'm sorry, I'm just trying to get to my point. It's been a while since we've seen such a pure good vs. evil story, I in fact thought that irony may have destroyed Hollywood's ability to tell such a story without having characters that are overly flawed and quirky. In any other action movie, Frodo would have a drinking problem or an ex-wife who complains about child support and he would make wisecracks before dispatching a villain while each of his emotions were underscored by some pop classic. Yes in that sense LOTR is a breath of fresh air.

Elijah Wood will never be confused with your average adventure hero. His Frodo Baggins is tiny and frightened and certainly not predisposed to violence. Instead, he's pretty good at running and hiding, which he does a lot of. Don't be mistaken, Wood doesn't play Frodo as a coward, he's realistic. He knows he's not a fighter and leaves the warrior stuff to the warriors. Viggo Mortensen is the true standout in the very large cast that also includes Liv Tyler, Cate Blanchett and Hugo Weaving. Mortensen shows some charisma and energy in Fellowship that I had not seen from him before. Here he tears into his character and allows his emotions to carry his words and he's very effective. Lord of the Rings is an epic adventure of great scale and scope. Give director Peter Jackson a lot of credit, he has created an entirely new world onscreen. He brings it to life with amazing visual flourish yet doesn't allow the film to get buried underneath it's special effects, which is quite a delicate balancing act.

Comparisons to Star Wars are warranted. The character's motivations and the action-before-dialogue style are quite reminiscent of the George Lucas creation. Character development takes a backseat to visual artistry and the latest in SFX and CGI technology. Although I prefer more character driven styles, action adventures if done well can be almost as entertaining and Lord of the Rings is very well done. 

Sidenote: Am I the only one who thought Christopher Lee looked like Osama Bin Laden? It was probably just the beard, but his first close-up was somewhat jarring.