Movie Review: Fantastic Beasts The Crimes of Grindlewald

Fantastic Beast The Crimes of Grindelwald (2018) 

Directed by David Yates 

Written by J.K Rowling 

Starring Eddie Redmayne, Dan Fogler, Johnny Depp, Ezra Miller, Zoe Kravitz, Katherine Waterston

Release Date November 16th, 2018 

Published November 16th, 2018 

Fantastic Beasts The Crimes of Grindelwald is some of the most fun I have had at the movies this year. This delightful entry in the Harry Potter universe brims with life and love and vitality. The script by author J.K Rowling weaves a wonderful mystery while also giving space for these wonderful characters to exist for us to enjoy as if they were brand new again. David Yates’ expert direction brings it all together in one magical package.

Fantastic Beasts The Crimes of Grindelwald opens with a harrowing escape from magical jail. The villainous Grindelwald (Johnny Depp) is set to be returned to London from New York City where he’d been captured and unmasked in 2016’s Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. Despite having his ability to speak taken from him, Grindelwald uses his incredible powers of persuasion to convince one of his prison guards to take his place.

Once Grindelwald is on the loose the chase is on to locate Credence Barebone (Ezra Miller). Everyone in the wizarding world wants to find Creedence because his power may be unmatched by any other wizard and having him on your side could be the difference maker in the coming war between pure blood wizards led by Grindelwald and those who wish to live in peace with the Non-Magical world, led by the legendary Albus Dumbledore (Jude Law).

Caught in the middle is our hero, Newt Scamander (Eddie Redmayne). While he certainly doesn’t side with Grindelwald, Newt would prefer not to have to fight anyone. Newt is content to live in peace while collecting his magical beasts and making sure they are cared for and not hunted or harmed. Unfortunately, the Ministry of Magic won’t let Newt travel legally in the magical world unless he agrees to help hunt down Creedence and Grindelwald.

Newt eventually gets drawn into the search for Creedence while he is searching for Tina (Katherine Waterston). Tina and Newt split at the end of the last film over her working as an Aura for the Ministry and his desire to remain apart from those in power. Now, he’s seeking her again to tell her how much he misses her. Joining Newt once again is his pal Jacob (Dan Fogler) whose memory was restored by Queenie (Alison Sudol) and the two are in love, though banned from being able to marry by the restrictive rules of the Ministry.

The race to find Creedence is also a race by Creedence to discover the secret of his true identity which he feels will be key in helping him find his place in the world. All sides want to tell him who he is but who can he actually believe? It’s a terrific mystery with plenty of unexpected twists and turns. Ezra Miller doesn’t have much to play beyond hurt and confusion but I enjoyed how this mystery and the misdirections around it drove the plot.

Despite a few awkward moments, I found myself completely wrapped up in Fantastic Beasts The Crimes of Grindelwald. I really enjoy the universe that J.K Rowling and director David Yates are revealing ever so carefully. Yes, the mythology is dense, especially the nods back to the Harry Potter franchise, and that can be daunting for some but for me, the film stood alone and didn’t spend a lot of time explaining or underlining anything for comic effect, a trap that sequels in this genre tend to fall into.

I found Fantastic Beasts The Crimes of Grindelwald to be delightful, an adventure and mystery with magic and romance and suspense. The ending even has some tragic qualities that echo some of the great hero journey’s like those of Star Wars. No joke, in interviews, actor Dan Fogler has referred to The Crimes of Grindelwald as the Empire Strikes Back of this franchise and he’s not wrong. The comparison is fair and genuine, both films have the quality of mixing tragic and triumphant moments.

I don’t know what I was expecting from Fantastic Beasts The Crimes of Grindelwald but I surely wasn’t expecting to be as moved as I was by the movie. I wasn’t in tears by the end but I was affected, I cared about what happened and I cannot wait to see how this plays out in the next movie. It was a delight to be so enthralled with a big budget blockbuster, one I could allow to enfold me and bring me fully into another world. This movie did that for me, I believed in this magical world from beginning to end.

Fantastic Beasts The Crimes of Grindelwald isn’t a flawless masterpiece by any stretch but by the standards of the genre, young adult adventure, it’s top notch stuff. This is some of the best young adult adventure going today. Fantastic Beasts and The Crimes of Grindelwald wildly imaginative and ingenious. The characters are wonderful and irresistibly charming. Even Johnny Depp’s appearance couldn’t ruin the movie which is so good, I forgot Depp was even there and just anticipated seeing his character get what was coming to him. Whether that happened or not I will leave you to discover.

When I interviewed Dan Fogler recently, he told me that there are still 5 more movies to go in this franchise. If they can maintain this high level of quality presentation, I am all in for 5 more movies from these incredible writers and directors.

Movie Review Love Happens

Love Happens (2009)

Directed by Brandon Camp

Written by Brandon Camp, Mike Thompson

Starring Aaron Eckhart, Jennifer Aniston, Dan Fogler, Judy Greer, Martin Sheen

Release Date September 18th, 2009 

Published September 18th, 2009 

Is there possibly a less passion inspiring romance title than Love Happens? Love eh? Love Ensues? Love Stumbled Upon? If only the low watt title were the film's biggest problem. Oh no. Love Happens is riddled with troubles. Quirk ridden stand ins where characters should. A storyline as predictable as sunrise. And then there is a damn bird.

Aaron Eckhart stars in Love Happens as self help guru Burke Ryan. He's Dr. Phil but handsome. Burke lost his wife 3 years ago in a car accident which led to him writing a book about living with loss. Now he travels the country with his faithful sidekick (Dan Fogler), performing workshops to help people cope with loss.

Finding himself back in the city where his wife died, Seattle, Burke is looking to get in and get out before his past catches up with him. Literally while he isn't looking, Burke stumbles upon Eloise, a flower shop owner with one weird quirk on top of another. She likes to write obscure words on walls behind paintings in hotel hallways. (I said it was a weird quirk).

He is smitten immediately but she blows him by pretending to be a mute. Her ruse doesn't hold up and their next encounter is an argument. An argument that of course means they are destined to fall in love. Destined though they may be they first must be kept apart and a predictable secret from his past is supplied solely for the purpose of keeping them at a distance.

Don't worry, I won't spoil the big reveal of Burke's secret, the movie will do that in the first 5 to 10 minutes. Anyone who has seen movies like Sweet November or Return To Me or really any similarly hoary cliched romance won't need a map to find this ending well before it arrives for the characters.

It is the nature of a romantic comedy to be a little predictable, not many end with the lovers parting ways. Thus, these movies are more about the journey than the destination. Unfortunately, this is one lame journey. One that feels twice as long as it really is.

Brandon Camp is a first time director whose experience is mostly in TV drama. His roots likely contribute to the episodic, disjointed storytelling that devotes a good deal of time to filler material to pad itself out beyond what might have been better suited to something of 44 minutes plus commercials.

Most egregious of the filler material is a subplot involving a man who lost his little boy and attends Burke's seminar. While we are supposed to like Burke the film keeps making him out as a shyster. Then he alternately attempts to help and rip off this pained father, effectively portrayed by John Carroll Lynch, in serious scenes sandwiched between goofball romance scenes.

Love Happens has about as much consistency in tone as it does energy in that stupid title. One minute we are in the midst of both characters in a wacky moment. Next we are watching people who have lost a family member be taken in by a shyster who is supposed to be our hero.

Wow, what a mess this movie is. From the bizarre maudlin subplots to the lame secret right down to the two main characters who aren't so much characters as a collection of traits given to Eckhardt and Aniston to drop in as they wish. She likes writing on walls. He's afraid of elevators. She keeps copies of other people's love notes. He might be an alcoholic.

Not one of these traits has any kind of payoff, at least not one that makes any difference to the main plot. The traits exist only to give the actors something to do in between the bouts of mind-numbingly awful dialogue that includes not just 'when life gives you lemons....' but also 'if you love something, set it free'. Ugh.

And then there is the damn bird. Folks, if you are a member of PETA you will want to skip Love Happens. The bird goes unharmed, for the most part but its treatment in the film is beyond idiotic. Worse, it assumes that we in the audience are just as dumb as the movie.

Love Happens is an abysmal bit of treacle aimed at the soft hearted and softer headed. Not even the uncontainable charms of the wonderful Jennifer Aniston can bring this treacle any more life than that shrug shouldered title, Love Happens.

Movie Review Mars Needs Moms

Mars Needs Moms (2011) 

Directed by Simon Wells

Written by Simon Wells

Starring Seth Green, Dan Fogler, Mindy Sterling, Joan Cusack

Release Date March 11th, 2011 

Published March 11th, 2011 

Motion Capture, or MoCap for you nerds out there, seems like a lot of extra work for little extra benefit. Take for instance the new movie “Mars Needs Moms” which employed actor Seth Green to portray the 11 year old protagonist only to realize as production began that Green, even attempting a voice, sounded nothing like an 11 year boy. This came after they hired Green, dressed him in a green screen jumpsuit and digitized his image as he acted out the role.

The lack of a proper voice forced the producers to hire a real 11 year old, actor Seth Robert Dusky, to provide the voice of the young protagonist Milo, meaning that the studio paid a premium for Seth Green to jump around in a digital costume, a price they could have cut in half had they simply hired an 11 year old to begin with or, if the role was too taxing for someone that young, hired a stuntman to simply handle the running, jumping and climbing the role required.

None of this would have been necessary at all had Imagemovers and Disney, the companies behind “Mars Needs Moms,” simply used traditional computer animation like the groundbreakers in Disney's own house at Pixar. Instead, millions of dollars were spent to deliver a movie that feels as disjointed and failing as the attempt to have Seth Green pretend to be 11 years old.

“Mars Needs Moms,” based on the popular children's book by Berkley Breathed, is the story of Milo who, after fighting with his mom, finds aliens in her bedroom as they are scampering out the window with mom as their prisoner. Giving chase, Milo finds himself swept up by the alien ship and eventually finds himself on Mars where the population of mostly women has been abducting Earth moms for years in an attempt to clone their parenting techniques.

After briefly being held prisoner himself, Milo is rescued by Gribble (voice of Dan Fogler, Balls of Fury), an overgrown child who claims to be an astronaut but actually has a story very much like Milo's. Gribble agrees to help Milo and they are soon joined by Ki (voice of Elizabeth Harnois), a Martian with a rebellious streak and a love of “flower power”

Together, these three misfits have to rescue Milo's mom (voice of Joan Cusack) from the nasty Supervisor (Mindy Sterling) before mom's memory is destroyed and implanted into a Martian robot.

There is a terrific story somewhere in “Mars Needs Moms.” The action has a strong motivation and the story plays out with a relatively precise logic. The problem is none of the movies are very entertaining. In attempting to give Mars a little grunge the filmmakers made the planet less interesting to look at; Milo and Gribble spend much time in an alien garbage pile which is as visually enticing as it sounds.

The humor of “Mars Needs Moms” is pitched to the ear of young kids who may chuckle here and there but there is not a memorable gut buster, even for the littlest of little ones, in all of “Mars Needs Moms.” This is a movie with a rather dramatic conceit about a boy losing his mom and fighting to get her back; you need a good sense of humor to pair with that or risk boring your core audience whose eyes and ears are yet to be tuned fully for drama.

Robert Zemecki has been trying to make Motion Capture his niche in the animated business, something to separate his brand from that of Pixar, Blue Sky Studios (“Ice Age”) and Dreamworks Animation (“Shrek,” “How to Train Your Dragon”). Unfortunately, three movies into his deal with Disney his company ImageMovers has been temporarily shuttered.

His “A Christmas Carol” was modestly profitable but at an extravagant cost the film was not a world beater at the box office. Now, “Mars Needs Moms” arrives to poor reviews and first weekend box office results that some say could be the worst cost to profit ratio in Hollywood history, barring a strong international rally.

Zemeckis’s insistence on Motion Capture was likely the death knell for “Mars Needs Moms,” a modest story that needed a more modest production if it needed to be made at all. The story simply doesn’t justify the effort involved and likely could have been produced for less than the reported 135 million dollars without all of the trappings and cost of Motion Capture.

It’s a moot point now of course, the film is out there and it has failed. ImageMovers has closed and Mr. Zemeckis hopes to relaunch it as a home for the adult themed, Beatles remake “Yellow Submarine” in 2012. It will likely be a long time before Disney or anyone else attempts another Motion Capture feature for kids like “Mars Needs Moms” and that is as much a commentary on this overwrought technology as it is on the minor pleasures provided by the story of “Mars Needs Moms.”

Movie Review: Balls of Fury

Balls of Fury (2007) 

Directed by Robert Ben Garant

Written by Thomas Lennon, Robert Ben Garant

Starring Dan Fogler, Christopher Walken, George Lopez, Maggie Q, Robert Patrick

Release Date August 29th, 2007

Published August 30th, 2007

Who is Dan Fogler? That is the question many who see the movie Balls of Fury will ask. Of course, most won't see Balls of Fury because they don't know who Dan Fogler is. Quite a conundrum. Nevertheless, Fogler is an acclaimed actor. He won a Tony award, Broadway's highest honor, for his work in the musical "The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee ''.How one goes from Broadway star to the star of a movie about ping pong is one of those curious quirks of Hollywood. Something linked Fogler to the guys from Reno 911, Ben Garant and Thomas Lennon, and thus they came to cast Fogler in their latest unfunny comedy Balls of Fury.

Ben Garant and Thomas Lennon are two of the creators of the often quite funny cops spoof Reno 911. However, their film work has been utterly atrocious. I've rundown the litany of their sins more than a few times and here they are again. The Pacifier, Taxi, Reno 911 Miami and Herbie Fully Loaded. Blech! Balls of Fury is as inept and misguided as any of those features.

The story begins at the 1988 olympics. 12 year old Randy Daytona (Dan Fogler) is America's hope for the gold in Ping Pong. Unfortunately, Randy gets beaten badly and embarrasses himself by knocking himself cold and proclaiming he was going to Disney World. Nearly 20 years later Randy is still playing ping pong, as a performer in a low class Vegas casino lunch room populated by the soon to the grave crowd.

There, Randy is approached by an FBI agent, Rodriguez (George Lopez), who explains that Randy is America's best chance to capture a legendary Chinese mafia figure known as Feng (Christopher Walken). Feng, it seems, is a ping pong aficionado and is holding an underground tournament for the best players in the world. Randy must get back in shape and with the help of ping pong guru (James Hong) and his smoking hot daughter Maggie (Maggie Q), prepare to play ping pong to the death.

Thomas Lennon and Ben Garant come from the world of sketch comedy and improv and you can see the influence of that in Balls of Fury. Sudden death ping pong is a good sketch comedy premise. Unfortunately, when stretched to the length of a feature film it wears thin quickly. You can see throughout Balls of Fury a number of unformed ideas that begin with the potential to be funny but peter out as the actors search for the punchline.

Dan Fogler is not a well known actor unless of course you are a fan of Broadway. The comic actor won a Tony Award for his work in "The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee". Of course few actors, even one with a Tony on his resume, could make this material work. Fogler's co-stars Maggie Q and George Lopez are only slightly more entertaining than Fogler, each struggling with the bad material and unformed ideas. Then there is poor James Hong. As Fogler's ping pong guru this longtime character actor is repeatedly humiliated in the filmmaker's attempt to find something funny.

The only actor to survive and even grasp this horrible concept is Christopher Walken. The legendary Mr. Walken finds what little funny there is in Balls of Fury by simply doing his own thing. Walken crafts his wacked out bad guy character, commits to every detail and belts it to the back of the room. Walken's seemingly method approach to this bizarre character, an American pretending to be a Chinese gangster, is at times utterly sublime simply for Walken's dedication to playing it straight.

Balls of Fury is a bad movie. Poorly crafted, poorly conceived and stunningly sloppy for a mainstream Hollywood release. Thomas Lennon and Ben Garant have once again failed miserably in attempting to translate their unique brand of sketch and improv comedy to the big screen. And yet, Christoper Walken is so classically Walken-esque, there is almost a reason to subject yourself to this piece of junk. I'm far from willing to recommend Balls of Fury, but fans of Christopher Walken with a lot of time to spare may find something oddly entertaining.

Movie Review: Take Me Home Tonight

Take Me Home Tonight (2011)

Directed by Michael Dowse 

Written by Jackie Filgo, Jeff Filgo 

Starring Topher Grace, Anna Faris, Teresa Palmer, Dan Fogler 

Release Date March 4th, 2011 

Published March 3rd, 2011 

Nostalgia is a great selling point; so long as the seller knows truly what is being sold. You are essentially selling memories back to those who had them. You are selling familiarity and the comfort of things remembered. The makers of “Take Me Home Tonight” are aware of what they are selling and the pitch is funny enough that you won't regret buying it. 

Topher Grace is the star of “Take Me Home Tonight” as confused underachiever, Matt Franklin. Sure, Matt graduated from M.I.T but he's now back home in California and working at Suncoast Video at the mall. Matt has no idea what to do with the rest of his life but his day takes shape when into his store walks his high school crush, Tori Fredericking (Teresa Palmer.) 

She is attending an annual party being thrown by Matt's twin sister Wendy (Anna Faris) and her jerk boyfriend Kyle (Chris Pratt), a party Matt has always skipped. He will be attending this year however because tonight he will finally ask for Tori's number. Along for the ride will be Matt's only friend Barry (Dan Fogler) who skipped college but is intent on getting the experience of college back in a single night. 

It's an epic night with fights and drugs and sex and all kinds of classic 80's music from the title song, courtesy of Eddie Money, to The Safety Dance, to INXS and even a breakdancing scene. I think I heard a little Duran Duran in there as well; you can't have an 80's set movie without Duran Duran can you? 

Continuity nerds may want to skip “Take Me Home Tonight” as there are plenty of anachronisms to catalog but for those who don't know what year a particular song was released or when a particular TV show debuted, you should be able to focus on the more charming elements of this warm bit of Nostalgia.

Of all of the cast members on “That 70's Show,” another warm bit of nostalgia, Topher Grace has always been my favorite. Grace has an every guy quality, a nebbishy charm, that makes him more relatable than Ashton or Danny Masterson and the rest who all seemed to work very hard at appearing cool. 

Grace did yeoman's work on “That 70's Show” demonstrating how ‘trying’ to be cool is a futile effort. Called upon to continually sacrifice his dignity, Grace did so with a genuine comic flair. He has brought that same genuine quality to his film work, though few have noticed, his movies like “Win a Date With Tad Hamilton,” “In Good Company” and “P.S” have been almost universally ignored. 

Box office success however is not the measure of a good performer and Grace shows in “Take Me Home Tonight” why he is so damn likable, he works harder at it than most do. Grace is funny; he has a good instinct for the laugh. He's handsome in a non-threatening way, i.e. you could leave your girlfriend alone in a room with him without worry. 

It all adds up in “Take Me Home Tonight” to a lead character who is easy to like and easy to root for and it's shocking when you realize how many movies fail at creating that character. On the weekend “Take Me Home Tonight” hits theaters so does a movie called “Beastly” where not one thoughtful, interesting or even modestly likable character emerges. 

See “Take Me Home Tonight” for that warm, nostalgic feeling it offers and for Topher Grace, a funny guy who deserves a better box office fate than some of his former co-stars who have seen so much unearned adulation and star-power despite having a lesser resume.

Movie Review Good Luck Chuck

Good Luck Chuck (2007) 

Directed by Mark Helfrich 

Written by Josh Stolberg 

Starring Dane Cook, Jessica Alba, Dan Fogler 

Release Date September 21st, 2007 

Published September 20th, 2007 

The appeal of comedian Dane Cook has eluded me. I have nothing against the wildly popular comic, I just don't see what's so funny. His stand up repertoire seems to consist of wild, Jim Carrey like gesticulations used to sell underwhelming, punchless punchlines. His physicality is entertaining insofar as mimes trapped in that glass box are entertaining; but for my money, his act isn't all that funny. That's not even considering accusations that the unfunny jokes he tells are stolen from other comics. 

As for Cook's movie career, thus far, it's not quite as funny as his stand up career. His debut, in a starring role, in last fall's Employee Of The Month, was a bland, forgettable romantic comedy with the acting challenged Cook playing off the even more challenged Jessica Simpson. Now, for Cook's latest starring effort, after he tanked in a dramatic role opposite Kevin Costner in Mr. Brooks this past summer, Cook upgrades his romantic partner and still delivers a bland and forgettable effort. Starring opposite the endlessly appealing Jessica Alba, the appeal of Dane Cook continues to baffle the mind in Good Luck Chuck.

Charlie (Dane Cook) has never had trouble meeting women. Staying in a relationship however, has been mission impossible. The odd thing about the end of Charlie's relationships? His ex's always seem to marry the next guy they meet. It happens every time and women are beginning to take notice. A posting on the internet about Charlie the good luck charm turns the serially single Charlie into the most sought after stud in his area code.

Is this newfound appeal a blessing or a curse? Charlie's lecherous pal Stu (Dan Fogler) thinks it's the greatest thing ever. Charlie however, finds it to be a burden, especially when he meets Cam (Jessica Alba) who proves to be the girl of his dreams. Unfortunately, if the curse is real and he sleeps with her he could lose her forever; should she meet someone else.

That is a clean description of a plot that is in reality quite ugly and at times even mean spirited. Mark Helfrich, in his directorial debut, attempts to pull off what Judd Apatow and his creative team did with The 40 Year Old Virgin and Knocked Up. What is lacking is just about everything that made those two films so ingenious, daring and lovable.

Both Virgin and Knocked Up featured outlandish low humor that some might find off putting. Each film overcame that obstacle by giving the characters equal amounts of heart and humor to offset the raunch. Good Luck Chuck is mostly heartless with only one character we really give a damn about, Alba's Cam is an oasis in a desert of bad. Charlie, or Chuck from the title, isn't exactly detestable but there is very little appealing about him as he launches into a series of heartless sexual escapades to prove or disprove his curse.

The attempt to justify Chuck/Charlie's behavior by giving it the noble purpose of helping lonely girls take advantage of the curse to then meet their true love fails due to the film's vanity. All but two of Charlie's partners are models whose appearance in the film are not meant to propel this plot. Rather, they are used for the prurient purpose of having them get naked and keep the guys in the audience from nodding off.

The two other women, the ones who don't generally meet societal standards of beauty, are used as comic fodder in mean-spirited jokes at their expense. Only a movie as heartless as Good Luck Chuck could think that mocking these poor desperate characters could be a source of humor. An attempt to keep one of the encounters from being completely heartless and mean fails miserably and comes off not only mean but fake and insulting of both the character in question and those of us in the audience.

Dan Fogler is a Tony Award winning actor. I mention this because it kind of blows my mind. How can an actor be so successful in one medium and so remarkably unappealing and unfunny in a different medium. On stage, Fogler is a comic dynamo beloved by audiences. In movies, Fogler is an embarrassment, a remarkably unfunny presence. In his first starring role, the ping pong comedy, Balls of Fury, Fogler was utterly repellent. In good Luck Chuck, in a smaller, supporting role, he manages to somehow be even less appealing. 

As Stu, Charlie's misogynist best friend, Fogler is a breast obsessed plastic surgeon whose hobbies include masturbating into a grapefruit and worshiping the breast implants of Pamela Anderson which he purchased on Ebay. Why anyone thought this character was funny is beyond me. Jonah Hill portrayed a raunchy over the top character in Knocked Up but Hill did it with a charming and vulnerable quality that revealed how that character used vulgarity as a cover for insecurity. There is zero nuance in Fogler's performance in Good Luck Chuck, he's just a creep. 

Even as I was drifting out of Good Luck Chuck, when I wasn't actively being repulsed by it, I did see some moments where this story or this plot might have worked. Cut back on the prurience, strengthen the characters, and give more time to Jessica Alba's Cam, the only truly likable character in the film, and maybe you could rescue this movie from the garbage. That ship has sailed however and what we are left with is a mess of ugly misogyny, disturbing fetishes, and a lame and completely unbelievable  romance. 

Good Luck Chuck makes Adam Sandler's style of humor look good by comparison.