Classic Movie Review The Princess Bride

The Princess Bride (2017) 

Directed by Rob Reiner 

Written by William Goldman 

Starring Cary Elwes, Mandy Patinkin, Chris Sarandon, Christopher Guest, Wallace Shawn, Robin Wright, Andre the Giant, Billy Crystal Carole Kane

Release Date September 25th, 1987 

Published September 20th, 2017 

The Princess Bride is one of the most rewatchable movies in history. This rich, robust, and homey comedy never ages and never falters. Rob Reiner’s direction, aside from a truly terrible film score, is unassailable in every comedy beat. Then there is the absolutely perfect casting. Cary Elwes, Robin Wright, Mandy Patinkin, Andre the Giant, and each of the supporting players, from Chris Sarandon as the evil Prince, Christopher Guest as the evil six-fingered henchman, and Billy Crystal’s cameo as Miracle Max, could not be better.

This weekend, September 25, The Princess Bride turns 30 years old and I am happy to tell you that I have probably seen this movie more than 30 times in that 30 years. The film feels like home to me with these wonderfully erudite characters, their supreme code of conduct, and the wonderfully generous laughs. I can’t call The Princess Bride a perfect movie, once again I will mention that terrible film score, but it’s damn near perfection.

Westley (Cary Elwes) is a young farm boy in the employ of the family of Buttercup (Robin Wright). Though Buttercup attempts to annoy her farm boy with one silly task after another we are told in Peter Falk’s wonderful voiceover that Westley’s constant refrain, "as you wish," to each of her requests is his way of confessing his love for her. Eventually, Buttercup realizes that she’s been annoying him because she’s been trying to hide her feelings for him and the two fall madly in love just as Westley is about to leave.

Westley is to take to the seas to seek his fortune so that he may soon return and give Buttercup the life she richly deserves. Unfortunately, it’s reported that Westley’s ship was attacked by a pirate legend known as the Dread Pirate Roberts and he does not take prisoners. With Westley thought dead, Buttercup becomes distant and lonely and when the Prince (Chris Sarandon) arrives at her door wanting to make the most beautiful girl in the kingdom his future Queen she accepts knowing that she is only giving her body to the task but not her heart.

What Buttercup doesn’t know is that the Prince is merely using her and plans to kill her with his first plan to have her kidnapped and killed in the fields of the rival kingdom of Gilder. The princess’s captors are a wonderful comic mixture with the leader Vizzini (Wallace Shawn) claiming to be the smartest person in the world, while his henchmen, Inigo (Mandy Patinkin) and Fezzik (pro wrestling super-legend Andre the Giant) are the greatest swordsman and the biggest brut in the kingdom respectively.

Read my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal. 

Movie Review Vamps

Vamps (2012) 

Directed by Amy Heckerling 

Written by Amy Heckerling 

Starring Alicia Silverstone, Krysten Ritter, Sigourney Weaver, Dan Stevens, Richard Lewis, Wallace Shawn, Justin Kirk

Release Date November 2nd, 2012 

Published November 5th, 2012 

I could watch Krysten Ritter in just about anything. As the star of ABC's under-appreciated sitcom "Don't Trust the 'B' in Apartment 23" Ritter's acerbic wit sets the series apart from other shows that wish they could be as edgy and funny. Ritter has a fearlessness that never feels like an act. It's the same fearlessness Ritter brings to her role in the modest but pleasant living dead comedy "Vamps."

Don't Trust the Vamp

Goody (Alicia Silverstone) and Stacy (Ritter) seem like any other nightlife loving New Yorkers. The only difference is that they've loved the nightlife for a great deal longer than the kids they party with. Goody and Stacy are vampires; Goody for more than 100 years and Stacy since the 90's. The same 'Stem' Vampire played with devilish wit by Sigourney Weaver turned both.

"Vamps" turns on an unexpected and inconvenient romance. Stacy falls in love with Joey (Dan Stevens), a slightly tragic circumstance because Joey happens to be Joey Van Helsing, heir to the vampire hunting legend currently held by his father, played by the brilliant Wallace Shawn. In the course of events, it is revealed that Stacy could return to human form, thus offering her the chance to be with Joey, if her stem vampire is killed.

Alicia Silverstone and Richard Lewis?

Circumstances are much more complicated for Goody. You see, if the stem vampire were killed the girls would return to their real ages. For Stacy that means her early 40's. Goody however is over 100 years old and thus will herself die. There is also a complex romance for Goody who stumbles on a former lover played by Richard Lewis with a sad tale of his own.

Don't worry fans of director Amy Heckerling, the proceedings of "Vamps" are not nearly as bleak, or dramatic as my last paragraph makes them seem. "Vamps" maintains a lighthearted tone throughout and while I won't say the film is wall to wall laughs, it is as consistently amusing as you would expect from the director of "Clueless."

Hopping the Vampire Bandwagon

Many critics have accused Heckerling of jumping the Vampire bandwagon, citing the popularity of the 'Twilight' franchise as the inspiration for "Vamps." There is an element of truth to that but "Vamps" has enough juice in it's own story to stand well apart from the glum, goofy characters of Stephanie Meyers' money train.

Heckerling may be forcefully attempting to capture the zeitgeist but she also invests in this story, in both the laughs and the difficult choices her characters have to make and the unlikely dramatic circumstances they find themselves in. Also, let's credit Heckerling with her faithfulness to classic vampire lore, unlike the shiny ones of 'Twilight,' these "Vamps" avoid sunlight.

"Vamps doesn't approach the wit or charm of Heckerling's twin teen comedy masterworks, "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" or "Clueless," but it has an ease and good humor that many modern comedies can't muster. Add to that a terrifically game cast, especially the radiant Ms. Ritter, and you have a movie more than worth a stop at the Redbox.

Movie Review The Haunted Mansion

The Haunted Mansion (2003) 

Directed by Rob Minkoff 

Written by David Berenbaum 

Starring Eddie Murphy, Terence Stamp, Wallace Shawn, Jennifer Tilly 

Release Date November 26th, 2003 

Published November 25th, 2003 

It may be time to finally put our memories of Eddie Murphy 'comic genius' away for good. It seems we will never see Murphy's talent ever again. With every mediocre family movie in which he picks up an eight figure paycheck, the Eddie Murphy of our memory dies a little. Eddie can't go and make an edgy, raunchy, action comedy anymore because it might cost him his next family movie paycheck. With his latest mediocre family movie, The Haunted Mansion, Murphy pounds yet another nail into the coffin of his former comic persona.

In The Haunted Mansion, which is based on the Disney theme park ride, Murphy is real estate maven Jim Evers of Evers and Evers Real Estate. The family's cringe-inducing catchphrase is “Evers and Evers making your family happy for Evers and Evers.” Yikes. In an all too familiar plot, Jim works way too much, and his wife Sara (Marsha Tomason) is upset that he doesn't spend enough time with the kids, daughter Megan (Aree Davis) and son Michael (Marc John Jeffries).

To that end, Jim proposes a family trip to the lake with no work at all for the entire weekend. No work until a new client comes calling with a huge property to sell. It's a gothic 1800s mansion called Gracie Manor and if the Evers want the listing they have to come immediately. In what is supposed to be a quick detour from their trip, the family stops at Gracie Manor to meet the owner and wind up spending the night with ghosts, zombies, and various other horror movie staples.

The ghosts in the Haunted Mansion are Master Gracie (Nathaniel Parker) and his staff, headed up by Ramsley (Terrence Stamp) the butler and his assistants played by Wallace Shawn and Dina Spybey. Jennifer Tilly also shows up as a gypsy in magic ball. The ghosts of Gracie Manor can only escape if their curse is lifted and the vagaries of the curse involve a woman who looks exactly like Sara Evers. When Sara is captured by the ghosts, it's up to Jim to save her and find some other way to lift the curse.

Eddie Murphy, as he does even in his worst films, shows flashes of the kind of comedy we know he's capable of. Murphy remains charismatic and occasionally that comic spark comes back. But sadly, for the most part, Eddie Murphy in The Haunter Mansion is in pick up a check mode. Murphy's Jim Evers is a bumbling scaredy cat channeling Abbott & Costello meet Frankenstein, until it's time for him to save the day. That might not sound bad but Murphy's strength is not being Abbott or Costello and his idea of broad physical comedy is forced and unpleasant. 

Poor Terrence Stamp looks, in every scene, as if he can barely keep from rolling his eyes. Stamp's boredom with this lame material is evident in his every gesture, facial expression and line of dialogue. Like Murphy, he's not here to make The Haunted Mansion good, he's here to get his paycheck and go do something else. This is a feeling that permeates the entirety of The Haunted Mansion, a complete disinterest in actually making a good movie. 

Director Rob Minkoff is one of those studio hacks that Disney keeps on the payroll just for movies like this: Mediocre, inoffensive family comedies that need merely to transfer script to screen. Minkoff shows little directorial flair in The Haunted Mansion. It's likely he could spend his entire career turning out mediocre hits like this one or another Stuart Little movie. The Haunted Mansion is not an offensively bad movie. Merely a mediocre movie. Of course I've often wondered just which is worse, mediocre or just plain bad.

Movie Review Toy Story 3

Toy Story 3 (2010) 

Directed by Lee Unkrich 

Written by Michael Arndt 

Starring Tom Hanks, Tim Allen, Joan Cusack, Don Rickles, Wallace Shawn, John Ratzenberger

Release Date June 18th, 2010 

Published June 17th, 2010 

With the release of “Toy Story 3” Pixar authored a third masterpiece in the film series that began the company's unmatched winning streak. Toy Story 3 is as bright, imaginative, compassionate and thoughtful as the first two entries in the series. And yet, the series doesn't simply fall back on qualities that it has become known for. Much like how a child learns about the world, the Toy Story franchises grows, learns to embrace change, and gets better for the lessons learned and commented upon. 

We rejoin our friends Buzz (Tom Hanks) and Woody (Tim Allen) and their family of toys as they make a vain attempt to get their kid Andy's attention. Andy is now 18 years old and preparing to leave for college. It's been several years since Andy has played with his toys but they hold out hope that one day he might pick them up again. If not, there is always the attic where they can wait for Andy to start a family and pass them on to his kids.

Things go awry however when Andy's mom mistakes the toys, sans Woody who Andy decides to take with him to college, stuffed into a garbage bag intended by Andy for the attic, for trash. This begins one terrifically suspenseful action scene as Woody risks everything to get to the curb and save his friends while Buzz attempts to save the day from inside the bag.

Thinking that Andy had abandoned them, the toys duck into a box of toys to be donated to a local day care center. Woody joins them, attempting to get them to go back to Andy. The day care meanwhile seems like a dream, a retirement home for toys where they can get played with by new kids for years to come.

There is a sinister undercurrent to all of the good natured fun of this kid friendly aesthetic. That sinister undercurrent emanates from a suspiciously too friendly stuffed bear named Lotso (Ned Beatty) who steps forward as a leader of the daycare toys and appears to have a place for the new arrivals. However, instead of taking care of Woody and his pals, Lotso dooms them to the Butterfly room where kids too young to properly care for toys end up playing with them in the most painstaking fashion.

Juxtaposed with this story is Woody's journey to get back to Andy and his very real internal conflict between his loyalty to Andy and his loyalty to his family of toys. It's remarkable the ways in which director Lee Unkrich along with Toy Story creators John Lasseter and Andrew Stanton cause us to invest so deeply, emotionally in these toy characters. We feel for these characters as deeply as any human character we've ever seen on screen.

Just as remarkable is how this deep emotional connection is forged with joy and laughter. Toy Story 3 racks up big laughs through out its feature length even at the most dramatic and heart rending moments. Unkrich, Lasseter and Stanton know that the best way to deliver a hard lesson is to follow it with a big laugh and no scene demonstrates this quite as well as the landfill conveyor scene, a scene filled with danger, sadness and eventually a big laugh.

This is some of the finest writing and voice acting we've seen in any Pixar feature and some of the most eye popping, remarkable animation as well. Pixar has advanced this art form to such lengths that it's hard to find superlatives that haven't already been overly ascribed to the artists at Pixar.

”Toy Story 3” is a masterpiece. It is a remarkably emotional, action packed, breathtakingly beautiful movie. The characters that we came to know from Pixar's early days have only grown even more warmhearted, funny and vulnerable over the years and our emotional investment in them has only deepened with each ensuing adventure. What a remarkable feeling it is to be moved so deeply by non-human characters. Moved and yet also gleefully, joyfully entertained.