Classic Movie Review Demolition Man Take 2

Demolition Man (1993) 

Directed by Marco Brambilla 

Written by Daniel Waters 

Starring Sylvester Stallone, Wesley Snipes, Sandra Bullock, Nigel Hawthorne, Benjamin Bratt, Denis Leary

Release Date October 9th 1993

Published October 11th, 2023 

Demolition Man is a desperate, sad, and pathetic attempt by Sylvester Stallone to cast himself as the 'cool guy.' There was this character archetype of the 80s and 90s, one pioneered by Eddie Murphy, for the most part. It's a character who is the smartest, funniest, coolest guy in any room that he's in. I call these characters Bugs Bunny types. Bugs Bunny was always one step ahead of whoever he was on screen with. Bugs was never the subject of the joke, he was the one delivering the punchline. No one got over on Bugs Bunny, he always came out on top by being funnier, smarter, and more dynamic than anyone else on screen. 

Whether Eddie Murphy was aware of it or not, his Beverly Hills Cop persona is an R-Rated version of a Bugs Bunny archetype. Axel Foley is Bugs Bunny. He's always three steps ahead of everyone in a scene. Axel is the funniest, smartest, and wittiest person in every moment. No one can keep up with Axel or Bugs Bunny and no one is allowed to get one over on Axel or Bugs Bunny. There is an element of the archetypal Simpson's character Poochie in Axel Foley as in the few moments that Axel is off screen, everyone has to be talking about Axel and wondering what he's doing at that moment. 

I don't mean this to demean Eddie Murphy or his performance as Axel Foley, it's merely an observation. Being like Bugs Bunny is a solid compliment. There is also the matter of coming timing and instinct that make Eddie Murphy such a comic icon. His bravado, that swagger, it's unlike anyone we've seen in this kind of role. Why am I lingering on Beverly Hills Cop, Bugs Bunny, and Eddie Murphy in a review of Demolition Man? Because Sylvester Stallone wants so badly to be as cool as Eddie Murphy. 

It's very clear that the lead role in Demolition Man was written with someone of Murphy's comic timing and instinct in mind. It's clear that the movie would benefit from having a fleet footed comic voice at the heart of the story. It's also clear that having Sylvester Stallone and his sad, desperate, egotism at the heart of the movie, drags the whole thing down. Stallone is not an actor with strong comic instincts. He's lumbering, he speaks slowly, and he's not cool, no matter how much he might want you to believer it. He's simply not believable as the smartest, funniest, most dynamic guy in any room that he's in. 

Thus, what should be a fast paced action comedy, becomes a flat, lumbering, lumbering, clumsy, testosterone heavy, bloated explosion-fest. In order to frame Stallone as the coolest guy in any room, the rest of the cast is forced to dial back their performances to match Stallone's slow, witless cadence. So, we have a character played by a young and lovable Sandra Bullock who is rendered almost unwatchable as she bravely battles her way through some of the worst dialogue in any movie ever. And you have a remaining supporting cast that is not allowed to have either screen time or presence that might compete with Stallone or make him look any less dynamic than he already appears. 

Only Wesley Snipes is allowed to shine opposite Stallone and thus why Snipes disappears for so much time in Demolition Man. Though Snipes' Simon Phoenix is the big bad of Demolition Man, his colorful villain is kept off screen for lengthy periods of time while the screenwriters desperately try to craft scenes to make Stallone look cool. The world building in Demolition Man might appear, on the surface, to be similar to any other sci-fi movie set in the future. But, look closer, if you do, you can see a series of innovations that are clearly inventions intended to make Stallone appear more relatable and especially cooler than anyone else in the movie. 

One example that stands out as the kind of gag that is written for an Eddie Murphy type comic actor that falls flat as delivered by Stallone, involves bathroom habits of the future. I'd rather not linger on the famed 'three seashells' of Demolition Man, but the gag is one that Murphy would have thrived in riffing on. There would undoubtedly be a fast paced, curse word laden rant that Murphy would riff off the top of his head about the 'three seashells.' In the hands of Murphy, it's a masterpiece of raunchy humor. In the hands of Sylvester Stallone, the bit dies an unmourned death that raises far too many needless questions that distract from the story being told. 

For those that aren't familiar with Demolition Man, the story goes that Sylvester Stallone is John Spartan, a cop in 1996 Los Angeles. Spartan is a good cop who plays his own rules, a classic cliche of 80s and 90s action movies. John Spartan has been given the awkward moniker, Demolition Man, because his style of being a cop involves a remarkable level of property damage and death. In pursuing the violent criminal gang leader, Simon Phoenix (Wesley Snipes), Spartan is accused of getting a group of hostages killed and Spartan himself is convicted and placed in a cryo-prison. 

Frozen inside a giant ice cube, John Spartan is sleeping his life away until 2036 when his old nemesis, Simon Phoenix escapes from the same cryo-prison under strange circumstances. In 2036, there is no crime, no music, no salt, no sugar, and society is a pristine, plasticized bore. The Police still exist but they don't have much to do. Thus, when Simon Phoenix commits the first murders in more than 30 years, no one in the Police Department is prepared to deal with his level of violence. A young cop named Lenina Huxley offers an unusual solution, thaw out legendary cop John Spartan, reinstate him to the Police and have him track down Simon Phoenix. 

That's the plot of Demolition Man and there are the building blocks of a good idea in there. It's a classic fish out of water scenario in which a man from a different time suffers comical culture shock in a future he doesn't understand. It's a premise rife with easy culture clash gags that might be elevated by a comic mind like Eddie Murphy. Sadly, with Sylvester Stallone in the lead, the jokes basically devolve to dimwitted observations about how boring the future is without cool stuff we had in the past. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Back on the Strip

Back on the Strip (2023) 

Directed by Chris Spencer

Written by Eric Daniel, Chris Spencer

Starring Spencer Moore II, Tiffany Haddish, Wesley Snipes, J.B Smoove, Bill Bellamy, Faizon Love 

Release Date August 18th, 2023 

Published August 23rd, 2023 

Why is this movie called Back on the Strip? That's a rhetorical question that I am merely using as a jumping off point, don't try to answer it. The main character of Back on the Strip has a role that fits neither of the two meanings the title implies. Merlin (Spencer Moore II) is not back on the strip in Las Vegas, he's never been there before. And Merlin has never stripped down as a professional stripper before. Thus, he can't be 'Back on the Strip.' I call him the main character because the movie revolves entirely around Merlin and yet you can sense that no one involved in the making of this movie has any interest in Merlin or confidence that lead actor, Spencer Moore II can carry this movie. 

Back on the Strip should just be called Merlin, or you could call it 'Magic Merlin' and hope that people get that it is a reference to Magic Mike. That would make far more sense than the actual title. Then again, considering that Back on the Strip is a slapdash, slipshod, nonsensical movie to begin with, why does it matter if the title is also nonsense. I'm spending time complaining about the title because complaining about the actual movie is a deeply unappealing obligation that I have. Here we go... 

Back on the Strip is about a dreamer named Merlin. As a kid, Merlin fell in love with magic and dreamed of being a professional magician. Unfortunately, his earliest attempt at achieving his dream was a disaster of epic proportion. Mostly, this failure introduces the running gag and theme of the film, Merlin has a giant penis. I'm not merely saying he has a giant penis, I'm saying his penis is a medical anomaly. The entirety of Back on the Strip hinges upon revealing his secret giant penis and then returning to that as a gag and plot point throughout the rest of the movie. 

Find my full length review at Filthy.Media 

Classic Movie Review Boiling Point

Boiling Point (1993) 

Directed by James B. Harris 

Written by James B. Harris 

Starring Wesley Snipes, Dennis Hopper, Viggo Mortensen 

Release Date April 16th, 1993

Published June 8th, 1993 

Sometimes the making of a movie is far more interesting than the movie being made. That is unquestionably true of the 1993 crime drama, Boiling Point. The film began life as an independent film character study of a pair of seedy criminals, one striving for a better life, the other a hothead determined to destroy them both. A small part of that story was about the cop searching for both of these criminals as tension reaches a boiling point and they collide in a tragic series of events. 

That's what Boiling Point was meant to be with Dennis Hopper playing a seasoned criminal low life with dreams of getting out alive and making a life for himself. Viggo Mortensen played the doomed hotheaded young criminal whose attraction to violence would be the downfall of both men. Wesley Snipes was to be the cop looking to arrest the two for killing a fellow cop in the midst of a robbery gone terribly, horribly wrong. 

Then, something happened. As the film was being completed, Wesley Snipes became one of the hottest stars in Hollywood. Seeing that they had a chance to turn this cheap independent thriller into a box office bonanza on the back of one of the hottest stars in Hollywood, producers and studio execs demanded rewrites and reshoots to beef up Snipes role from a relatively minor supporting role to a presence they could promote in marketing the film. 

This is all very obvious in the final Frankenstein's monster of a movie that is Boiling Point. Most scenes featuring Wesley Snipes have him interacting with people other than Hopper and Mortensen. Most of Mortensen's performance, including most of the depth of the character, has been excised to make room for more scenes featuring Wesley Snipes. Snipes's reshot scenes are clumsily sewn into the movie and rarely add any depth to the main story which still centers on Hopper's criminal trying and failing to be a better person. 

Rather than the wild-eyed monster that Hopper would play in other villainous roles, his character in Boiling Point is a pathetic, fast-talking sadsack. He's a man who is desperate to escape his circumstances and when he sees a potential payday that could be the key to his happy ever after, he risks everything to get there. It's clear that there was an important subplot involving Hopper and Valerie Perrine who plays his ex-wife. Wanting to win her back, despite a history that includes violent abuse, is a big motivation for Hopper's character. But, as the movie shoved in more about Snipes, we got less of Perrine. 

There are numerous examples of how executives cut up and rejiggered Boiling Point to capitalize on Wesley Snipes. The most glaring example is how Snipes rarely shares a scene with any of the rest of the cast, including Hopper and Mortensen. The only tangible link between Snipes and the rest of the movie comes from a reshot subplot in which Snipes' cop and a sex worker played by Lolita Davidovich, have an affair while she acts as a street informant for Snipes. She's also seeing Hopper's character as a client, but this somehow never becomes important to the plot. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review: Undisputed

Undisputed (2002) 

Directed by Walter Hill 

Written by David Giler, Walter Hill

Starring Ving Rhames, Wesley Snipes, Peter Falk, Michael Rooker, Jon Seda, Master P, Wes Studi 

Release Date August 23rd, 2002

Published December 2nd, 2002 

Of all the film genres that have become slaves to the cliches that made them, none is more trapped in cliche than the sports movie. Ever since Rocky, the sports movie has been doomed to the cliches of the big game, big fight, big moment. If it's a team game like baseball or football the team will be stocked with overused characters. 

Characters like the star, the jerk, the fat guy, the foreigner and the joker, and of course the troubled rookie who doesn't think he can make it but ends up winning the game. If it's a one-on-one sport like boxing then the film is doomed to repeat the cliches Rocky bred, i.e. the underdog overcoming great odds to succeed. It is these cliches that make Walter Hill's Undisputed stand out from most other sports movies. Hill's film breaks from genre cliches which makes Undisputed a surprisingly entertaining sports movie.

The film stars Wesley Snipes as Monroe Hutchins, the heavyweight champion boxer of the California State penal system. Hutchens is in prison for life for murdering a man who was sleeping with his wife. In his time in prison Monroe has spent ten years in the prison-boxing program and has won 68 consecutive fights. 

Enter the man who is THE world heavyweight champion, George "The Iceman" Chambers (Ving Rhames). Having just been convicted of rape, a charge that he vehemently denies, Chambers is sent to the same prison where Hutchins has become champion. To avoid problems, Hutchins is placed in solitary confinement where he remains for a month until an ex-mobster named Mendy Ripstein (Peter Falk) pulls some strings to set up a fight between Hutchins and The Iceman.

What is most surprising about Undisputed is that director Walter Hill is actually able to raise a solid level of suspense. The audience honestly has no idea who will win the fight. To achieve this Hill strips away both fighters’ likability, leaving the audience little rooting interest and yet there remains actual suspense thanks to Hill's exceptional direction. In a genre where the outcomes are usually tipped off well ahead of time, it's a rather remarkable feat to inject real, honest to goodness, suspense and unpredictability. 

Ignore the cover box of the Undisputed video and DVD with it's helicopters and fire. This is not an action movie, there are no daring escapes, no explosions, not even any fire. The only thing explosive about Undisputed is it's punches which Walter Hill choreographs well. By shucking traditional boxing rules and putting into the script that the fight is non traditional boxing, Hill frees the two stars from having to fake their way through boxing technique. In this fight they simply throw punches and fall down.

There are flaws in Undisputed. Such as the fact that I highly doubt, or at least hope, that prisons are not spending tax dollars on elaborate boxing cages with pay per view quality lighting rigs and an announcer played by former MTV personality Ed Lover. But that is a minor quibble. In the end when you combine Snipes’ and Rhames’ quality performances and Walter Hill's sure handed direction you get a quality entertaining sports movie. A very rare commodity.

Movie Review: Blade 2

Blade 2 

Directed by Guillermo Del Toro

Written by David S. Goyer

Starring Wesley Snipes, Kris Kristofferson, Ron Perlman, Leonor Varela, Norman Reedus

Release Date March 25th, 2002 

Published March 24th, 2002

Back in 1998, Blade modernized the tired vampire genre with pure balls to the wall adrenaline and Pre-Matrix quality fight scenes. Forget the brain-dead script and Stephen Dorff's screen chewing, Blade was awesome, pure entertainment and nothing more. Now comes the sequel, and it far surpasses the original. It's bigger, dumber, and even more entertaining.

Blade 2 reintroduces us to our hero, half-vampire, half-human, all-vampire hunter Blade, played by the ultracharismatic Wesley Snipes. He is searching for his mentor, Kris Kristofferson, who we believed to be dead in the first film. We come to find out that he is alive and has been turned into a vampire. Blade finds his mentor and rehabs him with a special serum. Whether the serum worked remains in question for the balance of the film, providing some fun suspense.

But that’s just the beginning. The vampire nation has offered Blade a truce and wants a face-to-face meeting to discuss a plague worse than vampires. It seems there is a mutated vampire virus called the Reaper strain that mutates vampires into stronger, more volatile beings, who feed on both humans and vampires. Blade realizes the reapers are a bigger threat than vampires and agrees to lead a team of vampires known as the Bloodpack, highly trained vamps who had been trained to hunt Blade but now must take orders from him. 

Thankfully, we are spared introductions to each member of the pack save for Reinhardt (Ron Perlmen) and Nyssa, played by the gorgeous Leonor Varela. Norman Reedus rounds out the cast as Blade's lackey and gadget guy. The film is stylish and sly with a fantastic soundtrack of rock-rap claptrap that hits all the right notes, always spiking right as Blade snaps someone’s neck or breaks someone’s limbs. The film is ultraviolent but in a completely cartoonish way, it’s a nod to its comic book roots.

Director Guiermillo Del Toro keeps the pace up and the plot to a minimum providing a perfect balance between gory violence and dark humor. The film never takes itself seriously and never asks the audience to do so either and it is that element that makes this film easier to enjoy than say Resident Evil or Tomb Raider. Blade doesn't care too much about story or character development, it relies on star Wesley Snipes to make the action credible and entertaining. Snipes exceeds expectation, oozing charisma and a dark sense of humor that the character lacked in the first film.

Blade 2 is endlessly entertaining though probably not for everyone. It definitely worked for me and I think it's one of the best films I've seen this year.

Movie Review: Brooklyn's Finest

Brooklyn's Finest (2009) 

Directed by Antoine Fuqua 

Written by Michael C. Martin

Starring Richard Gere, Don Cheadle, Ethan Hawke, Wesley Snipes, Lily Taylor, Ellen Barkin 

Release Date March 5th, 2010 

Published March 4th, 2010 

There is sluggishness to the alpha male posing of Brooklyn's Finest the latest in a long line of troubled cop movies. Richard Gere, Don Cheadle and Ethan Hawke play a three headed monster of ethically compromised cops in one of the toughest precincts in New York City. Stop me if you've heard that story before.

Richard Gere plays Eddie in Brooklyn's Finest, a depressed cop seven days from retirement. An inveterate drunk, Eddie plans on not getting killed in his last week as a cop and if that means letting a few calls go by so be it. Bad luck for Eddie that he gets stuck breaking in rookies in a week in which his Brooklyn precinct is all over the headlines.

A cop has been arrested for robbing what he thought was a drug dealer but turned out to be an honor student. Meanwhile another cop, Sal (Ethan Hawke) has just murdered and robbed an informant (Vincent D'Onofrio) and is ready for more robbing and killing as he looks to move his growing family, 5 kids with twins on the way, out of a rickety row house.

While Eddie longs for retirement and Sal risks his life in more and more dangerous fashion, Tango (Don Cheadle) seems safe by comparison, working undercover on the streets hoping to take down a major drug gang. Sure, he's dealing with deadly thugs on a daily basis but his cover is so strong he seems impervious to the danger.

In fact, Tango's cover is so good one might wonder which side he's on, especially after he gets close with Caz (Wesley Snipes) a major drug dealer fresh out of prison. Caz saved Tango's life when Tango began his undercover stint in prison. Now, as Cas is getting acclimated to the streets again, Tango questions whether he can take him down.

There is drama to be found in director Antoine Fuqua's violence fueled narrative but not much of it resonates beyond what has come before it in other, better cop movies. Fuqua's own Training Day, with Ethan Hawke no less, is a far more interesting and daring film in comparison to the well worn path walked by Brooklyn's Finest.

Don Cheadle delivers a standout performance as the least conflicted of the conflicted cops. Cheadle is a compelling actor whose intense gaze brims with calculating intelligence. To look at Cheadle is to want to know what he's thinking and follow his every deliberate move.

Ethan Hawke and Richard Gere are far less successful. Hawke is among the least convincing Italian cops in movie history putting on accent only when calling out to his stereotypically named kids Vinnie and Joey. Gere's Eddie is merely pathetic. One can argue that he is pathetic with a purpose, his redemption will rely on rock bottom dwelling, but a scene in which he proposes to a hooker is more laughable than sad.

A mixed bag of cop movie clichés, New York stereotypes and the occasional bit of hardcore violence, Brooklyn's Finest holds promise for fans of Don Cheadle and little else. One would be better served picking up Cheadle's exceptional performance in Out of Sight for a similarly smart and more nuanced performance.