Movie Review: Zookeeper

Zookeeper (2011) 

Directed by Frank Coraci

Written by Nick Bakay, Rock Reuben, Kevin James, Jay Sherick, David Ronn

Starring Kevin James, Sylvester Stallone, Rosario Dawson, Leslie Bibb, Nick Nolte, Cher

Release Date July 8th, 2011

Published July 7th, 2011

Kevin James is a big, lovable teddy bear of a guy who is hard not to root for. That appeal comes in handy in a movie like Zookeeper which indicates from its premise that critics should really hate it. The premise has James talking with zoo animals who give him advice about his love life. So... yeah, that's actually the premise. 

To be fair to my profession, the most recent examples of humans talking with animals include such dreadful films as Dr. Doolittle 1 & 2 with Eddie Murphy, a pair of Alvin & the Chipmunk debacles and Hop. History would seem to dictate that Zookeeper should be brutal. That it is far from brutal, indeed it's modestly enjoyable is quite something.

Hilarious Heartbreak

Griffin (James) is in love with Stephanie (Leslie Bibb) but unfortunately she can't love a modest zookeeper. Too bad she tells him this after he pops the question in an elaborate romantic gesture, a terrifically funny scene exceptionally well played by Kevin James who earns our sympathy right off the bat.

Cut to five years later and Griffin is thinking of leaving the zoo to work at his brother Dave's (Nat Faxon) exotic car shop. When the zoo animals get wind of their favorite zookeeper thinking of leaving the finally reveal that they can talk. The reveal on the animals talking is another great scene from James who reacts as someone likely should react when animals begin speaking to them only funnier.

Animals Can Talk

In order to convince Griffin to stay the zoo animals come up with a plan to teach him how to win Stephanie back. Again, you will be surprised how often you laugh during these scenes as James goes all out throwing himself into all sorts of physical gags as he works to make us laugh.

The animal voice cast includes Sylvester Stallone and Cher as Lions, Adam Sandler, doing one of his irritating voices as a monkey, Maya Rudolf as a giraffe and most surprisingly, Nick Nolte as TGIFriday's loving gorilla. Nolte is a wonderfully strange choice who infuses even the goofiest scene with unnecessary vocal gravitas.

If You Liked Paul Blart...

Zookeeper has no right to be as funny as it is but then again neither did Kevin James's last lead comic performance in Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Both films look dreadful on the surface but watching them, I was caught off guard by the number of times Kevin James made me laugh.

No other actor in Hollywood works harder to make an audience laugh. Most of the time when an actor desperately tries to make you laugh they fail, it's all too obvious and desperate. James however, brings sweetness to his desperation that makes him sympathetic.

Of course, Zookeeper is not going to win any Oscars and likely won't remember any of it in a couple days but while watching it I laughed a great deal more than I expected to. Kevin James is a funny, sweet and hard working guy that you just can't help but root for even as you wish he weren't in a talking animal movie.

Hotel Transylvania 3 Summer Vacation

Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation (2018) 

Directed by Genndy Tartakovsky

Written by Michael McCullers, Genndy Tartakovsky

Starring Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Andy Samberg, David Spade, Selena Gomez

Release Date July 13th, 2018

Published July 14th, 2018

Hotel Transylvania Summer Vacation is the third and least offensive of this trilogy of Adam Sandler starring animated comedies. I wasn’t a fan of the first two Hotel Transylvania movies which felt, to me, too scatological, like a sanitized version of what Sandler does in his live action work. This time, however, with the franchise leaving the titular hotel there is something of a different feel to everything and for the first time, I laughed out loud more than once watching a Hotel Transylvania movie. 

Hotel Transylvania Summer Vacation finds our hero Drac (Sandler) lonely. Sure, he has a loving family and great friends but he wants a companion and at the same time feels guilty for wanting one for the first time since the death of his wife. Drac’s daughter Mavis meanwhile, mistakes his loneliness for stress and comes up with a solution, a dream cruise to the Bermuda Triangle. The whole family is going including Frank (Kevin James), Griffin the Invisible Man (David Spade), Murray the Mummy (Keegan Michael Key) and Wayne the Wolf and his wife Wanda and ALL of their kids. 

While Drac appreciates his daughter’s effort a cruise for a hotel owner feels rather redundant but things pick up when he Drac meets the Captain of the Cruise ship, Ericka (Kathryn Hahn). Drac is immediately smitten and I must say, the scenes with Drac overcome with feelings on meeting Ericka is very cute and it made me smile. The follow up scene in which an over-confident Drac struts around the ship to Bruno Mars’ “24 Karat Magic” is delightful with a funny if not all that original payoff. 

So, we have a love story on our hands and that means we need obstacles and this movie has a pretty good one. Ericka has a secret, the cruise is a sham and she has set it up so she can get revenge on Drac. You see, Ericka is Ericka Van Helsing, of the vampire-killing Van Helsings. She’s trained her whole life to kill Drac. Her great-grandfather Van Helsing (Jim Gaffigan) has stayed alive long past a normal lifespan, just to see his granddaughter vanquish Drac as he had failed to. 

That’s a pretty clever conflict, I gotta admit, I really liked that. The first film played a similar conflict with Andy Samberg’s human falling for Selena Gomez’ vampire but that was somehow far less fun than this. This film seems to delight a little more in the conflict as Drac is the one who is unaware of the danger he’s in. I really enjoyed the romantic sequence of Drac repeatedly saving Ericka while she’s attempting to recover a weapon she intends to kill him with. She begins to fall for him and yet she’s torn. It’s just clever enough to be amusing. 

My favorite gag in Hotel Transylvania could not be more simple. It’s a flashback to Van Helsing attempting to capture Drac and his friends on a train. We see Van Helsing enter, we know the monsters are hidden at the front of the car. We see Van Helsing pull out a box of matches, the tension builds because we know what’s coming, we know from the other movies how Frank reacts to fire. When Van Helsing lights the match, Frank freaks out and the scene and the movie are off and running. There’s nothing special here, but the simplicity made me laugh. 

Hotel Transylvania 3 Summer Vacation is nothing special, it’s certainly not a Pixar quality work. This isn’t art but for a shallow kiddie flick, it’s pretty good. It made me laugh at these monster characters for the first time in the entire franchise so that’s something. Having low expectations certainly helped matters. But there is something more genuine and winning about this outing in the Hotel Transylvania franchise. Something slightly more clever and less lowest common denominator. Whatever the reason, I enjoyed it enough to say this one is worth seeing. 

Movie Review Grown Ups

Grown Ups (2010) 

Directed by Dennis Dugan

Written by Adam Sandler, Fred Wolf

Starring Adam Sandler, Chris Rock, David Spade, Rob Schneider, Kevin James, Taylor Lautner

Release Date June 25th, 2010 

Published June 24th, 2010

Critics, like me, can decry the Adam Sandler brand of comedy all day. We do, we will, I will. But, we cannot deny its continuing success. Sandler is, arguably, the safest business bet in all of Hollywood. Even at his worst in garbage like “Bedtime Stories,” the worst film of 2008, bar none, Sandler still turns out his fans and returns on studio investments. That will not change with the release of “Grown Ups.” This thin excuse for Sandler to get his oldest friends together for a lakeside working vacation is exceptionally typical of the Sandler brand: dog doo, passing gas and copious pratfalls. It's not filmic poetry but fans of the brand do not care.

In “Grown Ups” Adam Sandler is Lenny, a 40-something Hollywood Agent married to a sexy fashion designer (Salma Hayek) and raising three spoiled kids who text their nanny to bring them things ,and spend most of their time in front of a flat screen TV. Lenny laments his children's lack of imagination but does little to change them. That is until Lenny is shocked out of his rich boy Hollywood idyll by the death of his childhood mentor and basketball coach, Coach Buzzer (Comic and Sandler crony Blake Clark).

Gathering up his wife and brats, Lenny is headed home to a lakeside retreat to meet his old pals and former teammates. There's Eric (Kevin James), the chubby one, whose wife (Maria Bello) is still breastfeeding their 4-year-old son.

Kurt (Chris Rock), a henpecked house husband under the thumb of his pregnant wife (Maya Rudolf). There is Marcus (David Spade), the single and loving ladies man. And finally there is Rob, a dopey thrice divorced vegan spiritualist married to a much, much, much older woman (Joyce Van Patten).

Beyond these minor character quirks there really is nothing to any of these characters. In the course of “Grown Ups” none of these characters evolve, deepen or expand our understanding of them. Sure, each is given an issue to play, like Sandler and his tech-obsessed brats, but each of these issues is resolved with little, if any, dramatic effort.

Like most Adam Sandler comedies, “Grown Ups” is an idea in search of a story or unifying theme that settles for being a series of occasionally funny gags and one liners. Sandler and his company Happy Madison don't so much develop screenplays really; rather, they come up with ideas, grab a camera and hope that something will come together in editing.

Nothing much comes together in “Grown Ups.” David Spade gets in a few good jabs. Kevin James falls down funny once or twice. Rob Schneider has a bit with an arrow that earns a chuckle but the good gags are few and far between. More often you get a lot of dead space in which the gang riffs in search of a punchline, often never finding it and allowing a scene to simply end awkwardly and unfunny.

None of my criticism of “Grown Ups” will matter to the Sandler cult. There is poo, there are multiple farts and the chubby guy, James, falls down funny. That's all the Sandler fan asks for and that is all that “Grown Ups delivers.” Success, it seems, is a highly subjective concept.

Movie Review The Dilemma

The Dilemma (2011) 

Directed by Ron Howard

Written by Allan Loeb

Starring Vince Vaughn, Kevin James, Winona Ryder, Jennifer Connelly, Channing Tatum

Release Date January 14th, 2011

Published January 14th, 2011 

Yeah, yeah, yeah, my job is to talk about the movie “The Dilemma” but I'm not so much interested in this movie as I am in the fact that Jennifer Connelly, excuse me, OSCAR WINNER JENNIFER CONNELLY, is the fourth lead in a bad romantic comedy. This, I guess, shouldn't be news; she was after all the sixth lead in the far worse romantic crime “He's Just Not That into You,” but the sad trajectory of Connelly's career since her Oscar win for “A Beautiful Mind” is a strong parallel to the struggles of this well meaning but failing movie.

In “The Dilemma” Jennifer Connelly plays a Chef who is living with Vince Vaughn's typical commitment-phobic smooth talker, this time named Ronnie. It is Ms. Connelly's job to look concerned and be constantly confused by Mr. Vaughn's increasingly bizarre actions related possibly to a gambling problem he's had for years. That's what Connelly's Beth thinks anyway. Sadly, Ms. Connelly is introduced and then forced to the sidelines for most of the second act before returning for the third act in an even more diminished and forgettable fashion. 

The reality is that Ronnie has discovered that his best friend's wife, Geneva (Winona Ryder), is sneaking around with a young, tattooed stud (Channing Tatum) . Ronnie discovered the secret but when he confronted Geneva about it she threatened to lie and say Ronnie has been flirting with her. Geneva also has a blackmail secret that she hangs over Ronnie's head but none of this really matters, it's merely a way to keep the plot wheels spinning after the 'Dilemma' of the title is revealed.

Thus Ronnie sets about trying to tell Nick (Kevin James) that Geneva is cheating on him without actually telling him. This leads to a lot of sitcom level shenanigans where Ronnie tries to manufacture a scenario where Nick can catch Geneva in the act, thus relieving him of the burden of this secret. That idea has comic invention to it but it never elicits any laughs. Instead, the turgid direction of Ron Howard and Vince Vaughn's sweaty, shifty performance make the movie feel desperate as it fails to get laugh after laughter and potential laugh. 

Failing to find a tone between comedy and drama, “The Dilemma” flails about between the professional direction of Ron Howard and Vince Vaughn's sad attempts to continue his aging brand of fast talking, Peter Pan Complex humor. Certainly there is a middle ground between Howard and Vaughn but they never find it here and their styles clash like a head on collision.

The styles clash in the career of Jennifer Connelly have come as she has tried to keep one hand in the mainstream in films like “The Hulk” and “Dark Water” and one in the world of serious dramas with roles in “Little Children,” “House of Sand and Fog” and “Reservation Road.” Neither path has worked for Connelly, now she finds herself fourth name down below stars with half her talent.

Maybe it was the decision to suborn herself to the girlfriend role in “The Hulk, thus showing herself willing to accept less than equal billing with male co-stars of lesser star power, or maybe it was the failure of her first solo lead in “Dark Water,” something caused Jennifer Connelly to stop believing in herself and begin believing that she deserves 5th wheel roles like Beth in “The Dilemma.”

Before the release of “The Dilemma” I wrote a piece on the ‘Dilemma’ facing Vince Vaughn as his aging man-boy persona begins to fade. A similar dilemma seems to be afflicting Ms. Connelly except that she seems far more accepting of her sad fate. You can see it in her listless performance in “The Dilemma” and in her acceptance of material that would likely leave any actress a little bored.

Ms. Connelly you are better than this. Stop letting Hollywood dictate to you that you are not strong enough for anything more than the 4th lead in a crappy movie like “The Dilemma.” Flash that hardware around and find some indie movie producer who can give you the kinds of roles that excite you in ways this role clearly does not.

Movie Review Paul Blart Mall Cop

Paul Blart Mall Cop (2009) 

Directed by Steve Carr 

Written by Kevin James, Nick Bakay

Starring Kevin James, Jayma Mayes, Raini Rodriguez 

Release Date January 16th, 2009 

Published January 15th, 2009 

Similar to my recent review of My Bloody Valentine 3D, I love surprises. I never imagined a movie about a doughy mall cop would be anything other than a waste of time. Once again, I am happy to be proven wrong. Paul Blart Mall Cop is a goofball movie but it's one terrific goof.

Kevin James stars as the titular Mall Cop. Paul is a guy who has failed in his attempt to become a New Jersey State Trooper 7 times. Paul is hypoglycemic and when he doesn't get enough sugar he passes out cold. This condition has doomed Paul to nearly a decade as a mall security guard.

Good natured Paul takes his role very seriously, tracking mall traffic patterns, pulling over oldsters on scooters for reckless riding, and training new guards how to pretend they have a weapon. Despite his dedication and obvious sweetness, Paul is continuously taken advantage of and humiliated by shoppers and co-workers alike.

Nevertheless, with the help of a little Barry Manilow and a touch of Survivor, Paul always bounces back. Thus, when his mall is attacked by thieves with an overly elaborate and odd scheme, Paul becomes just the man to thwart them. Complicating matters are the hostages who include Paul's 12 year old daughter Maya (Raini Rodriguez) and the girl Paul has been crushing on for weeks, Amy (Jayma Mays).

Paul Blart Mall Cop was directed by Steve Carr, not a director known for skilled comic timing. His credits include the abysmal Eddie Murphy kiddie flick Daddy Day Care. Thankfully, the script was co-written by star Kevin James and comedian Nick Bakay who play off James's innate likability to sell a goofball PG action movie plot.

Early on, James and Bakay overdo Paul's many humiliations but once they get into the mall on black friday, things pick up and the Kevin James rolli polli charm offensive begins. Battling bad guys with guns, James is like a big tough teddy bear. He wins you over with his sweetness and then when he starts kicking butt you can barely hold back from cheering aloud.

I want to note that this film was produced by Adam Sandler who I feel has tried to make this movie before for himself and for others like Rob Schneider. Loud, violent with an ironic soundtrack and a bit with a dog. But, Sandler can't do it without delving into the dark side of his psyche where his taste for disgusting, bodily function humor and angry recrimination.

Where Sandler scores cheap points with his confident anger and bathroom humor, James is much smarter and more subtle. James does a Sandler movie without ever really indulging any Sandler-isms. No bathroom humor, just a sweet guy in a desperate situation whose reactions to this outlandish situation are where the jokes come from.

In the end, Kevin James is such a skilled and committed physical comic and such a winning personality that you can't help but laugh repeatedly with him and come to love the guy. Paul Blart Mall Cop is just pure fun.

Movie Review I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry

I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry (2007) 

Directed by Dennis Dugan 

Written by Barry Fanaro, Alexander Payne, Jim Taylor 

Starring Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Jessica Biel, Ving Rhames, Steve Buscemi, Dan Akroyd

Release Date July 20th, 2007

Published July 20th, 2007

For every little bit of progress Adam Sandler makes as an actor; he seems to take one step back. His performance earlier this year in the 9/11 drama Reign Over Me was a tremendous step forward for Sandler as an actor, if a bit of a step down from his usual box office stature. Like his very impressive turn in P.T Anderson's Punch Drunk Love which Sandler followed with the juvenile animated effort 8 Crazy Nights and the dull, unfunny rage of Anger Management, Sandler chooses to follow Reign Over Me with the childish attempt at P.C laughs in stereotypical clothes, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry.

Larry Valentine has a big problem. As a firefighter who rushes into the blaze to save lives, his life is often on the line. His work is very dangerous and with two kids at home to take care of, Larry wants to make sure they get his pension should something happen to him. Unfortunately, a paperwork snafu, in the wake of his wife's untimely death, has left Larry in a real bind. Should he be killed in action, his kids won't get his pension unless he gets married.

Unfortunately for Larry, there is only one person he would trust enough to make sure his kids were taken care of. his lifelong pal, Chuck Levine. This is where Larry crafts a real hairbrained scheme. Seeing a story in the paper about how the city of New York has legalized domestic partnerships for gay couples, Larry gets the idea to marry his pal Chuck.

Chuck is not exactly the ideal choice for this scam. He has a rather legendary reputation as a ladies man. In fact, when we first meet Chuck a pair of sexy twin sisters are fighting over him after he slept with both of them. Later, when Larry goes to tell Chuck his plan, he interrupts him while he is romancing several women at the same time.

Nevertheless, Chuck owes Larry his life after a fire call went bad, so he agrees and the two head for Canada to make it legal. Things get complicated when the city challenges the authenticity of their relationship and Larry hires a sexy lawyer named Alex (Jessica Biel) who immediately strikes a chord with Chuck and puts the whole scheme on thin ice.

This being a typical, brainless Adam Sandler effort you expect and get just about every stereotype known to man thrown in as comic asides. However, surprisingly enough, the biggest problem with I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry is not insensitivity, the film actually offers a pro gay agenda. Rather, the problem is much simpler than that. It's just not a very well made movie.

Directed by Adam Sandler's pet director Dennis Dugan (Big Daddy, Happy Gilmore), I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry never establishes a solid tone or any kind of charm. The film is crude and resorts more often to dull slapstick than to anything organically plot driven. The plot should be the focus, it's a big broad topic with many opportunities for satire. That, sadly, is well beyond the intellectual scope of Dugan and Sandler.

While there will be many who will be offended by the many stereotypes at use in I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, you will be surprised how fairminded and pro gay the film really is. Though the support is shallow because of the gutless direction of Dennis Dugan and the strip mined script by Sandler and Barry Fanaro, the film's heart is in the right place.

What really stinks is that you can see the potential for something a little more thoughtful, deeper and more satisfying. Jim Taylor and Alexander Payne, the team behind Election, About Schmidt and Sideways, delivered a version of this script that, those who have read it, say is sharper and more pointed in its humor and perspective. That version was flamed in favor of a more Sandler friendly version with all of the slapstick and self serving ego indulgences that are Sandler's hallmarks.

My biggest fear was that I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry would be a series of stereotypical jokes with a liberal use of the word f****t. Watching it, that is what we get. However, a heavy dose of positivity manages to balance things out in a very surprising way. That positive feeling however, is not enough to make the film funnier than it is or more believable than it is.

I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry suffers the ego of its star Adam Sandler who compromises much of what might have worked in the film in favor of fellating his own ego. What a shame, there was a good deal of potential here.

Movie Review Hitch

Hitch (2005) 

Directed by Andy Tennant

Written by Kevin Bisch

Staring Will Smith, Eva Mendes, Kevin James, Amber Valetta, Michael Rappaport, Adam Arkin

Release Date February 11th, 2005

Published February 9th, 2005

With his wit, style and natural charisma it's a wonder Will Smith waited this long to master the romantic comedy genre. In fact it's been five years, the ill-received drama The Legend Of Bagger Vance, since Smith has done a film without a weapon in his hand and an explosion at his back. Not since his breakthrough on TV's "Fresh Prince Of Bel Air" has Smith done anything close to a straight comedy. With his latest film Hitch, Smith shows that while practice may make perfect some just don't need it.

In New York City there is an urban legend about a guy so charming that he has taken to teaching other men to emulate his charms. This legend is known as the Date Doctor and while most don't believe he exists, he does in the form of Alex Hitchens, known as Hitch to his clients. The Date Doctor guarantees he can help any guy get any girl in three dates or less. Don't get the wrong idea, Hitch won't help a guy with a one night stand, only serious relationship-seekers need apply.

Oddly enough, the man who has made obtaining love for others his life does not believe in love for himself. That is until Hitch meets Sara (Eva Mendes), a cynical gossip columnist who ironically does not believe the Date Doctor exists. From her dates with Hitch she has no reason to believe it could be him as one disaster after the next intervenes to ruin each date. For some reason Hitch's natural charm fails him at every turn in terrifically disastrous romantic comedy fashion.

Because Sara doesn't believe there is such a person as a Date Doctor you have your natural romantic comedy obstacle: how will she react to finding out her new boyfriend is this mystical Date Doctor. First she has to find out and that is where Albert (Kevin James from TV's "King Of Queens") comes in. Albert is a lovable but socially inept accountant who has fallen head over heels for a supermodel named Allegra Cole (Amber Valletta). With Hitch's help Albert manages to get a date with Allegra which catches the attention of the gossip columnist and our plot kicks in.

Hitch is not exactly original in execution. The film has many, if not all, of the classic romantic comedy cliches. Director Andy Tennant knows those cliches backwards and forwards.  They are his bread and butter from the awful, cliche ridden Reese Witherspoon comedy Sweet Home Alabama to the slightly less repulsive Matthew Perry-Salma Hayek rom-com Fools Rush In. Tennant directs as if he has never known another way to tell a story.

What makes Hitch stand apart from other romantic comedies is star Will Smith and his love interest, the smoldering and sexy Eva Mendes. Where previous couplings in films directed by Andy Tennant have fizzled under the weight of his heavy handed direction, Smith and Mendes manage to float above the commonness of the film. They are helped greatly by James, who does much of the comic heavy lifting. With James shouldering the burden of the more tiresome and forced comic moments, Smith and Mendes are free to turn up the romantic heat with their sparkling chemistry.

Hitch is what it is-- genre fluff that succeeds, like all modern romantic comedies, on the star power of its cast and their ability to transcend even the most damningly familiar plot elements. Will Smith is more than star enough for the task.