Movie Review Rebound

Rebound (2005)

Directed by Steve Carr

Written by Jon Lucas, Scott Moore

Starring Martin Lawrence

Release Date July 1st, 2005 

Published July 2nd, 2005 

Director Steve Carr has a resume only a mother could love. From the dregs of Eddie Murphy's career, Dr. Doolittle 2 and Daddy Day Care, to the Chris Tucker free, as well as laugh free, Next Friday. For his latest flick, Rebound, Carr finally found a family movie Eddie Murphy could turn down. Call on the B team, Murphy's apparent new understudy Martin Lawrence. Desperate for a hit, Lawrence has turned to the genre to which Eddie sold his soul, the mildly offensive utterly forgettable family film.

Worse yet Rebound is a formula sports film with the requisite team of misfits who overcame odds to be champions. Ugh!

In Rebound Martin Lawrence plays coach Roy McCormick, a hotshot in either college or the pro's, the scripting is so poor we are not sure where Coach Roy is from. What we do know is that his ego is out of control. Coach Roy misses games for magazine photo shoots and his out of control temper, think Bobby Knight edited for a PG rating, have gotten him thrown out of the league.

There was an incident with a bird but the less said about that the better.

Lucky for Roy his agent; Tim Fink (Breckin Meyer), get it FINK (that joke would have killed on Happy Days), has found him a loophole. If Coach Roy can find another job and show himself to be a model citizen he can get back in the league. Enter the Smelters; a ragtag bunch of middle school ballers who are so bad they have not scored a point in a game, forget winning one.

The kids are somehow able to fax an offer directly to Roy's agent and he immediately accepts the job. The kids happen to attend Roy's old school where he first fell in love with the game. Golly; maybe Roy can find his love of basketball again and learn a valuable lesson about teamwork. And wouldn't you know it, one of the baby ballers happens to have a sexy single mom (Wendy Raquel Robinson) who has been assigned to keep an eye on Roy by the school's lackadaisical principle (Megan Mullally, far too talented for this).

If this sounds almost exactly like Mighty Ducks or 2001's long forgotten Hardball with Keanu Reeves or even the original Bad News Bears well; I gather it's supposed to. There is apparently someone in Hollywood in charge of recycling this plot every couple years when a down on his luck star needs a paycheck fast or when a young hack Director needs a product to pad his resume.

Director Steve Carr has the visual imagination of a blind squirrel. I take that back, a blind squirrel might get lucky and find something interesting to film once in a while, I hear they occasionally find a nut. Carr does have a handle on this genre's newest innovation, bathroom humor. In his Dr.Dolittle 2 it was animal noises, Daddy Care Care poo poo jokes and in Rebound we have a child who vomits under pressure.

Children apparently enjoy these jokes but a long term study of the effects of this type of humor on children finds our kids getting dumber and dumber every year. Something must be done damn it!

I am certain that Martin Lawrence was once funny. I remember laughing at something he did. It's just been a long while since Martin has done anything entertaining. His last few films are so abysmal that just listing them raises the bile in my throat. What's The Worst That Could Happen, Black Knight and National Security are cinematic flotsam that mark one of the worst career trainwrecks in Hollywood history.

That Rebound somehow manages to be even worse than what has come before in Lawrence's career is a stunning result. However, indeed it is worse and blindingly so. There is just nothing of any redeeming value in Rebound right down to the poor child actors. Not one of these supposed cute kids makes an impression beyond a vague sympathy for the fact that each will carry this pock mark on their resume the rest of their careers.

Formula filmmaking at its most insidious, Rebound makes me sad to be a film fan. If this is how Hollywood repays the loyal filmgoer it is no wonder that ticket sales are lower than expected. Forget cell phones, ticket prices, or people who talk during movies, the reason fewer people are going to the movies is garbage like Rebound that takes up space in so many multiplexes.

Movie Review Paul Blart Mall Cop

Paul Blart Mall Cop (2009) 

Directed by Steve Carr 

Written by Kevin James, Nick Bakay

Starring Kevin James, Jayma Mayes, Raini Rodriguez 

Release Date January 16th, 2009 

Published January 15th, 2009 

Similar to my recent review of My Bloody Valentine 3D, I love surprises. I never imagined a movie about a doughy mall cop would be anything other than a waste of time. Once again, I am happy to be proven wrong. Paul Blart Mall Cop is a goofball movie but it's one terrific goof.

Kevin James stars as the titular Mall Cop. Paul is a guy who has failed in his attempt to become a New Jersey State Trooper 7 times. Paul is hypoglycemic and when he doesn't get enough sugar he passes out cold. This condition has doomed Paul to nearly a decade as a mall security guard.

Good natured Paul takes his role very seriously, tracking mall traffic patterns, pulling over oldsters on scooters for reckless riding, and training new guards how to pretend they have a weapon. Despite his dedication and obvious sweetness, Paul is continuously taken advantage of and humiliated by shoppers and co-workers alike.

Nevertheless, with the help of a little Barry Manilow and a touch of Survivor, Paul always bounces back. Thus, when his mall is attacked by thieves with an overly elaborate and odd scheme, Paul becomes just the man to thwart them. Complicating matters are the hostages who include Paul's 12 year old daughter Maya (Raini Rodriguez) and the girl Paul has been crushing on for weeks, Amy (Jayma Mays).

Paul Blart Mall Cop was directed by Steve Carr, not a director known for skilled comic timing. His credits include the abysmal Eddie Murphy kiddie flick Daddy Day Care. Thankfully, the script was co-written by star Kevin James and comedian Nick Bakay who play off James's innate likability to sell a goofball PG action movie plot.

Early on, James and Bakay overdo Paul's many humiliations but once they get into the mall on black friday, things pick up and the Kevin James rolli polli charm offensive begins. Battling bad guys with guns, James is like a big tough teddy bear. He wins you over with his sweetness and then when he starts kicking butt you can barely hold back from cheering aloud.

I want to note that this film was produced by Adam Sandler who I feel has tried to make this movie before for himself and for others like Rob Schneider. Loud, violent with an ironic soundtrack and a bit with a dog. But, Sandler can't do it without delving into the dark side of his psyche where his taste for disgusting, bodily function humor and angry recrimination.

Where Sandler scores cheap points with his confident anger and bathroom humor, James is much smarter and more subtle. James does a Sandler movie without ever really indulging any Sandler-isms. No bathroom humor, just a sweet guy in a desperate situation whose reactions to this outlandish situation are where the jokes come from.

In the end, Kevin James is such a skilled and committed physical comic and such a winning personality that you can't help but laugh repeatedly with him and come to love the guy. Paul Blart Mall Cop is just pure fun.

Movie Review: Are We Done Yet?

Are We Done Yet? (2007) 

Directed by Steve Carr

Written by Hank Nelken 

Starring Ice Cube, Nia Long, Phillip Bolden, Aleisha Allen, John C. McGinley 

Release Date April 4th, 2007

Published April 3rd, 2007 

2005's Are We There Yet(?) was a meanspirited, ugly attempt at 'family comedy'. Featuring crotch shots aplenty, nasty physical humor and ugly characters, Are We There Yet(?) set new lows for an already shallow genre. Yet, despite the films massive and obvious flaws there is now a sequel and since it would nearly impossible for this film to be worse than the original, Are We Done Yet? is better than its predecessor.

Oh, don't get me wrong, Are We Done Yet(?) is not a good movie, even by comparison, it's merely an improvement. If you consider compost an improvement over yard waste.

In Are We There Yet? Nick Person (Ice Cube) wanted to do a favor for a beautiful woman, Suzanne (Nia Long). Offering to drive her two demon children, Lindsey (Aleisha Allen) and Kevin (Phillip Bolden), to there fathers for the weekend, Nick endures unending abuse and bad behavior. Then again, he was only offering to help so he could get with the hot girl so; his motives weren't just about being a good Samaritan.

Cut to two years later and apparently Nick's gesture was a winner because he and Suzanne are married and the demon children are now his loving step kids. Having given up his sports collectibles shop, Nick has gone into the publishing biz, starting his own sports magazine where he hopes an interview with Magic Johnson can get his magazine off to a splashy start. (No points for guessing Magic will figure in to the wackiness of the films ending.)

Living in Nick's cramped bachelor pad is clearly not working, no explanation is given about why they just didn't move into the beautiful home Suzanne owned in the previous film. Needing a new home, the family heads for the country where a gorgeous old fixer upper, 3 bedroom, 2 bath, home awaits. When I say fixer upper, I am understating quite a bit. Though the real estate agent, Chuck (John C. McGinley) calls it homey and rustic, the place is clearly a dump from moment one.

Nevertheless Nick and the family move and naturally, the house begins to fall apart around them. Luckily, the crook who sold them the house is also the only licensed contractor, electrician and housing inspector in the area. Soon Chuck is living with the family and sitcomic wackiness has ensued. I'll say this for Are We Done Yet(?), at least, it is far less mean spirited than its progenitor Are We There Yet(?). That film combined an awful plot with these awful characters to create an awful moviegoing experience. The children were reprehensible, even by the standards of behavior set for movie children, coming up just short of being horror film villains in this alleged family movie.  

Are We Done Yet(?) softens the child characters from potential murderers to irritating clichés. They remain only plot devices for tweaking the always on edge Nick character but; at the very least, I don't hate them as much. Yes, I said I hated them. I realize, that to hate children is pretty extreme but if you were forced to sit through Are We There Yet? as I was, you would have hated them to. Them, their parents, their parents parents and many others.

It would have been impossible for Are We Done Yet(?) not to improve upon Are We There Yet(?) but improvement is a relative term. If getting hit by a car is an improvement over getting hit by a Mack truck. Or if getting stabbed is an improvement on being shot, then yes, improvement is the right word here. Are We Done Yet? is still an exceedingly bad movie with a rote plot and mindless characters but I will take it over the toxic poison of the previous film.

Movie Review: Daddy Day Care

Daddy Day Care (2003)

Directed by Steve Carr 

Written by Geoff Rodkey 

Starring Eddie Murphy, Jeff Garlin, Steve Zahn, Regina King, Anjelica Huston 

Release Date May 9th, 2003 

Published May 10th, 2003 

How many times can one actor be written off? If you’re Eddie Murphy, apparently as many times as you can make a movie. Every time Eddie comes out with a film it's greeted by cynics in my profession as his last chance to be a big star. And each time, Eddie comes back. Eddie has found the back door to maintaining a waning career. He has sold his cool action-comedy persona and adopted a kid-friendly persona that has proven to a career salvation. His latest by-the-numbers kid friendly flick is Daddy Day Care, a rote family comedy, factory produced by the Hollywood machine.

In Daddy Day Care, Murphy is Charlie, an ad executive who loses his job after a product he was working on tanks badly with test audiences (how amazingly ironic). Left at home waiting for responses to his resume, Charlie gets to spend some much needed private time with his son Ben (Khamani Griffin). One day Charlie takes Ben to the park and has a conversation with a mom desperate for a new day care center. With this inspiration and the help of a friend who also lost his job, Phil (Jeff Garlin, “Curb Your Enthusiasm”), Charlie opens a day care center in his home.

Regina King plays Charlie's wife though it's difficult to tell as she disappears as quickly as she's introduced. Steve Zahn rounds out the cast as a doofy assistant with a fetish for Star Trek and a knack for dealing with kids. Speaking of the kids, none of the little actors makes much of an impression beyond being cute.

The setup is so simple it must have taken all of an hour to think of and write down. Well known personality is paired with a group of cute kids. We haven't seen this teaming but, oh, a dozen or so times, and Daddy Day Care doesn't have much of anything new to add to this familiar story. Even the great Anjelica Huston can't do anything to make this film interesting with her role as the film’s villainous pre-school owner Ms. Harridan. Get it, harridan, oh so clever.

Daddy Day Care isn't offensive, it's not poorly made and to it's credit it doesn't overdo the bathroom humor that has become a staple of similar films. Director Steve Carr, who previously directed Murphy in Dr. Dolittle, shows once again that he is a technically proficient director in that he knows where to point the camera and shoot. That said he brings little else to this uninteresting and overly familiar movie.