Movie Review Challengers

Challengers (2024) 

Directed by Luca Guadagnino 

Written by Justin Kuritzkes 

Starring Zendaya, Mike Faist, Josh O'Connor 

Release Date April 26th, 2024

Published April 26th, 2024 

Sexuality is non-binary. Full stop. Sexuality is a spectrum on which we all exist. The notion of straight or gay as a binary dynamic of sexuality is outdated to the point of being silly. That's not to say that people's desires, what turns them on, can't be just one thing that happens to adhere to the notion of straight or gay, it's merely an acknowledgment that sexuality for anyone can be a fluid concept depending on circumstance. This opening paragraph is triggering a lot of straight men, I can feel the discomfort as they click away in anger. 

Challengers is a rare film that explores the idea of sexuality as a spectrum. The three protagonists of Challengers, two men and a woman, have a brief, exploratory experience that gets at the heart of how circumstantial sexual preference can be. The film also reframes what sex can be in an orgasmic final showdown that reveals these three characters true desires in a fast paced, eye-catching, and breathtaking final few minutes. Director Luca Guadagnino appears to be making the case that anything can be sex its if the circumstances align. 

Challengers stars Zendaya as Tashi Duncan, a tennis prodigy caught up in a love triangle with a pair of fellow prodigies. Art Donaldson (Mike Faist) and Patrick Zweig (Josh O'Connor) have been friends since their early teen years spent at a tennis academy. Both are gifted players in very different ways. Art is methodical and well practiced, Patrick gets by on brut strength and determination, along with an unusual serve. The two young men compliment each other and when each falls for Tashi, it becomes not unlike a tennis match filled with strategic points and breaks. 

But Tashi is no mere ball at play among these two players. She's their coach, teaching them both the game. Literally, she becomes Art's Coach as his career advances while Patrick seeks her as a Coach later in his career. The film shifts through time effortlessly layering in the story to build toward that remarkable final act tennis match where Art and Patrick are playing the game of their lives with Tashi acting as mastermind and the prize for the winner while losing herself in the excitement of tennis. 

For Tashi, life is tennis. Her relationship with Patrick falls apart when he refuses to talk about tennis while the two are becoming intimate. Her relationship and eventual marriage to Art is tethered in part to his success on the tennis court and she's not afraid to tell him that if he can't maintain his high standard of play, she will lose interest and leave him. This constant pressure from Tashi has made Art one of the most successful players in tennis, a grand slam winner, and a favorite for the upcoming U.S Open. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Asphalt City

Asphalt City (2024) 

Directed by Jean Stephane Sauvaire 

Written by Ryan King, Ben Mac Brown

Starring Tye Sheridan, Sean Penn, Mike Tyson, Kali Reis, Michael Pitt 

Release Date March 29th, 2024 

Published March 28th, 2024 

Asphalt City is the kind movie that mistakes wallowing in misery for drama. The film about a rookie EMT in New York City wallows in the bleak misery of suffering that, I am sure, will feel like gritty drama to some but felt punishing for this critic. I don't mind a good wallow, I was a big fan of Scorsese's similarly themed Bringing Out the Dead years ago, but I have my limits and Asphalt City pushed well past my limit for desolation that borders on post-apocalyptic. I realize New York City can be an angry and dark place but this borders on pornographic in terms of misery. 

Asphalt City stars Tye Sheridan as Ollie Cross a wide-eyed medical student whose paying his way through med-school by working as an EMT in New York City. Struggling with a terrible partner who hates rookies, Cross's spirits are buoyed when he's reassigned to work with an aging veteran, Gene 'Rut' Rutkovsky. Rut takes pity on the kid and sets about teaching him the job instead of just screaming orders at him. Where his previous partner, played by Michael Pitt, appeared intent on running Cross out of the job, Rut seems to take to being a mentor. 

This doesn't however, give the movie a boost in terms of the pitch black ugliness at play. Even as Rut proves to be kind, the runs they make in their ambulance are unendingly grim. EMT's deal with a lot of horrors but Asphalt City makes the job appear like the seventh circle of hell at all times. It's to the point that I just can't believe anyone would be able to do this job and since we have EMT's currently working in New York City, I can only imagine that they have found some way to preserve their mental health. This movie makes being an EMT akin to trying to survive Cormac McCarthy's The Road. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review In the Land of Saints and Sinners

In the Land of Saints and Sinners (2024) 

Directed by Robert Lorenz

Written by Mark Michael McNally, Terry Loane

Starring Liam Neeson, Kerry Condon, Colm Meaney, Ciaran Hinds

Release Date March 29th, 2024

Published March 27th, 2024

The opening moments of the Irish thriller, In the Land of Sinners and Saints is a breathtaking piece of suspense. Members of the I.RA have just planted a bomb outside of a pub. But, just as they are about to make their escape, a family, with very young children pauses in front of the pub so that one of the children can tie their shoe. One of the bombers screams in an attempt to get the family to move but they appear confused by the screaming one and stay rooted in place. The bomb goes off and it's clear that this family has been killed. 

It's a principal laid out by Alfred Hitchcock, the explosion isn't nearly as exciting as the ticking bomb itself. The tension isn't the damage that the bomb will do, it's heated seconds until the bomb does what we know a bomb can do that matters in a movie. We don't see this family get murdered and we don't need to, the horror is greater in our mind by implication than it would be if we saw blood and body parts splattered on pavement. 

Don't get me wrong, gore and bloodshed has its place and, in the right hands, it has been effective, but that's a different genre of film altogether than what In the Land of Sinners and Saints is going for. This is a cerebral thriller that builds its emotional tension underneath, allowing it to simmer and grow into a boil before exploding. As directed by Robert Lorenz, that simmering is compelling and the boil is riveting. Then, we wait with our breath caught and our hearts pounding as we anticipate the explosion to come. 

Liam Neeson stars in In the Land of Saints and Sinners as Finbar, a hitman who comforts himself with the notion that he only kills bad people for money. Finbar has killed a lot of people, hiding their bodies under freshly planted trees in a forest near his small cottage. Finbar has reached a point where he'd like to retire, give up killing, and take up a hobby like gardening. He also has his eye on a neighbor at a nearby cottage who is soon to be a widow. The pair have a sad chemistry that could become love. 

But, this is a world of consequence and the consequences of Finbar's choices are that happily ever after is highly unlikely for him. His potential happily ever after is soon threatened by the arrival of four newcomers in his village. Remember the terrorists from the opening sequence, they are hiding out in a nearby farmhouse. One of them has taken to abusing and harassing a young girl whose mother runs Finbar's favorite pub. Seeing that the girl is afraid to go home at night, Finbar intervenes. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Lisa Frankenstein

Lisa Frankenstein (2024) 

Directed by Zelda Williams

Written by Diablo Cody 

Starring Kathryn Newton, Cole Sprouse 

Release Date February 9th, 2024 

Published February 12th, 2024 

Lisa is an awkward teenager who has been through terrible trauma. Lisa's mother was murdered by an ax murderer. Now, as we join her story, she's living in the suburbs, her father has remarried to a shrewish, bitter woman, played by Carla Gugino, and Lisa is struggling to fit in. At the very least, her new sister, Taffy (Liza Soberano), is sweet and supportive, to a point. Where Lisa is awkward and an outcast, Taffy is a popular cheerleader with everyone at school fawning over her. Of course, Lisa doesn't make fitting in easy for herself. Lisa's favorite thing to do in her new hometown is to hang out in a decrepit cemetery. 

There, Lisa makes art and chats with the dead. One gravestone in particular, that of a man named Frankenstein, featuring a marble bust of the man's handsome face, catches Lisa's attention more than the others. She decorates this grave and leaves gifts including her late mother's rosary. Thus, when Frankenstein's grave is struck by lightning and the man in the grave bursts back to life, he comes searching for his new friend. Lisa is perhaps the only person who could take this sort of development in stride, after a brief comic chase around her house as she thinks The Creature, as he's known in the credits, played by Cole Sprouse tries desperately to explain who he is without words. 

Click here for my review 

Movie Review Argylle

Argylle (2024) 

Directed by Matthew Vaughn 

Written by Jason Fuchs 

Starring Bryce Dallas Howard, Sam Rockwell, Henry Cavill, Bryan Cranston, John Cena, Ariana Debose, Dua Lipa, Samuel L. Jackson, Catherine O'Hara

Release Date February 2nd, 2024

Published February 1st, 2024

The high concept premise of Argylle is relatively simple: what would happen if the spy novels written by an unassuming, shut-in, bestselling author, became a reality that forces the writer into the real life world of espionage, violence, and betrayal. Bryce Dallas Howard stars as the hapless best selling author Elly Conway. Elly's high flying spy adventure Argylle has become a worldwide phenomenon all while Elly lives a peaceful, slightly lonely, existence at a lakeside home far from the crowds of admiring readers. Elly's idyllic life of writing and spending time with her beloved cat, Alfie, is upended when she can't think of a final chapter for her fifth book in the Argylle series. 

Suffering from severe writer's block, Elly boards an Amtrak train headed to see her mother, Ruth (Catherine O'Hara) who she hopes will help her snap back into writing mode. Unfortunately, Elly is not going to make it home to mom. On her train ride, Elly finds herself in the company of Aiden (Sam Rockwell), a real life spy who saves Elly's life from a series of attempted assassinations aboard this moving train. Bodies pile up fast as Aiden whipsaws about the train snapping necks and shooting baddies right in the heart while he saves Elly and Alfie from assassination. 

As Aiden will eventually explain, Elly's books are somehow mirroring real world, geo-political situations in which a rogue spy agency is trying outwit a group of good guy spies working to protect the world. Caught in the middle, Elly doesn't know who to trust, Aiden and his CIA pal, played  by Samuel L. Jackson, or the head of a rival group of spies who Elly may or may not already be familiar with. It's a terrific premise and it's all building to a pretty nifty twist until director Matthew Vaughn twists us one too many times leading to a flat finish for an otherwise fleet footed action flick. 

Click here for my review 

Movie Review The Underdoggs

The Underdoggs (2024) 

Directed by Charles Stone III

Written by Danny Segal, Isaac Schamis 

Starring Snoop Dogg, Tika Sumpter, Mike Epps 

Release Date January 26th, 2024 

Published January 25th, 2024 

I know it's wrong. I am well aware that the new Amazon Prime-Snoop Dogg comedy, The Underdoggs is objectively, not a good movie. It's amateurish, it's childish, it's derivative, and it's needlessly filthy for a movie that features a mostly child cast. And yet, there is this undeniable element that I cannot deny and that is my affection for Snoop Dogg. Snoop has crafted one of the more eclectic and straight up odd careers in entertainment history. He was a fearsome gangsta rapper who may or may not have been involved in actual murders. He's also a close friend and partner to Martha Stewart. He's known for smoking more weed than your average small American city and is one of the most savvy marketers of his brand going today. He's an enigma, a dynamic, charming and entirely unpredictable character. 

It's that same unpredictable, enigmatic charm that Snoop brings to his first film leading role since the failed horror franchise Bones in 2001, Snoop has a laid back charisma that I find irresistible. Snoop is Jaycen Two J's Jennings in The Underdoggs, a disgraced former NFL Wide Receiver better known for his bad behavior than his on the field heroics. In a classic Mighty Ducks scenario, Jaycen gets himself into an accident that is entirely his fault and is sentenced to community service. In this case, Jaycen is sentenced to cleaning up a park in his old neighborhood in Long Beach. While cleaning up dog poop, Jaycen sees a group of kids playing Pee-Wee Football, badly. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Miller's Girl

Miller's Girl (2024) 

Directed by Jade Halley Bartlett 

Written by Jade Halley Bartlett 

Starring Jenna Ortega, Martin Freeman, Dagmara Dominiczyk 

Release Date January 26th, 2024 

Published January 25th, 2024 

Ewwwww! The ick is a big feeling throughout the new melodrama, Miller's Girl, an erudite and empty exploration of sexual desire between a teacher and a student. Starring It-Girl Jenna Ortega, Miller's Girl is a double entendre. The title refers to both author Henry Miller and his endlessly horny catalog of books and the character played by Martin Freeman, a teacher named Jonathan Miller who is drawn to his student, played by Ortega. It's not a particularly clever double meaning but it's a good try. A lot of filmmakers don't even bother making their title matter to their movie, so, there's that. 

Jenna Ortega stars in Miller's Girl as Cairo Sweet, a wise beyond her years High Schooler. Jaded and bored by her Tennessee hometown, and her absent parents, Cairo spends her time reading and developing her skills as a writer. Her hard work pays off when she shows her writing to her new Literature teacher, Mr. Miller (Freeman). Miller is immediately taken with Cairo's writing. That said, he's also impressed with her personal reading which happens to include his only published book. If you are thinking that he's being set up, stop reading ahead! 

At home, Mr. Miller is struggling as a writer and a husband. His marriage to Beatrice, a far more successful and prolific author than her husband, is on the rocks. Desperately horny, Mr. Miller can't seem to get his wife away from her publisher long enough for a makeout session and a handjob, let alone the kind of passionate lovemaking that defined the early years of their marriage. Thus, Mr. Miller is ripe for a young woman who reads Henry Miller and proves capable of writing with just as much flushed, engorged, and filthy prose as Henry Miller himself. 

Click here for my review 

Movie Review Monkey Man

Monkey Man (2024) 

Directed by Dev Patel 

Written by Dev Patel, Paul Angunawela 

Starring Dev Patel, Pitobash, Sharlto Copley, Vipin Sharma 

Release Date April 5th, 2024 

Published April 8th, 2024 

Monkey Man is bathed in cool. Dev Patel's directorial palette is blood red, it's sweat soaked and bruised. It's Dev Patel's first time behind the camera and he directs the confidence of someone who has done this all of his life. It's beyond impressive, it's epic. This guy just gets it, camera placement, pacing, his use of color and music. But he also gets the emotion of cinema. Weaving a story about a boy losing his mother through his blood-soaked and battered action flick. Monkey Man is a punk rock action flick with a Bollywood soul, and a genuine, big beating heart. 

Monkey Man stars Dev Patel Kid, sometimes Bobby, and always Monkey Man. As a boy, Kid grew up in a lush, green forest. He spent days chasing his mother around the surrounding hills, falling asleep in her arms at night as she weaved epic tales of a Hanuman, the devoted warrior companion of Rama. In these incredible stories, the heroics of Hamuman resonate in the young Kid's mind, how Hanuman, the Monkey Man, led glorious victories on behalf of Rama. These stories are the foundation of Kid's moral core, one that will be tested and forged in fire, blood, and broken bones. 

The story of Haniman is inspiring, but the story of the Kid, will not be inspiring. It begins with our Monkey Man in a fight pit giving up his blood and teeth for a few bucks. This underground fight club, overseen by Tiger (Sharlto Copley), affords Kid the chance to lose but earn a few extra bucks from helping to fix the fight in favor of Tiger's chosen champion. Those extra bucks aren't enough to lift Kid out of poverty. But this is poverty with purpose. Kid, is saving his pennies for the chance at vengeance. He's using what little money he earns to build toward his roaring rampage of revenge. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review The Listener

The Listener (2024) 

Directed by Steve Buscemi 

Written by Alessandro Camon 

Starring Tessa Thompson, Rebecca Hall 

Release Date March 29th, 2024

Published March 26th, 2024

The Listener stars Tessa Thompson as the employee of a suicide hotline. A former drug addict, a few years removed from a prison sentence 'Beth,' as she calls herself on the calls she takes, uses her personal experience to relate to the numerous people who call her for a listening ear. Beth works the overnight shift, the busiest time of the day for potential suicides. The calls she takes take a toll on her, but she stays at it because she knows what it is like to be at the lowest of lows. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Arcadian

Arcadian (2024) 

Directed by Ben Brewer

Written by Michael Nilon 

Starring Nicolas Cage, Jaeden Martell, Maxwell Jenkins, Sadie Soverall

Release Date April 12th, 2024 

Published April 10th, 2024

Arcadian stars Nicolas Cage as Paul. In a post-apocalyptic world, Paul is among the lucky few who escaped devastated cities for the relative peace of the countryside. He's managed to do this while carrying to babies, Joseph and Thomas. Are they his children? We don't know for sure, we never see the mother. Paul could very well have rescued these two babies and is taking them to safety. Regardless, it's a demonstration of character and fortitude that, in a post-apocalypse beset by monsters, that anyone would rescue and raise not one but two babies. 

After we roll the opening credits we jump ahead to Joseph and Thomas as teenagers learning from Paul how to be self-sufficient and stay alive in the post-apocalypse. The trio live on a farm, far from the ravaged cities but the beasts, be they aliens or some other sort of monster, are now coming for them. Having assumedly taken what they can from the large cities and suburbs, the desperate monsters are learning and adapting, they are figuring out how to get around the defenses that Paul and his sons have built on the farm. 

What do we know about the monsters? They don't go out in daylight. In fact, it appears that the sun harms them. They also have fearsome claws that, over time, can scratch through even the biggest wooden door. This wasn't always the case. Nor was it always the case that these monsters would try and dig holes, but this appears to be happening as documented by Joseph (Jaeden Martell), who has become fascinated with studying the monsters, charting their evolution and learning about their weaknesses and way to fight them. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Origin

Origin (2024) 

Directed by Ava Duvernay

Written by Ava Duvernay

Starring Anjanue Ellis-Taylor, Jon Bernthal, Vera Farmiga, Isha Blaaker

Release Date January 25th, 2024 

Published January 25th, 2024 

Origin is a big project. Adapting a non-fiction story tracking the origin of racial discrimination via the history of the caste system worldwide, is not an easy task. It's a roiling beast of a project that director Ava Duvernay is perhaps the only filmmaker could attempt to tame and tease into a familiar film drama. The book, Caste: The Origins of Our Discontent, a bestseller for writer Isabel Wilkerson, is a deeply academic, research heavy effort that is far from the most natural book to be turned into a dramatic feature film. Director Ava Duvernay had to give a dramatic shape to the story and she found that shape in the author's life story. 

Aunjanue Ellis-Taylor stars in Origin as Isabel Wilkerson, an author struggling with the idea for her next book. She wants to chart the origin of racism in America but her research slowly takes her in a new direction. What she finds is that racism isn't as simple as white people hating black people, though that is a big part of it. Rather, the true roots of racism are often economic in nature. The need for a class of people who exist to do the work that others don't wish to do leads to the owning class to create a caste system in which particular members of a culture are chosen to be that class of people who will perform tasks. 

Leaders in these cultures quickly realized that they could create the workers they needed by exploiting racial and religious differences. Demonizing people for the color of their skin or by the difference in their religious beliefs proved to be an effective way to find a cheap, pliable workforce, groups of people who have no option but to accept poor treatment, low wages, and terrible working conditions, just for the chance to survive. Thus, confronting racial differences required more than overcoming a specific prejudice based on color, it requires dismantling economic systems that have been constructed over hundreds of years that thrived off of this forced labor based on discrimination. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media. 

Movie Review The First Omen

The First Omen (2024)

Directed by Arkasha Stevenson 

Written by Tim Smith, Arkasha Stevenson, Keith Thomas 

Starring Nell Tiger Free, Sonia Braga, Ralph Inseson, Bill Nighy

Release Date April 5th, 2024

Published April 5th, 2024 

The First Omen isn't so much of a movie as it is a widget. I mean widget in its first definition, not the internet definition. The First Omen is a product created by a committee who were given budget and a deadline and told to create a sellable product. The people who made it may be of the highest talent and may create a terrific product, but there is no escaping the widget comparison. If The First Omen were not connected to a studio owned franchise, it would not exist and the people who made it, likely would never have worked together. A studio had a product that it wanted made. The studio chose a product manager, a team lead, and a group of people to run the factory floor and they crafted a product for consumption in the market place. 

You can say, that's most movies, and I don't disagree with you. But, you can sense when someone is making a passionate work of art, a deep expression coming from the soul of a genuine artist. And, you can tell when someone is tasked with producing a widget, when they are accomplishing an assignment with a budget and deadline and not a work of a passionate soul. This is not to simply say that by its nature, The First Omen is a bad movie, it's not poorly made. It's a terrific widget. But a widget will never be a transcendent work of art. It will always be a functional mass produced consumer product, no matter how good the effort was to create it. 

The First Omen stars Nell Tiger Free as Sister Margaret, a troubled young Nun who has come to Rome at the behest of her loving mentor, Cardinal Lawrence (Bill Nighy). Cardinal Lawrence was once a humble Priest who helped Margaret survive a difficult childhood in a Massachusetts orphanage. Now, he's using his power as a Cardinal in Vatican City to get Margaret a place at a church run orphanage in Rome, in 19171. It's a heady change for Margaret who turned to God after growing up tormented so badly by visions that she thought she might lose her mind. She still occasionally has horrific visions of the abuse her mind tells her did not actually occur. 

Find my full length review at Horror.Media 

Movie Review Roadhouse

Road House (2024) 

Directed Doug Liman 

Written by Charles Mondry, Anthony Bagarozzi 

Starring Jake Gyllenhaal, Conor MacGregor 

Release Date March 21st, 2024

Published March 25th, 2024

Imagine if someone tried to remake The Room without Tommy Wiseau. Imagine if they tried to take Wiseau's premise and treat it with seriousness and make it into a serious drama? Would it even still be The Room? No, the magic would be gone. It would be a boring soap opera. No, the magic of The Room is the unique alchemy that emerges from when Tommy Wiseau's outsized ambition crashes headlong into his complete lack of talent and is forged in the fire of his self-delusion. You cannot remake that. You cannot recapture that kind of magic. 

Roadhouse is like The Room. The magic of Roadhouse comes from the unique alchemy of director Rowdy Herrington's love of sleazy bars with sticky, beer soaked floors, holes in the walls from errant fists, and from Patrick Swayze's unmatched ability to be bizarrely emotionally detached and fully physically present in every scene. His Zen bouncer is a miscalculation in theory but in practice, it is cheeseball comic gold. He's funny but only because he has no idea that he's funny. The joy or Roadhouse is how deeply dedicated Swayze and everyone else is to this sleazy, cheeseball nonsense. 

In remaking Roadhouse, the fun is completely lost in favor of a desire to be taken seriously. The premise is played straight with the fun sucked out almost entirely. A deeply bored Jake Gyllenhaal replaces Swayze's Zen and so much is lost in that translation. Gyllenhaal is too good of an actor to understand the glorious silliness of being a Zen bouncer fighting rednecks over control of a small Kansas town. Instead of trying to be above it, Gyllenhaal just comes of bemused and self-satisfied and that's just not fun at all. Plus, he doesn't rip out a single throat. Not one. 

Road House begins in bizarre fashion, establishing that no one knows what they are doing here. Gyllenhaal's Dalton shows up at a bar where they hold an unsanctioned fight club. There, a bruiser, played in cameo by Post Malone, has fought and defeated 6 men. Dalton is set to be next but the bruiser smartly bows out, refusing to fight Dalton because he knows who Dalton is. He's also just fought 6 other people and is bleeding and exhausted. So, instead of establishing Dalton as a man of honor and toughness, he comes off as an opportunist and a coward. Not the best way to introduce our hero. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media

Movie Review Immaculate

Immaculate (2024) 

Directed by Michael Mohan 

Written by Andrew Lobel 

Starring Sydney Sweeney, Alvaro Morte 

Release Date March 22nd, 2024 

Published March 26th, 2024 

Great directors know that all aspects of filmmaking matter. The script, the aesthetic, the music, the sound, it's all important to creating a truly great movie. First time director Michael Mohan demonstrates control over all aspects of filmmaking in his exceptional debut feature, Immaculate. The story of a Nun who is tricked into moving to Italy and into an ancient nunnery with a deep, dark, secret, Immaculate uses the tools of filmmaking exceptionally well. Most notably, the film's impeccable sound design puts the horror in your head in an inescapable fashion. 

Immaculate stars Sydney Sweeney as Sister Cecilia. At the age of 8, Cecilia fell through the ice in her hometown and nearly died. From that day, she dedicated herself to God and the search to find the reason God spared her. Now a nun, Sister Cecilia has recently lost her home parish in Detroit, Michigan. Fate intervened on her behalf as just as she was looking for a place to continue her path with God, Father Sal Tedeschi (Alvaro Morte), found her and offered her a place in an ancient Italian convent. 

This particular convent serves a very important purpose. The nuns here administer to elderly nuns in hospice. It will be Sister Cecilia's job to help make her sisters comfortable as they reach the end of their lives. At least, that's what the job is supposed to be. Unfortunately, shortly after her arrival in Italy, Sister Cecilia falls ill. The illness takes hold and is a complete mystery until it is revealed that Sister Cecilia is pregnant. This comes as a shock to all as Cecilia is unquestionably a virgin. This leads her fellow Nuns and Father Sal to claim she is undergoing a miraculous Virgin birth. 

Plot mechanics tell you that not all is as it appears. There is a sinister element of Immaculate that we are aware of from the start of the film but that is kept from Sister Cecilia. The film opens with a terrifying sequence as a young Nun is attempting to escape from the convent. As she is just about to slip through a gate, a group of Nuns in terrifying, faceless masks capture her. I will leave to see the movie to see what happens next. I will only say that it took my breath away for a moment. It's a terrific sequence and sets up the rest of Immaculate incredibly well. 

Find my full length review at Horror.Media 

Movie Review Madame Web

Madame Web (2024)

Directed by S.J Clarkson 

Written by Matt Sazama, Burk Sharpless, Claire Parker, S.J Clarkson 

Starring Dakota Johnson, Adam Scott, Sydney Sweeney, Isabela Merced, Celeste O'Connor 

Release Date February 14th, 2024 

Published February 16th, 2024

Madame Web is a uniquely misconceived superhero flick. Part Morbius, part Catwoman, and all terrible, this Dakota Johnson led adventure in Sony's Wish.com version of the Marvel Universe is stunningly terrible. It's the kind of bad that catches you off guard. In this day and age movies tend toward being merely mediocre. Money and careful, risk-averse studios appeared to have found away to keep the truly bad movies away from the big screen in favor of making dull, inoffensive, and forgettable into an all new kind of bad movie. And yet, Madame Web has escaped the web of the merely mediocre into the rarified air of being genuinely bad. 

Madame Web stars Dakota Johnson as Cassie Webb, an EMS worker with a murky past. Cassie's mother died in childbirth and she grew up in the foster system. As an adult, Cassie's main source of support is her partner, Ben Parker (Adam Scott). When Cassie is nearly killed while providing life saving measures she begins to have visions of the future. These brief glimpses into the very near future help Cassie see that a mad man dressed in a dark costume is stalking three teenage women, each of whom she's met before, ever so briefly. Julia (Sydney Sweeney), Anya (Isabela Merced), and Mattie (Celeste O'Connor), are from entirely different backgrounds but they share a connection, a lack of a family. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Driveaway Dolls

Driveaway Dolls (2024)

Directed by Ethan Coen

Written by Ethan Coen, Tricia Cooke 

Starring Margaret Qualley, Geraldine Viswanathan, Colman Domingo, Matt Damon, Bill Camp, Pedro Pascal

Release Date February 23rd, 2024 

Published February 23rd, 2024 

Driveaway Dolls is one of the most sex-positive, pro-LGBTQ movies I have ever seen and I love it. Driveaway Dolls is a refreshingly frank and very funny movie that recalls last years Bottoms with a hint of Raising Arizona for good measure. That last part, obviously, comes from the fact that Driveaway Dolls is a rare solo directorial effort from one of the Coen Brothers. Working with screenwriter Tricia Cooke, the comic sensibilities of a classic Coen Brothers take on a modern, LGBTQ friendly sensibility that makes the whole film feel fresh, even as the movie is set in 1999. 

Driveaway Dolls stars Geraldine Viswanathan as Marian and Margaret Qualley as Marian's best friend, Jamie. The two could not be more different. Jamie is uptight and sexually repressed, while Jamie seeks sex as if it were her profession. As we join the story, Jamie is in the midst of cheating on her girlfriend, Sukie (Beanie Feldstein) and thus, getting kicked out of her apartment. As for Marian, she's grown weary of life in New York and plans to escape to Tallahasse and the loving arms of her aunt. 

With nowhere to live and nothing better to do, Jamie decides that she's going to Tallahassee with Marian, despite not being invited. Jamie however, has a way to get them there cheap. The two go to Clancy's Driveaways, owned by the gruff but lovable, Clancy (Bill Camp). Just as the girls are arriving, Clancy has finished a phone call. He is to give two people a specific car to take to Tallahassee and since Marian and Jamie happen to be going to Tallahassee, Clancy assumes they are the ones taking the car. 

Find my full length review at Pride.Media 

Movie Review Ordinary Angels

Ordinary Angels (2024) 

Directed by Jon Gunn 

Written by Meg Tilly, Kelly Fremon Craig

Starring Hilary Swank, Alan Ritchson, Nancy Travis, Amy Acker, Tamala Jones 

Release Date February 23rd, 2024 

Published February 20th, 2024 

Okay, fine, I admit it, I cried... hard. I cried. Watching the movie Ordinary Angels made me weep. I'm in my late 40s and I am far more in touch with my emotions than ever before. So, perhaps, that may explain a little why such a desperately conventional movie touched me so deeply that I had to cry. Ordinary Angels is exactly the kind of movie that is constructed to extract tears from the audience. It's a machine that sucks tears from your face whether you are compelled to give up the tears or not. And yet, my tears came not from the forced nature of the plot about an imperiled, adorable 5 year old girl, but from genuinely overwhelmed by the kindness that people are capable of when properly motivated. 

I'm sure that if I did further research I would find that the term 'Based on a True Story' has been abused to the usual degree but regardless, the film does show the most emotional moment of the story as it happened via some pre-credits, archival news footage, and that's going to have to be enough for me. This is a mostly true story about a family that suffered beyond anything normal. After struggling to get pregnant and struggling to give birth, Theresa Schmitt (Amy Acker), passed away just two years after her second daughter, Michelle was born. Just three years after this, Michelle herself fell ill and needed a liver transplant to survive. 

Drowning in debt and lost in grief, Ed Schmitt struggled to keep his family afloat with the help of his mother, Barbara (Nancy Travis). Then, a strange sort of miracle happened in the form of Sharon Stevens (Hilary Swank). A tornado of a personality, Sharon saw the family's story in a newspaper, how their mother had passed away and how Michelle needed a liver transplant and Sharon threw herself into action. At first, Sharon launched a fundraiser at her hair salon, co-owned with her best friend, played by Tamala Jones. This fundraiser brought in more than $3000 dollars but Sharon sensed that this would not be enough. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Documentary Review Plastic People

Plastic People (2024) 

Directed by Ben Addelman, Ziya Tong

Written by Ben Addelman

Starring Ziya Tong 

Release Date March 9th, 2024

We are no longer Homo-Sapiens, we've evolved, we're now Homo-Plasticus. That's not my observation, that is the observation of scientist and doctor Sedat Gundogdu. Dr. Gundogdu has been tracking microplastics around the globe from his home in Turkey. As hard as it can be to wrap your head around it, the plastics that we encounter everyday are never going away. They have to go somewhere and in scientific test after test, so-called Microplastics are being found in the last place you'd think to look or even be able to look, your own body. 

The documentary Plastic People, debuting at the SXSW Film Festival on March 9th, is halting, breathtaking and frightening warning and call to action. The documentary lays out the case that we desperately need to cut back on our reliance on plastic or risk a continuously worsening health crisis. Microplastics can cause cancer, developmental delays in children, and any other number of ailments and if we keep unknowingly ingesting these tiny pieces of plastic, we have no idea what even greater harm might befall humanity in the future. 

Plastic People unfolds a serious of smaller stories that feeds into a larger story about how and why microplastics have been making their way into the human body. One such sequence follows the co-director of Plastic People, Ziya Tong using her own body to prove the growing issue of microplastics in the human body. Tong undergoes a blood test and a test of her feces and each return results that show particles of microplastic in her body. Researchers have been seeking people to test for microplastics and even when testing people who aren't making a documentary about microplastics, the results were the same. 

Find my full length review at Earth.Media 

Documentary Review Dickweed

Dickweed (2024) 

Directed by Jonathan Ignatius Green 

Written by Jonathan Ignatius Green 

Starring Emily Pokora, Ronald Douglass, Greg Kriek, Rizzy Fuentes 

Release Date March 9th, 2024 at SXSW Film Festival 

Published March 9th, 2024 

Dickweed is a rollercoaster of a true crime story that starts right at the biggest drop and keeps the twists and turns coming at a neck snapping pace. It's a jarring, fascinating and jaw dropping story that keeps you guessing from start to finish. And, it comes with the pleasure of knowing that no one died. Yeah, this is a true crime story in which there are no dead people. A crime is committed, it's a terrifying and life altering crime, but there is no death and that makes it all the more riveting as we are introduced to a villain with the dangerous aura of a killer, minus the actual body count. 

In 2012, a weed dealer named Mike was chilling on his couch, dozing off. His girlfriend is asleep in the bedroom. Suddenly, without any warning, Mike is awakened by a flashlight attached to a shotgun. He's beaten and bound. His girlfriend is bound and gagged. Both Mike and his girlfriend are bundled into a van by three masked men. On the way to being driven into the desert, Mike is interrogated about where the million dollars is. Mike, genuinely doesn't know what they are talking about. The three men are operating on the belief that Mike has a million dollars buried in the desert. Mike does not have any money buried in any desert. 

This fact doesn't stop the masked men from beating Mike relentlessly while threatening harm toward his girlfriend. The two are then dumped in the desert and, seemingly having realized that Mike is telling the truth, they decide to leave them in the desert to fend for themselves. Oh, but there is one more horrifying detail. It's the reason for the title of this movie. An injury is inflicted upon Mike that threatens to end his life. If not for the quick thinking and the effort of his girlfriend, Dickweed would have a body count. Thankfully, she was able to get help in time. Though, what happened with Mike's horrific injury, you will need to see the documentary to find out. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media linked here. 

Movie Review Float

Float (2024) 

Directed by Sherren Lee 

Written by Jesse LaVercombe, Sherren Lee

Starring Andrea Bang, Robbie Amell, Michelle Krusiec 

Release Date February 9th, 2024 

Published March 18th, 2024 

Float stars Andrea Bang as Waverly, a woman living a lie. She's told her parents that she has gone to Vancouver for an important doctoral apprenticeship that will move her along in her career. In reality, Waverly has gone to Oregon to stay with her artist aunt, Rachel (Michelle Krusiec), while she tries to figure out who she is and what she wants. It's while lying to her parents and having a minor existential crisis that Waverly meets Blake, a handsome local man who raises chickens and cares for his teenage sister. Blake is Rachel's neighbor which is how Waverly knows about his gentle way with chickens. 

Blake is also a lifeguard and when he learns that Waverly doesn't even know how to float, let alone swim, he offers to teach her. It's a blatant attempt to get to spend time alone with her and Waverly is definitely on that wavelength. That said, this is a Nicholas Sparks-esque romance so the two lovers cannot have a clear path to happiness. We already know about Waverly's lies but we will come to learn about Blake's flaws and what has kept him in this small town and generally out of long term relationships. It's a lot of sticky emotions about his late parents and his little sister and somehow it all may prevent him from being with Waverly. 

Red my full length review at Geeks.Media linked here.