Classic Movie Review Westworld

Westworld (1973)

Directed by Michael Crichton

Written by Michael Crichton

Starring Yul Brenner, Richard Benjamin, James Brolin

Release Date August 17th, 1973 

Listeners to the Everyone is a Critic Podcast know that I have a strange relationship with Westerns. On more than one occasion I have spoken of not being a fan of the genre only to then end up praising movies like Open Range, Rio Bravo or, one of my all-time favorites, 3:10 to Yuma. This bizarre relationship to the Western has a lengthy and unique history.

When I was a kid, I told my dad that I didn’t like Westerns. Being a fan of the genre himself, he wanted to try to get me into it. I refused and protested and would not brook watching them quietly. His last attempt to get me into the gunfighting, horse riding genre was rather clever. He said, “What if we watch a Western that also has robots and sword fighting?" The movie was Westworld, and it became the first time I willingly accepted liking something remotely part of the Western genre.

Westworld starred Richard Benjamin and James Brolin as a pair of rich guys who take a vacation at a futuristic park called Westworld. Westworld is one of three rich guy playgrounds where a company called Delos has employed robot technology to recreate the experience of the past. There is Westworld, set in the dusty saloons and whorehouses of the old west. Roman World where patrons indulge in the excesses of ancient Rome and finally Medieval World where guests play around with Arthurian legends.

The first half of the film cleverly plays on the fun of playing dress up and having it appear so real. It’s a wonderful sort of amusement park where Benjamin and Brolin can throw down in a gunfight one night, spend the night with prostitutes at a bordello in the next and have an old west style barfight in the next. All these things are wonderfully fun until they're not.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal 

Movie Review Pitch Perfect 3

Pitch Perfect 3 (2017) 

Directed by Trish Sie

Written by Kay Cannon, Mike White

Starring Anna Kendrick, Rebel Wilson, Hailee Steinfeld, Brittany Snow, Anna Camp, Elizabeth Banks

Release Date December 22nd, 2017

Low expectations are sometimes key to enjoying a particular kind of movie. For example, the third movie in a franchise that was only barely capable of supporting one sequel. The trailer for Pitch Perfect 3 turned out to be the perfect introduction to the supposed finale of the Pitch Perfect trilogy. The trailer was so bad that I expected the characters in the movie to walk on screen, fart, and give me the finger before walking off. That would have been only a slight improvement over that trailer.

What a nice surprise then to find that Pitch Perfect 3 is way better than the trailer indicated. Sure, the film is yet another iteration of the comedy of the awkward pause which has come to plague modern comedy since its introduction in the mid-oughts, but those jokes really only hang around the first half of the film. In the second half we get actual funny jokes and a bizarre plot that works even as it has no business working.

We pick up the story of The Bellas, the A Cappella singing group at the center of this franchise, struggling to find their place in the real world. Becca (Anna Kendrick) has her dream job as a music producer turning into a nightmare when she deals with a talentless rapper who dislikes her changes to his terrible song. Fat Amy (Rebel Wilson) is out of work except for her street show performances as Fat Amy Winehouse and the rest of the Bellas are either bored or merely dissatisfied.

When the group mistakes an invitation to a party for an invitation to perform together at a party, they throw on their Bellas gear only to find humiliation and embarrassment waiting for them. Drowning their sorrows, they concoct a plan to get themselves on a USO Tour where they can at least spend time performing together. That the USO Tour also carries the opportunity to perform and tour with rap god D.J. Khaled makes it all the more exciting.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal 

Movie Review Molly's Game

Molly's Game (2017) 

Directed by Aaron Sorkin

Written by Aaron Sorkin

Starring Jessica Chastain, Idris Elba, Michael Cera, Jeremy Strong, Chris O'Dowd, Kevin Costner 

Release Date December 25th, 2017

Can one scene demonstrate why Aaron Sorkin’s directorial debut, Molly’s Game starring Jessica Chastain falls flat? Probably not, but in this article, I am going to demonstrate how one scene can shed light on the Aaron Sorkin style, why Idris Elba is not really an Aaron Sorkin kind of actor and just who is the Aaron Sorkin style of actor; here’s a hint, they were on The West Wing.

Molly’s Game stars Jessica Chastain in the somewhat true to life role of Molly Bloom, a woman the tabloids came to call ‘The Poker Princess.’ Molly was on her way to the Salt Lake City Olympics as a skier when she suffered a devastating crash injury and was sent into retirement. Instead of going to law school and starting her life, Molly decided to move to Los Angeles, where she goes to work for a high roller who runs a high stakes poker game.

Eventually, Molly takes over the game and begins a multi-million dollar run that came to an abrupt end when the Russian mob began invading her game and leading to the FBI raiding the game and arresting Molly. After Molly wrote a book about her time running high stakes poker games for celebrities, politicians, and tycoons, the FBI raided her again and arrested her.

All of this leads up to the scene we are going to discuss in this article. Molly needs a lawyer, and her fifth choice is Charley Jaffy, played by Idris Elba. Charlie doesn’t want to be Molly’s lawyer, but after a tense interview he can’t help but be intrigued enough to, at least, accompany her to her first hearing. Being that the Russian mob is involved, Charley brings along security and sits one of the beefy guards between himself and Molly.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal

Movie Review Martyrs

Martyrs (2008) 

Directed by Pascal Laugier

Written by Pascal Laugier

Starring Morjana Alaoui, Mylen Jampanoi

Release Date September 3rd, 2008 

As part of our Christmas celebration each year on the Everyone is a Critic Movie Podcast, myself, and my co-hosts, Bob Zerull and Josh Adams engage in movie gift exchange. We each buy each other a movie, watch the movie and then talk about it in a special bonus podcast. This year, Bob’s not so Secret Santa gift for me was the bizarre and fascinating 2008 French horror movie, Martyrs.

French Director Pascal Laugier opens the DVD presentation of Martyrs with an apology. Laugier wants you to know that he’s sorry for what he has committed to film and while it’s half-hearted and self-deprecating, I appreciated it nonetheless. I actually don’t feel he has much to apologize for. Strangely, though, I tend to be a scold when it comes to movies that fall under the banner of "torture porn," I found something else in the movie beyond the simplistic and dismissive labeling.

Martyrs stars Mylene Jampanoi as Lucie, a woman we meet as she was escaping unimaginable torture. Taken to a nearby orphanage, Lucie is cared for and raised and eventually makes a friend in Anna (Morjana Alaoui). This all passes by during the credits and a brief prologue scene that shows us that Lucie suffers from delusions that push her to self-harm.

Cut to 15 years later and we have no idea where Lucie and Anna are. We find ourselves in a sunny suburban kitchen. A normal-ish family is having breakfast with the familiar bickering of teenage siblings and the loving scolding of parents all while food is served and enjoyed. A knock at the door interrupts things but not as much as the shotgun blast that follows. It’s Lucie, she’s come to kill this entire family.

Find my full length review in the Horror Community on Vocal. 

Movie Review Jumanji Welcome to the Jungle

Jumanji Welcome to the Jungle (2017) 

Directed by Jake Kasdan

Written by Chris McKenna, Erik Sommers, Scott Rosenberg, Jeff Pinker

Starring Dwayne The Rock Johnson, Karen Gillan, Jack Black, Kevin Hart, Nick Jonas

Release Date December 20th, 2017

I was not a fan of the noisy, roiling cacophony of special effects and sound that was Jumanji. Director Joe Johnson seemed to throw everything but the kitchen sink at the screen while Robin Williams whooped and hollered and obvious metaphors about family and fathers and sons occasionally forced their way through the chaos. Jumanji 1995 isn’t a terrible movie, but it just wasn’t my taste.

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle, however, is right in my sweet spot. The newest iteration of Jumanji from director Jake Kasdan and five screenwriters, may not be the best example of classic cinema, but it is a surefire spectacle. A great cast, solid special effects and solid direction of a chaotic story all come together to create a year-end blockbuster good for just about any audience.

Dwayne 'The Rock’ Johnson stars in Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle as Dr. Smolder Bravestone, the videogame avatar of a nerd named Spencer (Alex Wolff). Spencer happened to be in detention when a fellow student and former friend from grade school, Fridge (Ser’Darius Blaine), found an old video game and the two decide to play it. Joining them is popular girl Bethany (Madison Iseman) and outsider Martha (Morgan Turner).

A prologue has shown us that the Jumanji game is capable of evolution. After being given as a gift to Alex (Joe Jonas), sometime in the late nineties, the game somehow turned itself into a video game from a board game and sucked Alex into the game. Now, Spencer and his detention friends are also sucked into the game and, as a group, they must use their avatars to navigate the game and stay alive in Jumanji.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal 

Movie Review Father Figures

Father Figures (2017) 

Directed by Lawrence Sher

Written by Justin Malen 

Starring Owen Wilson, Ed Helms, J.K Simmons, Katt Williams, Terry Bradshaw, Ving Rhames, Glenn Close, Christopher Walken

Release Date December 22nd, 2017

Was there a gun to someone’s head forcing them to make the movie Father Figures? I am struggling to understand how this movie exists. Father Figures stars Ed Helms and Owen Wilson as twins, we’ll get to that, who go on a road trip to visit men who may or may not be their biological father. The film seems to have been slapped together without much thought or care or with any semblance of humor.

Father Figures stars Owen Wilson as Kyle and Ed Helms as Peter. Kyle is a surfer bum who did some modeling as a younger man and lucked into a long-term gig as a beer spokesman. Life has always come quite easily to Kyle but not so much to his brother, Peter. Though he was always a good student, he was also geeky and shy and instead of pursuing the life he wanted he settled for becoming a proctologist. To give you an idea of the humor of Father Figures, apparently just saying the word proctologist counts as a joke.

So, Peter is jealous of Kyle, Kyle’s life isn’t the paradise he makes it out to be, lather, rinse, repeat. You’ve seen these characters in a dozen other similar comedies. The brothers don’t get along so their mother, Helen (Glen Close), concocts a scheme to bring them closer together. On the day she is getting married she tells her sons that she doesn’t know who their biological father is.

This angers both men causing them to rent a car and investigate mom’s sexual history to figure out who their biological father might be. Naturally, this is a very sensitive subject that can be very emotional and lead to many questions about personal identity and the makers of Father Figures just want to use it is as a poor excuse for a raunchy road comedy.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal. 

Movie Review The Greatest Showman

The Greatest Showman (2017) 

Directed by Michael Gracey

Written by Bill Condon, Jenny Bicks

Starring Hugh Jackman, Zendaya, Zac Efron, Michelle Williams, Rebecca Ferguson

Release Date December 20th, 2017

The Greatest Showman is a musical with some inventive visuals and mostly brainless story. Were it not purporting to conflate P.T Barnum of all people to sainthood, I could probably watch it and dispose of it in due course. However, because this is P.T Barnum, one of the world’s foremost charlatans and con men, well, let’s just say that the idea of venerating him, sticks in my craw. Already this year, Hollywood has pretended that Winston Churchill was an inspiring, cuddly granddad and frankly, P.T Barnum is, for me, a bridge too far when it comes to revisionism.

Fans of the comedy/history podcast The Dollop know the real P.T Barnum. In a live recorded episode in Barnum’s adopted home of New York City, hosts Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds laid bare the legend of P.T Barnum in all of his phony, humbuggery, glory. As Dave wove the tale of P.T Barnum, from his time taking advantage of an aged, black woman whom he purchased from a fellow con man, to the time he fooled people into believing he’d procured a mermaid which turned out to be a horrifying combination of a monkey sewn to the body of a large fish, P.T Barnum is revealed in The Dollop to be a villain over and over again, no matter how willing and even entertained his victims may have been.

So, yes, I went to The Greatest Showman with a chip on my shoulder and one that remained there throughout the faltering run of witless pop anthems passing off mediocre messages of empowerment centered on a man who would have sooner been caught dead than be seen as anything other than above the people who bought tickets for his own show and especially above those who were performing for the price of that ticket.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal.