Movie Review Death Proof

Death Proof (2007) 

Directed by Quentin Tarentino 

Written by Quentin Tarentino 

Starring Kurt Russell, Rosario Dawson, Vanessa Ferlito, Rose McGowan, Zoe Bell, Mary Elizabeth Winstead

Release Date April 6th, 2007 

Published April 5th, 2007 

Quentin Tarentino is the preeminent film artist of the modern era. A savant like talent who learned filmmaking by watching movies, Tarentino has turned applied knowledge into great art and even now in his tortured partnership with Robert Rodriguez on the twin bill Grindhouse, Tarentino takes his applied knowledge of low filmmaking and turns it into yet another masters class in filmmaking.

Death Proof is an homage to a certain kind of 1970's drive-in slasher movie that is actually still being made today on the fringes of the straight to video biz. The film stars Kurt Russell as Stuntman Mike a Hollywood stuntman well past his prime.

With the advent of CGI guys like Stuntman Mike are a dying breed and you can hear the resentment in his voice as he recounts his history in the business, back in the day, when he was a double for Lee Majors! He still works from time to time but he knows that his days are numbered. It is this resentment that may explain, in some odd way, why Mike takes his anger out on unsuspecting women. Luring them into his tricked out stunt car which he claims is death proof, Stuntman Mike intentionally crashes the car and kills his passenger. The car is only death proof if your in the drivers seat.

Setting his sights on a verbose group of women in a bar, a radio DJ and her three friends, Stuntman Mike first seems like just another creepy patron hitting on younger girls. When they end up rejecting his advances he takes it out on them in a horrifying car chase. Then the scene shifts to a diner in Tennessee where four different women; working on a film crew, are sitting around discussing movies and men. Abbie (Rosario Dawson) is the makeup girl, Lee (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) and Kim (Tracie Toms) and Zoe (Zoe Bell) are stunt women.

Zoe is visiting and has heard that a local man is selling a 1970 Dodge Challenger, just like the one Barry Newman drove in the movie Vanishing Point, in pristine condition, right down to the color and the four barrel engine. Zoe wants a test drive and something more. Little do the girls know that Stuntman Mike is nearby and wants a piece of the action.

That scene leads to one of the greatest car chases you have ever seen in a movie. Tarentino's filmmaking skills create a visceral, emotional, physical experience. These chases are as good or better than even his dialogue which is, as usual, dense and filled to overflow with pop culture bacchanalia.

The characters in the first half of Death Proof, aside from Stuntman Mike, are a verbose and intelligent lot who have interesting, involving conversations that sound mighty familiar. Peppered with references to the Acuna Boys (Kill Bill), foot massages (Pulp Fiction) and Red Apple Cigarettes (every Tarentino film), these conversations are so inside baseball they could make Kevin Smith Blush.

I'm not saying that Death Proof is for Tarentino fans only, it just deepens the experience if you get the references. This is a terrifically smart and entertaining and exciting movie regardless of whether you are a Tarentino fan. Besides, the chases scenes are essentially wordless and are the most entertaining and invigorating part of the film.

Everything about Death Proof works. This is among the best work of Tarentino's career and one of the best movies you will see in 2007.

Movie Review Run Ronnie Run

Run Ronnie Run (2003) 

Directed by Troy Miller 

Written by David Cross, Bob Odenkirk, Scott Aukerman, B.J Porter, Brian Posehn 

Starring David Cross, Bob Odenkirk, David Koechner, Jill Talley, Ben Stiller, Jack Black 

Release Date September 16th, 2003 

Published December 15th, 2003

Being a huge fan of the HBO series “Mr. Show with Bob & David,” I have been hearing for a very long while about the film based on one of the show’s best sketches, Run Ronnie Run. The story of the most arrested man in America, one Ronnie Dobbs, Run Ronnie Run went into production in November of 2000 and premiered at the Sundance film festival in 2001. So how come you have never seen it in theaters or on video? Because New Line Cinema decided not to release the film. The cynical bastards behind Dumb and Dumberer decided not to release Run Ronnie Run???

Maybe that is for the best, because though the film has some truly inspired hysterical moments, the compromised version that has seeped out through various sources is not quite what it's creators had hoped. Based on characters created in the first season of Mr. Show, Run Ronnie Run is the story of Ronnie Dobbs (David Cross), a Georgia redneck who enjoys getting drunk and raising hell. He occasionally lives in a trailer with his three illegitimate kids, all named Ronnie Jr., and his common law wife Tammy (Mr. Show regular Jill Talley).

Ronnie gains notoriety after his numerous drunken arrests on the faux Cops show Fuzz catch the attention of a British TV producer named Terry Twillstein (Bob Odenkirk). Terry immediately heads to Georgia and, after bailing Ronnie out of jail, brings Ronnie to Hollywood. Together they pitch a TV show in which Ronnie will travel the country getting arrested while being followed by a camera crew.

The show is an immediate smash, but fame gets the better of Ronnie. Before long he is holding big celebrity parties and sleeping with the model from his favorite beer commercial, rather than drinking beer with his old friends or watching a mangy dog eat vomit. As his friends say, “Ronnie, you've changed man.” Soon Ronnie has quit drinking and can't even get arrested.

It's a smart, funny satire of the classic rags to riches, fame corrupts story told in a surprisingly straight linear story. Whereas on Mr. Show both Bob and David play multiple characters in one episode, in the movie they generally remain as one character, save for a couple of dream sequences. The film does hint at other Mr. Show sketches, including a dream sequence music video of Bob and David's pop band send up 3 times 1 minus 1. There’s also a brilliant revision of their Ronnie Dobbs sketch "Fuzz: The Musical" with Mandy Patinkin as Ronnie.

There are a number of brilliant moments in Run Ronnie Run like Ronnie's uncovering of the worldwide gay conspiracy with an excellent cameo by Kids in the Hall star Scott Thompson and Seinfeld's Patrick Warburton. Also there’s an odd but brilliant outtake with Jack Black as the Dick Van Dyke character in Mary Poppins singing a song that has to be heard to be believed. F-CKING BRILLIANT!

That said, the cut I saw seems somewhat compromised and lacks the snap of the sketch version. Ronnie is a little more sweet and sympathetic, as is the character of Tammy. What made Ronnie brilliant on the show was his complete self delusion that encapsulated every Neanderthal, shirtless redneck in the history of the show, Cops. The guys on Cops are not sympathetic characters. They are often drunken, homophobic wife beaters, which Ronnie was in the sketch. But those traits are either excised or underplayed in the film version and that tames much of the satire.

Nevertheless, the worst of Run Ronnie Run is far funnier than anything in New Line's Dumb and Dumberer, and that thing was dumped into the theaters on 2000+ screens. They could at least put Ronnie out on DVD (Ed. Note – Run Ronnie Run will be released on DVD in September 2003). It may not be everything it's genius creators had in mind but it's as good or better than most modern comedies.

Movie Review The Yellow Handkerchief

The Yellow Handkerchief (2010) 

Directed by Udayan Prasad 

Written by Erin Dignam 

Starring William Hurt, Maria Bello, Kristen Stewart, Eddie Redmayne 

Release Date February 26th, 2010 

Published August 4th, 2010 

“The Yellow Handkerchief” is a great looking movie that relies on fabulous Louisiana scenery and a strong eye for locations to distract from what is a rather dull and inert bit of storytelling. Indian director Udayan Presad and writer Erin Dignam, like so many indie minded teams, mistake characters saying and doing inappropriate things for character development.

William Hurt stars in “The Yellow Handkerchief” as Brett a fresh from prison, oil rig working lummox who finds himself on a journey through Louisiana with a pair of emotionally damaged teenagers. Eddie Redmayne is the slightly mentally handicapped Gordie and “Twilight's” Kristen Stewart is the daddy issues having Martine.

For Gordie, Brett is an obstacle and oracle. Because Martine has an obvious affinity for Brett, he stands between Gordie and his crush on Martine even as Brett attempts to offer Gordie sage council on how to deal with her. For Martine, there is a mixture of wanting a father figure and the forbidden nature of being attracted to a stange, older man.

Throughout “The Yellow Handkerchief” we flash back to Brett's life before he was released from prison. Brett was once happily married until something happened and he ended up spending the next 6 years in jail. Maria Bello plays either his wife or his victim, you'll have to see the film yourself to find out.

The characters in “The Yellow Handkerchief” work very hard to make each other and us uncomfortable. They say oddly personal things and reveal things about themselves that normal humans might not reveal to close friends. Call it the comfort of strangers if you like but if a stranger spoke to me the way these characters speak to each other, I would run away screaming.

There is a worthy bit of filmmaking skill to “The Yellow Handkerchief.” Gorgeous scenery, a well managed pace that sinks perfectly into the film's hot southern exteriors; with a better sense of character, something more believable and far less off-putting, “The Yellow Handkerchief” could be extraordinary.

Sadly, the only thing likely to come from “The Yellow Handkerchief” is a solid audition reel for director Udayan Presad and cinematographer Chris Menges.

Movie Review The Chosen One

The Chosen One (2008) 

Directed by Chris Lackey 

Written by Chad Fifer, Chris Lackey 

Starring Laura Prepon, Chris Fifer, Chris Sarandon, Tim Curry, Danielle Fishel Lance Hendrickson

Release Date Unknown 

Published December 8th, 2008 

A WOC listener friend of mine gave me a DVD a while back. It's an animated movie directed by his son. I promised I would give it look. Now several months later I have finally watched the slacker meets religion flick The Chosen One and I wish I hadn't waited so long.

This irreverent little animated flick doesn't reinvent the wheel but it's a solid 80 minute distraction with humor along the irreverent line of the good folks at Adult Swim on the Cartoon Network. Snarky, talky, low budget satire with just a hint of blasphemy.

Our hero is Lou (Voice of Chris Fifer) a loser who just got dumped by his gal pal Rachel (Voice of Laura Prepon) and was fired from his job, cleaning test tubes for some science factory where his best pal Donna (Danielle Fishel) had moved earth to get him a gig that he promptly fumbled.

After losing his girl and his job Lou's luck goes from bad to worse when a Chinese satellite falls on his car and he's attacked by a bear. All of this bad luck leads Lou to join his buddy Zeb (Chris Sarandon), a senior citizen who share's Lou's apartment, at some scam religious gathering.

There Lou finds out that he is The Chosen One and he must travel to Kansas to stand on a mountain, more of a hill really, and hear the voice of god. So, with the help of Zeb and Donna, who's the only person he knows with a car, Lou sets out for Kansas

Trailing him are a team of super religious assassins and helping out is Satan voiced with liquid loquaciousness by Tim Curry. The Chosen One has wild, irreverent sense of humor that combines outlandishness, geek culture and blasphemy for a terrifically good time.

The animation is amateur at best but the low budget aesthete is not really all that important. The Chosen One flies on its rolling sense of humor. The college crowd will eat up the robot ninjas, the hot sci fi chick ex-girlfriend, and especially Tim Curry's devilish Devil.

General audiences will have to get past the religious stuff and if you can stand the impiety you will laugh frequently at the genial, good natured slacker humor of The Chosen One.

Now, where can you find this hidden gem? Try www.TheChosenOneMovie.com

Movie Review Hot Fuzz

Hot Fuzz (2007) 

Directed by Edgar Wright 

Written by Edgar Wright, Simon Pegg

Starring Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, Timothy Dalton, Cate Blanchett, Jim Broadbent 

Release Date April 20th, 2007 

Published April 19th, 2007 

The buzz has been building for months around the action comedy Hot Fuzz. It comes from the creators of the cult hit Shaun Of the Dead, a film that was both a send up of classic zombie flicks and a reinvention. Now the Shaun team takes aim at the classically American action movie. With nods toward Point Break, Bad Boys 2 and even a glance at Chinatown, Hot Fuzz fires bullets in many different directions, blows up any number of locales and is often quite funny while doing it.

If it were just about 30 minutes shorter, Hot Fuzz would be a very cool movie.

Nicolas Angel (Simon Pegg) is the best cop in London. His arrest rate is 400 percent higher than every other cop in the city and he is making the other cops look bad. In order to lower the bar for the rest of London's finest, Nicolas is given a transfer. Sent to the tiny village of Sandford, the big city cop finds himself in the place known as the safest village in all of England.

Left busting underage drinkers and tracking down a swan on the loose on mainstreet, Nicolas is bored to tears. Lucky for him, the exciting stuff is just about to begin. As the town prepares for the annual village of the year contest a strange series of accidents kills off some of the more troublesome residents of Sandford and Nicolas begins to wonder if all of these accidents could really be just a coincidence.

That is the set up to a story that takes absolutely forever to really get going. Written and directed by Edgar Wright, with his team from Shaun Of The Dead, Hot Fuzz tries to have it both ways and be taken seriously in an action thriller vein and be funny in sending up American action cliches. The tone of the film is fuzzy, even employing some horror film style violence among the mystery and action elements, and this causes the film to drag through the first 90 minutes or so.

Simon Pegg never really looks like an action hero but throughout Hot Fuzz, in what I'm sure was meant as parody, Pegg becomes so taciturn and earnestly tough that he becomes nearly convincing. Pegg gets really into the role of a badass, by the book cop and his performance is yet another confused piece of satire in Hot Fuzz. Don't be mistaken, Pegg is often quite funny but the character is at times too convincing which undercuts the humor in many scenes.

The last half hour of Hot Fuzz nearly rescues the picture. Taking cues from Bad Boys 2, Point Break and Rambo, Hot Fuzz starts blowing up anything and everything, firing copious amounts of bullets and celebrating the goofball quipfests that are the hallmark of the 80's and 90's style American action movie. When the trailer says "from the guys who saw every action movie, ever made" they aren't kidding.

Though multiple homages to Point Break seem a little curious and out of date, fans of that Keanu Reeves-Patrick Swayze campfest will be rolling on the floor laughing. That film, for all its cheese-tastic goodness, did feature one of the best foot chases in any movie I've ever seen and Hot Fuzz provides a loving and hysterical send up of that scene.

Another great popcorn aspect of Hot Fuzz is the filmmaker's Where's Waldo approach to celebrity cameos. A pair of big name international stars, an Academy Award nominated actress and an Academy Award winning Director, are hidden in plain sight in Hot Fuzz. You may have to see the film more than once to catch both cameos.

As a movie geek myself I was looking forward to Hot Fuzz. I loved Shaun of the Dead and that film definitely showed Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright's brilliant talent for sending up conventions of genre. They are just slightly off the beat in Hot Fuzz. Taking themselves just a tad too seriously, the team behind Hot Fuzz manages to make a real action movie early on and then flex their parody skills at the very end. These are some big laughs but the more than 90 minutes it takes to get there are deathly dull at times.

Movie Review Lord of the Rings The Two Towers

Lord of the Rings The Two Towers 

Directed by Peter Jackson 

Written by Fran Walsh, Phillipa Boyens, Peter Jackson

Starring Elijah Wood, Orlando Bloom, Viggo Mortensen, Liv Tyler, Ian McKellan, Sean Bean, Cate Blanchett

Release Date December 18th, 2002 

Published December 17th, 2002 

With all the hype about the second film in the Lord of the Rings trilogy, is it possible for this film not to be a little disappointing? The first film, The Fellowship of the Ring, overcame the hype to be an impressive artistic achievement. However, the impressive debut only increases the pressure on the follow-up films. So the success of Fellowship raises the bar to nearly unreachable heights for The Two Towers. That this second film nearly meets the hype is an achievement in and of itself.

We rejoin the J.R.R. Tolkien tale (as adapted by Peter Jackson and writer Frances Walsh) to find our heroic Hobbits Frodo (Elijah Wood) and Sam (Sean Astin) lost in the hills on the way to Mordor. Hot on their huge Hobbit heels is Gollum, the former owner of the ring Frodo is charged with destroying in the fires of Mount Doom. As Frodo and Sam lay sleeping, Gollum attacks and is quickly subdued. 

Needing a guide to Mordor, the Hobbits draft Gollum and continue their quest. Meanwhile, the remaining members of the Fellowship, Aragorn (Viggo Mortensen), Legolas (Orlando Bloom) and Gimli (Jonathan Rhys Davies), are searching for their friends Merry and Pippin who have been kidnapped by the Uruk Hai. Under the control of the evil Lord Saruman, the Uruk Hai are pillaging the countryside of the Kingdom of Rohan.

Rohan's King Theoden has, unbeknownst to the members of his family, been corrupted by Saruman leaving no one to stop the Uruk Hai. An army led by Theoden's nephew finally does rise up and stop the Uruk Hai, slaughtering a lot of them and momentarily leaving the fate of Merry and Pippin up in the air.

As it turns out, Merry and Pippin are fine, having escaped into the forest and into the arms of a walking, talking tree named Treebeard, who leads them to an amazing discovery. As Aragorn and company continue their search, they discover what Merry and Pippin had just previously discovered, that Wizard Gandalf the Gray, who was thought to be dead, is alive and after defeating the Balrog, and is now Gandalf the White. This evidently means he is more powerful than before.

Using his new power, Gandalf is able to free king Theoden from the control of Saruman. Even after being freed from Saruman, Theoden is unwilling to go to war and instead flees his kingdom for the seeming safety of the cavern castle in Helms Deep. All of this is leading to the film's centerpiece, the grandiose Battle of Helm's Deep, where Saruman's massive ten-thousand-man army of Uruk Hai fights against the several hundred residents of Rohan who aren't women or children. The kingdom's army, having left earlier in the film, are being retrieved by Gandalf, but will not make it until well into the battle.

The battle of Helms Deep is indeed a spectacle, visually awesome and seamlessly integrated. Peter Jackson's special effects are an amazing achievement; he actually manages to make all of this look plausibly real. Of course, the film's greatest technical achievement is the character of Gollum. Inhabited in part by actor Andy Serkis (but mostly CGI), Gollum is a lively and imaginative creation. Gollum manages to make an impression without being overbearing or obnoxious like his CGI brother Jar Jar Binks. Gollum is a technical masterpiece, very likely to earn the special effects team an Oscar.

As visually exciting as The Two Towers is, it lacks in many ways. The middle of the film drags to the point of being dull and when the action slows down, the clunky dialogue and earnest close-ups slam the film to a halt. The character development is lost in the waves of action and effects scenes. We know who to cheer for and why but the audience's emotional investment in the characters is limited.

Wood continues to be an unappealing actor. His Frodo is all empty gaze and pained expression. Wood is an actor with talent but limited charisma and paired with the equally dull Sean Astin, the film's most important subplot is saved only by Gollum. Viggo Mortensen, on the other hand, is very charismatic and commanding, and Ian McKellan's Gandalf, in limited screen time, delivers the most memorable moments of the film.

The action and effects of The Two Towers are overwhelming, rolling over the audience in waves. Unfortunately when the action slows down, the film drags and the lack of character development becomes more obvious.

Movie Review: Elizabeth The Golden Age Starring Cate Blanchett

Elizabeth The Golden Age (2007) 

Directed by Shekhar Kapur 

Written by William Nicholson. Michael Hirst 

Starring Cate Blanchett, Clive Owen, Geoffrey Rush, Rhys Ifans, Abbie Cornish, Samantha Morton 

Release Date October 12th, 2007

Published October 11th, 2007 

It's been less than a decade since Cate Blanchett burst upon the scene in Elizabeth. Up till then; a working actress in England, 1998 saw Cate Blanchett get the role of a lifetime playing the virgin queen Elizabeth, one of the most revered figures in English history. Now Ms. Blanchett returns to the role that earned her an Oscar nomination. Elizabeth: The Golden Age falls well short of the dramatic heights scaled by the original. However, Ms. Blanchett is as regal and beautiful as ever and finds just the right grace and style to keep The Golden Age from tipping over into utter melodramatic disaster.

Picking up less than a decade from where Elizabeth left off, Elizabeth The Golden Age finds Queen Elizabeth presiding over a divided country. Christians and protestants are at odds all over Europe and in Spain King Philip (Jordi Molla) is leading the christian cause with his Spanish Inquisition. In England, the struggle of Christians is epitomized by Queen Elizabeth's rival, Mary Queen of Scots (Samantha Morton), who English Christians have claimed as their true queen.

While trying to avoid a holy war of a religious division as well as actual war with Spain, Queen Elizabeth is looking into the idea of marriage as a diplomatic tool. She finds few of any of England's allies to be a suitable match. However, there is an Englishman who has caught her eye. His name is Sir Walter Raleigh (Clive Owen).

Freshly returned from America, where he established the colony of Virginia in honor of England's virgin queen, Raleigh begins a flirtatious dance with the queen as well as with the queen's closet friend Annette (Susan Lynch). With war against Spain imminent and Mary Queen of Scots scheming in secret with potential assassins, the last thing the queen needs is romantic drama. Can Elizabeth balance her personal life with the duties of royalty and protecting England? Historians are likely snickering at such a question.

Elizabeth: The Golden Age plays fast and loose with history in order to craft a daytime soap opera of epic proportion. The grand guignol drama of Elizabeth is often worthy of the catty likes of Dynasty or Melrose Place. Just watch the hissy fit that Blanchett's Elizabeth is forced to play upon learning of Raleigh and Annette's affair. Heather Locklear on her best day could not have done better. That Ms. Blanchett is only momentarily set back by such lame histrionics is a true testament to her talent.

Director Shekar Kapur's true talent is opulent settings and grand costuming. Elizabeth: The Golden Age will no doubt compete for Oscars in set design and costume for the lavish colorful creations of Kapur and production designer Guy Dyas and costumer Alexandra Byrne. The lush beauty of Elizabeth The Golden Age and Cate Blanchett's ability to act and perform the work of a wonderful clothes horse, nearly make Elizabeth The Golden Age worthy of a recommendation. Nearly. 

Playing from a soap opera level narrative; Cate Blanchett pulls off an exceptional performance. Her Elizabeth is quick witted, cunning and brave with vulnerability that is very disarming. She is as strong in ostentatious costume as she is in battle armor preparing to lead her soldiers into battle. It's stunning how powerful Blanchett is in overcoming what is a truly underwhelming script.

Clive Owen and Geoffrey Rush also fight their way through the histrionics of Elizabeth: The Golden Age to varying success. Owen does spark with Blanchett in their few romantic scenes. In fact they spark so well that it's impossible to believe that Owen's Sir Walter would go for Susan Lynch's winsome girl Annette over Blanchett's blazing, womanly Elizabeth. As things play out, the only reason we see Owen with Lynch is because history recalls Elizabeth as the virgin queen.

As for Geoffrey Rush, the script truly lets him down. As Elizabeth's long time consigliere he is forced by this narrative to be blind and foolish until he is not. There is a subplot with his brother that is supposed to explain his foolish behavior but it's botched so badly that Rush's character is left adrift. Rush is far too good an actor to play a character made to look this silly. 

There is the potential for yet another Elizabeth movie if rumors are true. The virgin queen did live for many years past the end of The Golden Age. Fans of Shakespeare In Love will recall that an elder Elizabeth, played in Oscar winning glory by Dame Judi Dench, presided over the era of Shakespeare's England. I'm not at all opposed to seeing Cate Blanchett reprise this role as even in this supremely flawed film she is an electric performer.

Here's hoping another Elizabeth can be more than merely an opulent example of how beautiful Cate Blanchett is in very expensive costumes.

Movie Review: The Shipping News

The Shipping News (2001)

Directed by Lasse Hallstrom

Written by Robert Nelson Jacobs

Starring Kevin Spacey, Julianne Moore, Judi Dench, Scott Glenn, Cate Blanchett 

Release Date December 18th, 2001

Published December 17th, 2001 

E. Annie Proulx's bestseller The Shipping News preceded Oprah's book club by a few years but if the film is anything like the book then it would fit Oprah's book club perfectly. The Shipping News is that kind of non-controversial life affirming claptrap that Oprah extols on a weekly basis. The film, adapted for the screen Robert Nelson Jacobs and directed by Lasse Hallstrom, the master of life affirming claptrap, stars Kevin Spacey as Quoyle.

While living a miserable invisible existence, Quoyle is finally noticed by Pedal Bear (yes I said Pedal Bear), played by the lovely Cate Blanchett. Pedal however is not as soft as her name would suggest. She uses Quoyle for room and board while cheating on him. Pedal does manage to have a child with Quoyle, but isn't much of a mother to Bunny, played by the Gainer Triplets Lauren, Kaitlyn and Alissa.

Quoyle is a good father but far too dull for Pedal who continues to run around on him until she is killed in a car wreck. Quoyle and his daughter pick up their lives and leave to live with Quoyle's Aunt Agnis (Dame Judi Dench) in Newfoundland. There, Quoyle gets a job at a local newspaper where he writes the shipping news, a very big deal in the small fishing community.

Scott Glenn is Jack Buggit, the paper's eccentric owner who hires Quoyle despite the fact that Quoyle has no writing experience and while he will be writing about boats, Quoyle hates water. This is supposed to be cute and quirky but it plays as baffling and bizarre. Soon after landing a job he's not qualified for, Quoyle meets the obligatory movie love interest. Her name is Wavy Prowse (yes I said Wavy) (Julianne Moore). Why? I have no idea why. 

Maybe I'm too cynical for this film, or any film with characters named Wavy, Pedal and Bunny. Oh and don't forget Tert (Pete Postlethwaite) the newspapers manager and Beaufeld Nutbeem (Rhys Ifans) the paper’s international writer. Of course Ifans is one of the few actors who could pull off a character named Beaufeld Nutbeem. 

The Shipping News is a typically Lasse Hallstrom movie. It's prosaic and slow though lovely to look at. He's terrific at soft surfaces but even more adept at softheaded narratives with all of the memorable qualities of a barely remembered dream. All of Lasse Hallstrom's films seem to strive for deep meaning but they almost always end up with little more than surface emotion and not much else. I apologize if you are someone who enjoys Lasse Hallstrom's gauzy, bleary, boring movies but I cannot begin to understand why anyone would enjoy them.

I had hoped this film would be a return to form for Spacey after consecutive dull performances in Pay It Forward and K-Pax. Sadly though, Spacey in The Shipping News continues in his dewy-eyed schlep role, no passion, no vigor, nothing of Lester Burnham or Verbal Kint or John Doe. Even Spacey's screen chewing presence in The Big Kahuna is preferable to his recent string of dull losers.

The Shipping News sinks.

Sorry I couldn't help myself.

Movie Review: The Lord of the Rings The Fellowship of The Ring

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001) 

Directed by Peter Jackson

Written by Peter Jackson, Phillipa Boyens, Fran Walsh 

Starring Elijah Wood, Ian Holm, Ian McKellan, Christopher Lee, Viggo Mortensen, Liv Tyler 

Release Date December 10th, 2001 

Published December 9th, 2001

For the first time in a long while I was able to walk into a theater with almost no knowledge of the film I was about to see. The trailers were merely teasers that didn't giveaway anything of the story, I've never read the book on which the film is based and I read no reviews of the film before seeing it. Yet the film I saw is one of the more hyped films of all time, The Lord Of the Rings Fellowship of The Ring. You're wondering how I was able to avoid learning about LOTR and what it was about. I assure you it wasn't a calculated effort. The books never appealed to me, I did know a little something about hobbits, Middle earth and fairies, but beyond that the film was entirely new to me.

Fellowship is the first in a three picture series in the Lord of the Rings trilogy. It introduces the story of Frodo Baggins (Elijah Wood), who inherits a powerful and mysterious ring from his uncle, Bilbo Baggins (Ian Holm). Frodo has no idea what the ring does but is quickly clued in by the friendly wizard Gandalf (Ian Mckellen), who explains the ring's origin and that of its owner and controller, the evil Lord Sauron. The Ring, we are told, has the power to enslave all of Middle earth; thus it must be destroyed. A fellowship of 9 made up of elves, men, dwarves and hobbits must destroy the ring by returning it to the fires of Mount Doom. Oh if it were only that easy. Sauron is also searching for the ring with his allies the Orcs, and the powerful wizard Samuron (Christopher Lee) who is building an army to stop the intruders.

If you think I'm simplifying too much I'm sorry, I'm just trying to get to my point. It's been a while since we've seen such a pure good vs. evil story, I in fact thought that irony may have destroyed Hollywood's ability to tell such a story without having characters that are overly flawed and quirky. In any other action movie, Frodo would have a drinking problem or an ex-wife who complains about child support and he would make wisecracks before dispatching a villain while each of his emotions were underscored by some pop classic. Yes in that sense LOTR is a breath of fresh air.

Elijah Wood will never be confused with your average adventure hero. His Frodo Baggins is tiny and frightened and certainly not predisposed to violence. Instead, he's pretty good at running and hiding, which he does a lot of. Don't be mistaken, Wood doesn't play Frodo as a coward, he's realistic. He knows he's not a fighter and leaves the warrior stuff to the warriors. Viggo Mortensen is the true standout in the very large cast that also includes Liv Tyler, Cate Blanchett and Hugo Weaving. Mortensen shows some charisma and energy in Fellowship that I had not seen from him before. Here he tears into his character and allows his emotions to carry his words and he's very effective. Lord of the Rings is an epic adventure of great scale and scope. Give director Peter Jackson a lot of credit, he has created an entirely new world onscreen. He brings it to life with amazing visual flourish yet doesn't allow the film to get buried underneath it's special effects, which is quite a delicate balancing act.

Comparisons to Star Wars are warranted. The character's motivations and the action-before-dialogue style are quite reminiscent of the George Lucas creation. Character development takes a backseat to visual artistry and the latest in SFX and CGI technology. Although I prefer more character driven styles, action adventures if done well can be almost as entertaining and Lord of the Rings is very well done. 

Sidenote: Am I the only one who thought Christopher Lee looked like Osama Bin Laden? It was probably just the beard, but his first close-up was somewhat jarring.

Movie Review The Four Feathers

The Four Feathers (2002) 

Directed by Shakur Kapur 

Written by Michael Schiffer, Hossein Amini 

Starring Heath Ledger, Wes Bentley, Kate Hudson, Djimon Hounsou, Michael Sheen, 

Release Date September 20th, 2002 

Published September 19th, 2002 

Director Shakar Kapur splashed on the scene with 1998's spectacular Elizabeth. While Cate Blanchett made the movie brilliant, Kapur's production design made it beautiful. In Kapur's new film, The Four Feathers, Kapur's lush visual style is in place. Unfortunately, he doesn't have Cate Blanchett to save the film’s weak dialogue and characters.

Heath Ledger stars as Harry Favisham, an up and coming British soldier under the command of his father and soon to marry Ethne, played by Kate Hudson. American Beauty's Wes Bentley plays Harry's best friend Jack Durrance. Also a soldier, Jack is nursing a jealous crush on Ethne. When Harry and Jack's regiment is told they will be shipping out to war in the Sudan, Jack is excited to finally have the opportunity to fight for his country, Harry isn't so sure. 

Deciding that his fear of death outweighs his love of country, Harry resigns his commission and leaves the Army. After learning of Harry's actions his friends, except for Jack, send him 3 feathers. The feathers are a symbol of cowardice. The fourth feather, as mentioned by the film’s title, comes not from Jack, but from Ethne who decides social status is more important than love.

Disgraced and alone, Harry follows the troops movements through community bulletin boards where the army places lists of soldiers who have died. After hearing that his former regiment had taken heavy casualties, Harry heads for Sudan to help them. Once in Sudan Harry nearly dies trying to find the British troops. He is saved by an African slave named Abou Fatma (Djimon Hounsou). We’re not certain why Abou saves Harry, nor do we know why he stays with him to keep him safe, Harry does nothing to earn Abou's loyalty.

There are other plot strands in The Four Feathers but nothing very memorable. It's mostly filler, something to do while Kapur and cinematographer Robert Richardson make a lovely Sudanese travel video. If it weren't for endless civil wars and lack of clean water, Sudan might be a beautiful place to visit. At least as it looks, according to Kapur and Richardson. Actually the film was shot in Morocco, so who knows what Sudan actually looks like. The cinematography, no matter where it took place, is at times breathtaking.

The performances and story of The Four Feathers are the film’s weakest points. Ledger, desperately trying to break out of the teen hunk mold, never paints a realistic portrait of a British soldier. He is at times too goofy or too emotional. His traits are too Americanized to be British. Both Hudson and Bentley, who are actually Americans, have the same problems Ledger does though to their credit their accents weren't bad.

The film’s biggest problem is the narrative, which asks the audience to root for a character, Harry, who is a coward. Harry has no conviction and no politics; he is simply a coward too afraid to lay down his life for his country. Some Hero! Had Harry had some real intellectual reason as to why he would not go to war he would be easy to identify with, as there were numerous good reasons to not go to war. For one, why Sudan? It's not like it served any strategic purpose, it's just a desert. Why fight a war in which the sole purpose is killing enough people to be able to claim useless desert land? These however are my reasons for not going to war, not Harry's. He was just a chicken.

Bentley's Jack is no better. While he didn't condemn his friend’s cowardice with a feather he does use it as justification to make a move on Ethne. Even after learning of Harry's going to Sudan to save him, the weasel hides the information from Ethne whom he intends to marry. As for Hudson, her Ethne might have better been named “plot device,” as she is merely in place to provide motivation to the male leads. Hudson, who was spectacular in Almost Famous, never creates a real character in The Four Feathers, her role could have been played by anyone and had the same impact.

The Four Feathers has the visual style of a sweeping desert war epic, but lacks the heart and ingenuity necessary for epic filmmaking. The Four Feathers suffers in comparison this weekend to the limited re-release of Lawrence Of Arabia, the template for sweeping war epics. Lawrence Of Arabia makes The Four Feathers look like a high school production.

Movie Review How to Train Your Dragon The Hidden World

How to Train Your Dragon The Hidden World (2019) 

Directed by Dean Deblois

Written by Dean Deblois 

Starring Jay Baruchel, America Ferrara, F. Murray Abraham, Gerard Butler, Cate Blanchett, Jonah Hill 

Release Date February 22nd, 2019

Published February 21st, 2019 

How to Train Your Dragon 3 is perhaps the best of the three How to Train Your Dragon movies. None of the How to Train Your Dragon movies have been bad but the first two, for me, have only been passably entertaining. How to Train Your Dragon 3: The Hidden World rounds the series into something with a good deal more depth. Indeed, depth is what the first two movies lacked as they put forward perfunctory stories about learning to believe in yourself. 

How to Train Your Dragon 3: The Hidden World is the first of the franchise to carry the confidence of a movie where characters have tamed and rode dragons into battle. The hero's journey has finally stopped being a slightly bland, mostly amusing coming of age story and has become the story of a fully fledged character finally becoming who he should be. Again, there is nothing wrong with the first two, but I prefer seeing a new story with these characters as opposed to familiar tropes dressed up with dragons. 

How to Train Your Dragon 3: The Hidden World opens with our heroes, Hiccup (Jay Baruchel) and his dragon pal, Toothless, now in the role of dragon defenders. When dragons are kidnapped to be killed or made to serve the forces of evil, Hiccup, Toothless and their friends from the Viking village of Berk, swoop in with fiery swords and free the peaceful dragons and take them home to safety. 

Unfortunately, Berk has become quite overcrowded since our last visit. The place is teeming with dragons and the sheer volume of dragons on hand has not gone unnoticed. A group of bad guys now know where Berk is and they want to steal the dragons in order to create a dragon army. The baddies can’t do it on their own however, so they seek the help of the legendary dragon hunter Grimmel the Grisly (F Murray Abraham). In exchange for capturing the dragons of Berk, Grimmel asks only that he be able to kill Toothless. Grimmel has made his reputation on killing Night Furies.

But how will he ever get close to Berk with all of those Vikings and Dragons? Grimmel has a plan. He’s captured a Light Fury, a white, female counterpart to Toothless and also seemingly the last of her kind. Grimmel will use the Light Fury to lead Toothless into a trap. His plan is solid as Toothless falls in love at first sight with the Light Fury and in a delightful scene, attempts to romance her on the beach with a mating dance. The wordless pantomime of the dragons in this scene is genuine, sweet and funny. 

Director Dean Deblois in his third time as a director, he directed the previous How to Train Your Dragon and Lilo and Stitch prior to this movie, continues to demonstrate his light and deft touch. Deblois is smart about not letting his stories get cluttered with too many bits of business. He may have a lot of colorful characters and voice actors to make use of but he’s very economical about it and never allows a bit to overstay its welcome or bog down the central story. 

The voice cast of How to Train Your Dragon remains top notch with Jay Baruchel as a sturdy lead voice, America Ferrera as the charming romantic idea, Cate Blanchett as the voice of gravitas and seriousness and Jonah Hill, Christopher Mintz Plasse and Kristen Wiig providing solid comic relief. Add to this group, the sonorous tones of Academy Award winner F Murray Abraham as Grimmel and you have an exceptionally talented and charismatic group of voices. 

How to Train Your Dragon 3: The Hidden World is exceptionally well animated with some legitimately breathtaking sights that really stand out in IMAX 3D. The visuals are equalled brilliantly by the Scottish inflected music score by John Powell to create a more vital and mature palette for what is the last of this film trilogy. Much credit to Dean Deblois and Dreamworks in recognizing that there is no need to beat this premise into the ground. This is the final film in a trilogy and they allow it to go out on a note of satisfying and moving finality.

Movie Review I'm Not There

I'm Not There (2007) 

Directed by Todd Haynes 

Written by Todd Haynes

Starring Christian Bale, Cate Blanchett, Richard Gere, Ben Whishaw, Heath Ledger, Charlotte Gainsbourg

Release Date November 21st, 2007

Published November 20th, 2007

Employing six different actors to portray the life of Bob Dylan, director Todd Haynes paints a strange and fascinating portrait of this enigmatic legend. I'm Not There stars 12 year old Marcus Carl Franklin as Woody Guthrie. Riding the rails to New Jersey to visit the real Guthrie who is on his deathbed.

Franklin represents the young Dylan who did indeed visit an ailing Woody Guthrie in a New Jersey hospital and as "Woody Guthrie" tells a pair of hobos in a boxcar he played music with Bobby Vee and wrote songs with Carl Perkins. Watch the segments with Marcus Carl Franklin and the whole of the story of Dylan's life is glimpsed up until his disillusionment in the wake of the JFK assassination.

That Franklin is an African American is a nod to Dylan's roots. Though born in Minnesota, Dylan's music has distinctly southern roots. His music was born listening black bluesmen on the radio. As he got older the country and folk traditions came to dominate his work but the influence of the blues remained, especially in his complex lyrics layered in subtext, bitter sadness and dark humor.

Teenager Ben Whishaw plays Dylan just before stardom. Being interrogated by reporters, this version of Dylan, calling himself "Arthur Rimbaud" is an esoteric poet both cynical and naive yet demonstrating the complex wordplay that would become his trademark.

Christian Bale plays Dylan the rising star. Under the guise of Jack Rollins, this version of Dylan is shy and unassuming, pulled toward stardom reluctantly as he is swept up in the politics of the time and by the love of a fellow artist Alice Fabian (Julianne Moore), who stands in for Joan Baez.

Bale returns late in the film as another Dylan, the born again christian preaching the gospel from the stage but playing only to small audiences of oldsters and their restless young children.The sight of this Dylan playing and proselytizing to small audiences acknowledges one of the many low points of the man's life and another of his unique musical digressions. Dylan recorded two less than stellar gospel albums in the early 80's. 

I'm Not There fractures it's universe with a character named Robbie Clark (Heath Ledger) who, though not a musician, portrays Dylan the family man. Clark is an actor who plays Jack Rollins in a movie. We then watch as Clark meets and falls in love with an artist named Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg). They have two children.

Clark's being an actor is pretty basic symbolism, Dylan played the role of family man without really living it. Ledger inhabits the self absorbed artist well as well as Dylan's fatherly ambivalence with great ease and the kind of charm that only a star can project. Even as a jerk you can see what draws people to him.

Cate Blanchett plays Jude Quinn as Dylan in his cynical, drugged out mid-sixties era. Arguably at his creative peak, this version of Dylan is also at his most self absorbed and combative and Blanchett captures it perfectly, showing exactly why she received an Oscar nomination for this gender bending role.

Blanchett captures Dylan the defiant, Dylan the uncompromising and Dylan the jerk at the time when he was successful enough to be a jerk and get away with it. It was during this period when Dylan went electric and Haynes captures the moment with brief visual jokes that show off not only his but Dylan's underestimated sense of humor.

Arguably the most unusual and inexplicable version of Dylan to emerge in I'm Not There is that portrayed by Richard Gere. As "William Bonney" this version of Dylan may be just how Dylan sees himself, a loner cowboy who fights for truth and justice but is cynical and weary enough to accept that he can't change the world.

My description seems to put these lives of Dylan in a particular order but the film doesn't proceed in a linear fashion. Rather, Director Haynes drops in on these versions of Dylan as if they were different people in different stories and essentially they are united only by the music of Bob Dylan.

Fans of Dylan will be thrilled by the depth of I'm Not There picking up on inside jokes and insights into his motivations that will remain mysterious to those unfamiliar with the legend and his unique life story. I was not familiar with most of the story but rather than being out in the cold, I was intrigued to find out what I was missing.

For me, I'm Not There inspired curiosity and wonder. I wanted to know what I was missing and reading about Dylan only deepened the experience of I'm Not There, even after having seen it. This is a glorious piece of work, inspiring, eclectic and endlessly fascinating.

Though it does drag near the end of its slightly overlong 2 hour 6 minute runtime and the Gere character can seem trying and puzzling, overall the good of I'm Not There far outweighs the bad. The flaws even add a bit of charm to the film as if included as commentary on Dylan's many flaws.

I truly cannot say enough good things about I'm Not There.

Movie Review Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) 

Directed by Steven Spielberg 

Written by David Koepp 

Starring Harrison Ford, Shia Labeouf, Cate Blanchett, Karen Allen, Ray Winstone, John Hurt

Release Date May 22nd, 2008 

Published May 20th, 2008

In full disclosure mode, I write this review while wearing an Indiana Jones t-shirt. The fact is, as long as Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull hit the screen I was going to love it. As an Indy nerd who spent last Thursday watching all three original Indy adventures back to back to back plus a two hour documentary feature, I have waited very impatiently for a new Indiana Jones for 19 years.

As we rejoin the adventure of archaeologist and treasure hunter Henry "Indiana '' Jones Jr it is 1952 and Indy has been kidnapped by Russian infiltrators. They want Indy to help them locate an artifact being held by the US government at Area 51. The artifact is related to a top-secret excavation that Dr. Jones took part in briefly at Roswell New Mexico.

Naturally, Indiana Jones isn't one for treason and after a chase, a gun battle, and another chase, he nearly gets the artifact back. He will need to keep trying to get it because red scare paranoia has the FBI calling him a traitor. Forced out of his teaching gig by the FBI, Indy heads for New York only to be sidetracked by a kid named Mutt (Shia Labeouf).

Mutt has a letter from an old friend of Indy's who claims to have found the lost city of gold and includes a map. With Mutt in tow, Indy heads for South America with the Russians hot on his heels as well. If you guessed that the City of Gold is also related to that Roswell gig, kudos for your observational prowess.

Indiana Jones isn't overly complicated in its plotting but it's not stupid either. The script from George Lucas with some spit polish by three other writers, proceeds with a similar logic to the first three Indy films balancing outlandish supernatural phenomena with old school adventure movie thrills.

Steven Speilberg's direction is relaxed and assured like an old friend retelling a story we've heard before but with just as much energy, vigor and life as ever before. Working with Oscar winner Janusz Kaminski there is a little extra polish to the old school look of Indy but not so much as to distract from the old time feel.

Harrison Ford is restored to his world-weary charming self as Indiana Jones. His persona seeming ever more strained and stressed in his most recent action movie roles, Ford is chilled out and laid back as Indy and he has not lost a bit of the light touch humor and hard ass tough guy persona that has made Indiana Jones an icon.

I was going to love this movie just for existing; so imagine how geeked I am that Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is so awesome. Great story, great direction, great acting, welcome back Karen Allen, welcome Cate Blanchett and Shia Labeouf and Ray Winstone, everything about Kingdom of the Crystal Skull works.

I love this movie.

Movie Review Ponyo

Ponyo (2008) 

Directed by Hiyao Miyazaki 

Written by Hiyao Miyazaki 

Starring Liam Neeson, Cate Blanchett, Noah Cyrus, Frankie Jonas

Release Date July 19th, 2008 

Published July 20th, 2008 

I am running low on adjectives to describe Hiyao Miyazaki. The creator of some of the finest animation I have ever seen has given us so many delights over the years that I am almost at a loss to describe them. His Princess Mononoke, Spirited Away and Howl's Moving Castle are rivaled only by the works of Pixar in terms of the finest works of animated film art created in the last decade. Now, Miyazaki is back with yet another lyrical, moving animated masterpiece. Ponyo is a children's movie with more imagination and wonder than any ten non-Pixar animated movies released in the last decade.

Ponyo is the story of a little girl who begins her life as a fish. Ponyo is the offspring of a strange scientist (Voice of Liam Neeson) who somehow keeps the ocean in balance with humanity, though he is tiring of the task. Ponyo's mother meanwhile, is the Gran Mamare (Voice of Cate Blanchett, as ethereal as ever) who I believe is mother nature herself but you can watch and decide for yourself on that point. Regardless, the story follow's Ponyo's longing to discover the world beyond the water.

She gets the chance when she sneaks out and takes a ride on a jellyfish all the way to the surface of the ocean. There, she happens on the shore where Sosuke is playing. It's love at first sight. Sosuke scoops Ponyo up in a bucket and thinking she is just a goldfish, Sosuke excitedly hopes that he can make her a pet. However, when she heals a cut on his finger, he realizes there is something really magical about his new friend. Soon, Ponyo is talking and professing her love for her new friend Sosuke.

Unfortunately, Ponyo's move to the surface has consequences. As she moves to become more human, the ocean becomes unbalanced as Ponyo's father searches for her in hopes of keeping her a little fish forever. If Sosuke can prove he truly loves Ponyo she may be able to become human but he will have to find a way to show it before the seas rise and destroy and destroy the world. Sosuke will also have to navigate around Ponyo's father and try to convince him of true love. 

There is a distinct and prominent environmentalist streak running through Ponyo but it takes a back seat to the wondrous imagery of the great Hayao Miyazaki. Watch for the scene where Ponyo returns to the surface for the first time as a little girl and runs atop the roiling waves, the visual is an absolute delight. The glee with which Ponyo waves her arms and smiles with every part of lovely face is so awesome, a complete delight to behold. 

Ponyo is filled with childlike wonder and makes exceptional use of the child voice talents of young Noah Cyrus as Ponyo and Frankie Jonas as Sosuke. Cyrus of the famous older sister Miley, and Frankie, youngest of the famous Jonas family, capture in their young voices the unpracticed delight only a child can deliver. The young voices are crucial to Ponyo as these young characters must deliver wonder and excitement as only a child can. 

One can no longer be surprised by the brilliance of Miyazaki. And yet, I was somehow still blown away by Ponyo. Minus the occasional fright images that are as much a Miyazaki trademark as his childlike wonder, the director delivers a work of pure, joyous imagination. Ponyo is Miyazaki's take on the Hans Christian Anderson tale, The Little Mermaid and when you begin to recognize the story it adds even more gleeful exhilaration. 

The metaphor at play in Ponyo of a father wanting his child to remain a child forever is wonderfully poignant, especially under the care of Miyazaki. The great master animator has a love for the stories of children growing both emotionally and physically, aging toward new and wonderful experiences while maintaining the naïve innocence of childhood. I mentioned some horror imagery and it is there but it has meaning and purpose. As much as childhood and growing up is filled with wonder, it's also fraught with fears and anxieties that will either be overcome or become part of the future of each child. None of what I just wrote is in the text of Ponyo but the implication is powerful and it's what makes him such a master storyteller, layers upon layers of meaning that Miyazaki seemingly invites you to find in his work. 

Ponyo is one of the best movies of the year.

Movie Review Robin Hood (2010)

Robin Hood (2010) 

Directed by Sir Ridley Scott 

Written by Brian Helgeland 

Starring Russell Crowe, Danny Huston, Scott Grimes, Cate Blanchett, Oscar Isaac, Mark Addy 

Release Date May 14th, 2010 

Published May 13th, 2010 

Russell Crowe is a superstar and despite his personality defects, prickly interviews and phone throwing incidents, Crowe's films have always showcased his natural charisma. As was said of classic male movie stars of the past 'Men want to be him, Women want to be with him.' That has been the essence of Russell Crowe.

Lately however, Crowe has chafed against this persona and his ache to pursue a different reputation led to a terrific performance as a roguish and paunchy reporter in “State of Play” and now a buffed up action hero “Robin Hood.” While the movie “Robin Hood” rewrites the English legend, Crowe rewrites his own history essaying Robin as a stoic, charmless action hero that could as easily been played by Vin Diesel.

As King Richard (Danny Huston) wages war in France following a trip to Palestine and Israel in the Crusades, Robin Longstride is one of the King's Archers for hire. No longer entirely loyal to the crown following a horrific massacre of Muslims, Robin Longstride is soon to leave and return to England.

Joining Robin are his long time friends and fellow Archers Will Scarlett (Scott Grimes) and Alan A'Dayle (Alan Doyle) and his onetime antagonist turned loyal friend Little John (Kevin Durand, in a rare good guy role). The way back to England leads to the discovery of a French ambush on English Knights. King Richard is dead and his crown is to be returned to England along with an ancient sword that belongs to Sir Robert Locksley (Douglas Hodge).

Robin and his merry men will return to England dressed as knights, return the crown and reap a reward, or so they had hoped. Winding up in Nottingham to return the sword, Robin meets Lady Marion (Cate Blanchett), Locksley's wife and Sir William Locksley (Max Von Sydow) who engages Longstride in a deal, Robin will take on the role of his son in order to maintain the lands after his death; he will also become husband to Lady Marion.

Meanwhile, as the craven Prince John becomes King John, the French plot an invasion to take advantage of the Royal chaos. Stoking the fires is King John's best friend Godfrey (Mark Strong) who has joined with the French and is leading the invasion. Needless to say, Robin, his merry men, and the people of Nottingham get caught in the midst of all of this intrigue and many a sword is swung and arrow flown.

Directed by the brilliant Sir Ridley Scott, “Robin Hood” treads very similar ground to his Oscar winning epic “Gladiator” and his massive flop, the crusades epic “Kingdom of Heaven.” Scott has a great deal of love for the ancient world, warrior codes and the brotherhood of war. He evokes the age exceptionally well with detailed landscapes and costumes, well used CGI and some terrific cinematography.

Where “Kingdom of Heaven” failed is in the same way “Robin Hood” comes up short; both films swamp the viewer with the ugliness and depravity of the ancient world and leave little for people to enjoy beyond the carnage. Characters suffer because Scott's attention to period detail apparently means depicting men with courage minus charisma and charm.

While Cate Blanchett is allowed to look radiant even while covered in mud, Russell Crowe plays Robin subdued, withdrawn and modestly tortured. His bravery is evident in battle and you can see why his men are loyal to him but he comes up short in the aspects of personality that make him a compelling movie character.

Mirthless, constipated and withdrawn, the Crowe that was so captivating in “Gladiator” and so charming in “State of Play'' is caked in mud and blood and is basically part of the scenery in “Robin Hood'' until the battle scenes awaken his warrior side. The battle stuff is very good, almost the equal of “Gladiator,” but “Robin Hood '' is over 2 hours and 20 minutes long and the battle scenes are merely a third of that run time.

“Robin Hood '' has moments that are as amusing as any classic action epic but the quiet moments are so quiet that lethargy sets in and the audience begins to withdraw nearly as much as Mr. Crowe does. The battle returns the Russell Crowe we’ve come to enjoy then he recedes and we wonder where is the star, where is the spirited rebel. Is Russell Crowe so desperate to create a new persona that he can no longer find joy in his work

If he can’t enjoy it, how can we enjoy it?

Movie Review: Contraband

Contraband (2012) 

Directed by Baltasar Kormakur 

Written by Aaron Guzikowski

Starring Mark Wahlberg, Kate Beckinsale, Giovanni Ribisi, Caleb Landry Jones, J.K Simmons, Ben Foster 

Release Date January 12th, 2012 

Published January 11th, 2012 

Contraband is a mediocre action movie that rises above mediocre because Mark Wahlberg is so darn compelling. I've been a Mark Wahlberg fan for years; despite his having starred in such duds as The Happening, Maxx Payne, and Shooter. Wahlberg simply has that intangible star quality that makes you want to follow him on whatever film journey he's taking. Contraband could not survive with a lesser star.

Chris Farraday (Wahlberg) was once known as the Houdini of the smuggling world. With his sidekick Sebastian (Ben Foster), Farraday could smuggle anything without ever getting caught. Now, Farraday is a civilian, running his own security company, happily married to Kate (Kate Beckinsale) and raising two sons. He’s gone soft, he’s gone legit, and anyone who’s ever seen a movie about a bad guy gone good already knows where Contraband is headed. 

Yup, Farraday is dragged back into the smuggling underworld when his boneheaded brother in law Andy (Caleb Landry Jones) pulls a drug smuggling job and ends up dumping the drugs in the river when Customs boards his boat. Not surprisingly, Andy's employer, Briggs (Giovanni Ribisi), is none too happy and he wants Chris to pay Andy's debt or else. Pulled back into the business, Farraday calls on Sebastian for one more run. 

There are no surprises in this set up; Contraband is not original or unexpected. What works in Contraband is the businesslike, conservative approach of director Baltasar Kormakur who gets down to the business of smuggling with only the most necessary bits of exposition. When Mark Wahlberg and his crew finally get on a ship ready to smuggle the pace is methodical and to the point.

Giovanni Ribisi is not exactly the most intimidating bad guy one could imagine and this does undermine a few scenes where he's supposed to be playing tough. One scene that will test an audience's ability to suspend belief finds the wiry Ribisi pushing around Kate Beckinsale. Anyone who's seen and enjoyed the Underworld movies knows Kate Beckinsale could snap Ribisi like a twig if she wanted.

(Yes, I'm aware that movie magic makes Beckinsale a badass vampire in "Underworld;" I was being cute.)

The key to raising Contraband above other, similar action thrillers is Mark Wahlberg. Since his bold and ballsy Oscar nominated work in The Departed Wahlberg has really come into his own as a movie star and that movie star quality is the one thing working in favor of Contraband. Without Mark Wahlberg, Contraband is an exceptionally average movie. See "Contraband" for Mark Wahlberg or maybe to chuckle at Giovanni Ribisi's tattooed tough guy; both are strong reasons to see "Contraband."

Movie Review The Devil Inside

The Devil Inside (2012) 

Directed by William Brent Bell 

Written by William Brent Bell, Matthew Peterman 

Starring Fernanda Andrade, Simon Quarterman, Evan Helmuth, Suzan Crowley 

Release Date January 6th, 2012 

Published January 6th, 2012 

The Devil Inside is a 78 minute advertisement for a website. There’s a chance I should have said ‘spoiler alert’ before telling you that but frankly this movie does not deserve my discretion. The Devil Inside is a con job. This is a fraud of a movie that leads audiences to the singularly most unsatisfying ending to a movie I’ve seen in my many years as a movie critic.The film ends with a massive car wreck and an invitation to see how it turned out on the film’s website. Spoiler Alert. 

The Devil Inside begins as a rip off of The Last Exorcism, a rare really great found footage horror film from 2010, as we get a fake documentary about exorcism told at first from a skeptical perspective. Quickly however, the skepticism gives way to the cliched bone crunching, head-spinning, potty mouthed demon spectacle that the exorcism genre calls for. There is, after all, no such thing as a polite and well-mannered or thoughtful demon.

Relative unknown actress Fernanda Andrade stars in The Devil Inside as Isabella Rossi, the daughter of a killer. Isabella’s mother, Maria Rossi (Suzan Crowley), murdered three members of her church as they were performing an exorcism… on her. Through some mysterious machinations of the church Maria ends up transferred to a hospital in Rome under the treatment of Vatican doctors.

It’s an interesting idea and for a short time director William Brent Bell even manages to keep you engaged. The cracks however in this deeply flawed film, begin to show through after Isabella and her documentary making pal Michael (Ionut Grama) have traveled to Italy and hooked up with a pair of priests, Ben (Simon Quarterman) and David (Evan Helmuth), who run an illegal side business as exorcists for hire.

Once the exorcists take a shot at saving Isabella’s mother, the movie careens downhill toward its controversial ending. The ending of The Devil Inside left the audience I was with seething with anger and demanding their money back after the screening. There were boos, people throwing trash, and some derisive laughter at the expense of the movie. Not that the filmmakers would care, they’d already received their paychecks for this nonsense. 

There is nothing even the least bit redeeming about The Devil Inside. The film is a flimsy con-job; it’s two thirds of a movie sold for the full price of a ticket. The ending invites audiences to visit a website to find out more about Isabella Rossi. I won’t publicize the website here as it is merely an extension of the filmmakers’ failure to come up with an ending. Even if the ending were satisfying, the gimmick of not having an ending has already soured any goodwill the movie might have had. Plus, it wasn’t very good for the first two acts, the ending was not going to save The Devil Inside from ignominy. 

Instead of an ending we get a novelty; a failing attempt to bridge the gap between the movie screen and the internet.  This was an idea that was destined to fail and fail miserably. Admittedly, I can’t say how many people followed up and went to the website following the movie. But, I have a hard time imagining that many did. The reaction from the crowd that I witnessed the night that The Devil Inside debuted was not excitement about a new way to merge movies and the internet. This was an angry mob seething with resentment and a rueful desire for some form of revenge. 

Movie Review P2

P2 (2007) 

Directed by Franck Khalfoun 

Written by Alexandre Aja, Franck Khalfoun, Gregory Levasseur

Starring Wes Bentley, Rachel Nichols

Release Date November 9th, 2007

Published November 8th, 2007

Alexandre Aja has been undistinguished in two outings as a writer-director, High Tension and The Hills Have Eyes. Still, Aja does show a sense of how to work in this genre and that shows in his work as a producer and co-writer of the new horror thriller P2. Handing the directorial reigns to talented newcomer Franck Khalfoun, Aja's hands off approach works and the best instincts of his work show through.

Angela (Rachel Nichols) never thought staying late at work was a bad thing, even on a holiday. Sure, her whole family was waiting for her but she had numbers to crunch and no boyfriend waiting to go with her. She could afford a few more minutes, or so she thought. On this night, Christmas Eve, staying late was the worst idea possible. The last to leave among her office mates, Angela will have to walk through the creepy parking garage all by herself, save for that one parking attendant with far away stare. 

That parking attendant is named Thomas (Wes Bentley), and unbeknownst to Angela, he has had a secret crush on. Moreover, Thomas has decided that tonight is the night he will reveal his feelings. Did he buy her flowers? Candy? Make her a mixtape? No,Thomas is something of a social misfit. His idea of courtship involves a chloroform soaked rag and some handcuffs. Whether Angela likes it or not she is joining Thomas for a holiday meal.

What director Frank Khalfoun does in P2 is take strong advantage of the one unique thing about this plot, the setting. Parking garages are inherently creepy places, all dark corners and echoes. Khalfoun makes this underground garage into an underground maze of darkness and disturbing noises. Also, the garage setting turns the classic cliche of a cellphone with no signal into a necessary plot point as opposed to a merely convenient one.

The holiday setting, the movie takes place on Christmas Eve, is also a clever trick. It closes the parking garage and gives our main characters plenty of uninterrupted room to run and play hide and seek. The film also makes great use of Elvis' Blue Christmas turning the hacky holiday classic into a creepy, funny running gag.

We haven't seen Wes Bentley much since he exploded on to the scene with his touchingly oddball performance in American Beauty. He failed to take advantage of the buzz following that film and has since picked up his highest profile paycheck as the lame bad guy in Ghost Rider. Strange to say, this is the best performance of Bentley's career since American Beauty. What Bentley gives Thomas is this odd sort of cornpone romantic crossed with a Johnny Depp style antic psychopath.

He's also quite funny. Keep an ear out for one of the best lines of the year when Thomas whines about not wanting to lose his job. Rachel Nichols, heretofore unknown to me, isn't given much to play but give her credit for not making all of the cliched choices of a victim in this situation. Her Angela is smart but she's not McGyver, she doesn't adapt to this situation as if it were second nature. She is no match for Thomas's brand of crazy but she has luck on her side.

The closer of P2 features yet another funny line featuring that one thing a man should never say to a woman. The ending is all too typical, but I never said the film broke the mold. This is just a director and cast that takes on genre conventions and simply performs them slightly more entertainingly than the several thousand genre clones before it. Franck Khalfoun doesn't remake the genre he just makes good use of his genre tools. P2 is just a little smarter. The film has a bit more polish than the dozen or so directors who have worked with the same genre material. P2 is an exceptional thriller/horror genre movie.

Movie Review A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) 

Directed by Samuel Bayer 

Written by Wesley Strick, Eric Heisserer

Starring Rooney Mary, Jackie Earl Haley, Kyle Gallner, Katie Cassidy, Thomas Dekker, Kellen Lutz

Release Date April 30th, 2010

Published April 29th, 2010 

Lather rinse repeat; simple instructions very easy to follow. I cannot help but speculate that director Samuel Bayer received similar instructions as he approached remaking the horror classic “Nightmare on Elm Street.” Good looking teenager falls asleep, Freddy kills good looking teenager in dream, repeat. This re-imagining of the horror icon Freddy Krueger is like most remakes merely a faded, facsimile of the original. The film is something akin to an “American Idol” contestant's version of a Beatles song; it doesn't sound that bad but lacks the heart, soul, and creative energy of the original.

Jackie Earl Haley replaces the one and only Robert Englund in the iconic role of gardener turned child murder Freddy Krueger. In this version of the story Freddy was a beloved figure who lived and worked at a day school where the kids adored him. That all changed when one little girl, Nancy, told her parents about Freddy's fun cave in the basement. Years later, after Freddy's death, the kids who attended that day school are finally reuniting and with their memories re-emerging, so has Freddy Krueger, who begins attacking and killing them in their dreams. Only Nancy (Rooney Mara) is capable of slowing Freddy's bloodlust.

There is nothing really all that wrong with this version of “Nightmare on Elm Street” from a technical perspective. Director Samuel Bayer, a veteran of music videos, knows how to aim the camera and how to use angle and light for the creation of tension and suspense and he has a good eye for gore. What Bayer is lacking is a story of any depth and characters worth investing in and identifying with. Writers Wesley Strick and Eric Heisserer operate from the recipe detailed in the opening paragraph - cute teen sleeps, cute teen killed, repeat. The settings for the deaths are generally the same; Freddy's creepy boiler room remains a creep-tastic setting even if that steam or smoke is still unexplained.

Heather Langenkamp had a winning combination of earnestness and determination and with that wonderful quiver in her voice she won us over and had audiences rooting for her survival even as Freddy was the more entertaining and charismatic of this deathly duo. Rooney Mara taking over the role of Nancy is basically filler. Someone needed to play the role and Ms. Mara was sufficiently attractive and available to fill the bill. Not much is asked of this mostly unknown actress and she gives just about what she gets from the weak script.

The rest of the cast is made up of pretty faces who line up as victim 1, 2, 3 and so on. The film ends on a strong note but I won't go into that too much other than to say that even fans of the original “Nightmare” will be impressed. It's fair to wonder that as a film critic I have seen too much. I have seen so many horror films and I am hard to impress and even harder to frighten. That's fair but I can recognize technique and I am aware when something works for a mass audience and something doesn't. The engaged audience member will likely recognize, as I did, the dearth of character development and the rerun nature of Freddy's kills.

However, those audiences not in fealty to the original as I am and more inclined to forgive the film its many repeats; those giving in to the legend of Freddy Krueger, well rehashed by the far too talented for this Jackie Earl Haley, may find themselves leaping in their seats and watching the movie through their fingers. If you are forgiving, enjoy “Nightmare on Elm Street” redux. Myself, I am going to watch Johnny Depp get sucked into his bed and explode in a geyser of blood in one of the greatest deaths of all time from Wes Craven's original “Nightmare.”

Movie Review Once Upon a Time in Mexico

Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003) 

Directed by Robert Rodriguez 

Written by Robert Rodriguez 

Starring Antonio Banderas, Johnny Depp, Salma Hayek, Mickey Rourke, Eva Mendes, Willem Dafoe

Release Date September 12th, 2003

Published September 11th, 2003 

The Auteur Theory states that the director is the author of a film. The auteur is a director whose sole artistic vision is fully realized with little compromise. Many of our most prominent directors can fit the definition of an auteur, but few can live up to the definition as much as Robert Rodriguez can. In his latest film, Once Upon A Time In Mexico, Rodriguez is credited as writer, director, producer, cinematographer, editor, production designer, and composer of the film's score. He did everything but key lights and hold the boom mic. If that is not realizing a singular vision, I don't know what is. And that singular vision is a spectacular shoot'em up that may be light on story but makes up for it with style.

Antonio Banderas returns to the role of the nameless mariachi player from El Mariachi and Desperado who dispenses justice and tunes from a killer guitar case. Having gone into hiding after the death of his wife (Salma Hayek in flashback) and child, the mariachi is brought out of retirement to kill the man who killed his family, General Marquez (Gerardo Vigil).

The mysterious man who brought the mariachi out of retirement is a shady American CIA agent named Sands (Johnny Depp). Agent Sands is carrying out a thin-ice tap dance that is playing a number of Mexican factions against each other, with Sands ending up 10 million dollars richer. He has hired the Mariachi to kill General Marquez and the General to kill the unpopular Mexican President. Sands has a major drug dealer named Barillo (Willem Dafoe) to finance the General and an ex-FBI agent (Ruben Blades) to kill the drug dealer.

Confusing? Maybe, but it doesn't matter because Johnny Depp is so damn cool. Whether the plot makes any sense or if the scheme works or doesn't work, makes little difference to Robert Rodriguez or the audience because it's all about Depp. Like a plot magician Depp does parlor tricks that make your plot reservations disappear. Whether it's Rodriguez's quick witted script or Depp's stylish delivery it all works and it's all so cool.

For his part as the lead, Banderas slips comfortably back into his Mariachi costume. It's one of the rare roles in which Banderas seems comfortable. Maybe it's because it's his third go around in the role or maybe it's his friendly director, but Banderas realizes the potential stardom that so many have expected of him, but only in this role. Any other role and Banderas appears lost.

This film's place in the El Mariachi/Desperado, line is unclear to me; it's been too long since I've seen those two films. Luckily, there is no need to remember the first two films beyond the vaguest details. Flashbacks with Salma Hayek as the Mariachi's wife are effective in providing backstory and are as stylish and cool as the scenes that surround them.

One of the things that makes Rodriguez's multi-hyphenate performance possible is the way in which he takes advantage of the most modern film technology. Using a top-of-the-line Sony digital camera, Rodriguez becomes the first filmmaker that I have seen use digital in a way that transfers to regular film stock without looking awful. His shooting style is just as impressive, entirely handheld without looking handheld. This makes Once Upon A Time In Mexico, an important moment in digital and independent filmmaking. See it for Johnny Depp. Respect it for the true independent spirit at work in its creation.