Movie Review: Dreamcatcher

Dreamcatcher (2003) 

Directed by Lawrence Kasden

Written by William Goldman 

Starring Morgan Freeman, Thomas Jane, Jason Lee, Damian Lewis, Timothy Olyphant, Donnie Wahlberg

Release Date March 21st, 2003

Published March 20th, 2003 

For once Stephen King is publicly saying he likes a movie made from one of his books. Always his work’s harshest critic, King claims to never have been fully satisfied with any screen adaptation. However, the newest King adaptation, Dreamcatcher, has earned his seal of approval. That is likely because it is the most too-the-word adaptation of any of King's work. Dreamcatcher seems to go out of it's way to be faithful to King's vision, some might say that’s a good thing, some like myself disagree.

In Dreamcatcher we meet four guys, friends since childhood, who share the unique ability to communicate telepathically and read people’s minds. This ability stems from a childhood incident when they saved a retarded boy nicknamed Duddits from a group of bullies. Now adults, the four friends, Henry (Thomas Jane), Jonesy (Daniel Lewis), Beaver (Jason Lee) and Pete (Timothy Olyphant) planning a trip to a shared cabin in the woods. The trip is called off when Jonesy is nearly killed in a sick looking car accident.

Cut to six months later and the friends finally make it to the cabin. Jonesy, having survived the accident, seems normal but tells his friends that the accident was caused by a vision of their childhood friend Duddits. He doesn't blame Duddits for the accident but cannot explain the strange vision and especially how he survived the horrific accident.

This setup is very intriguing with good chemistry among the four actors and the character development and the use of the telepathy is very engaging. It entices the audience into what one hopes is an examination of these characters and theie abilities. Unfortunately, this is where Dreamcatcher flies off the rails and turns into yet another sci-fi/ horror schlockfest.

It is at this point that we meet Morgan Freeman and his insane General Kurtz. Kurtz is tracking the crash of an alien ship that contains aliens intent on spreading a virus that could wipe out humanity. As Kurtz searches for the ship, our four friends are witnesses to some freaky stuff. While Henry and Pete go on a beer run, Jonesy and Beaver take in a hunter who was lost in the woods. The hunter is very ill, as the number of loud farts coming out of him attest. It's not long before Jonesy and Beaver find out what's wrong with the guy, in a scene that makes John Hurt's ET indigestion in Alien look tame.

Now with Morgan Freeman in the film it would seem impervious to being bad, but oh how wrong you are. In fact, it is Freeman who provides many of the unintentionally funny moments of the film. Woefully miscast as a crazy man, Freeman should be playing the good guy role that went to Tom Sizemore. After all, who could possibly play crazy opposite Tom Sizemore? It’s worth noting that naming Freeman's General Kurtz is a cute little allusion to Apocolypse Now.

I mentioned just how faithful Dreamcatcher is to it's source material and though I haven't read it, I'm sure it is. What so many people don't realize about Stephen King's writing is, is how blatantly uncommercial it is. Oh sure it sells millions of copies, but that doesn't tell you how many people bought the book and were unable to make it all the way through it. This is the problem in faithfully adapting a King novel because most of his novels are far more gruesome than anyone would ever want to film.

Dreamcatcher, in being faithful to the original, took a risk that the disgusting elements of the writing and the outrageous plot twists would cause audiences to turn away or even walk out. Props for taking the risk, however it failed miserably.

Apparently Dreamcatcher isn't one of King's best because if this is a faithful adaptation it's an absolute mess. From ridiculous looking rejects from the Alien movies, to the cringe inducing dialogue, Dreamcatcher is at times a painful moviegoing experience. Schlocky sci-fi/horror on par with Resident Evil and Jason Goes to Space, or whatever the hell they called that Friday the 13th dud.

It's a real shame because the opening 35-40 minutes are pretty good and Director Lawrence Kasdan does a good job of building suspense throughout the beginning of the film. Why he drifted into horror movie cliches and sci-fi nastiness at a certain point in the film is maddening. It's a shame Kasdan decided to remain faithful to King when a director of his skill could have taken the strong start and taken the story in a more interesting direction.

Movie Review: Boat Trip

Boat Trip (2003) 

Directed by Mort Nathan

Written by Mort Nathan 

Starring Cuba Gooding Jr. Horatio Sanz, Roger Moore, Vivica A. Fox 

Release Date March 21st 2003 

Published March 20th, 2003 

It is a testament to just how good Cuba Gooding Jr. was in his Oscar winning role in Jerry Maguire that people like myself have so willingly ignored the number of awful films he's made. 

This is the guy who even after a breakout role in Boyz in The Hoodmade the decision to star opposite Paul Hogan in Lightning Jack as a mute sidekick. A man who since winning an Oscar has made the films Chill Factor, Instinct, Rat Race, and Snow Dogs and done so with a straight face. So I shouldn't be surprised when Gooding turns out another abysmal film with his new comedy Boat Trip. I once again walked in with my Jerry Maguire rose colored glasses on and once again left disappointed.

In Boat Trip, Gooding plays Jerry, recently dumped by his fiancée (Vivica A. Fox) and wallowing in self-pity. That is until his buddy Nick (Horatio Sanz) books them on a singles cruise. Unfortunately for Jerry and Nick, when they booked the cruise they ticked off the travel agent (Will Ferrell, in a cameo) that decides to book them on a gay cruise.

In a scene that defies believability and credibility to an astounding degree, Jerry and Nick manage to board the ship without noticing the number of men holding hands and the odd lack of women anywhere on the boat. It isn't until the boat has left and the two friends sit in the boat's bar with Roger Moore as a rich gay guy and he tells them they are on a gay cruise. Well needless to say this leads to a stream of homophobic ranting with Nick and Jerry screaming and yelling as if they were going down on the Titanic.

So of course the next logical step once they realize they are on a gay cruise, well of course you pretend to be a couple so that Jerry can seduce the ship’s lone female dance instructor, played by Roselyn Sanchez. Meanwhile Sanz's homophobic Nick comes to think he may be gay because he enjoys playing poker with gay guys.

If that doesn't illustrate the exquisite pain that is Boat Trip, try sprinkling in lame attempts at Farrelly Brothers style gross out humor. Writer/director Mort Nathan knows how to ape the histrionics of a Farrelly Brothers comedy but what he can't do is match the Farrelly's sweetness that tempers their worst gags. The Farrellys know that for the audience to tolerate the gross out stuff it has be in the service of characters we like. Boat Trip never for one moment establishes characters we like. Both Gooding and Sanz mug and preen and deliver dialogue in service of the plot but never for a moment act. They never connect with the audience and never rise above caricatures, while the supporting cast exist as plot points and sight gags.

I feel it necessary to hit the filmmakers for their use of Roselyn Sanchez in the film. True, she is a beautiful woman who I don't mind seeing in sexy, slinky outfits that barely cover her. However, the misogynistic attention paid to her and other female cast members is the kind of ancient, Neanderthal behavior relegated to the worst of Russ Meyer. But to Meyer's credit, he never attempted to hide his misogyny inside a mainstream feature. 

Movie Review: Willard

Willard (2003) 

Directed by Glen Morgan 

Written by Glen Morgan 

Starring Crispin Glover, Laura Elena Herring R. Lee Ermey

Release Date March 14th, 2003 

Published March 14th, 2003 

Years ago, Dennis Miller joked that Arab-Israeli peace agreements are about as stable as Crispin Glover. I didn't get the reference at the time but a friend explained that it stemmed from a rather vivid crack up Glover performed in one of his films. After watching Glover's latest film, the rat-filled Willard, I really get the joke.

In Willard, Glover is the titular Willard Stiles. He’s a shy, to the point of aberration, bookish desk jockey at a company once owned by his late father. The company is now run by his father’s ex-partner Mr. Smith (R. Lee Ermey), an evil tyrant who makes a habit of humiliating Willard. Things aren't much better for Willard at home where his rattled mother (Jackie Burroughs) monitors his every move. Constantly nosy and critical, it's not hard to imagine why Willard is so self-hating. And to top it all off Willard has a serious rat infestation in his basement. At first Willard attempts to get rid of the rats but they are a little too clever for his traps. Then Willard captures a little white rat, but rather than get rid of it he forms a bond with the rodent and names him Socrates.

Socrates is Willard's only friend, though a new co-worker played by Mulholland Drive's Laura Elena Herring has, for some unknown reason, taken an interest in Willard. Unfortunately, Willard is too socially retarded to return her interest, preferring instead to bond with Socrates and his rat buddies who are beginning to fill the basement to capacity. One of the rats is a monster that Willard dubs Big Ben. Now of course Ben is just a rat, but because he is so freakishly large the rat communicates a menace that is well played for comedy and horror.

Though things are getting crowded and the rats are coming out of the basement, especially Big Ben, Willard puts up with it and begins training the rats to do his bidding. The rat’s first order of business is to help Willard get revenge on his boss by eating the tires on the boss’s car. From there however, Willard begins to lose control of his little friends and after they start killing, Willard must figure a way to get rid of the rats without becoming dinner himself.

Willard is as you may already know a remake of a 1971 horror cult classic starring Bruce Davison, referenced in this film as Willard's dad. Whether that classifies this film as a sequel or not, I'm not sure. There are reasons to believe it may have been merely an homage to the original by Director Glenn Morgan and partner James Wong. This version of Willard retains the lead character’s name and the names of the originals “lead rats.”

The special effects in Willard are not bad, a mixture of CGI and animatronics makes for effectively creepy looking rodents. Director Glen Morgan seems to have gone to painstaking lengths to make the rats as realistic-looking as possible, including covering the floors with rat droppings for yet another realistic touch.

Ultimately, I didn't get what I was looking for from Willard. I knew going in that it wasn't necessarily a horror film, with many reviews calling it a horror comedy. However the film delivers only a few laughs and fewer scares. I was hoping for a sort of campy cult classic along the lines of the original Willard and it's oddball sequel Ben. Sadly, only a couple of scenes effectively capture that camp mood. One scene with an unfortunate cat that gets dumped in Willard's house is made over-the-top-hilarious by the soundtrack’s employment of Michael Jackson's unbelievably weird tune “Ben.” That scene provides the film’s only solid laughs, unless of course you’re a big fan of cats.

The filmmakers were smart to cast Glover who's skittishness and creepy Goth look plays perfectly against the film’s dark backgrounds. Glover has the look of porcelain in a kiln on the verge of exploding. Unfortunately, the film never establishes a tone or a direction. It's not scary or funny and it's not much of a thriller either. Props to the creators for actually garnering my sympathy for a rat. Willard's favorite, Socrates, is cute and I was surprised to care when he was in danger.

Morgan and Wong, former X-Files producers, and the twisted minds behind the original and far superior Final Destination, never seem to find the tone they were searching for which leaves the film aimless and unfulfilled. It's a shame because I wanted to like this film.

Movie Review: Bend it Like Beckham

Bend it Like Beckham (2003) 

Directed by Gurinder Chadha 

Written by Paul Mayeda Berges

Starring Parminder Nagra, Keira Knightley, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Juliet Stevenson, Archie Panjabi 

Release Date March 12th, 2003 

Published March 12th, 2003 

In the recent British release 28 Days Later, a virus spreads across Britain turning people into mindless zombies. We here in a America have known that virus for years, it emanates from Hollywood in the form of banal crowd-pleasing comedies that are all things to all demographics. Family friendly without a trace of irony, these films exist solely as cash machines and appeal to moviegoing zombies who can't take the time to think about why they are laughing as long as they are not offended. 

Sadly, the British import Bend It Like Beckham, shows this virus is spreading globally from Britain where the film is set, to India, where the film’s director Gurinder Chadha is from.

Bend It Like Beckham is a reference to worldwide Soccer superstar David Beckham and his impressive ability to make a soccer ball twist in midair and sail around a goalie. Beckham is the hero of the film’s star Jesminda Bhamra, a soccer player in her own right who hopes to play professionally someday. Unfortunately, Jesminda's traditional Indian family has already mapped out her future. She is to attend a university close to home, get a degree, learn to cook Indian food, and marry an Indian boy, just as her mother did and just as her sister is about to do. Jesminda however, has a dream that is much stronger than any familial tradition. 

The call of the soccer field however is unavoidable and after meeting a new friend, Juliet played by Keira Knightley, Jesminda finds her way onto a competitive soccer team with a chance to play for college scouts. This opportunity then opens the door to go to America and perhaps, a chance to play soccer professionally.

Of course, this plot is loaded with contrived roadblocks from Jesminda's numerous lies to her parents about her playing to the soccer team coach (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) who both Jesminda and Juliet are attracted to. The film throws up so many roadblocks that it stops and starts like rush hour traffic. The one funny subplot in the film involves Juliet's mother played by Juliet Stevenson and her mistaken belief that her daughter and Jesminda are more than friends. The subplot is sitcom level but well executed by Stevenson, a veteran of British comedy.

The rest of the film is a lifeless set of clichés that never amount to much more than plot contrivance. There are no stakes in the film. One never senses that Jesminda's goal is in jeopardy. Obviously there will be happy ending, it is after all a comedy, but the film still has to have something interesting happen to get to that happy ending, but it never does. Nothing more than recycled cliches from better and worse films.

The comparison to My Big Fat Greek Wedding is obvious, the setup is almost identical and both films are generic, inoffensive crowd pleasers. However, some have also compared it with the Indian film Monsoon Wedding, a comparison that Bend It Like Beckham does not hold up to. Films like Monsoon Wedding and another woman on the verge movie, Real Women Have Curves, are exactly the movies that expose Beckham's worst qualities. Both of those films are daring and emotional and have humor that comes not from contrivance but from real life experience.

The most disappointing element of Bend It Like Beckham is that it was directed by the very talented Gurinder Chadha. Chadha's previous effort, the extended family drama What's Cooking, was a lovely, intelligent film with real characters with real problems. The characters in Bend It Like Beckham are pleasing archetypes that are easy to like because they have no sharp edges. They are inoffensive, easy on the eyes and completely unchallenging. In other words, they're exactly what Hollywood is looking for.

Movie Review: Bringing Down the House

Bringing Down the House (2003) 

Directed by Adam Shankman 

Written by Jason Filardi 

Starring Steve Martin, Queen Latifah, Eugene Levy, Jean Smart, Joan Plowright, Missi Pyle 

Release Date March 7th, 2003 

Published March 6th, 2003 

Racial humor these days is more difficult than peace in the Middle East. Sensitivities are high and watchdogs are everywhere seizing on any hint of political incorrectness. Into this climate wanders the mismatched buddy comedy Bringing Down The House starring Steve Martin and Queen Latifah. A film that is desperate to be edgy with it's racial humor but paints too broadly to make anything close to a point.

Martin is Peter Sanderson, a workaholic LA lawyer who has recently divorced his wife Kate (Jean Smart) leaving her custody of their two kids, Sarah (Kimberly J. Brown) and Georgy (Angus T. Jones).

Peter isn't an absentee father, he still sees his kids but because of his job, he breaks a lot of promises. Constantly attached to his cellphone, Peter has little time for anything other than work though he has found time to strike up an Internet connection with a fellow lawyer named Charlene. Or so he thinks. Peter believes Charlene is a lawyer because her screen-name is lawyergirl. 

In reality however, Charlene is actually an ex con looking for someone to help get her out of jail. What Peter also doesn't know, until they meet on a blind date at his home, is that Charlene isn't the petite waspish blonde he had imagined but rather a sassy busty black woman in the form of Queen Latifah. If this sounds like the setup to a bad sitcom then you're onto something.

Peter is, not surprisingly, unhappy with Charlene's deception and wants her to leave immediately, until Charlene makes a scene and he is forced to let her stay. In a series of implausibility's, she stays in his house bonds with his kids and eventually the two come to an understanding. She helps him try and get his wife back while he works to clear her name. Eugene Levy is thrown into the plot as Charlene's love interest and The Practice's Steven Harris slums as Charlene's gangbanger ex-boyfriend.

Despite it's bad sitcom level plotting Bringing Down the House has it's share of laughs, most of them coming from Martin and Latifah who at times seem to be in an entirely different and far funnier film. The chemistry between the two is excellent in scenes where they seem to be flying off the script. However, when they are in the forced confines of the film’s plot, they seem bored.

The supporting cast is made up of caricatures and plot points and Eugene Levy is both. Thrown in to give the script a reason for Latifah and Martin not to get together, he also provides the screenwriter with the lame white guy he needs to foolishly send up stereotypical black speech as you have seen in the film‘s inescapable ad campaign. Also forced into the film as a caricature is Joan Plowright as Martin's bigoted client. Plowright's character exists for the purpose of one scene in which she smokes marijuana at a nightclub. It's funny because she's white, old, and smoking a joint..... hahahahaha.

The films racial humor is clumsy to the point of offensive and if it weren't for Latifah, you might not be able to tolerate a lot of it. The script seems determined to either make you laugh or make you extremely uncomfortable, which could be a commendable trait if the film weren't tied to such a mundane plot and bound to it's genre.

Director Adam Shankman needs to learn to control his camera. Early in the film he falls in love with these nauseating tracking shots that will have you wishing for Dramamine. His technique gets better as the film goes on but sadly, he is in place merely to transfer the mundane script to the screen.

Anything interesting in Bringing Down The House is provided by Martin and Latifah who through comedic force of will make this lame predictable material occasionally funny. The most surprisingly funny moment comes toward the end when Martin dresses up in the stereotypical “young black guy” costume and enters a black club. The scene has the potential to be extremely unfunny but Martin plays it so well you laugh, whether you wanted to or not. 

Movie Review: Cradle 2 the Grave

Cradle 2 the Grave (2003) 

Directed by Andrzej Bartkowiak 

Written by John O'Brien 

Starring DMX, Jet Li, Anthony Anderson, Kelly Hu, Tom Arnold, Marc Dacascos, Gabrielle Union 

Release Date February 28th, 2003 

Published February 27th, 2003 

DMX has made it clear with the opening of his production company that the movie business isn't a hobby or a bandwagon-jumping fad. DMX the actor is dead serious about making a go of it in Hollywood. Unfortunately for DMX, Hollywood is not yet taking him seriously, sticking him with bad B-movie action scripts like the one he's saddled with in Cradle 2 the Grave, which, much like his last film Exit Wounds, casts him as the anti-hero with a heart of gold. It is a tiresome formula from which he will have a hard time.

In Cradle 2 the Grave, DMX is a diamond thief named Tony Fait who, along with his crew (including Anthony Anderson and Gabrielle Union) knock over a huge diamond vault in broad daylight. Unfortunately, they are being watched and followed by a shady Taiwanese law enforcement agent named Su (Jet Li). Just when it seems that the crew has pulled a successful heist, Su sends in the cops and Tony and company escape with only a fraction of their loot.

What they did get away with is a very valuable and mysterious bag of black diamonds. Having never seen anything like them before, Fait takes the diamond to a expert fence played by comedian Tom Arnold. Before the fence can find anything out about the diamonds, they are stolen by a rival gang headed up by Boston Public's Chi McBride. It gets worse. The original owners of the black diamonds, headed up by straight-to-video legend Mark Dacascos, want their diamonds back and take Fait's eight-year-old daughter in order to get Fait to give them what they want. (The child in danger plot is the hallmark of hack screenwriting.) Now, with nowhere to turn, Fait must team with Su to get his daughter and the diamonds, which are actually a powerful new terrorist weapon created by the Taiwanese government.

Director Adrzej Bartkowiak, who also helmed Exit Wounds, gives Cradle 2 the Gravea strong music video slickness that work well during the fight scenes, which are choreographed to the film's strong point, its soundtrack. If only the film were as entertaining as it is music. Unfortunately, it's not.

Still struggling with English, Li is given little to do when he isn't fighting bad guys. This puts the dramatic onus on DMX, who has a strong presence but is still a little too raw to be a leading man. The supporting cast is not bad; Union gives an especially strong accounting of herself showing off some kick-ass moves that she's never shown before. Anderson manages to keep his most annoying traits in check, though he is still somewhat grating, especially in the obviously improvised moments.

Poor Mark Dacascos is laughable as the villain. With his vapidity oozing over every sentence, Dacascos is one of least intimidating baddies in a long time. This guy is supposed to be a criminal mastermind; I doubt this guy could mastermind a convenience store robbery let alone negotiate an international arms deal. He, of course, is stuck with the film's most unintentionally chuckle-inducing moments when he addresses the world's foremost arms dealers by saying, "You are the world's most foremost arms dealers." Thanks for the plot update, genius.

Cradle 2 the Grave is yet another chase-scene, explosion, special-effect, action movie on auto-pilot. A film that had a cast and a poster before it had a script, Cradle 2 the Grave is a marketer's dream and an intelligent moviegoer's nightmare.

Movie Review: Dark Blue

Dark Blue (2003) 

Directed by Ron Shelton

Written by David Ayer

Starring Kurt Russell, Ving Rhames, Scott Speedman, Michael Michele, Brendan Gleeson 

Release Date February 21st, 2003

Published February 20th, 2003

The corrupt cop movie has become a genre all it's own and a surprisingly compelling one. Two of the genres most recent entries are Joe Carnahan's Narc and Antoine Fuqua's Training Day, two well-acted and well-written films. However, the genre is also a convenient backdrop for straight to video exploitation films starring Baldwin brothers. So to which extreme does the Kurt Russell-Ron Shelton teaming Dark Blue lean? Sadly a little bit of both.

Set in Los Angeles in 1992, one year after the Rodney King beating and just four days before the acquittal of the four officers involved in the beating, Dark Blue stars Russell as LAPD detective Elden Perry. A member of LA's feared S.I.S unit, Perry and his young partner Bobby Keogh (Felicity's Scott Speedman) have a “play by their own rules” style that flies in the face of legality but does get things done.

As we join the story, Keough is in front of an investigative board to determine whether his use of deadly force in a recent bust was justified. The investigators seem to be willing to accept that the shooting was justified, all of them accept Deputy Chief Arthur Holland (Ving Rhames) who has been suspicious of S.I.S tactics for a very long time. As we soon find out the shooting wasn't clean and Keough wasn't the one who actually pulled the trigger. Indeed, it's questionable whether the guy they shot was even the right criminal.

The S.I.S is headed up by a corrupt lifetime cop Jack Van Meter (Brenden Gleeson), who served with Elden's father and taught Perry the tactics of planting evidence and closing cases regardless of the evidence.

The ambitious Arthur Holland sees the S.I.S for the criminals they are but also as an opportunity. Take down the S.I.S, clean up the department’s most corrupt cops and make a run at becoming LA's first black police chief. With the help of his assistant, SGT. Beth Williamson (Michael Michele), Holland begins an investigation into the S.I.S and Williamson discovers that the cop she has been dating anonymously is Bobby Keough.

The odd thing about Dark Blue is how little screentime Ving Rhames actually has. The films ad campaign plays up the rivalry between Rhames' and Russell's characters. However, most of that war is off screen and what we see more often is the interaction between Russell and Scott Speedman as they investigate a crime they have been instructed not to solve.

The film is based on a story by James Ellroy, best known for LA Confidential. Dark Blue was actually written with the Watts riots of the 1960's as the backdrop. The time shift from then to the 90's and the LA riots touched off by the Rodney King verdict doesn't hurt the story. In addition, the 1992 riots are a good touchstone for modern audiences who still haven't forgotten the riots themselves even if not much was learned from their brutality.

A lot has been made of Russell's performance, which some have said is the best of his career. I disagree. I found Russell's performance to be mostly on the surface. He is the anti-hero, at first he is a bad guy because he plants evidence and believes that cops who beat Rodney King were right to have done it. But he is also conflicted about his work and drinks heavily to cover his emotions. Whether he gets the right bad guy or not, he always busts criminals. Still, Russell never seems to believe the things he says or does. I'm sure the character is supposed to believe them but Russell's laid-back line delivery betrays that.

As for Scott Speedman, there is a reason why his character has little face-time in the film’s marketing. It’s because in every scene he communicates how over-matched he is by the material. Russell and Michael Michele do what they can to carry Speedman but his performance never comes together. Ving Rhames,  meanwhile, really gets abused in Dark Blue. He gets star billing and little screen time. The screen time he does get is mostly silent brooding and pious speechifying. This amazing powerful actor deserves far better than this underused and underwritten character.

Dark Blue isn't a bad film and indeed once it begins dramatizing the beginning of the LA riots, it takes on a visceral excitement that puts the film’s many problems in the background if only momentarily. It's only moments later that we get to Russell's big scene where he gives a rather long-winded speech as the city burns to the ground.

Director Ron Shelton is a technician who knows how to frame the film’s action. Problem is, the script spends too much time painting its characters motivations and not enough time dealing with it's politics about race and corruption in the LAPD. That is the story the film wants to tell but disregards in favor of a more action-centered plot involving a pair of criminals bankrolled by Gleeson's corrupt cop.

There is a film to be made about the racial politics of the LAPD leading from the Rodney King case to the LA riots but Dark Blue is not that film.

Movie Review Shanghai Knights

Shanghai Knights (2003) 

Directed by David Dobkin 

Written by Alfred Gough, Miles Milar 

Starring Jackie Chan, Owen Wilson, Fann Wong, Donnie Yen, Aidan Gillen 

Release Date February 7th, 2003 

Published February 7th, 2003 

I was not a fan of Shanghai Noon, the first teaming of Jackie Chan and Owen Wilson. That film was a dull amalgam of Western cliches and Chan's usual kung-fu histrionics leavened slightly by Wilson's surfer dude charm. So I must admit I wasn't looking forward to the sequel, Shanghai Knights, which transplants the Western duo from Nevada to Britain.

It's 1887 and Britain and China are attempting to avoid a war. The peace process is not helped however by the theft of China's Great Seal, which is the symbol of power in China. The man charged with the protection of the seal is killed and he happens to be the father of Chon Wang (Chan). The seal was stolen by a British aristocrat who was supposed to be heading the peace process. The bad guy is tracked to Britain by Lin Wang, Chon's sister (smokin hot Fan Wong).

After receiving word from his sister, Chon leaves his post as a Nevada Sheriff for New York City so that he can hook up with his old friend Roy O'Bannon (Wilson) to retrieve his portion of the treasure they collected in the first film. Not surprisingly, Roy has blown through the entire treasure printing a book about their first adventure that paints himself as the hero. With debtors and cops chasing him, Roy joins Chon on his trip to Britain.

Once in Britain our heroes join up with a Scotland Yard detective, whose full name is one of the film's many strained-in jokes, to find Chon's sister and track the man who stole the Great Seal. Standing in their way is not only the British villain Rathbone, but a Chinese villain Wu Yip, played by Donnie Yen. Another complication is Roy's attraction to Chon's sister, which Chon attempts to discourage but will no doubt be forced to accept.

The film of course features Chan's typical kung-fu stuff, but it seems fresher than usual here with a slightly more rehearsed feel that makes it more fluid and witty. There is a terrific sequence that takes place with Chan and some police officers in a revolving door that combines Keystone cops, Charlie Chaplin and Bruce Lee. Another sensational sequence honors silent screen superstar Harold Lloyd as Chan and Wilson hang precariously from a clock face.

Why does Shanghai Knights succeed where the first film failed? I'd say the change in location helped but also the chemistry between Wilson and Chan is the biggest improvement. In their first teaming, the two never seemed to be on the same page, with Wilson's laid back charm exposing Chan's weakness with the language. The stunts in Shanghai Knights seem fresher and better choreographed than most of Chan's recent work, especially in the dreadful Tuxedo.

Director David Dobkin infuses the film with a stronger wit and more consistent pace than the first film's helmer, who too often relied on Chan's fighting skills and forgot to make the film funny. Shanghai Knights has those typical buddy movie moments and can't help getting caught up in genre cliche but its wit and energy carries it over the rough spot and makes for an entertaining little fluff piece. A great popcorn film.

Movie Review How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days

How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days (2003) 

Directed by Donald Petrie 

Written by Kristen Buckley, Brian Regan, Burr Steers 

Starring Kate Hudson, Matthew McConaughey, Adam Goldberg, Michael Michele, Shalom Harlow 

Release Date February 7th, 2003 

Published February 6th, 2003 

In Almost Famous, Kate Hudson blew away audiences and critics with her beauty and talent. She had a charisma that melted the hearts of the audience and she and Billy Crudup had chemistry that melted the screen. Since that 1999 film, however, Hudson has struggled to recapture that star quality. Her latest attempt, the romantic comedy, How To Lose A Guy in 10 Days, is a step in the right direction, though she could have used a little better direction from director Donald Petrie.

Hudson is an advice columnist for a women's magazine, writing in-depth articles about how to get a date and how to shop for clothes. However, she longs to write about important things like politics and religion. When a friend loses another boyfriend, Andie gets the idea to write a column about all the things women do to screw up a relationship, an article that shares the title of the film. She and her friends descend upon a Manhattan bar to find the man who will provide the basis for her research.

At the bar is an advertising exec. Ben Barry, trying to save an account that his boss wants to give to another co-worker. The account is with a major diamond company, which his boss (Robert Klein) believes could be better served by two female execs (Michael Michele and Shalom Harlow). So Ben cuts a deal if he can prove he understands women he can keep the account. He can prove it by convincing a woman to fall in love with him in less than 10 days. Little does Ben know that his competitors know just the girl to choose, and Ben is introduced to Andie.

At first Andie is her cool sexy self, a package that a man who wasn't working on a bet couldn't resist. Their first date is all mind games with both Andie and Ben trying to gain the upper hand. After the first date hooks him, Andie sets her plan in motion. On the second date, she ruins Ben's time at a Knicks game. From there, she becomes the girlfriend from hell - clingy, and whiny and just generally abominable. Still, Ben is game; he refuses to give up. Not only because his professional life is riding on the relationship, but because there is still a little spark of the Andie he first met inside this frightening package.

The first half of the film is its strongest as these two likable, intelligent characters set the stage for their courtship, laying out the stakes and letting the games begin. On their first date as they jockey for position, I was reminded of a couple lines from an episode of Seinfeld where Elaine is talking about her boyfriend who doesn't play games and Jerry's appalled response "No games? But how do you know who's winning".

As fun as the first half of the film seems, there was something wrong throughout it. Some scenes, like a fight outside of a movie theater or an embarrassing scene where Andie decides to name Ben's penis, play like extended takes where the actors continued ad-libbing while waiting for the director to call cut. Then there is the director's odd choice in some scenes, especially outdoor scenes, to cover the actors in this gauzy haze that reminded me of those lame Lifetime movies. It's the kind of haze Barbara Streisand uses to make herself look younger on camera. Why director Donald Petrie would think a woman as beautiful as Kate Hudson would need the help of this Vaseline lens is beyond me.

The film's biggest problem though is its inevitability. Falling into that same romantic comedy trap, the film throws up obstacles that are easy to overcome except that if they were overcome intelligently there wouldn't be a film. If Andie and Ben would be honest with each other after it was obvious that the relationship had grown past what they had intended, we wouldn't have to put up with the big reveal scene that you get in every romantic comedy. The scene that calls for each character to accidentally learn about the other's deception and get hurt and run away from each other only to get over it in the next scene, then cry, then kiss and live happily ever after. Been there and done that.

Director Donald Petrie is a master of this crowd pleasing, easily digestible, claptrap. His resume includes Miss Congeniality, My Favorite Martian and Grumpy Old Men. He is a pro director who knows how to point the camera but needs to pick scripts that are more entertaining. Too often Petrie's films skate on the charm of his actors. Though he is blessed with a pair of wonderfully charismatic actors in McConaughey and Hudson, he gives his actors so little to do that they at times look a little lost and forced to fend for themselves.

Movie Review: Deliver Us from Eva

Deliver Us from Eva (2003) 

Directed by Gary Hardwick 

Written by James Iver Mattson

Starring Essence Atkins, Robinne Lee, Meagan Goode, L.L Cool J, Duane Martin

Release Date February 7th, 2003 

Published February 6th, 2003 

The Dandridge sisters hit the genetic lottery; four unbelievably beautiful girls in just one family. Unfortunately, their parents passed away when they were young, leaving the oldest sister Eva (Gabrielle Union) to take care of her younger sisters Kareena (Essence Adkins), Bethany (Robinne Lee) and Jaqui (Meagan Goode).

Eva has spent so much time taking care of her sisters that she has never made much time for a personal life, and now that the sisters are older, she spends her time meddling in their personal lives. Both Kareena and Bethany are married--Kareena to Darrell, a businessman who would like to have a baby; however, Eva tells her sister that she doesn't think they are ready. Bethany is married to Tim, a postal worker who can't get any love because Bethany spends all her time studying at the behest of Eva. Meanwhile, Jaqui is dating a cop named Mike who would like nothing more than to spend the night after they make love but Eva says that good girls don't live with a man before they get married. (But apparently it's okay to sleep with him?)

With Eva in the way, the guys hatch a plan to get her off their backs. The plan involves a friend of Mike's who he claims is the ultimate player. LL Cool J is Ray who, for a fee of five grand, agrees to seduce Eva and convince her to leave town with him, then dump her and leave her wherever they leave to. It's a stupid plan of course with flaws that are quite evident to an intelligent moviegoer, but these guys aren't rocket scientists. So the guys introduce Ray and Eva and the two connect quickly.

Their first date is like a nightmare episode of the show Blind Date. Dinner at a fancy restaurant goes badly after Eva's job as a health inspector lands her in an uncomfortable situation with the restaurant manager.

After that horrible first date, Ray is ready to give up and give the guys their money back. Of course, if he did that there wouldn't be a movie. Of course, fate intervenes and Ray and Eva get another chance. Their next date goes very well and the relationship moves quickly but, because Eva likes Ray and Ray likes Eva the boys plans for getting rid of Eva go wrong. You see, before she met Ray, Eva was going to accept a job in another city, but now that she is with Ray she isn't going anywhere.

Well, as in most romantic comedies, it doesn't take much thought to figure this one out, though director Gary Hardwick does do some unusual and unexpected things. Unfortunately, what he does is so outlandish and over the top and the resolution of this over-the-top twist is so unsatisfying that it undermines the little the film has going for it.

What Deliver Us From Eva has going for it is a fiery romance between Union and Cool J that melts the screen. Their post-coital cuddle conversation is smart, fresh, and sweet and their attraction and chemistry is off the charts. Unfortunately, the supporting players and story is a letdown. The boys played by Duane Martin, Mel Jackson, and Dartanyan Williams are interchangeable parts that leave little impression. As for the younger sisters Meagan Goode, who was so hot in Biker Boyz, is again so very hot in this film though she has little time to make an impression. The same goes for Atkins and Lee who look great but are unmemorable.

Deliver Us From Eva is yet another formula romantic comedy. By the numbers, with a slight charm, it relies too heavily on its lead actors to make a bad script interesting, something very few actors can do and a challenge that is too overwhelming for even actors as talented as Union and LL.

Movie Review: Final Destination 2

Final Destination 2 (2003) 

Directed by David R. Ellis 

Written by J. Mackye Gruber, Eric Bress

Starring Ali Later, A.J Cook, Tony Todd

Release Date January 31st, 2003 

Published January 30th, 2003 

The first Final Destination was your average teen slasher movie spiced up with some surprisingly un-PC gore, and made palatable by a pair of former X-Files producers (James Wong and Rob Morgan.) And do not forget its cast of Hollywood's hottest up-and-coming actors including Devon Sawa, Ali Larter and Seann William Scott. At a time when horror movies were shying away from classic gore Final Destination reveled in beheadings, electrocutions, and fiery, graphically-depicted explosions. Bubbling underneath the gore was a surprising amount of suspenseful setups that were as thrilling as the deaths were disgusting.

As surprisingly entertaining as the first Final Destination was the odds were stacked against the sequel. The fact that it is a sequel tells you that. Add to that the fact that the sequel was without the originals star, Sawa, and it's creative team, Wong and Morgan, and the pieces are in place for a disaster. Yet despite those losses Final Destination 2 manages to be almost as good as the original thanks to the same spirited non PC approach to blood and guts gore.

As we join the story, a teenage girl is lying in bed listening to a man on television discuss the tragedy of flight 180, the plane explosion that precipitated the original film's series of disasters. As the unknown expert relates the story of how none of the kids or teachers who miraculously avoided the plane explosion were still alive, a skeptical news anchor asks just what the expert is getting at and the expert explains that there is no chance or luck, there is only fate, or rather, death's design. The teenager named Kimberly pays little attention to the guy on TV as she and some friends are about to hit the road for spring break in Florida.

Once on the road, Kimberly begins to have strange visions of the people in the cars passing her on the highway. The visions lead to a fiery multiple car crash after a tree breaks a chain and falls off a truck flying through the windshield of a police car killing the cop. The cop car flips leading to a series of accidents that also kills Kimberly and her friends.

Kimberly then awakens suddenly; it was all a dream and she is still stopped at the on ramp that would lead her to the spot where the accident took place in her dream. She sees all the signs again, the same song on the radio the same cars in line behind her that would be involved in the accident. Kimberly decides to stop in the middle of the off ramp and prevent herself and everyone else from getting on the highway and thus saves their lives when the accident happens moments later. Unfortunately for Kimberly, after the same cop from her vision asks her step out of her car and explain why she was stopped on the off ramp, another truck that was involved in her vision plows through her car and kills her three friends. It's a car crash right out of a Faces of Death video.

From there, it's the same plot as the original. Since the people Kimberly held up on the on ramp would have died in the accident, death must now come back and collect them. In a series of increasingly gruesome deaths--impalings, beheadings, and a graphic crushing--nameless actors are offed to the disgusted delight of the audience.

Ali Larter is the only cast member from the original film to return for the sequel. Thought to be dead, her character, Clear Rivers had checked herself into a mental hospital in order to escape death. In the films most disappointing moment Clear explains what happened to Devon Sawa's Alex from the original film. Alex was thought to have survived the original but because they couldn't bring Sawa back for the sequel they invented a backstory explaining his characters demise that is highly unsatisfying. Also unsatisfying is Clear's fate, but I will leave the mystery for those of you who go see this film.

The good thing about Final Destination 2 is how faithful it is to the original. In fact, it is basically a retread of the original, only more disgusting; and that is what I liked about it. In an era where gory disgusting death is seen as being in bad taste, this film revels in bad taste. It's disgusting and bloody and graphic and if you don't have a strong stomach you will want to avoid it. The film's special effects and makeup go for the gusto with as much realism as possible (without actually killing anyone.) When a character is crushed under a giant piece of window glass, the blood spatter is enough to make the most hardened horror fan hold his stomach. When you see a film in which more than one character is impaled through the skull, you know you're not watching your average dull horror film.

Gruesome and disgusting Final Destination 2 sets out to horrify you with its gore and succeeds in eliciting shocked gasps and screams. Its over-the-top horror is outright comical and very fun to watch. It is a rare film in this day and age that ignores the cries of liberal politicians and goes balls out to disgust you, standards of good taste be damned. Final Destination 2 is that rare unapologetically twisted horror movie. 

Movie Review: Biker Boyz

Biker Boyz (2003) 

Directed by Reggie Rock Blythewood

Written by Reggie Rock Blythewood 

Starring Derek Luke, Laurence Fishburne, Orlando Jones, Djimon Hounsou, Lisa Bonet, Brenden Fehr

Release Date January 31st, 2003

Published January 31st, 2003 

How many actors have been hailed as the next big thing? Hundreds maybe thousands. How many of them turn out to be for real? Two, maybe three. Derek Luke, coming off his successful debut in Antwone Fisher, is getting that buzz right now. Does he deserve it? Maybe. But what is certain about Luke is that even if the buzz about his star potential wears off he can fall back on his acting, which is unquestionably strong. His first big budget rollout, the motorcycle racing picture Biker Boyz, isn't nearly as good as it's star but is greatly improved by his acting presence.

Luke stars as Kid, the son of a mechanic (Eric LaSalle in a minor cameo) who is a member of California's most successful bike-racing gang, The Black Knights. Kid's dad is the head mechanic for the King of Cali, Smoke played by Larry Fishburne. The title King of Cali signifies that Smoke is the top motorcycle racer in all of California. Kid is an apprentice member of the Knights until one fateful night when Smoke is challenged by a racer named Chu Chu (Terrence Howard) and during the race an accident kills Kid's dad.

Kid drops out of the Black Knight's but doesn't give up riding bikes. A few months after his father's death Kid is back on the underground-racing scene running a scam with a buddy named Stuntman (Brendon Fehr). The scam is that Stuntman pretends to be drunk and Kid, using his previous connections in the underground, tricks someone into believing the drunk guy has challenged him. However, after Kid is spotted with Stuntman, he is called in front of the leaders of the underground racing gangs who inform that if he is caught running a scam in their midst he will be killed. Only Smoke keeps them from killing him right then. 

Kid and Stuntman decide they are going legit and want to challenge Smoke for the King of Cali crown but to do that they must start their own gang and thus the Biker Boyz are born. Kid's riding attracts a large group of followers including a smoking hot tattoo artist named Tina (Meagan Good).  All of this is leading to a race between Kid and Smoke, but not before the film turns in a melodramatic twist that tests the audiences patience and the script's believability. The melodrama is on par with the lamest soap opera at a point in the film where the audience just wants to see the cool bikes and the racing.

Director Reggie Rock Blythewood too often let's Biker Boyz meander into the dramatic subplots involving Kid's mother (Vanessa Bell Calloway) as well as Smoke and Kid's father, when he should be taking advantage of the exciting race sequences.

Unfortunately, the racing sequences aren't even that exciting. Kid's first race has a great moment where Kid stands up on the bike and crosses the finish line first after entering the race well after it started. However, there just isn't enough racing. There are plenty of shots of motorcycles and shots of the gangs riding there bikes in formation down city streets. Still, none of these scenes evokes the energy that made the Fast & the Furious a fun and exciting ride.

One of the films biggest mistakes is it's soundtrack, which employs slow silky R & B tunes that suck the energy out of the racing scenes. In the films climactic race scene the filmmakers go with an orchestral score instead of a more appropriate rap or heavy metal tune. The orchestral score is sleep inducing and derivative. It's the same kind of orchestral flourish that accompanies the winning moment of a sports movie.

The films cast is populated by numerous recognizable faces in small roles including Orlando Jones, Lisa Bonet, Tyson Beckford, Lorenz Tate, Djimon Hounsou and Kid Rock. At times, there are so many recognizable faces it's like a Hells Angel's version of the Love Boat.  Larry Fishburne is beginning to show his age, looking paunchy and tired throughout most of the film. Let's hope he gets his energy and intensity back for the Matrix sequels later this year. 

No such problem for Derek Luke who brings the film an energy it desperately needs. His chemistry with love interest Meagan Good is strong and sexual. Luke is Biker Boyz's one great asset and I don't want to imagine what the film would have been like without him. Biker Boyz has been compared with The Fast & the Furious but the comparison isn't favorable. Fast & the Furious was big, dumb and loud but it had this energetic quality, a sort of kitschy machismo that made it funny and exciting. Furious used it's implausibilities to make the film funny in a stupid unintended way. 

Biker Boyz on the other hand is quiet in comparison. It wants to be taken seriously as a drama rather than capitalize on the hyper kinetic racing scenes and MTV-style editing that made Furious so much fun. Biker Boyz needs less melodrama and more adrenaline. Pump up the soundtrack and drop the subplots. Hire one of those X-Games directors and let racing be the film's focus and maybe Biker Boyz could work.  As it is though it's a dull film that provides a good vehicle for Derek Luke to show off his talent. Still, it isn't as good as it could have been. 

Movie Review: Ant-Man and The Wasp

Ant-Man and the Wasp (2018) 

Directed by Peyton Reed 

Written by Chris McKenna, Erik Sommers, Paul Rudd

Starring Paul Rudd, Evangeline Lilly, Walton Goggins, Michael Douglas, Michelle Pfeiffer, Judy Greer 

Release Date July 6th, 2018

Published July 5th, 2018 

Ant-Man and the Wasp is an absolute blast. The latest movie to shine in the Marvel Universe, this fast-paced, funny action flick more than lives up the superhero hype with a pair of delightful lead performances from Paul Rudd and Evangeline Lilly, as the titular duo, and an exceptional colorful supporting cast including Michael Douglas, Michelle Pfeiffer and Michael Pena.

Ant-Man and The Wasp picks up the story of Scott Lang (Rudd) 2 years after the events of Captain America Civil War wherein Scott, as Ant-Man, took sides with Captain America (Chris Evans) and in doing so violated the Sokovia Accords. This led to a year in jail and another year in house arrest where, at the very least, he gets to spend time with his daughter when he isn’t learning sleight of hand magic or playing drums, in a video game.

The story really kicks in when Hope Van Dyne (Lilly) and her father, Hank Pym (Michael Douglas), open a portal to the Quantum Realm where Scott was nearly lost forever in the last film and where Hope’s mother, Hank’s wife, Janet (Michelle Pfeiffer) has been lost for decades. Opening the Quantum Realm reveals that Janet has created a way, via Scott, for her to communicate and perhaps escape her decades long exile.

Meanwhile, a baddie calling herself The Ghost (Hannah John-Kamen) is trying to steal Hank’s lab to try and save her life. The less revealed about Ghost the better, the character has a fun secret that is revealed throughout the movie. The Ghost isn’t the only baddie however, as a shady arms dealer, played by Walton Goggins decides that he wants to steal Hank’s technology in order to sell it to the highest bidder.

That’s the set up for a  whole bunch of terrifically funny gags. Ant-Man and The Wasp is so much fun! Director Peyton Reed, much maligned for taking over the first Ant-Man after fan favorite Edgar Wright was dropped from the project, shows growth as a visual artist and in the confidence of a man with a vision. Reed appears to want Ant-Man to be the comic conscience of the Marvel Universe and two features in, he’s lived up to that title.

So how does Ant-Man and The Wasp fit into the narrative of the wider MCU? Well, I am not going to spoil that, you need to see this movie for that fun. I will say that the mid-credits scene is where the ongoing narrative is addressed and that there is no need to stay for the end credits scene which is merely the end of a running gag in Ant-Man and The Wasp and one of the few things in the movie that isn’t particularly funny.

Ant-Man and The Wasp is another triumph for the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It’s a film that combines the best traits of the Marvel Universe from big laughs to big action to genuine drama. Michael Douglas adds genuine gravitas to Ant-Man and The Wasp and when he and Michelle Pfeiffer finally share the screen the scene is legitimately moving thanks to the wide-ranging talents of both actors and this super smart, funny script.

Ant-Man and The Wasp is one of my favorite movies of 2018.

Movie Review Spiderman Far From Home

Spider-Man Far from Home (2019) 

Directed by Jon Watts 

Written by Chris McKenna, Erik Sommers

Starring Tom Holland, Zendaya, Jake Gyllenhaal, Cobie Smulders, Samuel L Jackson, Marisa Tomei 

Release Date July 2nd, 2019 

Published July 1st, 2019 

Spider-Man Far From Home is a delight. This is just the kind of palette cleansing crowd-pleaser that the Marvel Cinematic Universe needed in the aftermath of Avengers Endgame. Far From Home is filled with fun and excitement and a renewed sense of wonder in a world jaded by so many superhero adventures. As much as I appreciate the weightiness of Endgame, it’s just nice to relax into a superhero movie without the oppressive number of heroes and world saving excesses. 

Spider-Man Far from Home picks up the story of Peter Parker/Spider-Man in the wake of The Snap and the miraculous return of those who had been snapped out of existence. Peter is back in school but 5 years have passed for him and most of his classmates as well who also suffered The Snap. No rest for the weary however as the school is sending Peter and his class to Europe to study for the summer. 

In a step toward renewed normalcy, Peter is back to pining for MJ (Zendaya) and he hopes that the trip to Europe will provide him the chance to tell her how he feels. Peter has an elaborate romantic plan in mind involving a gift he obtains for MJ in Italy that he plans on giving to her in Paris when the class visits the Eiffel Tower. Naturally, it won’t be that easy. Peter first has to overcome his own remarkable awkwardness around MJ. And, Peter has a new challenge from a fellow student who was one of the few not snapped out of existence. Brad (Remy Hii) was a five years younger afterthought before The Snap, and now Brad is a buff, handsome rival for MJ’s affections. 

Oh, and there is one more obstacle in Peter’s way. Nick Fury (Samuel L Jackson) has been trying to get in touch with Peter since before he left for Europe and he’s not a man who copes well with being ghosted. Fury is crashing Peter’s vacation from Spider-Man because he is tracking a global threat. Monsters called the Elementals are coming to Earth from some other dimension and with the Avengers in tatters, Fury needs Spider-Man to step up. 

There is one other hero on hand however and fans are calling him Mysterio (Jake Gyllenhaal). Mysterio’s real name is Quentin Beck and according to him, he comes from an alternate Earth where the Elementals rose up and destroyed the entire planet, including Beck’s wife. Beck narrowly escaped and now seeks revenge and hopes to keep the Elementals from destroying yet another multidimensional Earth. 

That Quentin Beck has ulterior motives is perhaps the worst kept secret in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Whether you are a comic book fan who knows where the character of Mysterio is headed or you are just someone with a keen eye for Roger Ebert’s theory of the Economy of Characters, it’s inevitable that we will arrive at a point where Mysterio and Spider-Man will be at odds. The key then becomes, how does the movie get there. 

If you were to pull threads on the plot of Spider-Man Far from Home you might unravel this premise in a less than satisfying fashion. I won’t go into spoilers but I will warn you against asking yourself why character A is performing action B when he knows that the outcome is C. The plot mechanics here are faulty at best and lazy at worst. And that is coming from someone who is writing a positive review of Spider-Man Far from Home. 

So, why do I recommend a movie that even I must admit is deeply flawed? First and foremost, I am a Spider-Man fan. Spider-Man is perhaps my favorite superhero dating back to the mindblowing Spiderman 2 with Tobey Maguire, a movie I feel is a legit masterwork of the superhero genre. I am also becoming a huge fan of Tom Holland who has a winning charisma and awkward charm that I find incredibly entertaining. Holland appears to have been born to play Spider-Man. 

I adore this cast and their wonderful comic chemistry. The teenagers in Far from Home are a super fun group with Zendaya bringing wit to MJ that has lacked in previous versions of this character and Jacob Batalon as Ned doing terrific work as Spider-Man’s wacky sidekick. Further down the cast list are the inspired duo of Martin Starr and J.B Smoove who play the teacher chaperones on the school trip. Too much of these characters would be irksome but director Jon Watts deploys them just enough in Far From Home. 

The action and effects of Spider-Man Far from Home are spectacular. The big action scenes have a scope and scale to them that splits the difference perfectly from the oppressive armageddon of Endgame and the lightness and adventure that made Tom Holland’s first turn as Spider-Man so much fun. Director Jon Watts pulled off a pretty great trick in closing out the first phase of Marvel movies with something fun that also has some weight to it to kick into the next phase. 

That weight comes from the stakes raised in the mid-credits scene of Far From Home. No spoilers but there is a big cameo here and he has some Earth shaking news for Peter Parker that throws his MCU arc for a loop. It’s an exceptionally smart choice for a cameo and a really effective set up for the next adventures in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. As many problems as I have with the narrative clumsiness of Far From Home, they absolutely nailed this mid-credit moment. 

Spider-Man Far From Home overcomes some serious plot issues by being so much fun that I did not care about the problems. Jake Gyllenhaal chews the scenery as Quentin Beck is Gyllenhaal at his most lively and exciting. His character is weird and offbeat but it works for Spider-Man. The chemistry between Gyllenhaal and Tom Holland is really enjoyable, they have a natural rapport that makes the issues of the movie so much less important. 

Don’t think too much about it and you will find Spider-Man Far from Home as entertaining as I did. 

Movie Review Punisher Warzone

Punisher Warzone (2008) 

Directed by Lexi Alexander

Written by Nick Santora, Art Marcum, Matt Holloway 

Starring Ray Stevenson, Dominic West, Julie Benz, Dash Mihok, Wayne Knight 

Release Date December 5th, 2008 

Published December 5th, 2008 

That sound you have been hearing for weeks as commercials aired for Punisher Warzone with the collective America all screaming "WHO" when the name Ray Stevenson was touted. Who the hell is Ray Stevenson? He was one of the stars of HBO's well respected series Rome.

Of course, that show never averaged more than 2 million viewers per airing in its two seasons and only 200,000 of those viewers are likely to be able to recognize good ol' Ray as Titus Pullo. So why does Lionsgate tout Ray Stevenson? Who knows.

They would have been much better off touting the film's extraordinary violence. Punisher Warzone cuts more throats, explodes more heads and spills more fake blood than any three of the Saw films combined. The perverse level of violence and the director's lingering camera as said violence commences reaches an almost entertaining level of kitsch.

Almost.

Ray Stevenson (Yes, that Ray Stevenson) stars as Frank Castle, an ex-special forces soldier whose family was killed in cold blood. Now he spends his days hunting the wicked and has set his sights on the local mob. Led by the sadistic Billy Russoti (Dominic West) this collection of mobsters are some of the most offensive goomba stereotypes in history.

Most of these Italian stereotypes are just cannon fodder for Frank who in the opening scenes swings into action slicing heads, necks and limbs. He is soon swinging upside down from a chandelier shooting a pair of guns that mow down a roomful of gangsters, murdering not just goombas but the laws of physics as well.

It comes down, of course, to a battle between Frank Castle and Russotti who by the end has been renamed Jigsaw, an affront to the exceptional baddie from the Saw movies. There are a couple of cops involved as well, Dash Mihok and Colin Salmon play a pair of the worst cops in movie history.

Director Lexi Alexander shows one thing in Punisher Warzone,  you don't have to be a man to record some seriously hardcore violence. Alexander in fact pushes beyond even her most perverse counterparts, leading one to wonder if her gender played a role in her choice to  include so much violence. If so, what was she trying to prove?

Punisher Warzone is violent in ways so outlandish you almost have to admire it. I don't admire it but I was mildly amused. Unfortunately, director Alexander fails to go for the full on kitsch and the movie bogs down when there isn't blood being spilt. That takes the film from so bad it's good to just plain bad.

Movie Review Iron Man

Iron Man (2008) 

Directed by Jon Favreau 

Written by Mark Fergus, Hawk Ostby, Art Marcum, Matt Holloway

Starring Robert Downey Jr., Gwyneth Paltrow, Terrence Howard, Jeff Bridges, Shaun Toub

Release Date May 2nd, 2008 

Published May 1st, 2008 

Tony Stark has lived a life of glorious privilege since birth. His father was part of the group that invented the A Bomb. That allowed Tony's dad to build a weapons manufacturing empire. By the time Tony Stark became a grown-up, he was a billionaire. He was also an orphan as his parents were killed in an accident some years before this story begins. 

With power, money and women all at his feet things could not be any more perfect for Tony Stark. He was left only for a fall. That fall comes when Tony is captured by Afghan terrorists after demonstrating his latest weapon for the military. The terrorists want Tony to build them his new weapon from the scraps of his weapons that they have somehow purchased.

Tony has other plans. With the help of a fellow captive (Shaun Toub, Crash) Tony builds a new kind of weapon, a giant iron suit that he will use to escape. This prototype suit allows Tony to fight his way out of the clutches of the bad guys and into a well timed rescue by the military, lead by Tony's pal General Rhodes (Terrence Howard).

Returning home, Tony decides to change his ways. While perfecting his iron suit weapon he makes the rash decision to take his company out of the weapons business, against the advice of his father's business partner Obediah Stane (Jeff Bridges). Vowing to protect the people he put in harms way with his weapons of mass destruction, Stark creates Iron Man and goes to war with terrorists and their benefactors.

Directed by Jon Favreau, Iron Man is classic blockbuster, summer movie fare. Larger than life characters, good versus evil, big time action and a sense of humor. Iron Man has it all and in the person of Robert Downey Jr. it has a soul and depth that similar movies (I'm looking at you Fantastic Four) don't have.

Downey is not your prototypical action star and given his history of drug and alcohol abuse, he's the last actor you would imagine as the star of a summer blockbuster. That is however what makes his casting so inspired. Hiring a real actor as opposed to some hunky stand-in (Tom Welling anyone?), gives Iron Man the kind of depth that it would take other actors a lot more work to establish.

Surrounded by an exceptional supporting cast of Oscar nominees, Terrence Howard, Oscar winners, Gwyneth Paltrow as Pepper Potts, and crafty veterans, Jeff 'The Dude' Bridges, Shaun Taub, Downey sparkles and Iron Man transcends the typical summer movie. Iron Man is not without flaws, it takes a while to get to the red and gold suit, the editing of the big fight scene is a little muddled, but overall this is a terrific summer entertainment.

Movie Review Spiderman 3

Spiderman 3 (2007) 

Directed by Sam Raimi 

Written by Ivan Raimi, Alvin Sargent 

Starring Tobey Maguire, James Franco, Kirsten Dunst, Thomas Haden Church, Topher Grace, Bryce Dallas Howard, J.K Simmons 

Release Date May 4th, 2007 

Published May 3rd, 2007 

It was bound to happen. The law of diminishing returns had to kick in at some point. For some film franchises; it happens right away (Matrix Reloaded, anyone?). For some; a good run continues (We’ll see what happens with Shrek and Harry Potter soon). Other film franchises have never gotten off the ground creatively (How did we get a second Fantastic Four and a third Rush Hour?).

But, for one of the great franchises of all time, a great run doesn’t exactly end as much as it ebbs. In Spiderman 3 a great franchise doesn’t jump the shark, to appropriate a TV term, rather it levels off with a first mediocre entry. Failures in logic, underwritten villains and overripe melodrama, can’t sink a great franchise but it does bring an unsatisfying end.

When last we left Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) he had revealed himself as Spiderman to the woman he loves Mary Jane Watson (Kirsten Dunst) and she had run away from her wedding to be with him. Now, Peter is ready to take the relationship to the next level and ask Mary Jane to be his wife.If only things could be that simple.

Unfortunately for Spiderman a trifecta of villains has other plans for the webslinger's future. First there is Peter’s ex-best friend Harry Osbourne (James Franco) who believes Spiderman killed his father and wishes for revenge. Then there is Flint Marko (Thomas Haden Church) a petty thief who stumbles into some kind of science experiment and becomes the Sandman.

Finally, the third villain, for a time, is Peter himself. With New York finally coming to see Spidey as a real hero, things are going to Peter’s head. He is soaking up the love and admiration of the public and is beginning to neglect his relationship with Mary Jane. When a meteor filled with a lively black goo slams into the earth it attaches itself to Peter Parker and its power is transformative.

The problems with Spiderman 3 are going to be obvious and overbearing for some and easily forgivable for others; but they should be obvious to everyone. Director Sam Raimi, in a rush to cram a whole lot of plot into not a lot of space, cuts a few to many logical corners. Coincidence and contrivance takes the place of rational plotting.

Characters make decisions based on what is needed for the scene even if it contradicts previous behavior. More than once a character arrives somewhere because the plot needs them and not for any other logical reason. One character holds on to a piece of information that could have been helpful as far back as Spiderman 2. This previously insignificant character happens to hold this info until just the moment that it is needed in this plot.

Despite the logical leaps and the abuse of coincidence and contrivance, there is still much to enjoy in Spiderman 3. The computer graphics continue to be cutting edge. The action and CGI work together in dazzling effect. The scene in which Flint Marko becomes the Sandman is a visual mind blower as we watch Thomas Haden Church pulled apart atom by atom until there is nothing but sand.

Then; there are the fight scenes which grow bigger with each successive battle. Peter versus Harry, fighting in mid air. Spidey taking on Sandman inside and outside a moving brinks truck and the battle at the end between Spider and the tandem of Sandman and that villainous black goo, which attached itself to a new host, are all terrific scenes and more than enough reason for me to recommend Spiderman 3.

Later this summer Shrek will try to avoid its own jump the shark moment. Meanwhile Pirates of the Caribbean will try and bounce back from a lackluster follow up. Every franchise is different but each will have a low point. If Spiderman 3 is the low point for the Spiderman franchise then we can look forward to more great things from our friendly neighborhood Spiderman the next time he swings into theaters.

Movie Review Spider-Man 2

Spider-Man 2 (2004) 

Directed by Sam Raimi

Written by Alvin Sargent 

Starring Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, Alfred Molina, James Franco, Rosemary Harris 

Release Date June 30th, 2004 

Published June 29th, 2004 

The first Spider-Man was a spectacular adventure that surprised a lot of critics with its depth and terrific characters. Spider-man 2 is likely to surprise even more. Free of expository scripting, this sequel leaps into the fray and delivers something most sequels cannot, a follow up that is more than worthy of its original.

2 years have passed since Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) was bitten by that radioactive spider and Spider-man has continued saving innocent New Yorkers from all sorts of peril. Still, he is not quite the hero you would expect. Spider-man is still consistently vilified by the maniacal newspaperman J. Jonah Jameson (JK Simmons). Worse yet, his Spidey powers are coming and going, often leaving him falling from the sky and in pain.

As for Peter Parker, well, he's getting it worse than his alter ego. It does not pay to be a superhero so Peter is forced to take odd jobs to pay for his tiny one-bed-no-bath apartment. Unfortunately, his web slinging duties tend to make him late for work and thus he gets fired a lot, including from his latest job delivering pizzas. Peter's Aunt May (Rosemary Harris) is close to losing her home and blames herself for the death of her husband Ben. Peter has not told her what really happened.

Peter is also failing his college courses, too often late to class where his professor (Dylan Baker) is ready to fail him unless his paper on the legendary scientist Otto Octavius is good enough to save him. Doctor Octavius (Alfred Molina) just happens to be working for Peter's friend Harry Osbourne (James Franco) at Oscorp where he is developing a dangerous new energy source with the help of four massive metal tentacles that fuse to his spine. You can tell this is going to go bad and it does. Octavius' experiment blows up, killing his wife and leaving the tentacles permanently fused to his back. Worse yet, somehow the tentacles are now in charge and they want to try the experiment again.

Of course that is not Peter Parker's biggest problem. No, his biggest problem is still his unrequited love of Mary Jane Watson (Kirsten Dunst). In the two years since Peter told Mary Jane they could never be together, she has become a successful actress and model. Her face is plastered all over the city, a constant reminder to Peter of what he has given up to be Spider-man. Mary Jane has finally tired of waiting for Peter and has told him she is going to marry Astronaut John Jameson (Daniel Gillies).

That is a minor gloss of this wonderfully dense and well-conceived plot. Director Sam Raimi and writer Alvin Sargent, with an assist by writer Michael Chabon amongst others, have concocted a rare action-adventure film with a life outside of its computer graphics.

Filled with humor, sadness and life, this is a script worthy of attention of awards shows. The middle portion of the film is especially good. Peter Parker gives up being Spider-man and while his grades are up and he may finally be able to be with Mary Jane, crime goes up 75% and even Jonah Jameson wishes Spidey would come back. With Doc Ock on the loose, you know Spidey will be back but this terrific script and cast make this obligatory decision a seamless part of the story and the maturing of Peter Parker.

The script nods endlessly to its comic book source. The scene where Peter tosses his Spidey suit in an alley garbage can is a direct lift from the comic book. Extraneous characters like John Jameson and the doctor who treats Peter after he thinks he's lost his powers, Dr. Curt Connors, are both historic characters from the comic book. Both go on to have serious accidents that lead them to becoming villains in the comic, FYI.

There is also a bit at the end involving James Franco's Harry Osbourne that relates to one of the comics all time best storylines. Fans of the comic who recognize these characters are drooling over which will be the big baddie of Spider-man 3.

What a loss it would have been if rumors prior to the film’s shooting had come true and Tobey Maguire had been dropped as Spider-man. No offense to Jake Gyllenhaal who was rumored to take over for Maguire, but Spider-man is clearly Maguire's role. Maguire has not always been one of my favorite actors. I've always found his earnest nerdiness and dewy eyed look cloying. Somehow, Maguire turns those negatives into positives for both Spider-man and Peter Parker. His nerdy exterior is the perfect cover for the superhero inside, his nervousness and quavering voice as Peter Parker is the essential yin to Spidey's confident superhero yang.

The chemistry between Maguire and Kirsten Dunst is tremendous and the love story is almost as exciting as the CGI fight scenes. Almost. These are some impressive effects, but I digress. There are real fireworks when Peter and Mary Jane are together. The unrequited love story has grown from the puppy dog crush of the first film to a deeper, more mature longing and we feel it every time they are together.

Now back to those effects. Science has not moved far enough yet to make Spider-man or his nemesis Doc Ock look completely seamless, but this is as close as anyone has come other than George Lucas. Doc Ock is a terrific-looking character. At first he seems kind of goofy looking, Alfred Molina is not the first actor you think of when you think of a comic book movie. However, once the character gets into fighting Spider-man it really gets good. The climactic battle on an elevated subway train is one of the most exciting action scenes ever. Ever!

If there is a criticism of Spider-man 2, it’s that there might not be enough of Spider-man himself. As good as Maguire is at being Peter Parker, that is where the film’s depth comes from. I can see where some audience members will be counting the seconds until Peter is back behind the mask. That for me is a minor criticism because whether it's Spider-man or Peter Parker, this movie is a terrific ride filled with emotion, humor and unbeatable action. As Roger Ebert said, this may be the best superhero movie ever made.

Movie Review: X2 X-Men United

X2: X-Men United (2003) 

Directed by Brian Singer

Written by Michael Dougherty, Dan Harris, David Hayter 

Starring Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Ian McKellan, Halle Berry, Famke Janssen, James Marsden

Release Date May 2nd, 2003 

Published May 1st, 2003 

The first of 2003's many blockbusters is here. The sequel to the 2000 cash machine, X Men, X Men United once again has Professor Xavier's clan of mutants attempting to prevent a human-mutant war. The twist however in X2 finds our hero's on the same side as archenemy Magneto against an evil army general with a double secret agenda. The familiar story combines with spectacular effects for an enjoyable popcorn entertainment.

The film opens with a sensational effects scene involving a new mutant called Nightcrawler (Alan Cumming) and an attack on the White House. Using his mutant ability to turn to smoke and float through walls, Nightcrawler evades the secret service and attacks the President. Through luck, the President's life is saved, but now the tentative peace between humans and mutants that started at the end of the first film is over.

Despite the efforts of Mystique (Rebecca Romijn Stamos who is not bad when she's not saddled with too much dialogue) disguised as the late Senator Kelly (Bruce Davison), an army General named Stryker (Brian Cox) convinces the President that a strike against mutants is necessary. His target, Xavier's School for the Gifted, AKA the X-Men compound.

In the meantime, Professor Xavier has begun searching for Nightcrawler to uncover why he attacked the President. Xavier dispatches Storm (Halle Berry) and Jean Grey (Famke Janssen) to find Nightcrawler, while he and Cyclops visit archenemy Magneto (Ian Mckellen) to determine his involvement. Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) returns to the school just in time to take charge of the student while everyone is gone. Of course this is when Stryker and his army attack, forcing Wolverine to empty the school and go on the run.

With Rogue (Anna Paquin), Iceman (Shawn Ashmore) and Pyro (Aaron Stanford), Wolverine heads for safety in the home of Iceman's parents. In one of the films most talked about scenes, Iceman "comes out" to his parents about being a mutant. It's not long though before the cops show and they are on the run again.

Once reunited with Storm and Jean, they find that the Professor and Cyclops are missing and they are being hunted by military jets as they escape in the X jet. After taking a hit the jet nearly crashes, they are saved at the last minute by the unlikely savior, the now free Magneto. With the mutual enemy of General Stryker, they must team with Magneto and Mystique to free Xavier and stop Stryker from launching the war against mutants.

Summer blockbusters aren't about great storytelling, they are about special effects and sly humor and X2 delivers both. Not only is there the awesome White House attack sequence, but also the jet fight with Storm attempting to lose the military jets in a series of tornado's that she creates.

Most of the film’s humor comes, surprisingly from Wolverine in subtle commentary in his surroundings. Thrown in to babysitter mode while the rest of the crew is hunting for Nightcrawler, Wolverine has some fun interaction with the students before the military attacks. Then as witness to Iceman's coming out, Wolverine's annoyance of his conventional surroundings are very funny. Jackman's gruffness is perfectly in tune with his humor.

The effects are strong, but suffer in comparison to the Matrix trailer that precedes it. The Matrix trailer was so good I missed the first couple minutes of X2, still reveling in Reloaded. That is not to say I wasn't impressed by X2 but it is made to look conventional by comparison.

The performances aren't much to be remembered Halle Berry's Storm gets more screen time this second time around but not much insight is made into the character. Jackman as Wolverine gets the most screen time and is undoubtedly the star but the more Wolverine is on the screen the less impressive he becomes. In comparison with Jean and Storm, Wolverine's powers, his adamantium claws and superhuman healing ability seem small. You know when it comes to the major save the world stuff it will be Storm or Jean doing the saving with Wolverine as a spectator.

Director Brian Singer does an efficient job of balancing his large cast and huge effects scenes, and while the story isn't all that impressive it's all very well choreographed and follows a certain logic. To balance all of this big budget stuff and make a film that is semi-coherent is a feat all on it's own. It's an entertaining popcorn film that effectively sets the stage for the next sequel. It's no Spider-Man, Batman or Superman, but it's still pretty good.

Movie Review The Company Men

The Company men (2011) 

Directed by John Wells 

Written by John Wells 

Starring Ben Affleck, Tommy Lee Jones, Chris Cooper, Kevin Costner, Maria Bello, Craig T. Nelson

Release Date January 21st, 2011

Published January 20th, 2011 

John Wells made his nut as the Executive Producer and creator of the hit series ER. For all intents and purposes John Wells never has to work again. Yet, with multi, multi, multi millions of dollars in the bank John Wells is hanging himself out there as a director and making the movie “The Company Men,” a real American Dream movie about a self made man who decides to risk it all for an ideal that has too long ago passed away in the overwhelming light of modern corporate/Wall Street culture.

Tommy Lee Jones is Gene McClary CFO of a company that used to make ships, now they make corporate deals that have next to nothing to do with shipbuilding. In fact, with every new move the company he formed with his best friend (Craig T. Nelson) gets further and further away from their humble beginnings in the stockyards. The people that came up with them are dropping like flies as every move of the stock price is accompanied by more layoffs and firings.

Among those losing their job in the corporate carnage is up and comer Bobby Walker (Ben Affleck). As one of many heads of sales in the shipbuilding division; Bobby looked like a future CEO. Sadly, with shipping dying and his salary near the top he's out and he's not alone. Soon to join Bobby on the unemployment line is Phil Woodward (Chris Cooper) , a veteran salesman and one of Gene's oldest friends. Phil came up from building ships in the yard and now, just short of his retirement age he is out of a job.

Bobby's story comprises much of the runtime of “The Company Men” as he and his wife (Rosemarie Dewitt) cope with a big mortgage, two expensive cars and two frightened kids. Unwilling to swallow his pride Bobby scours the country for a job that will keep his family in their home. When he finally is forced to make a choice his only option is to take a temporary job working for his brother in law (Kevin Costner) working construction.

Phil's story is even darker and has a powerful and devastating conclusion that, though it is predictable, nevertheless impacts strongly. Chris Cooper is extraordinary as a man who fiercely clings to his pride to the point that it devastates him. Phil is the impetus for a hopeful and miraculous finish that I will leave you to discover by watching the wonderful fairy tale that is “The Company Men.”

The values at work in “The Company Men'' are deeply liberal but not in the stereotypical sense. “The Company Men '' exerts the true dream of liberalism, fair treatment for all. While the right accuses the left of simply wanting handouts, “The Company Men '' demonstrates a corporate titan and multi-millionaire who acts in the best interest of his employees and sets about using his money to create opportunities not handouts.

The notion is I am My Brother's Keeper. We are our brother’s keeper and that doesn't mean giving something away, it means that when you succeed you use your success to create an opportunity for others to succeed. I have always used a metaphor to demonstrate how I feel about people with money and people without and it goes like this: once you have climbed the wall to financial stability throw a rope back so that the next person can climb up there with you.

Too many of the rich in America are pulling the rope up behind them, taking their wealth and squirreling it away for reasons that only they understand. “The Company Men” gives life to my dream of a corporate culture where opportunities are created and success is decided by those who grab the opportunity given and make the most of it.

Tommy Lee Jones's Gene is fascinating because he does what so many with money will not do, he throws a rope back. It's not about him giving something away, he decides to create something, build something, innovate something and in the process he gives others the opportunity to create and innovate alongside him.

Thank you John Wells, “The Company Men” is a movie of relevance and necessity. This is the movie that so many other modern polemics wish they could be; a story of hope against the sorrow of our tough economic times. “The Company” Men is a guide post for how our country could get turned around if there were more men of means like Gene willing to take a risk and throw a rope back over the wall.