Movie Review Fantastic Four

Fantastic Four (2015) 

Directed by Josh Trank

Written by Josh Trank, Simon Kinberg, Jeremy Slater

Starring Miles Teller, Michael B. Jordan, Kate Mara, Jamie Bell

Release Date August 7th, 2015 

Fantastic 4 is far from fantastic. (Yes, I know how cheesy that line is) This attempt to reboot the franchise following the disaster that was The Silver Surfer, assembled a terrific cast, a rising young director and arguably Hollywood's hottest screenwriter and somehow managed to make a movie that disappoints every audience, fanboys and casual moviegoers. This is a dull-witted origin story that fails that while successfully explaining the origins of the supposed heroes, waits until the final 10 minutes of the movie to make them heroic.

In many ways I feel bad for the team behind the new Fantastic Four. Director Josh Trank has stepped out and actually trashed the movie as it was being released. Trank claims that this isn't the movie that he made and that the movie he made was pretty good as opposed to the movie that we are getting in theaters this weekend. Trank's version of Fantastic Four is a movie we will never get to see. Indeed, Trank isn't wrong, this isn't a very good movie. That said, I wish there had been a slightly more diplomatic approach. 

It's a shame that this has gone the way it has because this Fantastic Four movie features some of the best actors of young Hollywood. The film stars Miles Teller as Reed Richards, Jamie Bell as his best friend Ben Grimm, Kate Mara as Reed's future wife, Sue Storm and the brilliant Michael B. Jordan as Johnny Storm, Sue's adopted brother. The film follows Reed as he and Ben invent a prototype for a matter transporter. The successful invention leads to them being recruited by Franklin Storm, the father of Johnny and Sue, and the head of a scientific firm. 

What Reed and Ben don't know about their invention is that it is actually a portal to a parallel dimension. When they find out they are disappointed to learn that Franklin intends to send a group of NASA astronauts into this dimension rather than allowing Ben and Reed the chance to go themselves. Being hotshot kids, they recruit Sue and Johnny along with another friend and scientist, named Victor (Toby Kebbell) to join them as they sneak into the lab and make use of their invention. 

The trip goes horribly wrong and results in all five of the young scientists to be mutated. Reed becomes elastic, his body able to stretch to a remarkable degree. Sue becomes invisible, capable of appearing and disappearing at will. Johnny takes on the ability to become fire. He can fly and throw fireballs and it's as cool as it sounds except that he can't yet control his abilities. Poor Ben gets the worst of it all. Ben has been turned to stone. He can still move and breathe, and speak, but he's covered in rock. It does give him superhuman strength but at the expense of his basic humanity. 

The plot then becomes about Reed's guilt over seemingly dooming himself and his closest friends to a life of mutations that they cannot control. After making it back from the other dimension, losing Victor in the process, Reed manages to escape from a military holding facility and runs off to South America. Located a year later, he's taken into custody by Ben who is seemingly Reed's sworn enemy. Sue and Johnny also aid in Reed's capture having had suits developed for them that enable them to control their powers. 

A return to the parallel dimension reveals that Victor not only survived, but he's also built himself a kingdom. His return to this dimension finds him looking to destroy the Earth as he sees it as a threat to his new home. Thus begins an all-out war between the newly teamed Fantastic Four and Victor on Victor's turf as he launches an all-out assault to destroy the planet. And all of it is shot with a muddy, gross, dark aesthetic that renders the action unpleasant to look at. It's also tonally all over the place as the team isn't fully established as a team and only starts to develop chemistry just as the movie is ending. 

Fantastic Four is a gigantic mess and whether that is the fault of a meddling studio or an insecure director deflecting blame is something we can't know for sure. What we can know for sure is the movie makes little sense, appears to have been cobbled together from disparate pieces and is a general embarrassment for all involved. Poor Kate Mara is perhaps taking the brunt of the bad press as the reshoots and her abhorrent wig have become emblematic of the many, many problems plaguing this doomed adaptation. 

But she's not alone, no one gets out of Fantast Four (2015) unscathed. For poor Miles Teller this was a first shot at super-stardom and it has fallen completely to pieces. For Jamie Bell, the chance to have a regular big paycheck from a popular franchise is lost, though being so thoroughly talented and easily employable on the indie film scene is likely a strong comfort for him. As for Michael B. Jordan, he'll probably be fine. Chris Evans survived a disastrous turn as Johnny Storm in this relatively young century, I'm sure Jordan will as well. 

As for director Josh Trank, none of this reflects well on him. While he valiantly proclaims himself the victim and the artist, he's also coming off as petulant, ungrateful, egotistical. He will likely be a hero in parts of the online world for his supposed integrity but that is unlikely to translate into regular work as a director, especially within a studio system eager to weed out the rebels and troublemakers. Having so openly made enemies while making a major franchise film, it seems unlikely we will see him back behind the camera any time soon. 

This review is becoming an autopsy so I will leave it here. This isn't a very good movie. I feel bad for all involved. 

Classic Movie Review Renaissance Man

Renaissance Man (1994) 

Directed by Penny Marshall 

Written by Jim Burnstein 

Starring Danny Devito, Mark Wahlberg, Gregory Hines, James Remar, Cliff Robertson

Release Date June 3rd, 1994

Published June 5th, 2024 

When I described what the movie Renaissance Man was about to my co-hosts on the I Hate Critics 1994 Podcast, they refused to believe that I was telling the truth. They refused to believe that Danny Devito plays an advertising executive who becomes a teacher on a military base and saves a group of at-risk soldiers by teaching them Shakespeare via hip hop. Reading back my description, I can understand the incredulous responses of my co-hosts. Reading back my own description, I can't really believe that the movie Renaissance Man exists. I also cannot believe that a movie this hackneyed and mawkish was directed by someone as talented as Penny Marshall. In fact, I choose to believe this was directed by her hack brother Garry as this is exactly the kind of tripe he always directed. 

Indeed, Renaissance Man stars Danny Devito as Bill Rago, a raging jerk of an ad-man who gets himself quite reasonably fired from his job for showing up late and generally bungling a big client meeting through his selfish, self-serving, arrogant, narcissism. Pro-Tip for screenwriters, how you introduce your main character is important, if you don't intend for us to hate your main character, come up with a way to introduce him that doesn't make us automatically loathe his presence. The fact this is Danny Devito and I cannot stand this character, says a lot. Devito is a beloved actor and seeing him in a lead role in a comedy should be welcoming. It's most assuredly not welcoming in Renaissance Man. 

Out of a job, Bill goes to the unemployment office were we get our third exposition dump in the first 15 minutes of this dreadful movie. Jennifer Lewis, a wonderful character actor, lays out the plot for us, does a bit of needless business that someone making this movie thought was funny, and then sends Bill on to the actual plot of the film. The unemployment office has found Bill a job on a military base. Since he has a masters degree, Bill will be teaching Basic Comprehension to a group of soldiers on the brink of being kicked out of the Army. 

The ragtag crew includes bumpkins and poor people of varying ethnicity. They bicker and bully and have no interest in saving their military careers until Bill decides to teach them Shakespeare. Apparently, learning and reciting Hamlet is somehow enough for these soldier to stay in the military after being on the brink of being kicked out? Who knows, this movie is so thoroughly idiotic that these soldiers could have watched a newsreel about venereal diseases and as long as they actually showed up, they would have been safe. So why does Bill even need to be here? Truly? The final exam for this 'Basic Comprehension' course that Bill randomly turns into a class on Shakespeare, is OPTIONAL. They don't have to take the final exam and they get to stay in the Army. What even is this movie? 

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal. 

Movie Review In a Violent Nature

In a Violent Nature (2024) 

Directed by Chris Nash

Written by Chris Nash 

Starring Ry Barrett, Andrea Pavlovic, Cameron Love, Reese Presley 

Release Date May 31st, 2024 

Published May 30th, 2024

In a Violent Nature is a bit hard to describe. It's brutal horror slasher movie with some stomach-churning scenes of violence. A masked killer stalks the woods and kills campers or anyone else who gets in his way. It all sounds like a rip off of Friday the 13th. Indeed, In a Violent Nature is inspired by that legendary horror franchise, but this no mere Jason movie. Director Chris Nash has made a horror slasher at a lake that takes the tropey premise and used it as a vehicle for testing his filmmaking skills. 

The opening scene of In a Violent Nature reveals the style and patience of writer and director Chris Nash. The camera falls on a decrepit structure in the woods. There is no music score, just the sound of nature and a pair of male voices. The two men are arguing over something they've seen hanging from a broken piece of the structure. It's a gold locket. One of the unseen men says that the locket is there for a reason and that they should leave it be. The other argues in favor of taking it. After the first man leaves, the second man makes his move and steals the locket. 

This is a terrific piece of filmmaking and writing. It creates an expectation surrounding an object, a locket. The locket will become our McGuffin, the thing that is desired by our characters and essential to our lead actor. Meanwhile, the expectations of the horror genre are that this locket belongs to a backwoods, hillbilly, serial killer. We assume that he will soon return to this decrepit structure, see that his gold locket is missing and go on a killing spree and we're mostly right. But where we are wrong is a great piece of visual subversion. 

Here, director Nash cuts to a shot looking down at what we thought was a broken tree or perhaps a piece of this structure having fallen off and struck in the ground. What it actually is, is a piece of pipe with a hole in the top. Underneath the pole is a grave and from this grave emerges our killer. It's an incredible and disturbing reveal that upends our expectations, grabs our attention and kick starts the rest of the movie, the search and destroy mission to recover that gold locket and kill anyone who gets in the way. This is done in less than three minutes of screentime without us having seen the killer's face or any of his soon to be victims. 

Now, you might assume that In a Violent Nature will move in a more conventional and familiar direction, but no. The movie instead stays with our killer and patiently and methodically follows him as he stalks through the forest. The beauty and bounty of the verdant and vibrant forest is juxtaposed by our bloody, nasty, ugly killer and by the poor animals caught in traps surrounding the forest, carcasses left to rot in the sun. If our killer has an opinion about this, we won't ever know for sure. What we do know is that the traps will lead him to his next victim. All the while, the movie patiently and silently stays by the side of the killer. 

Find my full length review in the Horror Community on Vocal.Find my full length review in the Horror Community on Vocal. 

Lawless and Tom Hardy's Dichotomies and Paradoxes

Lawless (2012)

Directed by John Hillcoat 

Written by Nick Cave

Starring Tom Hardy, Shia LaBeouf, Gary Oldman, Mia Wasikowska, Jessica Chastain, Jason Clarke, Guy Pearce

Release Date August 29th, 2012 

'Lawless' and Tom Hardy's Dichotomies and Paradoxes

Sean Patrick

Sean Patrick, Yahoo Contributor Network

Aug 27, 2012

MORE:Tinker Tailor Soldier SpyLawlessTom HardyNick CaveThe Weinstein Company

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Tom Hardy returns to theaters this week in "Lawless." The story of legendary 1920's bootleggers The Bondurant Brothers, "Lawless" is the latest violent epic from the team of director John Hillcoat and writer Nick Cave ("The Proposition").

In an interview released by The Weinstein Company, the film's distributor, Tom Hardy talked about why accepted the role of Forrest Bondurant in "Lawless"

"I take characters as they come that interest me… that have scope and diversity; different ranges and colors and characteristics that are interesting and I find paradoxes and dichotomies of man."

Here is a look at how this philosophy has influenced Hardy as his star has risen in Hollywood; his most diverse and fascinating 'paradoxes and dichotomies.'

"Bronson"

Hardy's break out role is among the most fearsome and daring introductions of any actor, I have ever seen. "Bronson" is all about performance and Hardy commands the screen with such vigor that he damn near wins you over toward admiring his utterly psychotic character; based on a real life English criminal who's been in prison for nearly his entire adult life. Here Hardy finds a wonderful dichotomy a man of complete charm who is utterly incapable of putting that charm to good use and instead becomes a violent sociopath.

"Inception"

As a reaction to the grit of his "Bronson" character Hardy chose to show off his dashing handsome side in the brilliant, Oscar nominated Christopher Nolan movie "Inception." Hardy's Eames is a chameleon who in the world of this movie can enter people's dreams and become just about anyone. Here Hardy in a supporting role explores the paradox of a man who can become anyone yet is fully self-assured and comfortable with who he really is.

"Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy"

In the quiet English thriller "Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy" Hardy is once again a chameleon. As Ricki Tarr, a British spy charged with dangerous, often very violent tasks, Hardy plays the dichotomy of a man with no identity who finds himself in love for the first time and wishing he could reveal who he really is. When the love of Ricki's life is taken from him his identity becomes further fractured and he becomes even more dangerous. In any other movie this would lead to fights but in tight lipped, close to the vest style of British intelligence Ricki's dangerous side is expressed through the other characters and their concern for how his sanity might affect their well-being.

"Warrior"

The struggle for identity is once again central to Hardy's work in the family drama "Warrior." In the real life story of two brothers who rise through the ranks of Mixed Martial Arts to face each other for a championship prize Hardy plays a heroic former soldier who is eager for no one to know of his heroism. His reasons for hiding who is would constitute a spoiler so I will not delve to deeply there. That struggle however plays strongly opposite the other pain that drives him; the pain derived from his broken childhood. These two competing pains drive Tommy to feel little pain when he's fighting, yet another fascinating paradox.

"The Dark Knight Rises"

The paradoxes of Hardy's Bane in "The Dark Knight Rises" requires more spoilers than I am comfortable revealing even with a film that's already been seen most of the world. I can tell you that Hardy's unique magnetism and charisma shot through the prism of a sociopath every bit as dangerous as his 'Charlie Bronson' is a paradox every bit as interesting as the character touches the film adds to Bane late in the film.

"Lawless"

In his latest film, Hardy enjoys the notion of Forrest Bondurant as a naïve, almost childlike man who is capable of horrendous violence. At once innocent and dangerous, Hardy's Forrest is just the kind of mixture of warring characteristics that have driven Hardy throughout his rise to stardom.

Chasing Mavericks' and the Sad History of the Surfer Movie

Chasing Mavericks (2012) 

Directed by Curtis Hanson, Michael Apted

Written by Kario Salem

Starring Gerard Butler, Jonny Weston, Elisabeth Shue, Abigail Spencer

Release Date October 26th, 2012 

Fact, there has never been a great surfing movie. For all the popularity of the sport of surfing, Hollywood has never been able to take it seriously or treat with comic distance in any memorable. Sure, a few documentaries have approached the subject and come away watchable but when you have to go back to the late sixties hippy surfer doc "Endless Summer" to cite an example of a modestly entertaining surf movie, you're really proving the point of this article.

With the surfer drama "Chasing Mavericks" riding the curl into theaters this month it's a good time as any to reflect on the forgettable history of the surfer movie.

Frankie and Annette

The first inklings of surfing on the big screen came in the Frankie Avalon-Annette Funnicello beach movies of the early 1960's. Granted, it's a stretch to call these surf movies, as surfing as only glimpsed and not truly the subject, we can see the surfer archetype taking shape in these films and for that they are notable here.

Point Break

There is a fair argument to be made that "Point Break" starring Patrick Swayze and Keanu Reeves is the best-known surfing movie of all time. Yes, the film is really about bank robbers who happen to be surfers but ask a modern movie fan about surfing in movies and you will inevitably raise the topic of "Point Break." That "Point Break" is also best known as the smelliest of B-movie cheese only serves to underline my point about surfing movies.

Maudlin Drama

While I can't say for sure that "Chasing Mavericks" falls into the category of maudlin drama, the film's trailer does hue in that direction. The maudlin drama is a popular form for the surfing movie yielding the 1987 tear-jerker "North Shore" and the 2011, based on a true story, heart-tugger "Soul Surfer as well as the least interesting parts of the Kate Bosworth eye candy flick "Blue Crush." Notice that none of these movies rises immediately to mind even as they are the rare movies to take surfing seriously.

The Best Surf Movie?

The one film that ever approached being a good surfing movie happens to be an animated movie about penguins. "Surf's Up" featuring the voices of Shia Le Beouf as a wannabe surfer and Jeff Bridges as his grumpy yet goofy mentor is at the very least fun to look at with bright colors and fluid animation (pun intended). "Surf's Up" is probably the best surfing movie since "Endless Summer," even as that doesn't ring up as high praise. "Surf's Up" is achingly conventional and eye-rollingly predictable but in the surf genre it's not hard to set the bar.

Director Jeremy Regimbal Talks About His Thriller 'In Their Skin'

In Their Skin (2012) 

Directed by Jeremy Regimbal

Written by Joshua Close

Starring Selma Blair, Joshua Close, Rachel Miner, James D'arcy

Release Date September 11th, 2012 

The thriller "In Their Skin" evokes the cult thriller "Single White Female" and the creepy notion of envy turning to murderous obsession. "In Their Skin" stars Selma Blair and Joshua Close as a married couple recovering from a parent's worst nightmare, the loss of a child. In their first family vacation since the death of their daughter, they have taken their young son to a vacation home in the woods.

As horror film fans we know that a house in the middle of the forest is a recipe for disaster and when a family claiming to be neighbors, despite their being no neighbors for miles, happens by early one morning, the eerie stage is set for a horrific fight to the death. James D'Arcy and Rachel Miner are the bad guys eager for a new life, the lives belonging to Blair and Close.

Jeremy Regimbal directed "In Their Skin" and he was kind enough to sit for an interview to discuss the motivations of this story, the creepy setting, and his various sources that he drew upon for "In Their Skin"

Sean Patrick - Jeremy, thanks for joining us. Let's talk about "In Their Skin" talk about telling this story from the perspective of this troubled family.

Jeremy Regimbal - For sure, you know we wanted to focus on the relationship of the family you know and it just set it against a thriller, kind of horrific backdrop but the biggest, our big focus was to focus on this family's relationship going through these horrific events kind of making them become present and fall back in love.

SP - Let's talk about your cast. Selma Blair is terrific in this movie.

JG - Yeah absolutely, no she's, she was great to work with we were so lucky that she was one of the first people to become interested in the script which was, you know, amazing and helped us make it happen. Josh, I don't know how much you know about Josh, he was the writer of the screenplay and is a close collaborator of mine, he and Justin, his brother are both my business partners, we work very closely. Yeah, it was a great cast, we had 16 days to shoot so having such a great cast allowed us to be flexible and to try things and try things on the spot and that was great.

SP - Let's talk about your inspirations. In watching the film I can see a touch of Brian De Palma, what inspirations did you bring to the film?

JR - I don't know; it's funny I've had a lot of conversations about this. It's weird, me and the cinematographer (Norm Li) took a lot of stills from films and photography and different stuff that we really liked and that inspired us. But, I just in general, (David) Fincher is one of my favorites, I'm not saying this film is 'Fincher-esque,' you know because we tried to avoid camera movements at all cost, that was our goal going into it. There were lots of different (influences), "Little Children" was a film visually that we kind of referenced, "Seven," and I like Michael Haneke's style of sparse editing and stuff like that, but a lot of the behind the head stuff could have been inspired by "The Wrestler" and (Darren) Aronofsky, I love how he tends to do that as well.

SP - Lets' talk about that house in the woods; it's a terrifically creepy setting and almost like another character in the film in the way you use the space.

JR - We were so, so lucky with that location, you could really say that was anywhere. We lucked out that we found that in Canada, in the middle of nowhere, in this old school farm. The house was one of the most important characters of the film so it was really important that we found the perfect place.

SP - The film is very creepy in its simplicity….

JR - Definitely, I feel that makes it kind of relatable, that this set up could happen to anyone. I felt like Mark, part of his problem with his relationship and everything was that he was not very proactive and he doesn't take initiative so I felt that it (the story) was mirroring his relationship.

SP - Being in this situation forces Mark and his to re-engage in their life and family…

JR - Yeah absolutely, they're forced to come back together and work as a unit like they did when they were in love at the beginning of their marriage and that was a big focus of what we wanted to put them through is make them live in the present, make them live in the now and don't take what they have for granted because it could be gone very quickly.

SP - This is a genre film, a thriller what's your take on the genre?

JR - I'm a huge fan of thriller films. I love that kind of stuff and I think it's so important to slowly be revealing information whether it's the relationship or the danger and to slowly giving a little piece of information every scene and the way we did that, we had a great sound designer (Kirby Jinnah) and composer (Keith Power) and also the editor (Austin Andrews) did a great job, I'm an editor by trade so we spent a lot of time trying to under-edit the film.

"In Their Skin" opened in limited theatrical release on November and is available via Amazon Instant Video now. Yahoo Movies gives the film's title as "Replicas" though the title via the director and other sources is "In Their Skin."

A Handy Guide to the Villains of the DieHard Franchise

Published February 12th, 2012 

Bruce Willis is bringing one of the great action heroes of all time back to the big screen as John McClane battles terrorists alongside his son in "A Good Day to Die Hard." Of course, a great movie hero is only as great as his nemesis. In four previous outings John McClane has faced off against a who's who of terrific villains. Here's a closer look at John McClane's best bad guys.

Hans Gruber (Alan Rickman) "Die Hard"

When terrorists take over Nakatomi Plaza amidst a company Christmas party they playact the role of terrorists out to punish the Nakatomi Corp for its greed. The sinister reality as laid out by terrorist leader Hans Gruber is that the terror plot is merely cover for the theft of $640 million dollars in bearer bonds. Alan Rickman plays Hans Gruber as a brilliant but arrogant criminal with a barely concealed admiration for the New York City cop with the uncanny ability to disrupt his well-oiled machine of a plot. Rickman's well-dressed smarm and charm thief was the perfect foil for Willis's blue collar hero.

Colonel Stuart (William Sadler) "Die Hard 2: Die Harder"

One of the many reasons "Die Hard 2: Die Harder," aside from the awful subtitle, comes up far short of the original "Die Hard" is the lack of a great villain. No offense to character actor William Sadler who brings a veteran's capability to the sneering, sniggering traitor Colonel Stuart but he's no match for Rickman's Hans Gruber in the charisma department. The proof of Sadler's lacking is everywhere as two more villains are brought in on top of Colonel Stuart to try to make up for the deficit; Franco Nero's South American drug kingpin General Esperanza and John Amos as turncoat Major Grant. Even with three top villains, "Die Hard 2: Die Harder" remains the least of the "Die Hard" franchise.

Simon Peter Gruber (Jeremy Irons) "Die Hard with a Vengeance"

The true sequel to "Die Hard" came in 1995 with the release of "Die Hard with a Vengeance" featuring the return of the Gruber name as a worthy foe to Willis's John McClane. With the plot shifted to New York City, Simon Peter Gruber attempts to pull off the same heist his brother died trying in the original "Die Hard," a multi-multi-million dollar heist disguised as a terror attack. Of course, the plot is given a real edge by Simon Peter Gruber's intent to take revenge on John McClane for the death of his brother Hans. Jeremy Irons is expertly cast as Simon with an accented charm that perfectly evokes Rickman's Hans and a wealth of devilish charm; also reminiscent of the series seminal villain.

Thomas Gabriel (Timothy Olyphant) "Live Free or Die Hard"

Having abandoned any pretense of reality by having John McClane once again happen accidentally into a terror plot, the makers of "Live Free or Die Hard" nevertheless chose a timely, relevant villain for its outlandish action. Thomas Gabriel is a former State Department analyst turned cyber-terrorist who roils the national and world financial markets with cyber-attacks while paralyzing the seats of power in the U.S by tying up power and traffic grids. Timothy Olyphant is maybe a tad too handsome to be believed as a guy whose spent years at a keyboard but like Hans and Simon Gruber before him, he doesn't lack in the charm department. Gabriel is maybe a tad more strident and political than the Gruber's who were more defined by their greed, but he makes up for it by being a shade more evil than the Gruber's forcing McClane to ever more insane levels of action including flying a jet and driving a car into a helicopter.

Alik (Rasha Bukvic) "A Good Day to Die Hard"

"Taken" bad guy Rasha Bukvic is saddled with the task of living up to the standard set by Rickman and Irons as the big bad of "A Good Day to Die Hard." Bukvic plays Alik the top henchman of a high ranking Russian politico eager to murder a whistleblower who is under the protection of the CIA, led by none other than Jack McClane ("Spartacus" star Jai Courtney), son of our hero John. Can Bukvic bring the chilling charm and evil of Rickman and Irons, or at the very least, the handsome evil of Olyphant? We will have to wait and see when "A Good Day to Die Hard" opens on Valentine's Day across the U.S.

Classic Movie Review The Crow

The Crow (1994) 

Directed by Alex Proyas 

Written by David J. Schow, John Shirley

Starring Brandon Lee, Ernie Hudson, Michael Wincott, Bai Ling, Michael Massee 

Release Date May 13th, 1994

Published May 21st, 2024 

The Crow is a haunting experience in more ways than one. It's a beautifully told tragic love story of grand ambition and a memorable goth aesthetic. But's also a virtual tomb for star Brandon Lee. Lee was killed in an on set accident that haunts every single frame of the movie. The dark coincidence of Lee dying while playing a character who was already dead adds a chilling layer to the movie that was, obviously never intended. And yet, the tragedy also deepens our connection to the character of Eric Draven and the romantic tragedy that was supposed to be his defining characteristic.

In Detroit, Devil's Night is a tradition in which the criminal underworld rises up to remind the populace who is really in charge of the city. This is a city of criminals, mercenaries, and crime lords who assert dominance through violence. Making people afraid is good for business and thus, when Shelly, a lovely young, soon to be married young woman complains about the condition of the apartment she shares with her soon to be husband, Eric (Lee), reprisal is needed to show her and everyone else that the apartment owner is not to be trifled with.

It's genuinely unknown if the criminals who attacked Shelly on Devil's Night intended to kill her or just violently terrify her into silence. Regardless, when Eric arrives and interrupts the violent encounter, the stakes go up and Eric is killed. Shelly will die soon after from the horrific injuries inflicted upon her. The pure agony of these deaths are a wound on the universe. It's as if the price paid by Shelly and Eric was so out of proportion to the good in the world that the universe needed to offer a correction of some sort. Therein lies The Crow.

A year after his death, with the despair and agony of his death still lingering over the people who knew and cared about he and Shelly, Eric Draven rises from the grave. A singular crow stands atop his grave and will guide Eric on his brief sojourn back into the world of the living. The bargain the universe has made to balance the scales for the death of Eric and Shelly, is to have Eric return to the Earth to kill the men who killed Shelly. This includes everyone who attacked Shelly in the apartment and the man who orchestrated the attack, a crime boss nicknamed Top Dollar (Michael Wincott).

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal. Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal. 

Movie Review Back to Black

Back to Black (2024) 

Directed by Sam Taylor Johnson

Written by Matt Greenhalgh

Starring Marisa Abela, Jack O'Connell, Leslie Manville, Eddie Marsan 

Release Date May 17th, 2024 

Published May 21st, 2024 

Why did director Sam Taylor Johnson want to tell this story? Is she a fan of Amy Winehouse? It's hard to say based on Johnson's new movie Back to Black. This is nothing biopic that offers no insight on Amy Winehouse, her art or her tragic death. The emptiness of Back to Black reminded me more of Johnson's Fifty Shades sequel than her slightly more accomplished John Lennon movie, Nowhere Boy. In that film, at the very least, we sensed that there was joy in the discovery of artistic talent and the forming of bonds that would become legendary. Back to Black carries little joy beyond playing Amy Winehouse's music. I could have gotten the same insights sitting at home next to my record player. 

Back to Black opens on an odd image. Amy Winehouse, played by Marisa Abela, is running down a London Street alone. The camera is shooting down at her from overhead. If this were a male director I'd want to ask why they have decided to aim the camera in a way that centers Marisa abela's cleavage as it bounces while she runs. The odd angle is perhaps, if I were to stretch a little, a visual comment on the strange way we view celebrities, but that's a pretty big stretch. Realistically, I can't think of a good reason for this visual. It's also a piece of a scene that unfolds later in the movie, not the end, it's not a preview of the end of the movie, it's a piece from around the end of the second act. So why does the movie start with this? I can't think of a reason. 

From here, we bounce back in time. A family party has Amy showing off her love of Jazz standards a mind for memorizing classic songs that she can repeat with out accompaniment. For someone as young as Amy to have memorized songs by Jazz legends speaks not only to her influences but her talent for adapting that style into her own remarkable pop styling. This, again, is an observation I could have made from listening to an Amy Winehouse record, but whatever, Marisa Abela sounds great and she has a big presence to her, reminiscent of Winehouse's outsized personality. 

Find my full length review in the Beat Community on Vocal Find my full length review in the Beat Community on Vocal 

Classic Movie Review Wait Until Dark

Wait Until Dark (1968) 

Directed by Terence Young

Written by Robert Carrington, Jane Howard-Carrington

Starring Audrey Hepburn, Alan Arkin, Richard Crenna, Efrem Zimbalist Jr. 

Release Date October 26th, 1967 

Published 

Wait Until Dark opens on a close up of a piece of sill being surgically sliced. A pull back reveals a man opening up the back of a doll of some sort, a plush baby doll, filled with cotton. A woman stands near the man, fretting. Her name is Lisa (Samantha Jones), and she has a plane to catch. She's waiting on the elderly man to open the doll, place several kilos of Heroin inside the doll, and sew it back up. The doll is our MacGuffin, the Hitchcockian thing that everyone in the plot wants, has, or unknowingly possesses. As Lisa rushes from the elderly man's apartment with the Heroin filled dolly, he watches her through the window as she rushes into a cab. 

Director Terence Young was well into a lengthy, prolific, and not particularly memorable directorial career when he made Wait Until Dark. His best-known works were three of Sean Connery's James Bond movies, Dr. No, From Russia with Love, and Thunderball. If you enjoyed James Bond, you likely enjoyed those movies. Beyond his Bond work however, Young wasn't particularly noted. He did direct movies for 40 years, starting in 1948 and ending in 1988 but by 1988 he was working with the likes of Franco Nero rather than people like Sean Connery and Audrey Hepburn. 

Young is a utility player to borrow a baseball term. Plug him in on a day when someone needs a rest, and he will play the field well and perhaps not be an automatic strikeout at the plate. He started during the days of studio pictures when guys like him could manage a few movies per year, rarely pausing between films, not particularly worried about the post-production part of the movie. This might sound mean-spirited, like I am diminishing a man who worked in Hollywood for literally 40 years as a director, but I assure that is not my intent. Indeed, one of my favorite directors of all time was very similar to Terence Young. Like Young, Michael Curtiz was a studio director. He knocked out movies on time and on budget and bounced from one project to the next unconcerned about what the studio did with the movie. Michael Curtiz made Casablanca under that system. 

Terence Young doesn't exactly have a Casablanca on his resume but, Wait Until Dark is a good flick. Written by Robert and Jane Carrington, adapting a play written by Frederick Knox, Wait Until Dark follows that heroin filled doll from Canada to New York City where Lisa passes the doll off to an unwitting accomplice, Sam Hendrix (Efrem Zimbalist Jr.). Sam is a photographer headed home to his lovely wife, Susy (Audrey Hepburn), who happens to be blind. Naturally, there are dangerous men who want that doll for what is inside of it. These include a pair of con artists, Talman (Richard Crenna) and Carlino (Jack Weston). And working with and against the con artists is the most dangerous man of all, Harry Roat (Alan Arkin). 

Structurally, we've reached the fun and games portion of the movie. With Sam sent off to a photography assignment in New Jersey, secretly arranged by Harry Roat, Susy is home alone and vulnerable. The plan has Roat manipulating his new accomplices Talman and Carlino to get inside Susy's apartment and convince her to give them the doll. This involves convincing her that Sam is involved in the death of Lisa, the woman who brought the doll to New York and gave it to Sam. She was killed off screen by Roat who then framed Talman and Carlino in order to blackmail them to help him roust Susy. Unfortunately, Susy has no idea where the doll is. She knows Sam brought it home but where it went from there, she has no idea. 

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal 

Movie Review Get Him to the Greek

Get Him to the Greek (2010) 

Directed by Nicholas Stoller 

Written by Nicholas Stoller

Starring Russell Brand, Jonah Hill, Elisabeth Moss, Sean Diddy Combs, Rose Byrne

Release Date June 4th, 2010 

The character Aldous Snow was created for the movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall by producer, screenwriter and star Jason Segal. However, when the role went to British comedian Russell it became entirely his. No one could play the debauched rocker as well as Brand has and now playing Aldous Snow in a lead role in Get Him to the Greek, Brand further expands the character and his mastery of him.

Rocker Aldous Snow has hit rock bottom. His latest record, African Child, has been unfavorably compared to famine and genocide while the ludicrous, highly pretentious music video is the subject of vast derision. Worse yet, his longtime, kind of, sort of, girlfriend Jackie Q (Rose Byrne), the mother of his son, has left him for a string of Hollywood bad boys. The loss leads Aldous back to his drugged out, debauched old self after 7 years of sobriety. It's also led to the near complete destruction of his career. 

Meanwhile in Los Angeles, Aldous's record company has an idea to give Aldous a comeback. A junior exec named Aaron Green (Jonah Hill) wants to bring Aldous to L.A and the Greek Theater where his live record became an instant rock classic a decade ago. Charged by his boss Sergio (Sean P. Diddy Combs) to bring Aldous to L.A in three days, Aaron finds himself navigating the rapids of sex, drugs and massive egos with one of the last real rock stars in the world. What's supposed to be a trip to L.A with a quick stop in New York for the Today Show, quickly turns into a drug fueled rampage from London to New York to Las Vegas and maybe Los Angeles.

Whether Aldous Snow makes his big return to the Greek Theater stage is a moot point. It's all about the brilliantly funny journey and Russell Brand makes the journey constantly hysterical. Brand's style is a riffing, improvised style so off the cuff you will be hard pressed to figure what was in the script and what was in the moment. The style gives Get Him to the Greek a comic edge that few other actors could give it.

Russell Brand brings an unexpected authenticity to Aldous Snow in both his rocker debauchery and his charming narcissism. Brand embodies the rock star image like few non-rock stars ever could. He is believable on-stage singing oddball tunes like The Clap, Inside You and the completely brilliant Furry Walls and off stage with all the drugs, sex and privilege old school rock stars are known for. Jonah Hill hangs well with Brand and grounds the film in its alternate universe reality. As the nebbish Aaron, Hill is perfectly at home getting wasted with Aldous or sparking sweetly with Aaron's girlfriend played by Mad Men star Elizabeth Moss. While Russell Brand presses the limits of Aldous's likability, Hill's Aaron gives the film the human element it needs for the outrageousness to build into bigger and bigger laughs.

Russell Brand, Jonah Hill and the scene stealing, Sean Combs, pile one big laugh on top of another while also delivering characters we like and want to spend time with. Dramatic moments involving Aldous's drug problem and his ex-girlfriend are perfunctory and stop the movie cold for a few minutes, but these scenes are brief and easily forgiven because what leads to and follows those scenes is so hysterically funny. Get Him to the Greek is easily the funniest film of 2010 so far and a good candidate to stay at the top for the rest of the year. Parents should be advised however that the film earns its R-rating. Drugs, sex, brief violence and plenty of raw language make Get Him to the Greek adults only fare.

Movie Review Furiosa A Mad Saga

Furiosa A Mad Max Saga 

Directed by George Miller

Written by George Miller, Nico Lathouris

Starring Anya Taylor Joy, Chris Hemsworth, Tom Burke

Release Date May 24th, 2024 

Published May 27th, 2024 

Furiosa rocks. It's a really great movie. I have been struggling with writing this review for a few days because, I wasn't sure I had much to add to the Furiosa discourse. It's a killer movie and most critics have already told you that. So, to try and make my review a little difference, I am just going to pick a part of the movie I like and use that to illustrate why Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga is so good.

So, a brief plot description and set up. As a child, Furiosa, yes that's her actual name, it's not something she adopted like a nickname, get over it. As a child, Furiosa was kidnapped by marauders. Her mother gave chase and nearly rescued her. Mom gets killed and child Furiosa begins a banger of a revenge arc. She will spend the rest of her life trying to find and kill the leader of these evil marauders, Dementus (Chris Hemsworth).

Years later, Furiosa gets traded to Immortan Joe. It's part of a deal with Dementus who has captured the kingdom of Gasland, where all the gas in this post-apocalyptic wasteland is produced. Dementus gives Furiosa to Joe as a gesture of peace. Soon after, Furiosa escapes and becomes a slave of the Citadel, pretending to be a boy to prevent being a wife of Joe. After years of this, she gets her chance to escape after she helps build the prototype of the War Rig, Immortan Joe's most important vehicle, a truck that carries supplies in trade for gas and bullets.

The best scene in Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga has Furiosa tagging along on the first run of the War Rig. She's hidden herself beneath the rig with a motorcycle tied to to the bottom. When the rig stops, she will escape on her motorcycle and try to find her way back to her childhood realm, a place of abundance that her mother died to protect. Furiosa's bold escape plan is foiled when the War Rig is attacked by marauders who deal some damage to the rig and Furiosa is forced to defend the rig to save herself.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal. Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal. 

Documentary Review Restrepo

Restrepo (2010) 

Directed by Tim Hetherington, Sebastian Junger 

Written by Documentary 

Starring Members of the U.S Military 

Release Date June 25th, 2010 

Having been at war in Afghanistan for more than 8 years now it is no surprise that most Americans have begun to take the danger for granted. Nearly 8 years of politicians using the war as a cudgel against their political opponents and 8 years of news pundits spinning the war as a policy debate, it makes sense that many have grown jaded and have lost perspective.

"Restrepo" is a documentary that wrenches our perspective back to the matters at hand, the men who are on the front line fighting for the hearts and minds of the Afghan people as they attempt to survive and kill the enemy. Embedded with troops in the place that has been called the 'Deadliest place in the world' the Korangel Valley, journalists Sebastian Junger and Tim Hetherington bring devastating clarity to what is at stake in Afghanistan.

PFC Juan S. Restrepo was a Platoon Medic with Second Platoon B Company, 2nd Battalion 503rd Infantry Regiment. He was also a 20 something kid who with a big easy smile, a gregarious manner and a love for playing flamenco guitar. Early in the deployment of Second Platoon B Company, PFC Restrepo was shot and killed by members of the Taliban.

In his name the remaining members of B Company name their newest camp OP Restrepo. This outpost is remarkable for its dangerous position. It is high on a mountainside that had been crawling with members of the Taliban. It remains surrounded on all sides by potential members of the Taliban, those hiding among the citizens of the small villages in the Korangal Valley, and of course the real Taliban who may be no more than 100 yards away and sometimes closer.

Inside OP Restrepo we meet a remarkable and diverse group of our best and bravest. The standout is the leader Captain Dan Kearney whose determination to tame one of the most dangerous places in the world at first seems naive and then seems almost manageable through the sheer force of his professionalism.

Captain Kearney's assignment is to win the hearts and minds of the locals while creating a safe passage for workers building roads through the valley that will connect supply lines and bring some life and economy to these villages. The locals have heard these promises before but never I'm sure with conviction and strength. Kearney is the essence of tough but fair, unwilling to bend to the locals but never dismissive or disrespectful. The mission comes first with Kearney that means protecting his men and winning hearts and minds regardless of the dire circumstance or the seeming futility of effort. His professionalism is an example of the best we have to offer in our military.

The faces of the soldiers of Company B can tend to run together what with the buzzcuts and military garb but their personal stories when interviewed after the events of their 15-month deployment stand out in striking and heart-rending fashion. The stories they tell are stories of remarkable danger, pulse pounding, heat of the moment accounts that must be heard.

Heard they are but as filmed by Junger and Hetherington, they are seen as well in stunning, violent detail. Bullets sail over the heads of the soldiers, strike just at their feet and send the Journalists scurrying to the ground in search of cover. Most harrowing is the story and film of Operation Rock Avalanche during which B Company heads deep into the Korangal and come face to face with the enemy. Captain Kearney recalls in one interview members of the Taliban getting so close to his men that they could physically assault them and steal their supplies in the night. This is the war they never tell you about on the news.

Our complacency is shattered by Restrepo a trip deep inside of war like nothing you have ever seen on film. Years and years of operations in Afghanistan have passed and our culture has grown more and more weary and distant from the real dangers. Restrepo is a necessary film, required viewing as a reminder of the true, human cost of war.

Politicians argue policy and score cheap political points on Afghanistan on an almost daily basis and that is on both sides. What "Restrepo" does is remind us that when we go to war we had better know what we are fighting for, why we are fighting and never forget what the brave, brilliant soldiers who with their professionalism, valor and ungodly talents will have to sacrifice to achieve our goals.

Cop Out

Cop Out (2010) 

Directed by Kevin Smith

Written by Kevin Smith

Starring Bruce Willis, Tracy Morgan, Adam Brody, Kevin Pollak, Seann William Scott

Release Date February 26th, 2010 

Let's get one thing straight, I am in fact a Kevin Smith apologist. I have loved all of Kevin's movies, yes even “Jersey Girl,” loved it. Thus, I remove any thought of objectivity from this review of “Cop Out.” I am a Kevin Smith fan and I liked “Cop Out.” While other critics seem to delight in trashing this harmless, filthy mouthed throwback to 80's buddy cop movies, I sat back and laughed uproariously.

“Cop Out” stars Bruce Willis and Tracey Morgan as detectives Jimmy Monroe and Paul Hodges. They seem like total opposites; Jimmy is laid back yet menacing while Paul is wild and outlandish. Yet, they have been partners for years with a notable reputation - good cops who tend to find trouble.

The latest trouble involves getting an informant killed and blowing a major undercover drug sting. This gets them suspended for a month. Meanwhile, Jimmy is trying to find the cash to pay for his daughter's (Michelle Trachtenberg) wedding. This subplots offer funny sidelights for Jason Lee and Sean William Scott.

The meat of the plot unfolds when Jimmy gets robbed of a valuable baseball card and he and Jimmy set out to retrieve it. Naturally, the card lands in the hands of the drug dealer who they were after in the first place and none of this is really all that interesting or important. The plot of “Cop Out” is secondary to Smith, Willis and Morgan hamming it up in homage to the great buddy cop movies of the 80's.

Kevin Smith is the perfect director for “Cop Out.” The film is both a send up of and a loving tribute to goofball buddy cop movies. Smith, being a virtual pop culture almanac, delivers on every beat of the buddy cop movies we love right down to a synth pop score that only Harold Faltermeyer could really appreciate.

Kevin Smith, Bruce Willis and Tracey Morgan dive headlong into the parody fun not with obvious, “Naked Gun” style gags but by doing exactly what an 80's buddy cop movie did but with Kevin Smith style language, filled with plenty of four letter words and references that will someday make a great drinking game.

Is “Cop Out” a great movie? No. The plot is slapdash, the subplot payoffs are meaningless and don't even start on the continuity errors. None of that however, really matters because “Cop Out” is what it sets out to be, a goofball tribute to the buddy cop movies that dominated the 1980's. Forget the “Filmmaker Magazine” critiques; this is fun stuff for an audience seeking a mindless toss back to the movies they loved in the 80's.

Movie Review Marmaduke

Marmaduke (2010) 

Directed by Tim Dey

Written by Tim Rasmussen, Vince Di Meglio 

Starring Owen Wilson, Lee Pace, Judy Greer, William H. Macy, Steve Coogan, Fergie, Emma Stone, Marlon Wayans 

Release Date June 4th, 2010 

I have a distinct memory of enjoying Marmaduke as a little kid. Not the newspaper comic, for me, he was a side character amid the Heathcliff Saturday morning cartoon. Marmaduke was a large dog who always found trouble based on the fact that he was so large. Adapting Marmaduke for the big screen was... a choice. It is a well-known character with a minor fanbase, though most have grown out of Marmaduke or barely remember the comic. The film adaptation has to reinvent Marmaduke and wow, more.... choices. 

Owen Wilson stars as the voice of Marmaduke who finds himself moving in with the family of a marketing executive named Phil Winslow (Lee Pace) and his wife Debbie (Judy Greer). Phil needs Marmaduke to be his spokes-dog for a dog food brand but Marmaduke is too ill-behaved. He just wants to run around and find trouble with his new friend Carlos (George Lopez), and his kind of love interest, Mazie. But, when things really get out of hand, Phil sends Marmaduke to a dog trainer. There, he falls in with a popular crowd that threatens his new friends in the neighborhood. 

Despite his new friends, Marmaduke cannot resist wanting to be part of the popular pedigree crowd where the gorgeous Jezebel (Stacy 'Fergie' Ferguson) runs with the dog park's resident bad boy Bosco (Kiefer Sutherland). Naturally conflict ensues between Marmaduke and Bosco and the bonds of friendship, especially with Maizie, will be tested. Meanwhile Phil is ignoring his family, spending all his time working with his oddball new boss (William H. Macy, slumming for a paycheck) and only Marmaduke realizes how bad things are getting. 

These two stories coalesce boringly into one story by the end and don't be shocked when things end exactly as you predict. Marmaduke, directed by Tom Dey (Failure to Launch), was never meant to change the way we see kids movies. It was not meant to break boundaries or change the way kids see their world, it's a mindless bit of escapism with simpleminded morality at its center. The catchphrase for the film may as well be 'can't we all just get along,' it's literally that simple.

There is nothing wrong with that but the best kid’s films, the Pixar films, have the ability to deliver the same message without being treacle and simpleminded in the ways Marmaduke is. Director Dey and screenwriters Vince De Meglio and Tim Rasmussen cut paste their plot from other, similar films like Garfield or the Chipmunks, add special effects and voila. The special effects used to animate the giant mutt are strong enough that you don't take to much notice of them. The hallmark of success when you don't have the budget or the skill to dazzle ala James Cameron is to make sure the effects aren't noticeable; Marmaduke easily achieves this modest task.

I watched Marmaduke with a class of 2nd graders on a field trip. They laughed at the fart jokes and when Phil fell out of the bed and they squealed at the closing doggie dance sequence but for the most part they were silent and respectful. Some twitched in their seats a little but for the most part they were quiet, attentive and a little bored. Afterward, the kids talked about how much they loved dogs but by the time they were back on the bus the movie and its dull messages were long forgotten replaced by the want for ice cream and plans for the rest of the day, and a little bit of dozing here and there.

Maybe this benign effect is all that can be expected of a movie like Marmaduke. For me, I wish more children's films had the ambition to engage the minds of children, to challenge them to find central ideas and morals and explore them with their imagination. The creators of Marmaduke have neither the ambition nor, seemingly, the talent to attempt such a thing. On that count, Marmaduke is a waste of screen time. Parents, take heart Toy Story 3 arrives soon.

Movie Review This Means War

This Means War (2012) 

Directed by McG 

Written by Timothy Dowling, Simon Kinberg 

Starring Reese Witherspoon, Tom Hardy, Chris Pratt 

Release Date February 17th, 2012 

Recent to DVD the comedy “This Means War” is a criminally banal comedy starring three exceptional young stars in the hands of a competent but unimaginative director. The story of two spies using their skill and advanced technology as they compete for the heart of the same woman wastes three terrific stars and a solid premise on a series of mild and predictable gags.

Lauren (Reese Witherspoon) has had no luck with men. She moved to Los Angeles to with a man who dumped her soon after she arrived. Since then she has become focused on her job as a product tester and put seeking love on the back burner. Unfortunately for Lauren, her pal Trish won’t let her forget about love; eventually signing her up for online dating.

Through the love seeking website Trish meets Tuck (Tom Hardy), a kind and handsome travel agent. On the same day as her first date with Tuck she also meets FDR (Chris Pine) a jerky ladies man who tries to put the moves on her in a video store. What Lauren doesn’t know is that Tuck and FDR are friends and partners and spies. Soon, the smitten spies begin to compete for Lauren’s heart using the resources at their disposal to gain an intelligence advantage.

The idea of two spies using their spy craft to woo the same woman is wonderfully novel. Unfortunately, director McG doesn’t do anything unpredictable with this idea. Every beat, every joke, every turn of plot in “This Means War” is easy to predict. The plot gives you a great deal to work from and challenges the filmmaker to do something that audiences don’t expect and McG simply never does it.

With these three stars it is inexcusable that “This Means War” is so achingly mediocre. Tom Hardy and Chris Pine are evolving into major movie stars with Hardy starring in “Warrior” and “Inception” and Pine having given new life to Captain Kirk in “Star Trek.” And then there is Reese Witherspoon, arguably the easiest to like actress working today.

Witherspoon is the bright light of the modern romantic comedy. Her unique beauty and quirky approach to generally predictable material never fails to bring something interesting to the table. Even in “This Means War” Witherspoon’s charm is hardly dampened. Unfortunately, even Witherspoon’s charm can’t escape a plot so heavy handed and rote.

It’s not that McG is a bad director; the film is good looking and the story, such as it is, keeps a solid pace. The story logic is as strong as it is novel but the premise needed a touch up. We know from the marketing that these two guys are spies and she doesn’t know it so the film needs to find unique ways for the spies to use their craft. All we get from “This Means War” is people watching other people on hidden cameras.  

Surely there is more that could be done with spies than background checks via the internet and hidden webcams. Sadly, “This Means War” lacks the imagination to come up with anything more. It’s fair to assume that the filmmakers were relying on the stars to sell what they couldn’t but even stars as attractive as these can’t make nothing into something.

In the end what’s really hard to watch about “This Means War” is how truly mediocre it is. The film is well crafted and the stars are attractive but that’s not enough to get the movie past merely watchable. It would be easier for me to dismiss “This Means War” if it were truly bad but the film lingers in memory because it is so remarkably banal; a fact that is almost more offensive than if the film simply stunk. 

Movie Review Lock Out

Lock Out (2012) 

Directed by Steven Saint Leger, James Mather

Written by Luc Besson, Steven Saint Leger, James Mather

Starring Guy Pearce, Maggie Grace, Peter Stormare 

Release Date April 13th, 2012 

I’ve been somewhat obsessed with the TV ad for “Lockout” that praised the Guy Pearce starring action film as “Diehard Meets Blade Runner.” There are so many things wrong with this particular piece of praise that it’s difficult to narrow them all down. Most glaringly wrong is the disservice this overwhelming bit of critical puffery does to “Lockout.”

Comparing the fun, modestly entertaining, far from terrible “Lockout” to the awesomeness of either “Blade Runner” or “Diehard” puts far too much weight on the shoulders of what is a good but far from great sci-fi action movie. Comparing “Lockout” to both of those films combined is just outright cruelty; there is simply no way that any movie, especially “Lockout,” can live up to that standard.

Former CIA Operative Snow (Guy Pearce) was apparently in the wrong place at the wrong time when a powerful friend was murdered. Suspected of the killing himself, Snow is staring down a trip to the new multi-billion dollar space prison where madness from the station’s cryo-stasis whatnot machines awaits most, if not all who are sentenced there.

It would take, oh I don’t know, the President’s daughter Emily (Maggie Grace, “Lost”) getting kidnapped aboard that space prison for Snow to get out of this predicament. And whaddaya know, the President’s daughter is kidnapped aboard the space prison and only Snow can brave the newly unfrozen, madness addled prison population to rescue her before her dad is forced to blow the space prison out of space.

As my description demonstrates “Lockout” has a classically goofball sci-fi set up filled with enough stock villains and henchmen to fill 20 seasons of the old “Batman” TV series. The one thing that keeps “Lockout” from devolving into camp is star Guy Pearce who plays a slight variation on the wisecracking anti-hero we’ve come to know and be bored by in countless action films past.

It helps that Pearce is such an unexpected action star. In his best work, “L.A Confidential,” “Memento,” and “The Proposition,” Pearce used his thin frame and actorly flourish to sell audiences that he could survive just about any punishment. In “Lockout” however, Pearce is muscled up, heavily armed and wearing the standard issue stubble required of all modern anti-heroes.

The transformation is surprising and yet Pearce maintains some of the steeliness that made his earlier roles so memorable. His wisecracks have a little extra juice in them as if they weren’t just par for the action movie script course. Pearce twists his lines and tweaks the punches in a way that is similar to how Johnny Depp takes everyday dialogue and makes it sound like something no one has ever said before.

Pearce alone is worth the price of a ticket for “Lockout;” without him the film would likely be a droning bore of clichés. Maggie Grace is an attractive girl but saddled with the role of damsel in distress who occasionally gets to look tough, she’s as stuck as any other actress would be. The role is so standard at this point that even Meryl Streep with a complex accent couldn’t distinguish it.

In the end, the critic who claimed that “Lockout” was “Diehard meets Blade Runner” has done more to aggrandize his or her self than to praise the movie they seem to greatly admire. No film could live up to that standard and claiming the movie does rise to that standard is a disservice to the film’s true merits. A very fun, charismatic performance by Guy Pearce is thus lost as fans focus on the lack of “Blade Runner” and or “Diehard” qualities.

Movie Review Peter Rabbit

Peter Rabbit (2018) 

Directed by Will Gluck

Written by Ron Lieber, Will Gluck

Starring Rose Byrne, Domhnall Gleeson, James Corden, Daisy Ridley, Margot Robbie, Elizabeth Debicki

Release Date February 9th, 2018 

Peter Rabbit is the latest in a long line of kids movies based on dignified and beloved works of children’s fiction that replaces the dignity with shrill, unfunny modernity. Peter Rabbit takes Beatrix Potter’s lovely rabbit stories and wipes it’s furry feet on them with a terrible pop soundtrack and sub-Home Alone style gags so jarringly violent you begin to wonder if they belong in a kid's flick.

Peter Rabbit (James Corden) is a mischievous, blue jacket-wearing rabbit who enjoys wreaking havoc in the garden of Mr. McGregor (Sam Neill). That is, until one day when Mr. McGregor up and dies while attempting to kill Peter. No, that’s not something I am making up for effect; the guy dies in the first ten minutes. The death is played with comic effect, but it is a nonetheless dark way to start the movie.

Peter and his family, including Cotton Tail (Daisy Ridley), Flopsy (Margot Robbie), Mopsy (Elizabeth Debicki) and Benjamin (Colin Moody) then take over Mr. McGregor’s home and garden on the assumption they have won the place. They throw a party for their comically anthropomorphized animal buddies and begin to wonder where this adventure will take them next.

Meanwhile, in London, Thomas McGregor (Domnhall Gleeson) has just found out that he did not get his prized promotion at Harrods Department Store and went a little mad. Fired, he finds that his long forgotten Uncle has left him a country cottage. With nothing else to do, he heads for the country and sparks up a rivalry with Peter and his family while he attempts to rebuild the cottage and sell it.

Find  my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal.Find  my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal. 

Movie Review Becks

Becks (2018) 

Directed by Daniel Powell 

Written by Elizabeth Rohrbaugh 

Starring Lena Hall, Mena Suvari, Christine Lahti, Dan Fogler 

Release Date January 2018 

Becks is a wildly charming romantic drama about a woman who goes back to her hometown following a bad break up. Lena Hall stars in the film as Becks and while her story is familiar, her character is wholly original. Hall is funny, smart, sexy and original and if you can get around the familiarity of the storytelling tropes, you will really love this character and her journey.

When we meet Becks she is about to leave New York City for Los Angeles with her longtime girlfriend. The girlfriend has been invited to be part of a reality show for up-and-coming singers and is leaving for L.A early to set up their new home. However, when Becks finally arrives at her supposed new home, she finds her girlfriend has been cheating on her.

With no place to go and little money, Becks has no choice but to return to her hometown of St. Louis where her mother, Ann, played by Christine Lahti, is waiting to take her in. Ann, a former nun, has been trying to be open and accepting of her daughter’s lifestyle, but we can sense the tension between the two almost immediately. Thankfully, her old friend Dave (Dan Fogler) is there to be supportive and give her his bar to perform in.

It is while performing in Dave’s bar that Becks meets Elyse (Mena Suvari). Elyse happens to be the wife of her former High School bully, Mitch (Darren Richie), or Mitch the Bitch, as she used to call him. Mitch once attempted to out Becks at a High School dance, even before Becks herself knew she was gay. This slight has lingered for over a decade even as Mitch has now become a respected and friendly presence around town.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on VocalFind my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal

Movie Review Fifty Shades Freed

Fifty Shades Freed (2018)

Directed by James Foley

Written by Niall Leonard 

Starring Dakota Johnson, Jamie Dornan, Rita Ora, Luke Grimes, Victor Rasuk, Jennifer Ehle, Marcia Gay Harden

Release Date February 9th, 2018 

Female sexuality remains a barrier for many men. Think about it, we still have laws in many places in this country that REQUIRES half the population to wear a shirt when they go outside, because apparently boobs have some mysterious and dangerous power to them. This is reflected in modern movie culture which, despite having gone through periods marked by movies like Last Tango in Paris and 9 and ½ Weeks, has somehow become more uptight.

This, I believe, explains part of the fascination and cultish devotion surrounding E.L James’ 'Fifty Shades' franchise. Despite what are some obvious flaws in the storytelling, the freedom of Anastasia Grey’s sexuality, in the movies at least, if not the books which I have refused to read, marks a departure from most of modern popular culture. Dakota Johnson’s assured and enjoyed nudity may happen in the form of an insipid pop melodrama but taken on its own context, it’s among the most mature displays of sexuality in modern popular culture.

This brings us to the latest film in the 'Fifty Shades' franchise, Fifty Shades Freed. I will not argue that Fifty Shades Freed is a good movie; it’s most certainly not, from the perspective of just being a movie. However, as a ripe and rare display of female sexuality, again, apart from the book which I have heard is less kind to the Anastasia character than the movies, all credit to Dakota Johnson.

Fifty Shades Freed picks up the story of Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan) at their wedding, a surprisingly austere affair. We are thrust immediately into the nuptials which aren’t nearly as lavish as you’d imagine; especially when compared to the rest of the movie which is little more than architecture porn. Ana and Christian seem to have reached a place of mutuality though his jealousy is easily peaked, as when Ana decides to go topless in San Tropez.

Find my full length review in the Geeks Community on VocalFind my full length review in the Geeks Community on Vocal