Movie Review The Legend of La Llorona

The Legend of La Llorona 

Directed by Patricia Harris Seeley

Written by Cameron Larson, Jose Prendes, Patricia Harris Seeley

Starring Danny Trejo, Autumn Reeser, Antonio Cupo 

Release Date January 11th, 2022

The Legend of La Llorona is a laugh riot. I busted a gut watching The Legend of La Llorona but, unfortunately, that’s not exactly what the makers of the film had in mind for an audience response. The latest iteration of the Mexican legend of the weeping woman who curses and steals children is not intended to be a comedy. The intention was to make a horror movie and the team behind The Legend of La Llorona failed this intention in spectacularly silly fashion. 

The Legend of La Llorona stars Autumn Reeser and Antonio Cupo as Carly and Andrew Candlewood, a couple vacationing in Mexico and trying to recover from the recent loss of a baby that died in childbirth. They are traveling to Mexico with their 9 year old son Daniel much to the dismay of their caretaker, Mama Veronica (Angelica Lara), who was not expecting them to bring a child with them. Children in this area of Mexico have been going missing for years and Mama Veronica is worried for the child while also concerned that the parents will think she’s crazy if she explains why she is so worried.

Find my full length review at Horror.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review The Pink Cloud

The Pink Cloud 

Directed by Iuli Gerbase

Written by Iuli Gerbase 

Starring Renata De Lelis, Eduardo Mendonca, Girley Paes 

Release Date January 29th, 2021 

The Pink Cloud was made before the pandemic hit in 2020. I have to mention this because as I lay out the description of the plot of The Pink Cloud you may find that fact hard to believe. The Pink Cloud posits a story in which a man and woman hooking up on a one night stand end up stuck together in the woman’s home when their home in Brazil is surrounded by a Pink Cloud that kills anyone it touches in a mere 10 seconds of exposure. 

The echoes of Shelter in Place at the start of the pandemic are undeniable and the claustrophobic memories of isolation and fear are palpable. And yet, The Pink Cloud came into existence before we could all relate to it on such a bone deep level. This fact only serves to underscore the hypnotic power of this Brazilian movie which went from science fiction to speculative fiction with no effort whatsoever on the part of the filmmakers.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review The Free Fall

The Free Fall 

Directed by Adam Stillwell

Written by Kent Harper

Starring Andrea Londo, Shawn Ashmore

Release Date January 14th, 2022 

Content warning, this review mentions suicide and discusses a character attempting to take their own life. If depictions of suicide are a trigger for you, please either read with caution or click away from this review. I don’t recommend the movie The Free Fall which is far from a sensitive depiction of suicide, among many, many other failing elements. 

The Free Fall stars Andrea Londo as Sara, a young woman deeply traumatized by witnessing her mother murdering her father. So traumatized by the event was Sara that she almost immediately went from the bedroom where the murder suicide occurred before her eyes to the bathroom where Sara slipped into a bath and attempted to take her own life by cutting her wrists. Sara is saved by the arrival of her husband Nick (Shawn Ashmore).

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review Belle

Belle 

Directed by Mamoru Hosada

Written by Mamoru Hosada

Starring Kaho Nakamura, Ryo Narita, Shota Sometani

Release Date January 14th, 2022 

Belle left me a wreck by the time it was over. The movie about a young woman rediscovering her voice years after the death of her mother, hit me like a ton of bricks. Critics try to be as objective as possible but as someone who lost his mother 8 years ago, around the same timeframe that main character Suzu has suffered the death of her mother, my objectivity melted away in a sea of cathartic tears. Suzu’s journey does not resemble me in any other way and yet that shared grief is an unbreakable bond I have with this character. 

The main character of Belle is named Suzu. Suzu has been grieving the loss of her mother for nearly a decade and has retreated from life. Suzu gains a chance at a new life with the launch of a new fully interactive and physically immersive form of social media called U. U posits a technology that allows users to create a beautiful avatar and fully embody that avatar right down to physically being able to touch and feel things inside this virtual world.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Documentary Review A Cops and Robbers Story

A Cops and Robbers Story

Directed by Ilinca Calugareanu

Written by Documentary 

Starring Corey Pegues, Victoria N. Alcala

Release Date November 20th, 2020

When former New York Police Department Commander Corey Pegues went on the Combat Jack Podcast and opened up about his past as a gang member and drug dealer he created a firestorm. Amid such a frenzy it’s very easy for the truth to get lost in the hot takes, spin, and agendas of those eager to opine on controversial topics. That fact makes a documentary like A Cops and Robbers Story so valuable. This documentary lays bare the life of Corey Pegues in all of its complexity and controversy. 

Directed by Ilinca Calugareanu, A Cops and Robbers Story lays out the conflict of Corey Pegues in the opening moments. Pegues was a member of the NYPD and instructed officers regarding identifying known drug dealers and proper investigative technique. The bones of his presentation was a VHS tape and when he pressed play his heart nearly stopped. The video laid out the leadership of the famed New York street gang, The Supreme. In a talking head interview Pegues nervously recounts his reasonable concern that he himself might be listed in this chain of command.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review The Curse of La Patasola

The Curse of La Patasola 

Directed by A.J Jones

Written by A.J Jones, Shaun Mathis

Starring Patrick Walker, Luciana Faulhaber, Yvette Gonzalez-Nacer 

Release Date January 14th, 2022 

Some movies are just impossible to care about. They may have a scene or two that is pretty good or even a good idea or two in the storytelling and yet, they fail to engage your mind. The Curse of La Patasola is such a movie. Despite there being at least one legitimately good scene, the film from director A.J Jones never rises above mediocre to downright terrible. The low budget provides some excuses for the low rent nature but it can’t excuse the overall throwaway aspect of The Curse of La Patasola. 

The Curse of La Patasola stars Najah Bradley as Naomi, one of half of a pair of couples sharing a camping getaway. Both couples are struggling though they haven’t been talking about their problems. For Naomi, her boyfriend, James (Patrick R Walker), is too passive and doesn’t challenge her in the way she longs for. As for the other couple, Sarah and Daniel, played by Gillie Jones and director A.J Jones, they’re struggling with finances. Daniel has spent several years trying to get a business off the ground while Sarah has supported them both.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review The King's Daughter

The King's Daughter

Directed by Sean McNamara

Written by Perry Berman, James Schamus, Vonda N. McIntyre 

Starring Pierce Brosnan, Kaya Scodelario, William Hurt

Release Date January 21st, 2022

The King’s Daughter thrives on being the kind of movie Hollywood doesn’t seem to make anymore. It’s a family friendly, mid-budget, romantic adventure that earnestly evokes similar fare from the 80s and 90s. Blockbuster culture and the Marvel Movie Revolution had seemingly killed movies like The King’s Daughter but here we are. And, even more surprisingly, time has been kind to this genre. The King’s Daughter feels like a breath of fresh air at a time when the smog of blockbuster culture has held a chokehold on the big screen. 

The King’s Daughter stars the delightful Kaya Scoledario in the title role of The King’s Daughter, aka Mary Josephe, say it with a French accent so it doesn’t seem plain. Mary is a spirited child who believes she was an orphan because she grew up in a convent. Mary is unaware that when she was born her mother traveled to the convent to give birth in secret and unfortunately died in childbirth. Why did she decide to deliver in secret? Because the father was King Louis the 14th (Pierce Brosnan) and mom didn’t want him to know about the child if it wasn’t a male heir to the throne.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review Nocturna Side A/Side B

Nocturna Side A The Great Old Man's Night

Nocturna Side B Where Do Elephants Go to Die

Directed by Gonzalo Calzada

Written by Gonzalo Calzada

Starring Marina Artigas, Lautaro Delgado, Mora Dela Veccia

Release Date September 30th, 2021 

After watching Noctura Side A and Nocturna Side B, I sent a message to my Everyone’s a Critic Movie Review Podcast Co-Host, Bob Zerull, that indicated what I had watched and that I would have trouble sleeping that night. So haunting, engrossing, and agonizing is the Side A-Side B duo of Nocturna movies in their psychological horrors and soul aching sadness that I was unsure I was capable of sleep anymore. Nocturna Side A and Nocturna Side B are the kind of movies that etch themselves into your subconscious. 

Nocturna Side A subtitled The Great Old Man’s Night stars Pepe Soriano as Ulises, a 100 year old man living the last day of his life. It’s never stated for sure that this is the last day of Ulises life but, context clues, visual and aural, hint at the fact of Ulises approaching his final hours. A disembodied voice from an unseen television talks about dying elephants who develop the ability to see and communicate with dead ancestors as they themselves approach the final moments of life. How anyone would determine this about Elephants is unclear but it’s also not important.

Find my full length review at Horror.Media, linked here. 

Documentary Chari XCX Alone Together

Charli XCX Alone Together

Directed by Bradley Bell, Pablo Jones-Soler

Written by Documentary 

Starring Charli XCX 

Release Date January 28th, 2022 

I love fandoms. I love dedicated groups of people who take to an artist and their art and become a community. It’s an online phenomenon that did not exist when I was young and part of various fandoms. I am still a fan of many different artists and their work but I’ve never been part of a fandom and I envy those who have that connection and are able to share their love of pop ephemera with other like-minded people. I’m happy when I see a group of people who get along and are able to find a space to share their dedication to something. 

The new documentary Charli XCX Alone Together is about a pop star coping with the pandemic, the lockdowns, and all that came with the start of COVID-19’s hold on the country. Part of how that pop star, Charli XCX coped with the pandemic and shelter at home was further embracing her fandom, bringing her biggest fans even closer to her via virtual hangouts on Zoom, Tweeting and interacting on social media, and eventually deciding to make an album that was fully part of her online community, one that could organically be attributed to her fans who contributed lyrics, ideas, art and support.

Find my full length review at Beat.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review Cyrano

Cyrano

Directed by Joe Wright

Written by Erica Schmidt, Edmond Rostand

Starring Peter Dinklage, Haley Bennett, Kelvin Harrison

Release Date February 25th, 2022

Cyrano stars Peter Dinklage as Cyrano De Bergerac, legendary swordsman, soldier and wordsmith. Set in France in the 1600s, Cyrano finds our hero pining for his oldest friend, Roxanne (Haley Bennett) while she pines for a newly arrived soldier in Cyrano’s regiment. Christian De Neuvillette (Kelvin Harrison Jr) is a wide eyed new recruit who spots Roxanne in a crowd at the theater and shares a long romantic glance that each mistake for love at first sight. So powerful is this look that Roxanne arranges to meet with Cyrano to ask her friend to arrange their romance. 

Though it pains him to do it, Cyrano begins to coach Christian on how to woo Roxanne. However, when Christian proves to be foolish with words, Cyrano begins writing love letters on his behalf. The letters are filled with passionate prose dedicated to feelings for Roxanne that go well beyond the kind of first love fascination one has at first sight. Nevertheless, the letters work and Roxanne begins to believe that she has fallen in love with Christian through his passionate letters, even after their first in-person meeting goes horribly.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review Beyond the Infinite Two Minutes

Beyond the Infinite Two Minutes

Directed by Junta Yamaguchi

Written by Makato Ueda

Starring Kazunari Tosa, Riko Fujitani, Gota Ishida 

Release Date June 5th, 2020 

Beyond the Infinite Two Minutes is one of the most fun movies I have seen recently. This delightfully oddball science fiction comedy from Japan has a brilliantly odd premise, lovable characters and a wildly inventive spirit that permeates each of its delightfully short 70 minute runtime. Directed by Junta Yamaguchi, who also acted as his own cinematographer and editor, Beyond the Infinite Two Minutes isn’t merely entertaining, it’s a marvel of film technique, especially in the incredible editing. 

Beyond the Infinite Two Minutes stars Kazunari Tosa as Kato, the owner of a small cafe in Japan. One night after closing, Kato returns to his apartment, upstairs from the café, and has a bizarre encounter. While searching for a lost guitar pick, Kato gets a message from himself from two minutes in the future. He explains to himself how to find the pick and then tells himself to run down to the café so that he can send this same message to himself two minutes later. Kato listens to himself and a loop begins where everything Kato does repeats two minutes later.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review They/Them/Us

They/Them/Us 

Directed by Jon Sherman 

Written by Melissa Vogley Woods, Jon Sherman

Starring Joey Slotnick, Amy Hargreaves, Jack Steiner

Release Date February 1st, 2022 

They/ Them/Us is a modern sitcom crossed with Fifty Shades of Grey. Though the movie has some minor charm it lacks anything to truly make it special. They/Them/Us is another in a surprising yet slow growing trend of sex positive movies that have the appeal of not shaming people over their sexuality but the film also carries the tone deaf quality of a woke dad, trying way too hard to show the kids how cool he is. 

They/Them/Us stars Joey Slotnick as Charlie Goldman, a college film professor recently separated from his wife. Charlie is getting back out into the dating world while also trying to co-parent a pair of obnoxious teenagers eager to blame their parents for every minor inconvenience in their life. For Charlie’s son, Danny (Jack Steiner), that means getting heavily into drugs, first marijuana and then psychedelics. For Danny’s sister, Anna (Shanna Strong) that means complaining that no one is doing anything about Danny.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Documentary Review Poly Styrene I Am a Cliche

Poly Styrene  I Am a Cliche 

Directed by Celeste Bell, Paul Sng 

Written by Documentary 

Starring Celeste Bell

Release Date March 5th, 2021

If you aren’t a fan of the British punk rock wave of the late 70s and early 1980s then you may not be aware of the trailblazer known as Poly Styrene. Poly Styrene was the rebellious and distinctive voice of the punk band X-Ray Spex. The band is arguably best known for being banned by the BBC over their song “Oh Bondage, Up Yours,” an anti-authority, anti-patriarchy punk anthem that became a big hit in spite of and because of the BBC ban. 

Poly Styrene was a mixed race teenager growing up in a London suburb with few dreams of becoming a punk rock pioneer. Forming a band was an idea she had while writing poetry and searching for a way to share her poetry. Turning her spiky poetry into songs was a natural extension of wanting a way to speak louder and get heard. Punk was the most influential genre of the time and it happened to perfectly fit Poly’s anarchic style of poetry.

Find my full length review at Beat.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review The Long Night

The Long Night

Directed by Rich Ragsdale 

Written by Mark Young, Robert Sheppe

Starring Scout Taylor Compton, Nolan Gerard Funk

Release Date April 8th, 2022

The Long Night is a remarkably dull and derivative horror movie. This story about a couple trapped in a southern plantation home by some form of powerful demonic cult paints itself into multiple corners that it has no hope of getting out of. The villains have too much power and our protagonists are a bickering couple who have zero chemistry. So that’s fun. Then the movie builds to an ending that features character motivations that shift so fast you may get whiplash trying to keep up with the silliness. 

The Long Night stars Scout Taylor Compton as Grace and Nolan Gerard Funk as her obnoxious boyfriend. While bickering over how bad her introduction to his parents was, a scene that happened off screen, the two travel to the deep south. The plan has the couple going to a southern plantation where the owner has offered to help Grace find information on the parents she never knew; they abandoned her when she was very young.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review The Wolf and the Lion

The Wolf and the Lion 

Directed by Giles De Maistre 

Written by Prune De Maistre, Giles De Maistre

Starring Molly Kunz, Graham Greene

Release Date February 4th, 2022

The Wolf and the Lion is a harmless trifle, a modestly charming family movie with zero edge and occasionally baffling continuity. The heart of the filmmakers is mostly in the right place but you can sense the marketing strings being pulled and tears being jerked with excessive force. Based on the true story of a real life friendship between a baby wolf and baby tiger who grew up together on a Canadian island, The Wolf and the Lion is inelegant but harmless. 

The Wolf and the Lion stars Molly Kunz as Alma, a piano prodigy dealing with the loss of a beloved family member. Alma’s kooky granddad owns an island on the coast of Canada where he worked to protect local wildlife from hunters and other human incursions. Granddad passed away and has left his island to his granddaughter in hope that she will keep up his conservation efforts for the local wildlife.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review Worst to First The Story of Z100

Worst to First The Story of Z100 

Directed by Mitchell Stuart

Written by Mitchell Stuart 

Starring Clive Davis, Jon Bon Jovi, Scott Shannon

Release Date February 11th, 2022

In May of 2022 I will have been in radio for 27 years. Naturally, that means I know and revere Scott Shannon as a legend of my business. I’ve had the privilege of hearing Scott Shannon talk about radio in interviews and in person and it never gets old. The man is an indefatigable proponent of my profession since before I was even born. So, you can imagine that when I heard someone was making a documentary about Scott Shannon’s greatest accomplishment, taking New York’s Z100 from worst in the ratings to first, I was excited. 

That excitement lasted about a minute before disillusionment set in. Looking as if it had been shot on an IPhone on a budget of fifty bucks, the documentary Worst to First: The True Story of Z100 in New York is a dull, fawning, and unremarkable documentary. Opening with a story from Jon Bon Jovi, Worst to First opens with a non-sequitur. The rock legend tells a story about hearing one of his songs on the radio for the first time and what that meant to him.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review Air Doll

Air Doll 

Directed by Hirokazu Koreeda

Written by Yoshiie Goda, Hirokazu Koreeda

Starring Bae Doona, Arata Iura

Release Date September 26th, 2009

The movie Air Doll was originally released in 2009 and it flew completely under my radar. Thankfully, our friends at Dekanalog have rescued this lovely, thoughtful and thoroughly strange melodrama about a blow up sex doll that comes to life. That sounds a little like an inverse take on Lars and the Real Girl and the movies do carry a similar sense of whimsical melancholy. Air Doll is far more absurdist than the sweet Lars but if you liked one you may enjoy the other. 

Air Doll stars Bae Doon as Nozomi. Nozomi is the name given to the blow up sex doll belonging to Hideo (Isuji Itao) and it is a name she keeps when she finds a heart. That’s Nozomi’s narrated explanation of how she came to life, she found a heart. That heart leads Nozomi to venture outside, even as her only clothes are fetish costumes bought by Hideo. Nozomi chooses a sexy maid costume and ventures out into the world.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review Moonfall

Moonfall 

Directed by Roland Emmerich

Written by Roland Emmerich, Harold Kloser, Spencer Cohen 

Starring Patrick Wilson, Halle Berry, John Bradley 

Release Date February 4th, 2022 

Moonfall stars the charisma vacuum that is Patrick Wilson, continuing in his astonishing magic trick, fooling the world into seeing him as a movie star. Wilson plays a NASA astronaut, Brian, who, while debating the lyrics of the song Africa by Toto, because random counts as a personality in a movie like Moonfall, sees a massive alien destroy the satellite he’s working on, killing a fellow astronaut. 

Through the necessity of the plot, Brian’s best pal back in the ship, Jo (Halle Berry), was knocked unconscious and did not see the alien Brian claims destroyed the satellite. Brian manages to fly the damaged ship back to Earth but is blamed for the failure of the mission and is left disgraced and broke. This is so he can needlessly play the cliché of someone whose bills all have final notice on them and lay face up on a table in place of an actual character. Jo meanwhile goes on to become the head of NASA and if you want her to have any more personality than simple competence, too bad.

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media, linked here. 

Movie Review Cosmic Dawn

Cosmic Dawn 

Directed by Jefferson Moneo

Written by Jefferson Moneo

Starring Camille Rowe, Emmanuelle Chriqui 

Release Date February 11th, 2022

Cosmic Dawn stars Camille Rowe as Aurora. As a child Aurora witnessed her mother being abducted by aliens. She was 5 years old when it happened but her memories are still vivid. Regardless of her account however, people chalk up the alien story to having been traumatized by her mother’s disappearance. Aurora grows up a lost soul always searching for something she can’t quite wrap her mind around. 

Then one night after a rave party, Aurora finds herself drawn by the presence of an older woman to enter a bookstore. Once inside however, Aurora finds that the woman has vanished. The store clerk, Natalie (Emmanuelle Chiriqui), finds Aurora searching for the woman she saw in the supernatural section. While Aurora takes interest in a book about alien abduction, Natalie steers her toward a different book called Cosmic Dawn. A photo of the author reveals that she is the older woman that Aurora followed into the store.

Find my full length review at Futurism.Media, linked here.