Movie Review J Edgar

J. Edgar (2011)

Directed by Clint Eastwood

Written by Dustin Lance Black

Starring Leonardo DiCaprio, Armie Hammer, Naomi Watts, Josh Lucas, Judi Dench 

Release Date November 9th, 2011 

Published November 7th, 2011

J. Edgar Hoover's place in American history is remarkable. From the 1919 Anarchist Bombings to the Lindbergh baby to every famous gangster taken down by arrest or death, Hoover was there. When John F. Kennedy was killed; it was Hoover who informed Bobby Kennedy of the President's death with a terse phone call.

Hoover's place in American history is unquestionable regardless of his unethical, even treasonous acts. J. Edgar Hoover is a towering figure casting a shadow across the 20th century that touched everything from Al Capone to the Cold War to Kennedy's assassination to the beginning of Nixon's downfall.

A Fitting Tribute

The movie "J. Edgar," directed by Clint Eastwood and starring Leonardo DiCaprio, is a fitting tribute to the man. J. Edgar captures the best and the worst of the man who coined the phrase G-Man and revolutionized law enforcement while becoming infamous for his abuse of power and his private struggles with his sexuality.

The story of J. Edgar begins with an elderly J. Edgar Hoover (DiCaprio) dictating his memoirs. We begin with the origins of the Red Scare, the 1919 Anarchist Bombings. Hoover, at the behest of the Attorney General, a target of an assassins in the bombings, giving Hoover the authority to investigate the bombings with new, broader law enforcement powers.

Anarchist Bombings Raid

The Hoover led raid on a suspected communist labor headquarters was a debacle. While it could be proven that leaflets found at the scene of the bombing of the Attorney General's home were printed in this location there was no evidence that the people inside the supposed communist outpost had taken part in acts of terror.

Everyone, aside from Hoover, including the Attorney General lost their jobs because of the raid Hoover organized. With the infrastructure of the then Bureau of Investigations, the Federal moniker would be added later, and the job of director fell to Hoover as the last man standing. He would stay in the position for more than 40 years.

Three Important People

In his time as the head of the FBI J. Edgar Hoover had only three people close to him, his mother (Judi Dench), his secretary for 40+ years, Helen Gandy (Naomi Watts) and Hoover's right hand man, Clyde Tolson (Armie Hammer). The relationship between Hoover and Tolson has been the topic of great conjecture for many years.

The movie "J. Edgar" treats the romance between J. Edgar Hoover and Clyde Tolson with respect and care. Keeping in mind the times in which these men lived, a repressed era when homosexuals faced grave persecution, it makes sense that the relationship is very reserved. That said, "J. Edgar" is not without passion as DiCaprio and Armie Hammer demonstrate remarkable chemistry.

Private Punchline

J.Edgar Hoover's private life has been a punch line for many years. That's because while going out his way to use rumor and innuendo about alternative lifestyles in order to blackmail and manipulate other powerful individuals, it's a karmic comeuppance that Hoover's own private life becomes fodder for ridicule.

That said, director Clint Eastwood and screenwriter Dustin Lance Black treat Hoover's cross-dressing and homosexuality with grace and caring. In fact, it may be Eastwood's considerable tenderness in treating Hoover, making him something of a tragic victim of his time, which may be bothering people the most about "J. Edgar."

A Remarkable, Oscar Worthy Effort

Those who wish only to condemn Hoover's awful excesses will struggle with the moments in "J.Edgar" when Hoover is treated with respect and care and even rendered sympathetic. No man or woman is defined in a single way; there are always degrees and shades. Most of J. Edgar Hoover's life was spent on the wrong path but other parts of his life are worthy of a fair revision.

"J. Edgar" is a remarkable film. Clint Eastwood's direction is artful and studied while Leonardo DiCaprio's performance is layered with sadness, strength and a compelling will. The Academy Awards season has begun and "J. Edgar" is one film highly likely to make an impact on Hollywood's biggest night.

Documentary Review Jig The Story of the Irish Dancing World Championships

Jig The Story of the Irish Dancing World Championships (2011) 

Directed by Sue Bourne 

Written by Documentary 

Starring Brogan McCay, Julia O'Rourke 

Release Date June 19th, 2011

July 14th, 2011

Jig: The Story of the Irish Dancing World Championships" is an inside look at Irish Dancing and like nothing you have seen before. Director Sue Bourne goes beyond "Riverdance" and "Lord of the Dance" and into the real, day to day lives of competitors and their families whose quirks, obsessions and intense dedication to their craft are as compelling as the prize they compete for is surprising.

Brogan and Julia

First, we meet 10 year old Brogan McCay from Derry, Northern Ireland. A lively and precocious youngster, Brogan is already a champion in Irish Dancing when we meet her for the first time. With her instructors Rosetta and Elizabeth, who storm about in tracksuits and bark instructions ala "Glee's" Sue Sylvester, Brogan is preparing for the 40th Irish Dancing World Championship where her top competition will be Julia O'Rourke from New York City.

Julia, the daughter of an Irish father and Asian mother, has long idolized Brogan having watched her competition videos on YouTube and copied her steps. Together, Brogan and Julia offer the most compelling and dramatic of all of the tremendous stories in this highly compelling documentary.

Eye on the Prize?

However, Jig is more than cute little girls in sparkly costumes performing extraordinary Irish Dances. Director Sue Bourne juxtaposes Brogan and Julia's story with those of older, teenage competitors, Claire, Simona and Suzanne and through them we see what may be a glimpse into Brogan and Julia's future, a future filled with obsessive dedication to dance that consumes not just the competitors but their families.

All of the obsessive, day to day, practice and all consuming dedication to perfecting routines grow even more fascinating when you find out that these girls and each of the more than 3000 people who compete in the Irish Dancing World Championships are not competing for prize money and that the judging of the event is wholly subjective, based on the tastes of the judges and not on any specific criteria.

Dedication and Obsession

Sue Bourne's approach glosses over the lack of prize money and shows little interest in the judges and their tastes. Instead, she is focused on these extraordinary young people and parents who have dedicated their lives to Irish Dancing purely out of the love of doing it including several Russian women who paid thousands for a world class coach after stumbling upon Irish Dancing almost by accident.

Then there is little John, a nine year old boy who endures the taunts of other boys who spend their time playing soccer while John practices his steps. Though John's love of Irish Dancing is obvious, you cannot help but be a little sad as you watch John working out his steps while watching other kids play. John later joins the game, softening the sad perspective but only a little.

Awe inspiring talent

John's idol is Joe; an American born in California whose parents gave up everything to move to Glasgow so Joe could be trained by world class Irish Dancer John Carey. Joe is a multiple time champion whose work is indeed remarkable but you cannot help but be astonished at how willing his parents were to trade in life in California to pursue a goal for their son that has no prize beyond personal pride and a gold plated trophy.

"Jig: The Story of the Irish Dancing World Championships" is a fascinating documentary about remarkable people doing something truly extraordinary and the awesome lengths they go to in order to achieve their goals. The story is informative, the dancing is awe inspiring at times, especially Joe, and in the end there is even some tense drama surrounding the results.

All of the elements come together to make Jig a must see when it opens Friday, June 17th, in limited release and whenever it arrives in your neck of the woods.

Movie Review Arthur

Arthur (2011) 

Directed by Jason Winer

Written by Peter Baynham 

Starring Russell Brand, Jennifer Garner, Helen Mirren, Greta Gerwig, Nick Nolte 

Release Date April 8th, 2011 

Published April 8th, 2011 

There was no urgent need to remake the 1981 comedy classic "Arthur." The legendary Dudley Moore had brought to the role of millionaire alcoholic Arthur Bach all of the assets that could be brought to it. While, the original did suffer a bit for the abominable sequel "Arthur 2: On the Rocks" that alone doesn't justify attempting a new spin on the original.

Nevertheless, we have an "Arthur" remake in theaters and starring comedian turned actor Russell Brand as the alcoholic, man-child, millionaire Arthur Bach. Brand is well suited for the role being both English, as Dudley Moore was, and having a history of alcohol abuse on which to draw a great deal of inspiration. That doesn't justify the remake but Brand does make it all quite pleasant.

Russell Brand is 'Arthur'

Arthur Bach (Russell Brand) is undoubtedly an overgrown child. When we meet Arthur for the first time he is dressed as Batman and planning to attend a black tie function being put on by his mother, Vivian (Geraldine James), arriving in the Batmobile alongside his driver and friend Bitterman (Luis Guzman), dressed as the Boy Wonder.

If you find this scenario charming then you are just the audience for "Arthur" a comedy that will repeatedly reinforce Russell Brand's man-child qualities through nerd culture signifiers. Later we will see what Arthur says is the original Darth Vader helmet among other pop culture ephemera that Brand's multi-millionaire character obtains throughout the film in order to remind fans of better movies, earning the good feelings by proxy.

A marriage of convenience

Arthur may be 30 years old but he is still cared for by his childhood nanny Hobson (Dame Helen Mirren), something he justifies by referring to her as his best friend. Hobson is supportive but mostly disdainful of Arthur's wasted life of whores and copious amounts of alcohol. Hobson is, for a short time, surprisingly in favor of seeing Arthur marry Susan Johnson (Jennifer Garner), a marriage Arthur sorely hopes to avoid.

Arthur has been instructed to marry Susan by his mother or he will be cut off from the family fortune. Susan's father (Nick Nolte) threatens to cut off something else entirely should Arthur not go through with the marriage. Arthur seems headed down the aisle until he meets Naomi (Greta Gerwig) an unlicensed tour guide and aspiring children's book author. They fall for each other immediately but will Arthur give up his fortune for love?

Charming, sarcastic and sugary sweet

Russell Brand charms his way through much of "Arthur" with well timed quips and lighthearted insults. It's a fun and funny performance well matched with Dame Helen Mirren's sturdy and often wearyingly sarcastic Hobson and Greta Gerwig's sugar sweet Naomi. But, these fabulously pleasant performances don't excuse "Arthur's" lack of necessity.

There simply remains no reason to have done a remake of "Arthur." I like Russell Brand and the rest of the cast but each could be doing something more original and constructive instead of going through the motions of someone else's comedy legend. Director Jason Winer and writer Peter Baynham offer too little that is new here and what little new there is doesn't make this "Arthur" relevant or unique.

Worth seeing for Russell Brand fans

If you have seen the trailers or commercials for "Arthur" and thought that you'd like to see it then I encourage you to go. You are likely a fan of Russell Brand and his work here is solid. If you are on the fence however, there is nothing in "Arthur" that screams must see.

Wait for the DVD and you will likely be just as satisfied. Or, you could rent the Dudley Moore original and be so delighted that you forget the remake entirely.

Movie Review: Cowboys and Aliens

Cowboys and Aliens (2011) 

Directed by Jon Favreau

Written by Roberto Orci, Alex Kurtzman, Damon Lindelof, Mark Fergus, Hawk Ostby

Starring Daniel Craig, Harrison Ford, Olivia Wilde, Sam Rockwell, Adam Beach, Paul Dano

Release Date July 29th, 2011

Published July 28th, 2011

Why isn't Cowboys and Aliens the biggest event in popular culture ever? With the elements that the film has in place there is simply no excuse for this film to not be the biggest moment in pop culture, at least in this short century. Consider that we are talking about the combination of two of the most popular genres ever, western and science fiction. And that the film stars both James Bond (Daniel Craig) and Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford), not to mention Han Solo and Jack Ryan.

How about the fact that Cowboys and Aliens was produced by a Hollywood dream team that includes Ron Howard, Brian Grazer and Steven Speilberg. To top it all off, this geek god of a movie was directed by the director of Iron Man 1 & 2--himself a cult figure for his role in Swingers--Jon Favreau. I ask again: Why isn't Cowboys and Aliens the biggest pop culture event ever?

Somewhere in the old west a man who doesn't yet know that his name is Jake Lonergan (Daniel Craig) awakens in the desert. His memory is gone, he's wounded and he has some sort of device strapped to his wrist. Eventually, Jake makes his way to the town of Absolution where everyone is under the boot of Col. Woodrow Dolarhyde (Harrison Ford).

Unknown to Jake, he and Dolarhyde have a history; Jake robbed a stagecoach full of Dolarhyde's gold before his memory loss and subsequent desert awakening. Before Dolarhyde and Jake can have it out however, an alien spaceship attacks and begins kidnapping townsfolk. Suddenly, Jake's new jewelry comes to life and he's able to destroy one of the alien ships.

Now, Jake and Dolarhyde must team up with a posse that includes a little kid, a dog and a woman, Ella (Olivia Wilde) along with a preacher (Clancy Brown), a saloon owner (Sam Rockwell) and several random posse members who act as cannon fodder for subsequent alien attacks. Together this disparate band must traverse the desert, find the alien HQ and get their people back.

Cowboys and Aliens was adapted from a graphic novel by Scott Mitchell Rosenberg though how much of his original story remains is anyone's guess. At least six different writers have credits on the screenplay of Cowboys and Aliens including Lost co-creator Damon Lindelof, the Star Trek reboot team of Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman, The Simpsons staff writer Bill Oedenkirk and the Iron Man team of Mark Fergus and Hawk Ostby.

Wrestling these different visions into one mostly cohesive whole is director Jon Favreau who does pull off the Herculean task of making Cowboys and Aliens a believable combination of old school western and high end sci-fi while wrangling this wild horse of script into one well told story. Unfortunately, what is lost in the mix is a sense of humor as well of a sense of the film's place in popular culture.

For some reason, Jon Favreau wants us to take Cowboys and Aliens seriously. Both stars, Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford, deliver taciturn, old west tough guy performances that feel authentic but lack the awe, wonderment and humor that this goofy sci-fi story calls for. The film needed a Will Smith injection; a character who we can believe will hold up in a fight and yet has the aplomb to be impressed by the situation he finds himself in.

Cowboys and Aliens also suffers from a lack of cultural awareness; director Favreau wants to pretend that he is making an old school western that happens to have aliens. Favreau also wants to pretend that his stars are not weighted by pop culture history; why else has the film's marketing failed to mention that one of the stars is James Bond and the other is Indiana Jones?

You simply cannot cast Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford and not find some way to pay homage to their place in the culture. This head in the sand approach blunts the impact of everything they do in the film. We in the audience crave the release of having someone reference how huge all of this is and no one does. This is where the lack of a sense of humor comes into play; a sense of humor would find some way to make a joke about spies or the territory of Indiana, or an offhand reference to something about a Star War.

That however, would not have played into Jon Favreau's misguided choice to play the material of Cowboys and Aliens as a straight western that happens to have aliens attacking. On its own merits Cowboys and Aliens is well crafted, a little fat in the run time at over two hours, but solidly built aside from its lack of humor. Matthew Libatique's cinematography is terrific, the special effects are eye catching and believable, the film simply lacks the proper amount of awe.

In the end, if Jon Favreau did not want the weight of pop culture on his old school, John Ford Western that happens to have Aliens, he shouldn't have cast James Bond and Indiana Jones. Favreau set the pop culture table and then refused to serve it and that leaves Cowboys and Aliens a well made but slightly bland feast.

Movie Review The Change Up

The Change Up (2011) 

Directed by David Dobkin 

Written by Jon Lucas, Scott Moore

Starring Jason Bateman, Ryan Reynolds, Leslie Mann, Olivia Wilde

Release Date August 5th, 2011

Published August 5th, 2011 

Body switching comedies were all the rage in the 1980's. Back then George Burns became Charlie Schlatter, Judge Reinhold became Fred Savage and Dudley Moore became Kirk Cameron. Why anyone would think they could improve out on that genre gold is beyond me and yet, we have The Change Up in which Ryan Reynolds become Jason Bateman and vice versa.

Dave (Bateman) is a family man who's grown tired of his routine of diaper changes and no sex with his beautiful wife Jamie (Leslie Mann). Mitch (Reynolds) is an overgrown child who sleeps with any woman who looks at him and spends his days getting high when he isn't acting in softcore porn movies.

When the two life long friends get together for a beer and a game they end up confessing how they envy each other's lives. Unfortunately, they happen to be urinating in a magic fountain when they make their mutual confessions and the next morning they wake up with their bodies switched.

Now, Dave has to pray Mitch can go do his job at his law firm well enough to secure his promotion to partner while not neglecting his life at home with Jamie and their three kids including twin babies. Mitch, meanwhile, has nothing whatsoever at stake for Dave to screw up save for his regular Tuesday night sex-fest which Dave refuses to honor for reasons that you must experience for yourself.

The Change Up was directed by David Dobkin the director of The Wedding Crashers, a film that brought a little bit of heart to a very R-rated premise. Dobkin attempts to bring the same amount of heart and low brow humor to The Change Up but it simply doesn't work; Jason Bateman and Ryan Reynolds lack the magical chemistry of Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson.

The problem is the character of Mitch who is such an unredeemable dirtbag he makes it impossible to care about his story arc. We are invited to empathize with him but we are never given a good reason to actually offer that empathy. It's hard to feel sorry for a guy whose biggest problem is a bad relationship with his father; played by Alan Arkin, a bad relationship that is clearly his own fault.

The R-Rated gags of The Change Up are kind of funny here and there; especially funny is Reynolds who finds himself in the worst possible situations with women. After the body switch poor Dave has to avoid cheating on his wife with one of Mitch's women and has to fight off sex with Olivia Wilde, which is a Herculean task.

I'm not going to tell you that The Change Up isn't funny; there are a number of big laughs spread throughout the film. The problem is a story that requires you to sympathize with a character, Mitch, who is not sympathetic and who, when played by Bateman, is an idiot and a jerk without being a funny idiot jerk.

Movie Review: Albert Nobbs

Albert Nobbs (2011) 

Directed by Rodrigo Garcia 

Written by Glenn Close, John Banville, Gabrielle Prekop

Starring Glenn Close, Mia Wasikowska, Janet McTeer, Jonathan Rhys Meyers

Release Date September 2nd, 2011

Published November 14th, 2011

"Albert Nobbs" suffers from novelty. The film about a woman pretending to be a man in 19th century England cannot escape the novelty of star Glenn Close dressed as a man. Close's soft features and fragile demeanor betray her at every turn even as her Albert is a very sympathetic creation.

Albert Nobbs has lived for many years at the Morrison Inn where he's worked diligently as a butler. Scrimping every shilling Albert has saved up quite a nest egg; possibly enough to buy his own tobaccos shop and possibly even enough to live the life of his choice.

Albert is a woman pretending to be a man in order to find work and acceptance. As a child Albert was often abused and was to be left out on the streets after her foster mother passed away. Albert found a way out from under her abuse and poverty by dressing as a man and taking a job as a butler.

That was many years ago. Now, Albert is a respected; if somewhat odd, middle aged man living quietly at the Morrison in silent longing. Albert's secret is nearly revealed when he/she is forced to share his bed with a day laborer named Hubert (Janet McTeer).

In another of "Albert Nobbs" less than convincing visual portrayals, Janet McTeer plays Hubert and, like Ms. Close, Ms. McTeer's features betray her. Add that to the contrivance of two women pretending to be men stumbling upon each other in this way and "Albert Nobbs" begin to seem silly.

What keeps "Albert Nobbs" from becoming ridiculous is the complete commitment of both Glenn Close and Janet McTeer to their characters. While the movie seems to almost attempt to embarrass them, these tremendous actresses maintain their dignity and are never less than sympathetic.

Unfortunately, "Albert Nobbs" suffers for the novelty of Close and McTeer's less than convincing looking drag act as well as a lack of discernible purpose. For the life of me I cannot understand what "Albert Nobbs" was about.

Often times a director will excuse a lack of purpose by calling a film a 'character study;' "Albert Nobbs" is unquestionably that. However, the cop out of a character study is that it allows the filmmakers to not have to craft a compelling story but merely turn out characters who are strong enough to hold the audience's attention.

The characters of "Albert Nobbs" are unquestionably interesting, including the lovely Mia Wasikowska as the object of Albert's affections, Aaron Johnson ("Kick Ass") as Wasikowska's lover and Brendon Gleeson as a friendly, drunken doctor.

I mentioned Wasikowska as the object of Albert's affections. Here the film is unnecessarily coy about Albert's sexuality. Is Albert a lesbian? Does Albert know what it means to be a lesbian? McTeer's Hubert is married to a woman but her sexuality is vague as well; she was married to an abusive husband before stealing his clothes and becoming a man.

I understand wanting the audience to draw their own conclusions about these issues. I also understand that sexuality wasn't as well defined by sub-culture as it is in America in 2011. That said, the film is so vague and so coy that our ability to draw conclusions is nearly comically derailed. Glenn Close delivers a well-considered performance in "Albert Nobbs" but there are simply too many issues surrounding the performance for me to recommend "Albert Nobbs."

Essay: Amanda Knox is Innocent and Lifetime is Irresponsible - 2011

The Amanda Knox Story (2011) 

Directed by Robert Dornhelm

Written by Wendy Battles 

Starring Hayden Panattiere, Marcia Gay Harden, Vincent Riotta 

Release Date February 21st, 2011 

Published February 21st, 2011

Lifetime debuts their Movie of the Week "The Amanda Knox Story" an allegedly fact based drama on the case of an American student charged with the murder of her British born roommate while they lived in Perugia, Italy. While this type of ripped from the headlines melodrama is par for the Lifetime, movie of the week course, the network is irresponsibly cashing in on this story at a crucial moment in the real life of Amanda Knox.

In November of 2007 the body of Meredith Kercher was found, throat slit and stabbed multiple times on the floor of her bedroom in a student apartment in Perugia, Italy. The natural suspects in this case would be her roommate and the various people who made their way into the apartment, friends, boyfriends, aquaintances.

The suspect that emerged immediately for Italian prosecutors was Meredith's roommate Amanda Knox, a 20 year old from Seattle living it up in Italy. With her Italian boyfriend Raffaele Sollecito, Knox did herself no favors in the wake of Meredith's death allowing little quirky behavior and an inconsistent alibi to cast a suspicious pall over her.

While Amanda's actions fairly brought some suspicion upon her the physical evidence of the case and especially the forensic evidence demonstrate Knox's innocence. Knox's fingerprints nor footprints were found in Kercher's bedroom. DNA, blood, footprints, and fingerprints, of a third suspect, Rudy Guede were found at the scene while peripheral evidence, such as a kitchen knife from Knox's apartment was found at Sollecito's apartment; leading prosecutors believe the knife was being hidden.

Regardless of the physical evidence Amanda Knox was found guilty by a corrupt Italian justice system which used the media to sell their case. Prosecutors tainted the jury pool by framing Knox as a loose party girl who, with her glamorous Italian boyfriend, murdered Kercher in sex games gone wrong. They released videos showing Knox's admittedly callous seeming reaction to Kercher's death while a conspiratorial media latched on to the sordid elements of the story with the intent of selling papers. 

Now the Lifetime cable network is weighing in with "The Amanda Knox Story." Starring Heroes star Hayden Panattiere, "The Amanda Knox Story" is an allegedly fact based recounting of Knox's murder trial that until recently featured a graphic recreation of Kercher's murder as prosecutors claimed it happened. 

This malicious and irresponsible film, which I have not seen, comes at a time when Knox's appeal is about to be heard in an Italian court. The timing could not be worse as the media was used in the original trial to manipulate jurors, potential retrial jurors will be exposed to "The Amanda Knox Story" which is based on court records from a case that sketchy throughout and media accounts which were malicious, salacious and prejudicial. 

Meanwhile, the makers and stars of "The Amanda Knox Story" continue to make claims of objectivity and fairness. For her part, star Hayden Panattiere refused to meet Amanda Knox and tells interviewers that she goes back and forth about whether she believes Knox was guilty of the murder, ignoring the exculpatory forensic evidence. 

How exactly can a movie of the week based on the court records of a botched murder trial and prejudicial media reports claim objectivity and pretend to be unbiased. The facts are that merely bringing to life the murder of Meredith Kercher, as this movie did until it was edited out just prior to air, makes the film biased. It sets the scene and creates the false memory of Knox as a murderer and physically dramatizes what was until now merely a story crafted by prosecutors. 

The level of irresponsibility on the part of Lifetime is off the charts. The network could have, at the very least, waited a few months until the completion of the appeal to try to cash in on the death of Meredith Kercher and the destruction of the young life of the wrongly accused Amanda Knox. Sadly, restraint in the face of profits is not the strong suit of a modern American corporation. 

Lifetime should be ashamed. The life of Amanda Knox hangs in the balance as they weigh their balance sheets.

Movie Review: Zookeeper

Zookeeper (2011) 

Directed by Frank Coraci

Written by Nick Bakay, Rock Reuben, Kevin James, Jay Sherick, David Ronn

Starring Kevin James, Sylvester Stallone, Rosario Dawson, Leslie Bibb, Nick Nolte, Cher

Release Date July 8th, 2011

Published July 7th, 2011

Kevin James is a big, lovable teddy bear of a guy who is hard not to root for. That appeal comes in handy in a movie like Zookeeper which indicates from its premise that critics should really hate it. The premise has James talking with zoo animals who give him advice about his love life. So... yeah, that's actually the premise. 

To be fair to my profession, the most recent examples of humans talking with animals include such dreadful films as Dr. Doolittle 1 & 2 with Eddie Murphy, a pair of Alvin & the Chipmunk debacles and Hop. History would seem to dictate that Zookeeper should be brutal. That it is far from brutal, indeed it's modestly enjoyable is quite something.

Hilarious Heartbreak

Griffin (James) is in love with Stephanie (Leslie Bibb) but unfortunately she can't love a modest zookeeper. Too bad she tells him this after he pops the question in an elaborate romantic gesture, a terrifically funny scene exceptionally well played by Kevin James who earns our sympathy right off the bat.

Cut to five years later and Griffin is thinking of leaving the zoo to work at his brother Dave's (Nat Faxon) exotic car shop. When the zoo animals get wind of their favorite zookeeper thinking of leaving the finally reveal that they can talk. The reveal on the animals talking is another great scene from James who reacts as someone likely should react when animals begin speaking to them only funnier.

Animals Can Talk

In order to convince Griffin to stay the zoo animals come up with a plan to teach him how to win Stephanie back. Again, you will be surprised how often you laugh during these scenes as James goes all out throwing himself into all sorts of physical gags as he works to make us laugh.

The animal voice cast includes Sylvester Stallone and Cher as Lions, Adam Sandler, doing one of his irritating voices as a monkey, Maya Rudolf as a giraffe and most surprisingly, Nick Nolte as TGIFriday's loving gorilla. Nolte is a wonderfully strange choice who infuses even the goofiest scene with unnecessary vocal gravitas.

If You Liked Paul Blart...

Zookeeper has no right to be as funny as it is but then again neither did Kevin James's last lead comic performance in Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Both films look dreadful on the surface but watching them, I was caught off guard by the number of times Kevin James made me laugh.

No other actor in Hollywood works harder to make an audience laugh. Most of the time when an actor desperately tries to make you laugh they fail, it's all too obvious and desperate. James however, brings sweetness to his desperation that makes him sympathetic.

Of course, Zookeeper is not going to win any Oscars and likely won't remember any of it in a couple days but while watching it I laughed a great deal more than I expected to. Kevin James is a funny, sweet and hard working guy that you just can't help but root for even as you wish he weren't in a talking animal movie.

Movie Review Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer

Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer (2011) 

Directed by John Schultz

Written by Megan McDonald, Kathy Waugh

Starring Heather Graham, Paris Mosteller, Preston Bailey, Jaleel White

Release Date June 10th, 2011 

Published June 11th, 2011

"Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer" arrives in theaters on Friday, June 10th and while author Megan McDonald, who originated the character Judy Moody in a series of Kid-Lit books in 2000, has a book out now of the same title, in a rare break with convention, the story of Not Bummer Summer was created specifically for the Judy's big screen debut.

Judy Moody The Movie

"Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer" stars newcomer Jordana Beatty as Judy Moody, a quirky pre-teen with big plans for a thrilling summer. Judy has devised a game for her friends that involves earning thrill points. But, when Judy's best pals each have to leave for the summer and Judy is suddenly left with her little brother Stink in the care of their unusual Aunt Opal (Heather Graham), Judy's summer looks like a bummer.

In 2009 producers with Smokewood Entertainment approached author Megan McDonald about bringing Judy Moody to the big screen. Many of the biggest movie studios in Hollywood chased the project but it was Smokewood that offered the most unique and daring opportunity for the author.

A Break from Convention

In an effort to stay true to the spirit of Judy Moody, Megan McDonald was offered the chance to author the screenplay herself with the aid of her longtime friend, and professional screenwriter, Kathy Waugh. Together, McDonald and Waugh launched a story that, in a break with Hollywood convention, was not a direct adaptation of an existing Judy Moody book but a new story that launched from the existing characters.

Producer Sarah Siegel Magness, who was producing the Oscar Nominated drama "Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire" when she obtained the rights to Judy Moody, says "We drew inspiration from the existing books without repeating actual storylines." That means that fans of the Judy Moody books are in for an entirely new Judy adventure on the big screen.

Heather Graham is Aunt Opal

Heather Graham co-stars in "Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer '' as Aunt Opal, a character that Judy Moody fans will get to know for the first time in Judy's first big screen adventure. Says author Megan McDonald of Aunt Opal, "We spent a good deal of time developing (Aunt Opal) and writing a whole backstory for Aunt Opal." "She's very artistic and a little bit outside the box but not wacky, she sparkles with energy."

Your Judy Moody Favorites

Aside from Aunt Opal, each of your favorite Judy Moody characters are back in '˜Not Bummer Summer' including Amy Namey (Taylar Hendar), Rocky (Garrett Ryan), Frank (Preston Bailey), Stink (Paris Mosteller) and Judy's favorite teacher, Mr. Todd (Jaleel White.)

Characters new and well known will enjoy a '˜Not Bummer Summer' in theaters nationwide Friday, June 10th.

Movie Review: Transformers Dark of the Moon

Transformers Dark of the Moon (2011) 

Directed by Michael Bay 

Written by Ehren Kruger 

Starring Shia LeBeouf, Rosie Huntington Whitley, Tyrese, Josh Duhamel, Patrick Dempsey, Frances McDormand, John Malkovich

Release Date June 29th, 2011

Published June 28th, 2011

To say that "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" is the best of the "Transformers" movies is indeed damning with faint praise. The first two "Transformers" films were brutal exercises in filmic excess. Michael Bay banged his metal toys together inches from our ears and eyes and somehow expected us to enjoy it.

For "Dark of the Moon" however, the slamming and banging is rather welcome; especially when it interrupts Bay's abysmal attempts at comedy. The special effects of "Dark of the Moon" have greatly improved from the first two films. The effects editing of "Dark of the Moon" is better, this time we can actually see some of the robot action that before was a blur of whizbang, MTV style, quick cuts.

Sure, the story of "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" remains an incomprehensible bunch of hooey but at least I can make out which robot is Optimus Prime.

Man on the Moon

"Dark of the Moon" picks up with a trip back in time to the original space race. An alien ship has crashed and landed on the moon and President Kennedy authorizes NASA to go find out what it can about this alien vessel. Eight years later, Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin arrive on the moon and discover the very first Autobot.

Cut to modern day and to our human hero, Sam Witwicky (Shia LeBeouf). Despite having helped save the world twice Sam can't find a job. He longs to work with his pals Bumblebee and Optimus Prime but for now has to settle for a job in the mail room of a defense contractor; John Malkovich plays the company's wacky CEO.

Meet Carly

Not all is bad for Sam however; he does have a new hot girlfriend, Carly (Rosie Huntington Whitely), who happens to have a great job that keeps them in luxury. Carly works for a venture capitalist named Dylan (Patrick Dempsey) who happens to have a posh car collection. That he also happens to be an evil consort of the Decepticons will only come clear later.

The plot, such as it is, has the evil Decepticons, led by Megatron, looking to use technology stolen from the crashed autobot ship on the moon to import what's left of Cybertron to earth, essentially turning earth into the new Cybertron and turning the humans into slaves.

Which Robot is Which? Do You Care?

You need not know any more than that as what is left is the aforementioned whooey. "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" is not about plot complications or characters; it's about giant robots pummeling each other. Quick question: Can you tell the Autobots from the Decepticons? Sub-question: Do you know the names of the individual Transformers?

I watched the cartoon as a child but for the life of me, I cannot tell any of the robots apart aside from Optimus Prime. There is a new robot added to the mix in Dark of the Moon, Sentinel Prime, and I could tell him apart from the others but only because of the commanding voice of Spock aka Leonard Nimoy.

Regardless of what robot is what, I could not stop myself from enjoying watching them rip each other apart. There is a moment when one robot rips another robots head off and the robot spine was still attached to the robot head; I couldn't hold back my giddiness. It sounds gruesome but they're robots so I don't feel bad for enjoying this glorious carnage.

Michael Bay, YOU'RE NOT FUNNY!

Sadly, Michael Bay keeps up his childish sense of humor in "Transformers: Dark of the Moon." While we settle in to enjoy robot on robot violence, Michael Bay cannot resist childish jokes about sex and sitcom level banter from Shia Le Beouf about his girlfriend troubles, job troubles and car troubles.

As mentioned earlier, John Malkovich shows up in Transformers: Dark of the Moon and when he shares screen time with John Turturro there is fear that the movie could turn into a classic vaudeville routine in which the performers trip and toss each other out of the way in order to take over center stage. This scenario sounds a great deal more fun than it is.

I'm a fan of Ken Jeong but what was he doing in this movie. Jeong plays a scientist with ties to the Decepticons but his real function is to be Ken Jeong and act all crazy. That was fun in the context of the "Hangover" movies, it's less fun in "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" because it feels forced and out place.

Opposing Ideas

Michael Bay has two opposing forces going at all times in Transformers: Dark of the Moon. At once he wants us to take somewhat seriously the notion of an alien battle that may end in the enslavement of all mankind. On the other hand, Bay wants us to laugh at his sophomoric, sitcom jokes. The tone simply never works and the two sides run together like an ugly, head on collision.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon could have been a pretty good movie without the human characters. I get why they are there, our emotional connection to the giant robots is relatively non-existent, but Bay and writer Ehren Kruger have made the human characters so outlandishly goofball that we don't have much emotional connection to them either.

Bottom Line

In the end, all I really wanted was some robot carnage that I could actually see. On that very basic level you could call Transformers: Dark of the Moon a success. Do I recommend the film for a general audience? Not really, you have to really like robots to enjoy Transformers: Dark of the Moon. This is not like Spiderman or Batman where the characters have an appeal beyond their actions.

Movie Review: Dylan Dog Dead of Night

Dylan Dog Dead of Night (2011) 

Directed by Kevin Munroe 

Written by Thomas Dean Donnelly, Joshua Oppenheimer

Starring Brandon Routh, Sam Huntington, Anita Briem, Peter Stormare, Taye Diggs 

Release Date April 29th, 2011

Published April 30th, 2011

Detective Dylan Dog (Brandon Routh) has a dark and disturbing past. Yet, as we listen to his bemused voiceover narration, ala classic detective movies of the 40's and 50's, he's remarkably well adjusted. Dylan used to be a paranormal investigator and more importantly, the one human being standing between humans and the undead.

Vampires, Werewolves and Zombies

In the universe of Dylan Dog, settled perfectly in the haunted streets of New Orleans, vampires, zombies and werewolves are real and living mostly peacefully among humans. When one of the undead got out of line it was Dylan who stepped in to investigate and correct matters. However, when things got personal and someone Dylan cared about was murdered he walked away.

Now, Dylan is being called back to action after the murder of a smuggler who has brought to New Orleans a deadly device that could mean the end of human and undead kind. With his trusty sidekick Marcus (Sam Huntington), a zombie after being attacked early on by one of the film's big bad guys, Dylan must re-enter his former life and stop a possible apocalypse.

Noir Mystery meets Horror movie monsters

The premise of "Dylan Dog," which is based on a wildly popular (in Europe) Italian comic book by Tiziano Sclavi, is a tribute to classic noir murder mysteries. Brandon Routh doesn't exactly embody hard boiled detective ala Humphrey Bogart but Routh's off-hand voiceover and quirky approach to the role give the film flavor if not the most accurate homage to classic noir mystery.

The notion that vampires, werewolves and zombies live among us is not new, "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," which gets an almost subliminal shout out in "Dylan Dog," carried a similar premise on television to great success. That "Dylan Dog" came along first, the comic book began in the mid-eighties, matters little, the movie is clearly influenced by Buffy and pales in comparison.

Superman Returns wasn't Brandon Routh's fault

So, the noir homage is weak and the premise isn't new, what's left to like about "Dylan Dog: Dead of Night?" The only thing I can recommend is star Brandon Routh. Unfairly maligned for the failure of "Superman Returns" Routh is a clever and handsome actor with a great sense of humor, a strong instinct for deadpan line delivery and the physical presence to dominate a scene.

My affection for Brandon Routh is limited to liking his performance but not the movie in which it's trapped. The premise about one person standing between the world of the undead and the rest of everyday society is derivative and the homage to noir mystery is weak at best. The direction is at times sloppy, as is the script which attempts to honor the comic book but doesn't have enough detail to make any of the references meaningful to anyone but a very small cult.

Maybe catch "Dylan Dog: Dead of Night" on cable someday, late on a Saturday night when there is absolutely nothing else on worth watching.

Movie Review Hoodwinked 2 Hood Vs. Evil

Hoodwinked 2 Hood vs. Evil (2011) 

Directed by Mike Disa 

Written by Cory Edwards, Todd Edwards, Tony Leech, Mike Disa 

Starring Hayden Panattiere, Patrick Warburton, Glenn Close, Cory Edwards 

Release Date April 29th, 2011

Published April 29th, 2011

It's rare when a sequel is better than the original. Then again, few movies as bad as 2005's "Hoodwinked" actually get sequels. We're not exactly talking about "Godfather 2" surpassing the original "Godfather" here. "Shrek" vs. "Shrek 2" is barely a fair comparison. "Hoodwinked 2: Hood vs. Evil" had a low bar to exceed to improve on the first film and in that way it succeeded.

Hansel & Gretel

Red (voice of Hayden Panettiere subbing for Ann Hathaway) has gone off to train with a mysterious sisterhood of bakers who hold the key to an ancient truffle recipe that could give the one who eats the truffle unending power if they can guess the secret ingredient. Meanwhile, Red's Granny (Glenn Close) and her partner the Wolf (Patrick Warburton) with his sidekick Twitchy (Cory Edwards, writer and co-director of the first "Hoodwinked") are on the case of two children kidnapped by a witch living in a Gingerbread house.

Yes, Hansel & Gretel (Bill Hader and Amy Poehler) have been kidnapped by an evil witch (Joan Cusack) and she won't release them until Granny gives up the secret truffle recipe secret ingredient. Eventually, Granny is taken hostage and Red must break off her training to team with the Wolf and Twitchy to rescue her.

James Bond, Kill Bill and Granny

"Hoodwinked 2" shares with the first film the idea of 'Happily Ever After' as a secret law enforcement agency, led by Freddy Flippers (David Ogden Stiers), which assures happy endings to all fairy tale creatures. Where the first film took the "Rashomon" multiple stories from different perspectives, "Hoodwinked 2" goes for straight forward action with nods to Kill Bill and James Bond.

You have to admire the high minded film references of both "Hoodwinked" films but "Hoodwinked 2" gains something from not convoluting the references and instead telling a straightforward action comedy story with mere nods toward what influenced them. It's a cleaner, clearer and funnier approach than in the original which was far too proud of how clever the filmmakers thought they were.

Better than the original

The animation of "Hoodwinked 2," which is playing in both 3D and 2D, is a nice counterpoint to the slick CG animation that has become the standard. It's not nearly as beautiful but it's not as distractingly arty or disturbingly uncanny either. The characters are reminiscent of computer generated Rankin and Bass characters with their chubby faces and limbs.

"Hoodwinked 2: Hood vs. Evil" is far from brilliant. In fact, it is exceptionally minor entertainment. You could do better if there were a Pixar movie out there or if your kids have yet to see "Rio" or "Rango" but if they have seen those movies, "Hoodwinked 2" is a fine third choice, a modest and mildly funny kid's movie that surpasses the original.

Movie Review: Tyler Perry's Madea's Happy Family

Tyler Perry's Madea's Happy Family (2011) 

Directed Tyler Perry

Written by Tyler Perry

Starring Tyler Perry, Loretta Devine, Bow Wow, Tamala Mann, Isaiah Mustafa, Natalie Desselle 

Release Date April 22nd, 2011

Published April 23rd, 2011

Tyler Perry is the singularly most puzzling filmmaker on the planet. In the same film he can deliver a searing message about social ills and dress as a woman who carries a gun, talks like a gangsta and doesn't mind a little weed smoke. That jarring combination made Perry's debut feature, "Diary of A Mad Black Woman," arguably the most schizophrenic moviegoing experience of my life.

In 'Diary' Kimberly Elise delivers a powerhouse performance as an abused wife who finally takes control of her life. The film takes a disturbingly up close view of this abuse and Elise humanizes the suffering in an Oscar worthy performance. And then Perry, dressed in drag as Madea, enters the scene with a chainsaw and like some meta demon begins to almost literally cut the movie to pieces.

Like a Circus interrupting a funeral procession

The same other-worldly shifts in tone plagued Perry's well-meaning "Madea's Family Reunion," "I Can Do Bad All By Myself" and "Madea Goes to Jail." Each film features moments of raw, honest social commentary and each are then blown apart by Perry's insistence on donning a dress and providing clown-like comic relief. Madea enters each of these movies like a circus interrupting a funeral procession.

The Madea issue is slightly less pronounced in Perry's latest feature, "Madea's Big Happy Family." Madea and fellow clown-like, broad stroke characters Uncle Joe (Also played by Perry) and Mr. Brown (David Mann), who even dresses the part of a clown, enter the fray early and often in "Big Happy Family" and never allow the drama of the A story, that of a family falling apart as the matriarch prepares to pass away, to take hold.

Strength in faith

Loretta Devine is Shirley, a long suffering niece of Perry's Madea Simmons, who has just been informed that her cancer has recurred and their is little that can be done. Finding strength in her faith; Shirley has just one wish left before she's ready to join Jesus. Shirley wants one last dinner with her family so that she can tell them all at once that she doesn't have much time left.

This wish is much more complicated than it sounds as each member of the family is consumed with their own baggage. Shirley's youngest, Byron (Rapper Bow Wow) is struggling with a past arrest and an unplanned pregnancy with a nightmare baby mama (Lauren London) and a new girlfriend (Teyana Taylor) who is pushing him to get back into drug dealing.

Henpecked husbands

Shirley's daughter Kimberly (Shannon Kane) has nearly cut all ties with her family in order to establish a suburban, buppy (Black Urban Professional) lifestyle with her henpecked husband Calvin (Isaiah Mustafa) and their son. Kimberly and Calvin have the best dramatic arc of any of the characters in "Big Happy Family" but like all drama in the film, the arc gets truncated by Perry's big top act of Madea, Brown and their daughter Cora (Tamela J. Mann).

Madea's not all bad

Natalie Desselle and comedian Rodney Perry round out the cast of "Big Happy Family" as Shirley's oldest daughter and her henpecked hubby. One must wonder what Shirley had done to the girls' father in order for both women to turn out so horrible to their husbands but that is a subject for a more thorough and thoughtful movie than "Big Happy Family" which is more at home with Madea kicking butt than it is with Shirley's harrowing family life.

There is no denying that Madea can be funny and even, on rare occasions, insightful. There are moments in "Big Happy Family" when Madea's force of nature feels necessary to the plot and even helpful as she/he provides comic relief and a needed swat on the backside of these often troubling characters.

Special guest Maury Povich

Those moments, sadly, are all too rare as the film is padded out to feature length with fat jokes, choke-a-ho jokes and an odd extended public service announcement about the plague of diabetes in African Americans and the need for colonoscopies. There is also an entirely unnecessary arch comic cameo by Maury Povich and his dark comic DNA testing episodes.

In the end, despite honest moments of moving drama from Loretta Devine, Shannon Kane and Isaiah Mustafa, "Madea's Big Happy Family" is mostly a bad movie. It's not funny enough to be a good comedy and their is too much (literal) clowning around going on to allow the drama to resonate. Perry's direction is stilted and, as with each of his previous films, lacks style. In essence, "Madea's Big Happy Family" is typical Tyler Perry.

Movie Review: Water for Elephants

Water for Elephants (2011) 

Directed by Francis Lawrence

Written by Richard LaGravanese

Starring Reese Witherspoon, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz, Hal Holbrook

Release Date April 22nd, 2011

Published April 21st, 2011

It would be easy to write off "Water for Elephants" as a soppy, sappy chick flick on sight of its romantically lit poster and based on the female following of star Robert Pattinson. Easy, but a real shame to do so. Though "Water for Elephants" does have elements traditionally assigned to a chick flick it happens to also be an exceptionally entertaining, at times thrilling drama about circus life in the 1930's and three arresting characters; four if you count the elephant.

Riding the rails

In an old man's flashback to 1931 we meet Jacob played by "Twilight" star Robert Pattinson. On his final day at Cornell University's veterinary school Jacob is informed that his beloved parents have been killed in a car accident. Jacob's father had mortgaged everything to pay Jacob's tuition so, with his father's death went the house Jacob grew up in. With no family and no home Jacob hits the road and seeing a train in the middle of the night he hops a ride.

As older Jacob (Hal Holbrooke) tells it he's not sure if 'he chose the train or the train chose him' either way, Jacob seems to have been destined to come aboard the Benzini Brother Circus train where he gets work as a roustabout until his veterinary skills are discovered by the circus owner, August (Christoph Walz) who hires Jacob to tend to the animals, especially the horses used by August's wife Marlena (Reese Witherspoon).

Forbidden love

You know from trailers and commercials that Jacob and Marlena are destined to fall in love and that August does not take well to being cuckolded. What you don't know until you see "Water for Elephants" is what an elegant and often thrilling journey it is getting to Jacob and Marlena's love affair and its tragic and romantic aftermath.

"Water for Elephants" was adapted and crafted by screenwriter Richard Lagravanese, Oscar nominee for "The Fisher King," and unlikely director Francis Lawrence whose previous credits include the post-apocalyptic blockbuster "I Am Legend" and the comic book adaptation "Constantine." This unlikely team is somehow just right for the detailed period love story of "Water for Elephants" as Lagravanese found the humanity of the characters and Lawrence mined the period detail of Sarah Gruen's novel for a surprising visual feast.

Aiding Lawrence was the team of cinematographer Rodrigo Prieto (Brokeback Mountain) and longtime Terence Malick partner, production designer Jack Fisk. Together this trio transports us back to the 1930's with astonishing period detail. The visual splendor of "Water for Elephants" is the kind of unexpected pleasure usually reserved for late in the year, Oscar contending releases.

Pattinson and Witherspoon have spark

The three main cast members of "Water for Elephants" each brings a unique magic to their performance. Robert Pattinson, though not the most emotive actor working today, has a presence that is both leading man handsome and yet character actor unique. His Jacob is a great deal like his Edward from Twilight or his romantic hero from Remember Me, a rebellious with a tendency for finding trouble as a way of defending the people he cares about.

Pattinson and Reese Witherspoon have a strong romantic chemistry that is well communicated in looks and a meaningful caress. Both actors also have great chemistry with the film's fourth lead, Rosie the elephant played by Tai the elephant. Witherspoon spent three months prior to filming "Water for Elephants" working with Tai and attending circus camp so that she and Tai could deliver a believable team performance.

Ringmaster Christoph Walz

Christoph Walz is the scene stealer of "Water for Elephants" in a role that is every bit as compelling as his Oscar winning turn in Quentin Tarentino's "Inglorious Basterds." Walz's August is unquestionably the bad guy but the layers that Walz brings to the character beyond his abusiveness are fascinating examples of show and don't tell. In the way August speaks we find a man desperate for acceptance in a world harsh to immigrants. In his bold style of dress you find a man struggling to be seen as successful even while his circus is failing and his wife is beginning to stray.

These subtle character touches are part of the joy of "Water for Elephants" which also has compelling suspense, romance and grandeur. While a period romance based on a literary source starring a teen idol definitely screams chick flick, those who write off "Water for Elephants" as such will miss out on a highly compelling and well acted drama that is more than worthy of the modern movie ticket price.

Movie Review: Your Highness

Your Highness (2011) 

Directed by David Gordon Green 

Written by Danny McBride, Ben Best 

Starring Danny McBride, James Franco, Natalie Portman, Zooey Deschanel, Justin Theroux, Damian Lewis

Release Date April 8th, 2011

Published April 8th, 2011

In "Your Highness" Danny McBride stars as Thaddeus, the loathsome younger brother of Fabious (James Franco), a heroic Knight and heir to the throne of Mourn. Thaddeus spends his days getting high and bedding chambermaids and is content to continue this lifestyle until Fabious returns from his latest quest with a new bride to be, Belladonna (Zooey Deschanel).

Dragons, Knights and Minotaur's oh my

Thaddeus is supposed to be his brother's best man at the wedding but he fails to show up, choosing to get high instead. While Thaddeus is M.I.A the wedding is attacked by the evil sorcerer Leezar (Justin Theroux) who takes Belladonna hostage with the intent of impregnating her as part an ancient ritual.

Now, Thaddeus will be forced by his father the King (Charles Dance) to join Fabious and his Knights on a quest to retrieve Belladonna or lose his part of the family fortune. Along the way there will be betrayals and dangerous detours into unfriendly kingdoms and a maiden, Isabel (Natalie Portman) who will join the quest and prove herself more than equal to Fabious and his Knights and of course very superior to Thaddeus.

Satire Fail

The plot of "Your Highness" is a derivative satire cum appreciation of cheesy period action movies like "Dragonslayer" and "Krull." "Your Highness" is pitched to a level of poking fun at these movies but in reality, "Your Highness" plays far less sarcastically than was, I believe, the original intent. It's not that "Your Highness" ever takes its adventure plot seriously but rather that the satire is less pointed than it should be.

That could also be a function of the complete lack of invention in all of the humor of "Your Highness." Random four letter words, penis jokes, bare breasts and marijuana are all alluded to and shown in "Your Highness" and yet none of it earned a laugh. Star Danny McBride, who also co-wrote the script for "Your Highness" with Ben Best, falls for the classic trap of thinking the mere presentation of the outrageous is funny.

Franco and Portman

James Franco is engagingly game as the heroic Fabious. The "127 Hours" Academy Award nominee is at times the only actor in "Your Highness" who understands the high satiric tone the film should be striving for; hitting his hero lines with the perfect mix of self awareness and pomposity. Unfortunately, the friendly chemistry Franco and McBride demonstrated in "Pineapple Express" is greatly lacking in "Your Highness."

Natalie Portman is the greatest victim of "Your Highness." Portman's Isabel fails as satire of comic book warrior chicks or as a send up of any recognizable movie character. Her comic delivery is stiff and her action heroine moments are so competent and believable that it fails as a satire of anything other than an idiot's notion of what women can or cannot do.

In the post-Ripley/Sarah Connor world it's simply not surprising or funny to see a woman kick ass and in the wake of overkill like "Sucker Punch" it's barely even titillating. So, one is left to wonder what function does Portman's character serve? If you have a good idea, I wouldn't mind hearing it.

Danny McBride has shown that he can be very funny in supporting roles in movies like "Pineapple Express" and "Tropic Thunder," among other films. Unfortunately, called upon to be a leading man he falls desperately flat. Worse yet, the satire of medieval adventure movies are just as flat and unfunny as McBride's lead performance.

"Your Highness" simply fails in every fashion.

Movie Review Insidious

Insidious (2011) 

Directed by James Wan 

Written by Leigh Whannell

Starring Patrick Wilson, Rose Byrne, Barbara Hershey, Lin Shaye 

Release Date April 1st, 2011

Published April 1st, 2011

The creators of "Saw" and "Paranormal Activity" have come together to create a PG-13 creep-fest that doesn't lose anything for its lack of gore and swear words. "Insidious" stars Rose Byrne as Renai and Patrick Wilson as her husband Josh. Together they have three kids and a brand new dream home.

Dream home becomes a nightmare

Unfortunately, that dream home quickly turns into a nightmare when Renai and Josh's son Dalton (Ty Simpkins) explores the house he ends up falling off a ladder. Soon after, Dalton falls into a coma and that's when things get weird. Dalton's doctor informs mom and dad that their son has no physical trauma from his fall and there is no medical reasoning for his coma.

Dalton is taken home and for a few months he simply seems to sleep. That's when the haunting begins. First, the whole family is taunted by some entity that sets off their security system. Then Renai begins seeing figures walking around the house. Finally the family is forced out of the house, assuming that it is the house that is haunted. I will stop the direct plot description there.

There's something about Elise

The fun of "Insidious" really begins after the family moves into their new home and the ghosts move with them and Lin Shaye, best remembered as the overly suntanned neighbor of Cameron Diaz in "There's Something About Mary" joins the cast as Elise, a psychic, paranormalist and expert in something called 'Astral Projection.' Shaye's performance is arguably the most entertaining in the film as she is both oddly sunny and believably strange.

Elise with her team, including "Insidious" screenwriter Lee Whannell, informs the family that Dalton is not in a coma. What's wrong with Dalton is one of the many fun secrets of "Insidious" that I will not spoil. Director James Wan and writer Leigh Whannell prove with "Insidious" that they don't need the torture implements of the "Saw" films to earn screams from the audience.

If you thought Tiny Tim was creepy before...

In "Insidious" Wan and Whannell use clever imagery to get the big scares. Watch the windows; in nearly every window frame in "Insidious" there is a frightening glimpse of something creepy. Wan and Whannell don't stop at pictures however and when the spooks and demons begin coming into the room things get really creepy. Wan and Whannell even turn Tiny Tim's ukulele anthem "Tiptoe through the Tulips" into an eerie set piece.

"Insidious" is a smart combination of Wan and Whannell's talent for fright imagery with the concept of the "Paranormal Activity" movies with their endless numbers of cameras, doors that shut by themselves and ghastly ghostly possessions. It's a surprisingly good mix that somehow works even with the restrictive PG-13 rating.

Movie Review Hop

Hop (2011) 

Directed by Tim Hill

Written by Cinco Paul, Ken Daurio, Brian Lynch 

Starring Russell Brand, James Marsden, Hugh Laurie, Gary Cole, Kaley Cuoco, Elizabeth Perkins

Release Date April 1st, 2011

Published April 1st, 2011

"Hop" is yet another example of a movie that is more ideal than it is a story. The idea: What if the Easter Bunny ran away to Hollywood and met a struggling schlub who always wanted to be the Easter Bunny himself? Now, while that is a potentially funny and strange idea, the makers of "Hop" seem to have stopped at coming up with the premise.

Russell Brand as the Easter Bunny

"Hop" stars the voice of Russell Brand as E.B, a young rabbit destined to become the Easter Bunny. But, E.B he doesn't want to be the Easter Bunny. E.B's dad (voice of House star Hugh Laurie) is passing the job to him after years of being the Easter Bunny himself. E.B however, dreams of being a drummer in a band and with his dream in mind, he runs away to Hollywood.

Running parallel to E.B's story is that of Fred O'Hare (James Marsden) who is living with his parents (Gary Cole and Elizabeth Perkins) after being fired from his job. Fred has no direction or ambition until his sister (Big Bang Theory's Kaley Kuoco) gives him an opportunity to house sit at a glorious Hollywood mansion.

David Hasselhoff is not funny

That's when Fred meets E.B and, to no one's surprise, E.B begins shaking up Fred's life, causing trouble wherever the two of them go. Fred is a good sport however, and he does take E.B to an audition for a TV talent show hosted by the egregiously unfunny David Hasselhoff.

I will stop there with the 'plot' description as the rest is relatively predictable nonsense. "Hop" was directed by Tim Hill who brought the same eccentric chaos to the first "Alvin and the Chipmunks" movie and the second 'Garfield' movie. To Mr. Hill's credit he has become very competent at incorporating animated characters and human characters.

Set ups, gags and no story

If only Mr. Hill had the same attention to story detail as he does to animated ones. Sadly, Mr. Hill, along with the several screenwriters on "Hop," neglected the story in favor of setting up and paying off gags that could be described as hit and miss if I wanted to be generous. There are far more misses than hits in the gags of "Hop."

The biggest problem with "Hop" is that it is a premise and not a movie. The creators of "Hop" invented an idea about the Easter Bunny in the real world and then invented some gags to play against that premise but nothing that ever coheres into a well told and meaningful story.

Why see Hop when you could see Rango

Kids might enjoy the colorful animation and I know a few adults who just like the sounds of Russell Brand and Hugh Laurie's accents, but these are not the kinds of pleasures that a critic can recommend you spend your hard earned money on. I especially cannot recommend a movie like "Hop" when "Rango" is in theaters. "Rango" is a movie that does more to earn the price of a ticket in the opening credits than "Hop" does in its entire 90 plus minute run time.

Movie Review: Big Momma's House Like Father Like Son

Big Momma's House Like Father Like Son (2011) 

Directed by John Whitesell

Written by Matthew Fogel, Don Rhymer

Starring Martin Lawrence, Brandon T. Jackson, Jessica Lewis 

Release Date February 18th, 2011 

Published February 19th, 2011

Aside from innumerable insults to director John Whitesell, star Martin Lawrence, screenwriters Matthew Fogel and Don Rhymer and a sympathetic shake of the head for young comic Brandon T. Jackson, what is their left to offer to the movie “Big Momma's Like Father, Like Son?” This is a movie of ungodly awfulness and yet pointing that out seems unnecessary because everyone, the creators included, knew that would be the case going in.

The futility of reviewing this travesty of good intentions and PG rated oddity is off the charts. Critics have been rendered irrelevant by movies before (I am looking at you Sandler) but rarely have so many of us been left with so little to say about a movie than what we have left to say about “Big Momma's Like Father, Like Son:” Everyone knew this movie was going to stink out loud.

Now, I can already hear the catcalls about 'critical objectivity' and 'not forming an opinion before you see a movie' so let me put that to bed; in the day and age of mass marketing and the internet, it is nearly impossible, even for the most professional of professional critics, not to make certain judgments about a movie before seeing it. To not be exposed to certain aspects of a film before seeing it the critic would have to live under a rock and even then, as Geico pointed out in rather brilliant recent commercial, some information is simply unavoidable.

Do you really want a plot description? Really? Okay; FBI Agent Malcolm Turner is back in his Big Momma get up after his idiot stepson Trent (Brandon T. Jackson) ambushes him while on a stake out and ends up witnessing a murder. Now, not only will Malcolm be hiding out in drag, so will Trent, in the guise of Charmaine.

Malcolm and Trent, as Big Momma and her grand-niece Charmaine, hide out at an All Girls Arts College in Atlanta. There, the recent murder victim has hidden a key piece of evidence against his murderer. Naturally, the setting will invite all sorts of awkward comic situations and for Trent a love interest, a singer named Haley (Jessica Lucas).

What? No love interest for Malcolm? Nope, he remains married according to the storyline began in the first Big Momma movie but in a move that can only be described as a great act of charity to actress Nia Long, Mrs. Turner is conveniently dispatched to some place where she can't even be reached by phone.

No such luck for comedian Faizon Love who gets the unfortunate task of being Big Momma's love interest, a College security guard that Malcolm/Big Momma must keep interested if he is going to get close to that key piece of evidence he needs. Also sacrificed to this awful story; rising star Portia Doubleday (Youth in Revolt) as the school bitch and Michelle Ang as the school basket case.

If the murder plot weren't convoluted and tired enough “Big Momma's Like Father, Like Son” also pauses repeatedly for some seriously awful musical interludes. Trent is a wannabe rapper, calling himself the Prodigee(?), and he offers up some of the lamest PG raps since Will Smith gave up the moniker Fresh Prince. 

Jessica Lucas has a pleasant but unspectacular voice, think Norah Jones minus a soul, which gets far too much screen-time in “Big Momma's Like Father, Like Son.” Why? Because, director John Whitesell has a bizarre notion that this comic, lowbrow murder mystery should also be a PG rated tract defending the arts. No, I'm not making that up. 

”Big Momma's Like Father, Like Son” morphs Martin Lawrence's Big Momma franchise into a quasi-Disney Channel movie where education and the arts are given equal weight against a goofabout murder mystery plot. Good intentions run alongside a surprisingly puritanical vibe interrupted only by Love's disturbing lust for Big Momma and Trent's occasionally lascivious longings for his fellow students. 

The goody goody-ness of “Big Momma's Like Father, Like Son” serves as some sort of attempt at earnestness as a defense against critics like me. I am apparently supposed to reward the film for having moral fiber rather than simply trashing it for being a wholly awful exercise in filmmaking. Well, tough break kids. 

No, mere good intentions cannot justify such a slothful effort. “Big Momma's Like Father, Like Son” is far too slapdash and insignificant to get a pass because it has high ideals. I appreciate that the filmmakers wanted to make a nice point about education and the arts but they needed to do it while making a good movie and they simply did not.

Movie Review: Unknown

Unknown (2011) 

Directed by Jaume Collet Serra 

Written by Oliver Butcher, Mandy Richardson, Stephen Cornwell

Starring Liam Neeson, January Jones, Diane Kruger, Aidan Quinn, Frank Langella

Release Date February 18th, 2011

Published February 17th, 2011

The transition from respected 'Actor' to action hero has been stunningly seamless for Liam Neeson. All it took in fact was one role, that of a man with a special set of skills and a kidnapped daughter in some Euro slum. “Taken” became an action phenomenon because Neeson the actor gave the over the top action gravitas; his acting as a badass became a whole new iconic identity as an actor.

With his new thriller “Unknown” essentially a pseudo sequel to “Taken” Neeson is set to fully monetize his new icon status.

Dr. Martin Harris and his wife Elizabeth (Mad Men's January Jones) arrive in Berlin looking like any other tourist of means. But when Martin leaves his briefcase behind at the airport and is nearly killed in an accident on his way to retrieve it the happy couple takes a shocking and disturbing turn.

Waking four days later from a coma in a Berlin hospital Martin can't remember how he got there and cannot understand why his wife never came looking for him. Returning to their hotel where he is supposed to be attending a scientific conference Martin makes a horrific discovery, Elizabeth doesn't know who he is and another, very similar looking man (Aiden Quinn) is posing as Dr. Martin Harris.

Is Martin crazy? Did the blow to his head completely scramble his brain? Why can't he get anyone he knows on the phone? All will be answered and while those answers will eventually become unsatisfying and even blindingly ludicrous, the journey toward those answers is a rollicking thriller ride that fans of “Taken” will find impossible to resist.

All I wanted from “Unknown” is for Liam Neeson to punch a bad guy in the throat and on this meager request Mr. Neeson delivers in spectacular fashion; “Unknown” may not be an official “Taken” sequel but Neeson delivers the kind of action badassery audiences crave from his newly minted action hero persona.

Yes, “Unknown” goes completely looney tunes in the last reel as Frank Langella arrives in the role of God of Exposition and ruins everything with explanatory dialogue that may as well have been delivered directly to the audience, but again, it's about the getting there.

Bruno Gans damn near steals “Unknown” right from under Liam Neeson. Playing a former member of the East German secret police who Martin turns to in order to find himself, literally find out who he himself is, Gans delivers a performance of measure and precision that would be Oscar worthy in a movie that academy members would actually watch.

Bottom line, fans of “Taken” will not be able to resist the nasty, violent charm of “Unknown.” Liam Neeson's astonishing talent for elevating B-movie material with his professionalism and imposing physicality is one of the great revelations of this short filmic decade. Neeson has changed the way we look at him as an actor as well as the action genre in general with the quality he brings to lowbrow material.

Movie Review The Eagle

The Eagle (2011) 

Directed by Kevin MacDonald 

Written by Jeremy Brock 

Starring Channing Tatum, Jamie Bell, Donald Sutherland, Mark Strong

Release Date February 11th, 2011 

Published February 11th, 2011

Could the wholly un-ironic hero be making a comeback? If the new action movie “The Eagle” is any indication the answer is a solid maybe. The box office is the real deciding factor on such a trend but “The Eagle” is a notable movie for bringing back the story of the unabashed hero, a flawless, stalwart do-gooder who does what he feels is right without pausing for reflection or most importantly without the armor of ironic distance from his quest.

Channing Tatum is the earnest star of “The Eagle” as Marcus Aquila the new commander of a decrepit English outpost of the Roman Empire. Marcus's father was the leader of the legendary 9th Legion, 5000 men who simply vanished in Northern England (Scotland) leading to the establishment of Hadrian's Wall, the edge of the earth for Romans.

Lost in the battle with the 9th Legion was their legendary symbol, a golden eagle that stands for Rome. Marcus aches to recover the Eagle to restore honor to his family name. After suffering an injury in battle Marcus's military career looks to have ended abruptly but after a painful recovery he is ready for a return and he has one quest in particular in mind.

With only the aid of his slave Esca (Jamie Bell), Marcus intends to cross into the unconquered territories and rescue the Eagle of the 9th.

”The Eagle” is a movie that doesn't mess around; director Kevin McDonald jumps into the fray and tells a well paced, well motivated story with an economy of dialogue and free of the kind of sardonic asides that modern action movies use as a buttress against seeming to care about the action around them.

The modern action movie began employing humor as a way of barricading itself from the criticism of the oftentimes goofy action, a way of saying 'we know how goofy this looks.' However, in becoming self aware, the action hero became self conscious and the act of heroism became a burden. “The Eagle” rejects the distance between hero and heroism and in doing so feels kind of fresh in comparison.

Channing Tatum is really the perfect star for this kind of movie. Tatum's stony visage seems incapable of winking at the audience, or of really knowing why he would be winking. Instead, Tatum bowls forward head first into the action with earnest relish and while you can make fun of his lack of depth his sturdy toughness fits the role and gives “The Eagle” some real juice.

While Tatum brings the toughness, Jamie Bell brings the acting chops. Bell steals scene after scene in “The Eagle” with his angry, determined performance. Bell gives life to Esca's back story, a slave captured from the North who may just as soon slit Marcus's throat as save his life, with his forceful words and a deathly stare.

The action in “The Eagle” is a little too much of the quick cut style that has plagued far too many modern action epics but director Kevin McDonald saves it with solid pacing and well motivated characters. His heroes have purpose and desire and while honor in battle is something that the modern action hero turns his nose up at, it's refreshing to see that type of hero make a comeback here.

”The Eagle” is a rugged, earnest action movie for audiences that have tired of the modern action hero and his ironic aside. I'm not saying that ironic self awareness is dead but occasionally it's nice to see a hero who says what he means and does what he says he's going to do without the armor of the one liner to keep anyone from taking him too seriously. There is something at stake in “The Eagle” and the hero doesn't hide from it behind a jokey insistence that nothing really matters.