Movie Review: Blue Crush

Blue Crush (2002) 

Directed by John Stockwell 

Written by Lizzy Weiss, John Stockwell 

Starring Kate Bosworth, Michele Rodriguez, Matthew Davis, Sanoe Lake, Mika Boorem 

Release Date August 16th, 2002

Published August 15th, 2002 

I have a bad history with surfing movies. First there were those god awful Frankie and Annette movies my mother made me watch as a kid. UGH. Then there was Point Break, which is an awful movie but at least it's bad in a way that can make you laugh. Then there was the god awful Endless Summer 2. I haven't seen the original Endless Summer but if it's anything like the sequel I should drop to my knees and thank God I've been able to avoid it. 

Now comes Blue Crush, a surfer chick movie that mixes sports movie cliches with lame romantic comedy but still manages to be mildly entertaining.

Kate Bosworth stars as Ann Marie, a maid and former pro surfing competitor. She quit competing after nearly being killed in competition. After 3 years she is ready to compete again thanks to the encouragement of her roommates Eden (Michele Rodriguez) and Lena (Sanoe Lake). After being fired from her maid job for lecturing guests on their hygene, Ann Marie takes an offer to teach a group of football players how to surf. One of the players is a star Quarterback named Matt (Matthew Davis) who is interested in far more than surfing. Well duh.

Blue Crush is a sports movie and a romantic comedy, thus it is bound by the genre conventions of each and so we are treated to the typical roadblocks of both genres in tiresome repetitive scenes. This is especially apparent in the surfing competition where Ann Marie fails over and over and over. Okay we get it, she's got issues, can she overcome them so I can go now? 

The romance is troubled by the culture clash of the poor maid and the rich football player, and what his true intentions are and what will people think and blah blah blah. The film has not one new twist on these conventional situations. However, the film isn't as bad as it seems. The performances by Bosworth and especially Michele Rodriguez actually surpass the cliches and develop real interesting characters. 

The real stars of Blue Crush though are the cameras which get right in the surf and show off angles not likely seen before. You have to wonder at times just what is real because it seems there is no way a camera could get these shots. If there were any digital effects used, and there probably were, they are seamlessly integrated. On a side note there is more than one scene where a camera is visible in the surf.

Blue Crush has an element of guilty pleasure. Gorgeous girls in tiny bikinis and kick ass surfing scenes, namely. Guilty pleasures aside though, Blue Crush is never more than a mild distraction.

Movie Review: The Adventures of Pluto Nash

The Adventures of Pluto Nash

Directed by Ron Underwood 

Written by Neil Cuthbert 

Starring Eddie Murphy, Rosario Dawson, Dennis Quaid, John Cleese, Peter Boyle, Jay Mohr

Release Date August 16th, 2002 

There have been a lot of bad things said about The Adventures Of Pluto Nash, a lot of those things stemming from the film's mega-budget and two-year shelf life. A lot of bad things continue to be said, but not by me. While Pluto Nash isn't a great film it's not nearly as bad as many people say it is. Indeed, there are times when even the most talented critics have their knives out preemptively, overly preparing to write a negative review of a movie that arrives with a bit of baggage. 

Eddie Murphy is Pluto Nash, the most popular nightclub owner on the moon. Things couldn't be better, especially after he hires a gorgeous new waitress named Dina (Rosario Dawson). Things change quickly however after Pluto refuses to sell his club to a mobster named Crater. After the club is blown up, Pluto, Dina and Pluto's robot bodyguard Bruno (Dennis Quaid) go on the run and eventually go after Crater. They are helped along the way by a great supporting cast including Pam Grier, Peter Boyle, Jay Mohr, and Luis Guzman.

It's good to see the old cocky, confident Eddie Murphy back even if he isn't at the top of his game. As Pluto Nash, Murphy is back as the conman always two steps ahead of everyone else. Here he’s far more appealing than his recent buffoonish turn in Showtime. Eddie Murphy needs to stop market testing his humor and let loose and in The Adventures of Pluto Nash, he’s almost back to his best. If only he’d stop listening to the people who push him toward PG-13 trash over his more comfortable R-rated space. 

Pluto Nash is a unique combination of 40's gangster movies with cheesy 50's sci-fi and it's those touches of classic genre that provide the film its comic atmosphere. The more modern humor, such as having Hillary Clinton's face on the hundred-dollar bill, isn't funny, admittedly but every comedy has a clunker or two.. Many people, without even seeing this film, said it would suck. I was one of them, if I am being honest. The evidence for the film stinking out loud was overwhelming. So, perhaps, the best review I could give The Adventures Of Pluto Nash is to say that it doesn't completely suck.

Movie Review: XXX

XXX (2002) 

Directed by Rob Cohen

Written by Rich Wilkes 

Starring Vin Diesel, Asia Argento, Martin Csokas, Samuel L. Jackson, 

Release Date August 9th, 2002 

Published August 8th, 2002

The team that brought us the Fast & the Furious is back with yet another big dumb action flick called XXX. Unfortunately, where Furious reveled in it's ridiculousness, XXX would like to be taken as seriously as possible as an action movie and a potential franchise. But after seeing XXX, I would rather see Fast & the Furious 2.

XXX is the nickname of Xander Cage (Diesel), an internet entrepreneur whose underground video's of himself performing amazingly dumb and illegal stunts sell well enough to support XXX's lifestyle of gorgeous bimbo's and extreme sports. Unfortunately for Xander his most recent stunt attracted the attention of the National Security Agency. Samuel L Jackson is agent Gibbons who sees XXX as expendable talent and enlists XXX to go to Prague and infiltrate a group of terrorists who call themselves Anarchy 99.

The terrorist leader is Yorgi (Martin Csokas). Yorgi, in typical terrorist fashion, is bluffed by XXX and and takes him into his evil lair. It's not long however before XXX's cover is blown and now he must rely on a Russian agent already in Yorgi's inner circle, a beautiful woman named Yolena (Asia Argento).  The surprising thing about XXX is that it wasn't made by MTV films. With it's glossy market tested style and soundtrack that is far more prominent than the film's dialogue, it would fit in perfectly in the MTV canon.

Indeed XXX is the kind of film that was pitched to the studio marketing department before being pitched to producers and directors. It plays like a two hour version of those late 90's Mountain Dew commercials.

The whole film is cornball and cliched, with flat uncomfortable dialogue that tries desperately to sound young and hip. Coming from a cast of 30-somethings it sounds lame and uncomfortable. A scene early on at a party at XXX's pad we hear dialogue from actors who are clearly not comfortable with the modern slang and come off like that high school teacher who desperately tries to sound hip, but comes off as simply embarrassing.

You can see the corners that were cut in order to secure the more audience friendly PG 13 rating. There is no nudity but the lack of totally naked flesh is made up for in two hours worth misogyny and objectification. As for Vin Diesel, he is a credible action star, although he needs to work on his one liners if he ever wants to replace Arnie and Sly.

The poser dialogue and cheesy effects especially the snowboarding scenes, all serve to create a slick soulless version of the Bond series. The Bond series however earned the right to be cliched and sexist by being successful more than once. XXX has been annointed the next great franchise even before the original script was finished. 

Typical modern Hollywood.

Movie Review: Blood Work

Blood Work (2002) 

Directed by Clint Eastwood 

Written by Brian Helgeland

Starring Clint Eastwood, Gene Hackman, Jeff Daniels, Dylan Walsh, Anjelica Huston 

Release Date August 9th, 2002 

Published August 8th, 2002

As one of our greatest living actors, Clint Eastwood can be forgiven for many things. We can concede him the indulgence of playing a codger in a space comedy like Space Cowboys. We can forgive him, and even take a little pleasure watching him, in the trashy thriller Absolute Power. However, our good faith can only go so far, and when Eastwood releases a retread cop thriller like Blood Work, even Dirty Harry can't be forgiven this indulgence.

Blood Work stars Eastwood as a famous FBI criminal profiler--a job that is not nearly as glamorous or exciting as Hollywood would have you believe--Terry McCaleb. As we join the story, McCaleb joins a pair of cops, played by Paul Rodriguez and Dylan Walsh, as they walk through a crime that has a message specifically for McCaleb. Scrawled in blood on the wall is a code and the message "Catch me McCaleb." As McCaleb is exiting the crime scene, through a throng of reporters, a piece of evidence tips him off to a man in the crowd who may be the killer. McCaleb chases the suspect until he is felled by a heart attack, but not before popping a bullet in the suspect.

Two years later, McCaleb is the beneficiary of a heart transplant. The operation saved his life but ended his career. Now living on a boat in a marina, he passes the time fixing the boat and talking to his neighbor Buddy (Jeff Daniels). Out of the blue, a beautiful woman named Graciella (Wanda De Jesus) shows up on McCaleb's boat claiming to be the sister of the woman whose heart was given to McCaleb. She tells McCaleb that her sister was murdered and implores McCaleb to use his cop connections to find out what is happening with the investigation into her sister's murder.

From there you know what is going to happen. McCaleb is drawn into investigating the crime, which will inevitably connect to other crimes; innocent people will look suspicious; and the one least likely will turn out to be the killer. If you can't figure out this movie's secrets in the first 20 minutes, turn in your moviegoer's card and never come back to the theaters. 

If you don't feel like seeing Blood Work, rent The Bone Collector with Denzel Washington; the same lame thriller minutia populates both films. Blood Work is slightly more believable, but both are police procedurals. Normally, these films appear as straight-to-video trash starring people like Jeff Fahey and Patrick Bergin.

The most disappointing thing about Blood Work is that Eastwood also directed it. How can such a skilled director as Eastwood not see the obvious cliches in the script from Joel Schumacher wannabe Brian Helgeland? 

Eastwood knows the proper camera moves and his direction is studied and logical but the story Blood Work is too predictable to be either suspenseful or entertaining. After seeing this film, one is left to wonder if Eastwood's best work is behind him, a sad thought but one you can't help entertaining. I hope that is not true. Only time will tell. 

Movie Review The Good Girl

The Good Girl (2002) 

Directed by Miguel Arteta

Written by Mike White 

Starring Jennifer Aniston, Jake Gyllenhaal, John C. Reilly, Tim Blake Nelson

Release Date August 7th, 2002 

Published August 7th, 2002 

I sometimes wonder why I watch Friends. Was it the marketing hype? Was it the fact that seemingly everyone else watches it? Or. is the show actually pretty good. Honestly I'm not sure but I think that I like it because of the potential in the cast. Each member of the Friends cast has the talent to do something great. None has so far achieved that greatness.

Until now.

In The Good Girl, Jennifer Aniston is Justine Last, a bored to death cosmetics clerk at the Retail Rodeo. Justine hates her job and her coworkers, only tolerating their existence to make the job bearable. On top of that Justine is trapped in a loveless marriage to a lazy, shiftless pothead named Phil, expertly played by John C. Reilly. Phil and his pal Bubba (Tim Blake Nelson) paint houses together and spend most of their off hours on Justine's couch smoking weed.

Into all this comes Holden (Jake Gyllenhaal) a new hire at the Retail Rodeo. Holden is quiet and sad, always keeps to himself and Justine admires and envies his solitude. The two strike up a friendship that quickly moves to the bedroom. Of course things are never that easy. While Holden falls madly for Justine, she is unable to overcome her fears and leave her husband. After the excitement of leading the double life of wife and adulterer wears off, Justine begins to see Holden for who he truly is, an emotionally disturbed 22 year old child. The solitude and freedom she loved and coveted were products of cold indifferent parents and not her romantic notion of the tortured artist.

Aniston is superb. Her performance is raw and real. The decisions her character makes are at times shocking and dumb but the mistakes are made poignant by the desire for freedom that caused them and by Aniston's sympathetic eyes that seem constantly on the verge of tears. Aniston's supporting cast is equally strong, especially John C. Reilly who makes the husband's cluelessness endearing and sympathetic. In a great scene near the end, we find out why Phil smokes pot so much, a scene that is funny, touching and cathartic.

Gyllenhaal continues his odd streak of films from Bubble Boy to Donnie Darko and now this. In this film we see almost a repeat of his Darko role but with more sadness and rage. Writer Mike White and director Miguel Arteta teamed previously on the much buzzed about pic Chuck & Buck. After seeing The Good Girl, I desperately want to see Chuck & Buck. If it's as good as The Good Girl, we could have the next hot indie team on our hands.

The Good Girl is an art film with a pop sensibility provided by the casting of Aniston shedding her Friends role and becoming a great actress. This film could actually go down in history as the movie that killed Friends. With Aniston getting such terrific reviews and Oscar buzz it won't be long before she leaves the small screen for good.

Movie Review Tadpole

Tadpole (2002) 

Directed by Gary Winick 

Written by Heather McGowan, Niels Mueller 

Starring Aaron Stanford, Bebe Neuwirth, Sigourney Weaver, Robert Iler, John Ritter, Kate Mara

Release Date August 2nd, 2002

Published January 27th, 2003

Movies about worldly teenage boys falling for older women are nothing new. (The Graduate is a famous example that is more than 30 years old) However a movie about a 15-year-old boy who lusts after his stepmother... well I haven't seen that one before and really wasn't looking for it. Nevertheless the cheaply made Oedipus comedy Tadpole is charming. despite its strange twist on the Graduate formula.

Aaron Stanford stars as Oscar, who is nicknamed Tadpole by one of the film's minor supporting players (though everyone else calls him Oscar.) Oscar is an odd 15-year-old; he reads Voltaire, speaks fluent French and has an affinity for women's hands. Returning home to New York for Thanksgiving break Oscar explains to his friend Charlie (The Sopranos' Robert Iler) that this will be the weekend he tells the woman he loves how he feels. Oscar neglects to mention that the woman of his dreams is his stepmother, Eve, played by Sigourney Weaver.

Once home Oscar arrives at a party in progress and his loving father Stanley (John Ritter) attempts to set him up with the daughter of a friend. However, Oscar and his one-track mind blows off the girl and instead pines away for Eve. Disappointed after a night of watching his father and Eve together, Oscar goes out and gets a little drunk. As he stumbles home, he meets up with his stepmother's best friend Diane (Bebe Neuwirth). 

Rather than let Oscar go home and be discovered by his parents to be drunk, Diane invites Oscar to her place for coffee. One thing leads to another and Oscar and Diane end up in bed. Oscar feels horribly guilty; feels he has betrayed his feelings for Eve. This leads to the film's best scene in a restaurant with Oscar, his father, stepmother and Diane. As Oscar sweats over whether Diane will let his secret slip, Diane taunts him mercilessly and finally Oscar's childishness gets the better of him.

Shot on digital video with a budget of only $750,000, Tadpole isn't the best looking movie. Accordingly, director Gary Winick has to rely on the characters and they are interesting characters, especially Bebe Neuwirth's Diane. Neuwirth is amazing in this role; sexy and quick-witted, she is the film's real star. The film's lead, Aaron Stanford, who makes his film debut here--he will appear as Pyro in X-Men 2 this summer--isn't bad. Stanford is believable as an intellectual, overly analytical obsessive, though not as believable as a 15-year-old. In reality, he is 25 years old and he looks it.

Sigourney Weaver is believable as the object of Oscar's obsessions, but the conversations between her and Oscar are too stilted in double meanings to be believed. Ritter is forgettable as the clueless father whose basic job seems to be to get in the way of the rest of the characters. Tadpole has many funny moments, mostly provided by Neuwirth; however, at a mere 80 minutes there isn't much to it. The film's resolution is forgettable with a throwaway happy ending that throws aside all that has happened before it. There are no consequences or guilt--just an ending.

The film is strong on dialogue and Neuwirth is extraordinary in her supporting role so, for that, I can give  a partial recommendation to Tadpole. 

Movie Review Signs

Signs (2002) 

Directed by M. Night Shyamalan

Written by M. Night Shyamalan

Starring Mel Gibson, Joaquin Phoenix, Rory Culkin, Amanda Breslin

Release Date August 8th, 2002

Published August 4th, 2002 

I Can't Believe He Did It Again! Director M. Night Shyamalan, for the third consecutive film, has managed to twist audiences to his will with yet another twisted film that shocks and surprises. In Signs Shyamalan plays his audience like a violin and makes us like it in what is the best film of 2002.Taut, perfectly paced, and filled with breathtaking moments, Signs is yet another extraordinary signpost in the increasingly brilliant career of M. Night Shyamalan. 

Signs stars Mel Gibson as Father Graham Hess, or rather just Graham Hess. As we come to find out Graham has lost his faith in God and left the church. Now living on his farm with his two kids, Morgan (Rory Culkin) and Bo (Amanda Breslin) and his brother Merrill (Joaquin Phoenix), Graham seems to be slowly adjusting to life without faith. Then, not 10 minutes into the film we are thrust into a story involving the mythical urban legend: the crop circle.

To Graham it seems local idiots have vandalized his corn. It isn't until TV new coverage reveals that the crop formations aren't just in his cornfield, they are global. Interestingly enough the crop circles are merely the hook; the real story takes off well after we've seen our last crop circle.

Shyamalan adopts a sort of pop culture version of Hitchcock, aping the master’s style with his impressive film score that evokes some of Psycho and The Birds. Like Hitchcock, Shyamalan knows that the audience need not see anything to be scared, in fact, what the audience imagines is likely far scarier.

Mel Gibson is solid as always playing Graham with depth and feeling, never allowing the character to drift off into action hero mode but also not allowing him to be weak. Shyamalan once again shows his brilliant eye for casting children, with Rory Culkin proving to be the class of the Culkin family. And little Angela Breslin, whose wide-eyed deadpan delivery is used to both great dramatic and comedic effect.

One of the film’s most surprising elements is its sense of humor, which is perfectly timed and never takes away from the suspense. Shyamalan is beginning to show a pattern in his filmmaking style. A simplicity of storytelling that is so understated you barely notice it. He simply and artfully weaves together subtle realistic drama against outrageous backdrops. 

In the Sixth Sense it was ghosts, in Unbreakable it's comic book superheroes and in Signs it's.... no no, I am not going to be the asshole who ruins the fun. You will have to see it yourself in what may be the best film of the year.

Movie Review Austin Powers in Goldmember

Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002) 

Directed by Jay Roach

Written by Mike Myers, Michael McCullers

Starring Mike Myers, Beyonce, Seth Green, Michael York, Robert Wagner, Vern Troyer, Michael Caine

Release Date July 26th, 2002 

Published July 25th, 2002 

The original Austin Powers was a kick in the pants to the lazy action spy genre that was becoming repetitive and dull. The second film , The Spy Who Shagged Me, achieved the opposite effect, instead of continuing the satire of the first film, the sequel the trend of the moment gross out humor and ended up funny but derivative. Now comes the third film, and while Goldmember is slightly better than it's predecessor, it also lacks the originals sparky satirical bite.

Beginning with a sensational movie within a movie featuring eye popping celebrity cameo's, and quickly upping the ante with another hysterical dance sequence, Goldmember gets off to a spectacular start. Unfortunately it's downhill from there. As we rejoin the story Dr. Evil has returned from space to a new lair in the Hollywood hills where Number 2 (the highly under-appreciated Robert Wagner) has opened an evil talent agency. Agent being the perfect evil profession. 

Dr. Evil is once again ready to launch an evil scheme. However before Dr. Evil can finish his plan involving time travel to the 1970's, a tractor beam, and a meteor, the meeting is broken up by Austin Powers. Dr. Evil is arrested, leading to a Hannibal parody in which Austin needs Dr. Evil's help to find the man who has kidnapped his father played by the legendary Sir Michael Caine. Dr. Evil's newest henchman, Goldmember, is the culprit leading Austin to time travel to the 1970's to find Goldmember and save his father. While back in the 70's Austin hooks up with an old flame named Foxy Cleopatra (the surprisingly game Beyonce Knowles).

From there the film becomes a series of sometimes very funny skits that don't necessarily add up to much of a story. There is a great deal of obvious improv going on which is skillfully done by Myers and company but it ultimately detracts from the story, especially towards the end of the film which turns into a complete mess. At times it seems like ideas were thought of on the spot and weaved into the film as it was going on.

When the film is funny, it is very funny. However when it's not funny, the film is damn near impossible to watch. Especially unfunny is the film’s main conceit built around Austin's need for his father's approval. I don't know about you but I wasn't the least bit interested in knowing that Austin Powers was neglected by his father and frankly the whole storyline is a real downer in a film that should come nowhere near a downer.

The film is populated with big laughs and indeed when the film is funny it's funnier than any other film this year. But the script’s reliance on bits rehashed from the first two films fall intensely flat. Especially when the characters acknowledge the recycled jokes which borders on being too clever for it's own good. Especially unfunny cribbing from The Spy Who Shagged Me is Dr. Evil's rap set to Jay Z. The musical number isn't as funny as it is uncomfortable.

While my review may seem negative, and indeed there are a lot of things I didn't like, the film is still very funny. If the humor had been a little less scatological, and the story slightly more coherent, Goldmember could have been a classic. As it is it's an amusing but unmemorable comedy that is best to wait for on Video and DVD. Though judging by the box office that is a moot point.

On a side note shame on IMDB for giving away the names of the celebrity cameos. You could have waited a few weeks so that people could see it for themselves.

Movie Review K 19 The Widowmaker

K19: The Widowmaker 

Directed Kathryn Bigelow 

Written by Christopher Kyle 

Starring Harrison Ford, Liam Neeson, Peter Sarsgard 

Release Date July 19th, 2002

Published July 18th, 2002 

Few genres come with an atmosphere built in. Film noirs of the 1950's, with their smoke filled back rooms, guys in trenchcoats and femme fatales, is an example of a genre with built in atmosphere. Another genre with an atmosphere built right into it is the submarine film. When you see a sub movie you’re guaranteed many guys crammed into tight quarters and claustrophobic interiors where the walls are actually coming in on you.

The new Harrison Ford film K-19 expertly takes advantage of the built in atmosphere, using it to crank up the intensity of a film based on real life events.

It's 1961 and the Russians are gearing up to show the Americans they have nuclear strike capability. Unfortunately, according to the captain of the navy's one nuclear class sub, Captain Polenin (Liam Neeson), the boat isn't ready. Despite the boat's obvious technical problems the government orders the ship commissioned in 4 weeks for a run which will lead to the firing of a test missile within range of American spy planes. 

Of course if things went as planned there wouldn't be a movie. Captain Polenin's pleas for more time to fix the boat are ignored and Polenin is demoted to executive officer. Polenin is then replaced by Captain Vostokoff (Ford), a Captain known for his party loyalty and connections that are rumored to have earned him the prestigious post. The boat sails even after the ship's nuclear expert is fired for drunkenness and replaced by a green rookie right out the military academy.

Tensions flare between Polenin and Vostikoff after Vostikoff endangers the crew in order to test the boats limits. Unfortunately, the test may have led to the failure of the sub’s nuclear core. There is only one way to fix the reactor, send someone into the reactor itself and fix the problem by hand. Keep in mind we are talking about a nuclear reactor, where radiation can eat right through you. This leads to scenes of compelling bravery all the more sobering knowing that it is based on a true story.

All of these setup scenes are well staged as well as the action sequences which are extremely familiar to us as we near "crush depth". No depth charges though, likely a first for a sub movie. Even as familiar or even clichéd as these scenes are, director Kathryn Bigelow defly handles them, using the dramatic weight of her actors and some impressive special effects that take you outside the boat as if you were hanging onto the side of it.

Indeed Ford and Neeson have some familiar dialogue exchanges, questions of loyalty, competence and motives. Each actor however transcends these problems with their restrained and dignified presence. Ford and Neeson are imposing actors whose authority can be expressed with looks and manner. Peter Sarsgaard plays the green nuclear officer Vadim who, while struggling to hold onto his accent, still delivers a heroic performance.

Give credit to director Bigelow and her crew for casting actors able to garner our sympathy, considering they are portraying our enemies. The history lesson is sobering and the Cold War backdrop is well used to increase the tension. The ending leaves something to be desired as it overstays its welcome, but overall K-19 is a solid, dramatic, history lesson with fantastic performances.

Movie Review: Eight Legged Freaks Starring David Arquette

Eight Legged Freaks (2002) 

Directed by Ellory Elkayim

Written by Jesse Alexander

Starring David Arquette, Scarlett Johannson, Scott Terra, Doug E. Doug Rick Overton

Release Date July 17th, 2002 

Published July 16th, 2002 

I've never been afraid of spiders, well, except for that first Spiderman script to hit the net, that was pretty scary. Other than that though I have no fear of these disgusting creatures. Not that being afraid or unafraid of spiders will affect your viewing of the movie Eight Legged Freaks, I just needed an opening paragraph for this review.

Freaks stars David Arquette, a freak in his own right, as Chris Mccormick. The long missing son of a small town miner who recently passed away, Chris has returned to takeover his dad's mining business in hope of finding the gold his father swore was in those mines. Upon his return Chris once again strikes up a relationship with his high school crush Sam Parker who is now the town's Sheriff. 

It's been over ten years since they have seen each other and a lot has changed. Sam now has two kids a daughter named Ashley played by Scarlett Johannson and a son named Mike played by newcomer Scott Terra. It is Mike who sets the story in motion after visiting a friend who runs a Spider museum (an uncredited Tom Noonan) Mike discovers that the grasshoppers his friend has been feeding his spiders have been mutated by toxic waste spilled into the local creek. Mike soon finds his friend dead and giant spiders are the culprits.

At first no one believes him, no one believes little kids in these situations. Soon however pets begin disappearing, then local residents and finally the town is completely overrun.

The film is a modern take on the cheesy sci-fi of the 1950's and the film’s cheesy effects are a nice touch, making the film more comedy than horror film. The spiders look as fake as they would have in the 1950's. I hope that was what they were going for because if it wasn't then this film has serious problems. Working under the assumption that this was all intentional Eight Legged Freaks comes off as an often funny but plodding movie.

The supporting characters, most notably Doug E. Doug and Rick Overton, provide the film’s best laughs. But of course the movie’s best asset is the spiders, and when they aren't onscreen the film suffers. Eight Legged Freaks isn't bad but it's far from great. The spiders, while totally cheesy, are very funny. Unfortunately, they do wear out their welcome after the first hour or so. Simply, I liked this movie but I won't be seeing it again.

Movie Review Reign of Fire

Reign of Fire (2002) 

Directed by Rob Bowman

Written by Matt Greenberg

Starring Matthew McConaughey, Christian Bale, Isabella Scorupco, Gerard Butler 

Release Date July 12th, 2002 

Published July 11th, 2002 

Whilst I must quibble with the film Reign Of Fire being called a sci-fi film (indeed the film contains not one bit of science), what I can't argue with is that Reign Of Fire is a roller coaster ride, action thriller that kicks serious ass. As we join the story, a young boy is visiting his mother at her job on a construction site when some guys drilling a hole accidentally awaken a billion year old fire breathing dragon. Whoops!

The dragons are awake and after a couple million-year nap they are a little hungry, thus begins the near apocalypse. By the year 2020 the dragons are Earth’s dominant species while humans hide in caves and outwit the dragons to grow food and get supplies. The young boy from the beginning of the movie, Quinn (Christian Bale), is now grown up. Quinn is the leader of a ragtag group of humans living in what’s left of the English countryside.

An American army arrives, led by Van Zandt (Matthew McConaughey) and Alex (Iabella Scorupco). Van Zandt does what Quinn and his people have never dreamed of, they hunt and kill dragons. We are quickly treated to Van Zandt's hunting style in a spectacular set of mind-blowing effects scenes. Indeed Reign Of Fire is a special effects movie and the effects are fantastic, rendering very lifelike dragons and a surprisingly lifelike Scorupco.

There is, however, something deeper going on as director Rob Bowman, the man behind The X-Files movie, makes a film that is part western, part war movie. Bowman then tops it off with hints of Herman Melville's “Moby Dick” as McConaughey's Van Zandt's insane obsession with killing the lone male dragon with Quinn as his Ishmael.

McConaughey is a real standout in this film. He oozes machismo and charisma. His insanity is so engaging I would have followed him into battle for sure. Christian Bale is also good as the straight man; he doesn't get McConaughey's swaggering arrogance. Instead he is consummately British; intelligent, levelheaded, but always ready to fight.

I do have some trouble with some of the film’s logic. How when all of New York has been burned to the ground did Newsweek and Time magazine print their issues announcing global apocalypse? Also, if Time and Newsweek have time to print magazines, how is it scientists didn't have time to figure out the dragon's secret weakness? What matters most though is the action and Reign Of Fire more than delivers. Awesome special effects, amazing dragons and a lot of great action. Reign Of Fire is a huge summer movie surprise.

Movie Review Pumpkin

Pumpkin (2002) 

Directed by Anthony Abrams, Adam Larson Broder 

Written by Anthony Abrams, Adam Larson Broder

Starring Christina Ricci, Dominique Swain, Marisa Coughlan

Release Date June 28th, 2002 

Published November 10th, 2002

For anyone who has never been to college or at least visited a college campus, the terms Sorority and Fraternity are likely mere pop culture. In reality, the pop culture treatment of these odd institutions does not do them justice.

Fraternities and Sororities are actually weirder than they have been portrayed. These conformity factories for the elitist culture are a strange mix of depravity and morality. They each combine odd rituals and out of control behavior with a social conscience that includes charity work. One night guys are spanking each other with a wood paddle, the next day they are picking up garbage on the side of the road.

In a Sorority, the rituals aren't as sadomasochistic in nature but just as weird with singing, chanting, dancing and other liturgy. The film Pumpkin has yet another pop culture treatment of the sorority world and its biting wit on the subject makes for one of the funniest movies of the year.

Pumpkin stars Christina Ricci as top sorority gal Carolyn McDuffy. She is the house pep leader and the model for the rushes, the girls trying to get in the sorority. Carolyn and her house leader Julie (Marisa Coughlin) are determined to win S.O.Y, Sorority of the Year. To win they have to show they can do community service so they volunteer to help "special" kids train for an athletic competition. Each member of the sorority is paired with a "special" kid and Carolyn is paired with Pumpkin (Hank Harris).

At first, we believe Pumpkin is both mentally and physically handicapped, he arrives in a wheelchair though he can walk. Pumpkin is immediately dumbstruck by Carolyn who is the most beautiful girl he's ever seen and probably the first he's ever touched. Carolyn wants only to quit her charity work and go back to important things like shopping and spending time with her vapid Ken-doll boyfriend played brilliantly by Sam Ball. 

In a scene that you're ashamed to laugh at, Carolyn attempts to teach Pumpkin how to throw the javelin as Pumpkin tries to find the words to tell Carolyn how he feels. Pumpkin's struggle for words and Carolyn’s embarrassing attempts to understand him makes for very uncomfortable humor. For Pumpkin, it's love at first sight. For Carolyn, it's something she can't comprehend. There is something in Pumpkin's eyes that she has never seen before.

Nothing about Pumpkin is simple, this strange mix of earnest romance and biting satire walks the line between good taste and offensiveness. If you are sensitive about the treatment of the handicapped, you might want to avoid this film. Pumpkin bravely wades into this thorny issue and lets loose a barrage of bad taste humor that, while funny, makes anyone watching just a little uncomfortable.

Pumpkin's shifts in tone from biting satire to earnest romance stretches credibility, leaving the audience to wonder whether to take the film seriously or not. The film wants to be edgy and satirical but also wants you to believe the romance that grows between Carolyn and Pumpkin is for real. Were it not for Ricci's skilled performance and Harris's charismatic willingness to go all the way to every extreme with Pumpkin, the whole film would likely collapse on itself.

Co-directors Anthony Abrams and Adam Larson Broder, each in their directorial debut, walk that line of credibility with bravery and sharpness. Their willingness to trust Ricci and Harris' performances and make it difficult to believe their romance is real is a decision not many directors would have the courage to do. And in the end, to send up everything the movie has built up to with one ingenious line of dialogue is truly brilliant.

What truly makes Pumpkin one of the best comedies of the year was the ability of Abrams and Broder, who also wrote the script, to create a mini-universe for these characters to exist in. By doing that they can control the context of the jokes and are free to take chances. And take chances with a bold comedy that I highly recommend. 

Movie Review Mr. Deeds

Mr. Deeds (2002) 

Directed by Steven Brill

Written by Tim Herlihy

Starring Adam Sandler, Winona Ryder, John Turturro, Peter Gallagher, Jared Harris, Allan Covert 

Release Date June 28th, 2002 

Published June 27th, 2002

In 1934 the legendary Gary Cooper starred in Frank Capra's Mr. Deeds Goes to Town. Nearly 70 years later the film has been remade with the Gary Cooper role now filled by Adam Sadler. Did someone say the decline of western civilization? Well I wouldn't go so far as to say that this is the film that will destroy our culture. In fact, as much as I hate to admit it, Sandler's Mr. Deeds isn't that bad.

Deeds stars Sandler in his usual dopey earnest character. As Longfellow Deeds Sandler is a pizza shop owner in a small, New Hampshire town. Deed's also happens to be the sole heir to the fortune of his long lost uncle. The fortune is a company worth in excess of 40 billion dollars. Deeds however couldn't care less as he is more excited about the free trip to New York.

Peter Gallagher is the film’s formula bad guy out to dupe our hero into handing the company over to him. Also trying to take advantage of Deeds is a TV tabloid show. The show’s producer Babe (Winona Ryder) goes undercover and begins dating Deeds and secretly filming him for the show, leading to an hysterical cameo by John McEnroe. Well of course the formula dictates all that happens. Babe has a change of heart and falls in love for real, evil will be punished, and the company will be saved. The plot is meaningless.

Well of course it's meaningless, this is an Adam Sandler movie. The plot is merely in place to lend a little context to the jokes. What is most surprising is how funny those jokes are. Sandler and his supporting cast, which includes not only Rider and Gallagher, but also John Turturro and Steve Buscemi, all contribute some very funny moments, A lot of which is great physical humor.

I was honestly ashamed at how much I laughed during this film. I tried not to laugh, but I couldn't. Especially in scenes with Steve Buscemi as the guy with the crazy eyes. And then there is Sandler. He has always reminded me of an old friend of mine named Decker. Decker was never the sharpest knife in the drawer, but he was the guy to call if you ever had a problem. Sandler has that same “give you the shirt off his back” earnestness.

Maybe the key to his appeal is the fact that Sandler doesn't seem like a movie star. Instead he seems like a guy you could actually know. He has a goofy charm and friendliness that is easy to enjoy at least in short bursts.

Movie Review Sunshine State

Sunshine State (2002) 

Directed by John Sayles 

Written by John Sayles 

Starring Jane Alexander, Angela Bassett, Bill Cobbs, Edie Falco, Timothy Hutton, Mary Steenburgen

Release Date June 21st, 2002 

Published June 21st, 2002 

Writer-director John Sayles is the prototype independent filmmaker. He's even been referred to as the Godfather of the independent film. For more than 20 years, Sayles has been making his films his way, with tremendous artistic success and modest box office. Along the way, Sayles has picked up awards, critical plaudits and sorts-of praise. None of that has altered his way of making movies. Sayles has never succumbed to mainstream moviemaking and he's never been co-opted by the studio system. Sayles exists on his own filmmaking plane. His latest work is yet another work of independence called Sunshine State.

State tells the multiple interlocking stories of the people living on the fictional plantation island off the coast of Florida. Formerly a bustling community of semi-affluent African-American and small business owners, Plantation Island is now feeling the encroachment of modern America in the form of big business real estate developers. As we join the story, developers have already begun to dominate the island save for two small communities. In the predominantly African American community of Lincoln Beach, times are tough and the residents are ripe to be picked off by the real estate developers. Not everyone is so quick to move however, especially Dr. Lloyd (Bill Cobbs) who leads the only resistance to the developers.

Dr. Lloyd is living with Eunice Stokes (Mary Alice), another longtime resident of Lincoln Beach not keen on moving. Mrs. Stokes however has more pressing concerns as her daughter Desiree and husband Reggie have arrived from out of town. Eunice has a secret and needs to reconcile with her estranged daughter, not only for herself but also for her young nephew Terrell.

Paralleling that story is that of Marly Temple, a Hotel and Restaurant owner being pursued by developers who want to turn her small businesses into a thriving mini-mall. Marly is quite tempted to sell but can't because her ailing father (Ralph Waite) who though retired from the business, urges her to hold onto the business he started.

Each story plays out as the city that surrounds them is celebrating a citywide festival organized by Fracine Pickney, a silly housewife played by Mary Steenburgen. She is so wrapped up in making a great parade she fails to notice her husband’s (NYPD Blue’s Gordon Clapp) multiple attempts at suicide.

A group of golfers act as the bookends of the film, led by comedian Alan King as the head of the development company trying to buy the island. King has two sensational speeches, one at the beginning of the film and one at the end that tie the story together in its most simple form.

There are so many characters in Sunshine State and so many little connections between each character it would be impossible to explain each of them. The connections are well explained and meaningful, and come together to paint a beautiful picture. A picture of a group of people living their lives and the life that has grown up around them.

At first it seems that Sayles is going to make a statement movie about the environment and evil big business corporate villains. However, by the end of the film Sayles’ broader themes become clear. Corporate greed and social issues are parts of the lives being lived in Sunshine State, but Sayles is far more interested in how those lives are lived. 

Sayles draws intelligent realistic characters that are well spoken and interesting. The scripting is intricate and ingenious, and Sunshine State is simply a joy to watch. A film that respects the intelligence of the audience enough to make a movie that doesn't work in broad strokes, but rather in subtlety. Words that are far more important than action. Humor that comes from reality instead of forced punch lines. While the film’s pace may be a little leisurely at times the performances and dialogue are strong enough that even the most belabored scenes hold the audience's attention.

John Sayles movies do not compromise, they never come off as market-tested. As such, they are nearly impossible to classify by genre. They are simply well made intelligent films. Sunshine State may in fact be John Sayles best film to date.

Movie Review: American Psycho 2: All American Girl

American Psycho 2: All American Girl (2002) 

Directed by Morgan J. Freeman

Written by Karen Craig, Alex Sanger 

Starring Mila Kunis, William Shatner, Lindy Booth 

Release Date June 18th, 2002 

Published June 18th, 2002 

Bret Easton Ellis is one twisted SOB. His novel American Psycho, adapted for the screen in 2000 starring Christian Bale, is a twisted pop culture salad of axe murders and pop references to Huey Lewis and the News, Genesis and Whitney Houston. The film version, while not as good as the book (they never are,) benefited from having a stellar indie cast including Bale, Jared Leto, Reese Witherspoon and Chloe Sevigny. 

The sequel, on the other hand, has William Shatner. 

The sequel’s connection to the original is so insignificant that I need not mention it, let's just say it provides the lead with her very thin motivation. The lead in American Psycho 2 is “That 70's Show's” Mila Kunis. As Rachael Newman, Kunis is a psychotically ambitious college student hell-bent on getting a teacher’s assistant job that will almost guarantee her getting into the FBI. The teacher, Robert Starkman (Shatner), is a former FBI agent who's final case was the Bateman killings, which remain unsolved. Standing in Rachael's way are 3 students so insignificantly painted that I need not describe them. Needless to say they are easily dispatched. 

For some inconceivable reason Rachael decides to see a psychiatrist in the middle of her killing spree. She isn't there to confess, but rather to provide clues so that later on the psychiatrist played by Garant Wyn Davies can be the hero and try to solve the crime. Whether he solves it or not I won't say, though it doesn't really matter. By the end of American Psycho 2 the whole thing is so superfluous and the mystery so ridiculous you couldn't force yourself to care. 

Kunis is badly miscast. She lacks the menacing sexuality of a Rose McGowan or the pop culture bitch cred of a Shannen Doherty, both of whom might have made for a more interesting film. The original American Psycho was an amalgam of pop culture and psychotic ax wielding, especially memorable was Bateman's dispatching of a victim while extolling the virtues of Huey Lewis & the News as “Hip To Be Square” played in the background. The sequel has none of that flair. It is essentially just a slasher movie and a bit of ripoff. 

Does anyone recall the movie Getting In with Kristy Swanson and Matthew Perry? Same idea, psycho killer taking out the competition for a coveted scholarship. Sequels are usually bad enough without being a ripoff. 

Movie Review: Windtalkers

Windtalkers (2002) 

Directed by John Woo 

Written by John Rice

Starring Nicolas Cage, Adam Beach, Mark Ruffalo, Peter Stormare, Christian Slater, Noah Emmerich

Release Date June 14th, 2002 

Published June 13th, 2002 

War is hell and now so is watching war movies. The drive towards more realistic violence have made for some very hard-to-watch films. Saving Private Ryan set the standard, followed by films like Enemy At The Gates, We Were Soldiers, Black Hawk Down and most recently John Woo’s Windtalkers. Though it purports to be about Navajo Indian code talkers, Windtalkers as they were called, the film is actually about violence and war movie clichés. 

Nicolas Cage stars in Windtalkers as Joe Enders, a borderline crazy marine. When we are first introduced to Joe he is attempting to hold a position that is, to the rest of his platoon, already lost. Joe’s entire platoon is killed but he survives and returns to battle with a new assignment. Joe is to ship out to Saipan where he and his platoon will protect the military's new secret weapon, a pair of Navajo Indians whose native language is used as code to transmit Japanese troop movements without the Japanese being able to spy on it. 

The Navajo soldiers are Ben (Adam Beach) and Whitehorse (Roger Willie). Rounding out the platoon is your typical cast of recognizable character actors whose names become interchangeable though their faces are semi-recognizable. Christian Slater, Mark Ruffalo, Peter Stormare, and Noah Emmerich, amongst others, are the interchangeable soldiers.

Director John Woo is the absolute wrong choice to direct this film. With his penchant for stylistic violence, Woo forgets that the story is the code talkers and not video game style pyro technics. Adam Beach and Roger Willie get the short shrift from a story that would be better served by a smaller budget and a more centralized script. If the film would have focused more on the development of the code and the Navajo characters the story would be far more interesting. Of course it would have been far less commercial.

My guess is that the original story was about the code talkers but producers with dollar signs in their eyes got a hold of it, signed on big name star Cage and big name director Woo and put aside the real story in favor of one that played up Cage’s character. Once again, typical Hollywood greed ruins a good story. Navajo Code talkers were real, and the code they created helped the U.S win the war in the Pacific. There is a really good story to be told about them, Windtalkers is not it. -

Movie Review Scooby Doo

Scooby Doo (2002) 

Directed by Raja Gosnell

Written by James Gunn 

Starring Freddie Prinze Jr., Sarah Michelle Geller, Linda Cardellini, Matthew Lillard, Rowan Atkinson

Release Date June 14th, 2002

Published June 14th, 2002 

I came into this review all set to bemoan art in films, Hollywood's lack of creativity and why producers can't find original projects and so on. Then I saw the movie, and while I could still complain about all of those things, I have to be honest and say on some level I enjoyed this product of Hollywood's inability to be original.

As the story begins, we join our heroes Fred (Freddie Prinze of Darkness), Daphne (Sarah Buffy Geller), Velma(Linda Cardellini), Shaggy (Matthew Lillard) and the most famous Great Dane in the world, Scooby Doo. After doing battle with a ghost in Pamela Anderson's toy factory (yes that Pamela Anderson), the gang unmasks a janitor posing as a ghost. Another case solved by mystery Inc., except when approached by the press, Fred takes all the credit. Velma gets upset and quits, so does Daphne, and the gang is no more.

Two years later, Scooby and Shaggy are living in the Mystery Machine when they are approached by a messenger offering them money and all they can eat if they will come to the Spooky Island amusement park and solve a mystery. Fred, Velma and Daphne have also received invites and the gang is reunited. The film is as simplistic as its setup, with simple messages about friendship and teamwork that are aimed at the preschool audience. There are a couple of good chuckles for adults, such as subtle references to Shaggy's pot smoking and numerous send-ups of the cartoons classic setups.

The casting is pretty bad save for Matthew Lillard who was the perfect choice for Shaggy. He provides most of the film’s best laughs with his physical humor. Freddy Prinze Jr., to criticize him would be pointless so I'll move on. Linda Cardillini as Velma seems uncomfortable throughout the film struggling to ape the cartoon voice and manner of her cartoon counterpart. Sarah Michele Gellar as Daphne may have seemed like a good choice but after performing as long as she has on TV's best show (personal opinion) she looked bored by this material that is obviously beneath her. 

The CGI Scooby turned out surprisingly well. After the first trailer I thought he was going to look creepy. In the film, however, Scooby is well realized and the actors do a good job playing against a character that wasn't really there. Lillard had the most scenes opposite Scooby and he does a great job, it was probably easy for him, after working so often with Freddie Prinze he is used to talking to vacant spaces. I know, cheap shots.

One of the charms of the Hanna Barbera cartoon was that every episode was exactly the same. The film version does a good job at sending up those setups while still living into them. But don't be mistaken, Scooby Doo is a kid’s movie. It's meant for those between the ages of 3 and 12. And on that level Scooby is a partial success

Movie Review The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys

The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys (2002) 

Directed by Peter Care 

Written by Michael Petroni 

Starring Kieran Culkin, Emile Hirsch, Jena Malone, Jodie Foster 

Release Date June 14th, 2002 

Published November 10th, 2002 

What is your favorite childhood memory? For me it was making out with my first girlfriend Dawn. I was 12; she was 11 and every Tuesday her mother would bring her over while she played cards with my parents. Dawn and I would sneak off to a gorgeous spot right on the Mississippi River bank. The Dangerous Lives Of Altar Boys is one of those films that will make you nostalgic for your childhood, your first love, your best friends, and those moments that only you and those childhood friends will remember.

The film centers around four friends, Tim (Kieran Culkin), Francis (Emile Hirsch), Wade (Jake Richardson) and Joey (Tyler Long). The focus is on their love of comic books and their loathing of their catholic school teacher Sister Assumpta (Jodie Foster). The boys visualize themselves as comic book superheroes and their fantasies are played out in cartoon vignettes throughout the film. Things begin to change for the boys as Francis begins his first relationship with a girl, Margie, played by the lovely Jena Malone. As Francis and Margie's relationship grows, his friends’ sense they are losing their best friend, Tim especially feels he is losing his best friend.

As a way of reasserting their friendship, Tim gets an idea to take revenge on Sister Assumpta for all the trouble she has caused them. The elaborate plan calls for the guys to steal a cougar from a local zoo and unleash it in Sister Assumpta's office. Francis, Wade and Joey go along at first not realizing how serious Tim is about his over the top revenge scheme. In the meantime, Francis is dealing with Margie and her very serious home issues including alleged sexual abuse by her older brother who is a classmate of Francis.

The shocking details of the abuse would seem to be more than any teenager could deal with but Francis isn't an average teenager. Francis reacts to the many revelations from Margie at first like anyone would but his limitless kindness and gentle nature lead him to more philosophical conclusions than you would expect from someone his age. For the most part Francis retreats into his comic fantasies, incorporating his real life torments into his comic drawings and stories.

The film travels a twisted road of comedy and drama and is quite reminiscent of the movie Stand By Me in it's camaraderie between these four young guys and their ever quickening emotional growth. A tragedy near the end of the film makes sense emotionally and intellectually rather than seeming like a shallow heart string tug.

In the hands of a less skilled director, this material could have been a treacle mess. Veteran video director Peter Care, who has worked with the likes of REM, treads the line between smart comedy and drama very carefully. Care never allows his teenage characters to seem smarter than the adult types we get in so many other teen comedies and especially on TV.

Hirsch’s performance really made an impact on me. Looking like the younger brother of Adrien Grenier with his round soulful eyes and olive skin, Hirsch's look projects a budding intelligence necessary to make characters like Francis work. It is a great time for Independent film. My top ten end of the year list is likely to be dominated by them. Will The Dangerous Lives Of Altar Boys be on that list? We will see, it will surely come close.

Movie Review: Bad Company

Bad Company (2002) 

Directed by Joel Schumacher

Written by Jason Richman 

Starring Chris Rock, Anthony Hopkins, Gabriel Macht

Release Date June 7th, 2002

Published June 6th, 2002 

Anyone who has ever written a screenplay knows one of the hardest parts is coming up with a title. Back in 2000 Jerry Bruckheimer thought that when he bankrolled a mismatched, fish out of water, buddy, action comedy that the film had a perfect title. That title was Black Sheep. Bruckheimer had forgotten that just three years earlier Chris Farley and David Spade starred in a god-awful comedy of the same title. So the title was changed, however, the new title now seems just as curious. 

Bad Company is the title of at least a dozen films, one of which was a spy movie made in 1990 starring Laurence Fishburne and Ellen Barkin. Curiously that film is just like the new Bad Company, about CIA agents. Of course the fact that I have spent the first few paragraphs of this review writing about the title of the film should indicate how I felt about this latest Bad Company.

Chris Rock stars in dual roles, the first being an undercover CIA agent who is killed in the former Czech Republic in an arms deal gone bad. The second role is that of the CIA agent’s estranged twin brother Jake Hayes. After his twin brother’s death, Jake is recruited by the CIA to replace him and complete the arms deal. Jake is not surprisingly reluctant to team with the CIA and his brother’s former partner Oakes (Sir Anthony Hopkins). After finances are discussed, Jake eagerly takes up his brother’s cause.

This, of course leads to one of those typical fish out of water sequences where the low class character has to learn to be high class and do so in very little time. Jake needs to know which fork to use at a fancy dinner and needs to learn how to dress, walk and speak. It's a scene cribbed from a dozen other formula fish out of water comedies and not improved upon here. 

Once Jake is ready he is taken to the Czech Republic to do the deal, but wouldn't you know it, the same guys who killed his brother are already waiting for Jake and the CIA and the deal goes bad. The nuclear weapon that was the subject of the deal is stolen and moved to New York City, and somehow Jake's girlfriend is kidnapped. I'm sure there was a good reason for how the bad guys figured out Jake wasn't his brother but I was so bored with Bad Company by this point I didn't care.

It's not surprising to find this formula swill was directed by Joel Schumacher, the king of formula swill. (I should note my still simmering bitterness towards the man who destroyed the Batman series). What is surprising is seeing two actors as talented as Sir Anthony Hopkins and Chris Rock in such a conventional film. From the script to the screen, I can't imagine they couldn't see how formulaic and trite this material was. 

Rock deserves a lot of credit for going off the script as often as he does, providing the only solace from the lame formula with bits taken from his standup act and his natural wit. Sir Anthony Hopkins on the other hand makes it clear that he is merely picking up a check sleepwalking through the entire film, especially it's lamest of all ending. 

It would be very easy for me to blame Joel Schumacher for this formula trash but the real fault lies with Jerry Bruckheimer. He after all is the one who keeps financing this supposedly crowd pleasing, screen tested trash. Bruckheimer knows formula swill because he and his late partner Don Simpson invented it.

Movie Review: Undercover Brother

Undercover Brother (2002) 

Directed by Malcolm D. Lee 

Written by John Ridley 

Starring Eddie Griffin, Denise Richards, Dave Chappelle, Aunjanue Ellis, Gary Anthony Williams, Neil Patrick Harris, Billy Dee Williams

Release Date May 31st 2002 

Published May 30th, 2002

Eddie Griffin is a fantastic standup comedian, with what may be the best Michael Jackson impression on the planet. As an actor however Griffin has yet to find himself. Griffin's acting resume includes 2001's worst film Double Take and worst film candidate 2002 The New Guy. Now with his new film Undercover Brother, Griffin has found himself in what may be the funniest movie of the year.

Griffin is the titular Undercover Brother, a 70's throwback to the era of Blaxploitation who takes it upon himself to steal from the rich and give to the poor inner city black folks. As one character puts it he's a "Soul Train reject with a Robin Hood complex". After breaking into a bank and destroying the mortgages of poor people who couldn't afford to pay, UC is recruited by the Brotherhood. The Brotherhood is an underground organization dedicated to the protection of black culture from the evil ministrations of "The Man". 

It's headed up by the Chief (Chi McBride), and his top agents, Sistah Girl (smokin hot Aunjenue Ellis) and Conspiracy Brother (comedy's secret weapon Dave Chappelle). Also on the team are the computer expert Smart Brother (Gary Anthony Williams) and white boy intern Lance (Doogie Howser's Neil Patrick Harris), affirmative action hire. Undercover Brother teams with the Brotherhood to save a black presidential candidate played by Billy Dee Williams who has fallen under the control of the Man and now instead of running for office, he plans to open a chain of Fried Chicken Restaurant's complete with grits, greens and a complimentary 40 ounce malt liquor.

That's just a sample of Director Malcolm Lee and writer John Ridley's satire of African American stereotypes, they have far more satiric jabs for white people including swipes at white people's love of the show Friends and their peculiar love of mayonnaise. One of the best satirical moments is the send up of the black man's weakness for white women as Undercover Brother is seduced by the evil White She Devil (Denise Richards).

Chris Kattan rounds out the cast as The Man's evil henchman Mr. Feathers, and the film does the seemingly impossible, it's makes both Kattan and Eddie Griffin funny! Undercover Brother's showdown with Mr. Feathers toward the end of the film, set to Michael Jackson's Beat It, is absolutely hysterical, making use of Griffin's years of dance training and Kattan's completely inept attempt at dancing.

While the film cribs heavily from Austin Powers; hysterically out-of-date hero and over-the-top gags, if your going to steal you might as well steal from a good movie. The film also owes a great deal to other satirical looks at race relations and Afro American culture, from the films of Spike Lee to Eriq Lasalle's little seen Gem The Drop Squad and the Wayans brothers brilliant Blaxploitation send up I'm Gonna Git You Sucka. Spike Lee, by the way, is Director Malcolm Lee's cousin, and while Malcolm doesn't have Spike's social conscience he has his sense of humor and it is well tuned in Undercover Brother.

For the first time in a long time we get a comedy that is actually FUNNY. I can barely remember the last Hollywood film that was as consistently funny as Undercover Brother. It’s all due to the confident lead performance of Eddie Griffin, the smoking hot performances of Richards and Ellis, and the well-played satire of Director Lee and Writer John Ridley, on whose web cartoon the film is based. Undercover Brother is an early candidate for the Best Comedy of 2002. And with the comedies Hollywood usually makes you might pencil it in as the winner now.