Movie Review: The Marine

The Marine (2006) 

Directed by John Bonito 

Written by Michelle Gallagher, Alan B McElroy 

Starring John Cena, Kelly Carlson, Robert Patrick 

Release Date October 13th, 2006 

Published October 12th, 2006 

WWE films has been in business for just about a year with two features under their belt. The model seems to be Lionsgate or the former Miramax genre arm Dimension. Cheap genre pictures that succeed or fail by the popularity of the WWE superstar assigned the starring role. The first WWE feature See No Evil starring Glen 'Kane' Jacobs cost a mere 15 million dollars to make and is headed for DVD soon already having made returns on its small budget.

The latest WWE feaure, The Marine, is a bigger deal for the WWE because this one stars the standard bearer of the company, World Champion John Cena. Once again the film is a cheaply made genre picture whose key is turning out WWE fans, regardless of whether the film is yet another Ed Wood quality sub-drive in movie.

In Iraq 2006 three marines have been taken hostage and Sgt. John Triton (John Cena) has discovered where they are being held. Though he is ordered to await backup, Triton takes it upon himself to rescue the hostages. Returning safely to base, Triton is a hero but his violation of a direct order has forced commanders to give him a dishonorable discharge.

Returning to his civilian life, with his beautiful wife Kate (Kelly Carlson), Triton finds the life of a regular joe just doesn't agree with him. After John gets fired from his first job, on his first day, his wife suggests they  take a road trip. This fateful decision finds John and Kate at an out of the way gas station in South Carolina just as a group of diamond thieves, lead by Rome (Robert Patrick), have arrived with the cops on their tail. When the thieves engage the cops and kill three people they go on to take Kate hostage. Now John Triton must use his marine training to track down and kill the bad guys and rescue his wife.

The Marine is an old school, 80's style action picture that fires copious amounts of bullets and blows up anything in its path. However, because the film is hemmed in by a PG-13 rating; much of the fun of this level of carnage is left on the cutting room floor. What is left on the screen is a goofy faux action picture that leaves star John Cena dangling in the wind employing his wrestling skills to provide the films only jolts of fun.

Cena, the current WWE champion, is not a great actor. That could probably be taken for granted but his limitations become clear by the fact that though he is the star of the picture, Cena has fewer lines than top bad guy Robert Patrick and even Patrick's goofball henchmen played by Jerome Ehlers and Anthony Ray Parker. It's clear that the edit of The Marine was engineered to hide Cena's shortcomings as an actor and that meant cutting as much of his dialogue as possible. 

There is so little that Cena can do onscreen, aside from run and fight, that the minor henchman played by Anthony Ray Parker is given as much screen time and even a bizarre monologue. Parker is given a scene all to himself, early in the picture, the subject of which is his love of racial conspiracy and his hatred of rock candy. How awful must Cena have truly been that director John Bonito felt Parker's scenes should be left in and much of Cena's dialogue was cut.

There is little appeal to The Marine beyond kitsch and a touch of nostalgia. There is a distinct Ed Wood or even early Russ Meyer quality to The Marine that is entertaining in a so bad it's good kind of way. Had the filmmakers had the guts to give the film a slightly bigger body count and some naked female flesh we could be talking about a camp classic. There is a nostalgia for the old school 80's action flick, ala Commando or Rambo 2 & 3, that some might find charming in an ironic way.

Robert Patrick does goose the film a bit with a performance reminiscent of Christopher Walken at his most loopy but without the self awareness. Patrick is actually committed to this goofball performance where Walken always has the slightest wink to let the audience know that he's in on the joke. Patrick is not in on the joke that is The Marine and thus, though he is at times bizarrely entertaining, he looks as foolish as the rest of the cast and crew of The Marine.

A hint of self awareness; a slight level of intended kink, and maybe there could be some hope for The Marine. Unfortunately, the film is played straight as if it were a semi-serious attempt to thrill action audiences. That does give the film a slight kitsch appeal but the film is not smarmy enough to take advantage of the kitsch. That leaves just a bunch of explosions and the WWE champion who is not unappealing but should probably limit his acting to faking punches in the ring.