Movie Review Men in Black International

Men in Black International (2019) 

Directed by F. Gary Gray 

Written by Art Marcum, Matt Holloway 

Starring Tessa Thompson, Chris Hemsworth, Emma Thompson, Liam Neeson, Rafe Spall 

Release Date June 14th, 2019 

Published June 13th, 2019 

Men in Black International stars Tessa Thompson as Molly. As a kid, Molly witnessed the mythic Men in Black neuralyzer her parents after their home was invaded by an alien. Molly avoided the mind erasing and developed a single-minded obsession with finding aliens and becoming part of the Men in Black. Cut to adult Molly and she is still seeking the Men in Black. She has dedicated her life to finding her way into the super-secret secret agency and her opportunity has finally arrived.

Molly uses her computer hacking skills to locate an alien that is returning to Earth, with a nod to the Weekly World News tabloid, a callback to the original 1997 movie which posited tabloid alien stories as real stories. Molly's investigation stumbles over the MIB HQ and she invites herself inside. Once inside, after a chat with Emma Thompson’s MIB boss, a character introduced in MIB3, she gets Molly a probationary gig as an agent.

As Agent M, Molly is assigned a task in the London office where she will be partnered with long-time agent, Agent H (Chris Hemsworth). Agent H is a bit of a washout. Something happened the last time that he saved the world and he’s never really recovered. Since then, he’s bounced around from case to case, narrowly avoiding being killed and generally being a pain in the backside for his boss and former partner, Agent T (Liam Neeson), cheekily referred to as High T.

Together, Agents M and H go on a worldwide whirlwind that takes the duo from London to Morocco, to the lair of a criminal dealing in Alien technology, Riza, played by Rebecca Ferguson, and to Paris where the Eiffel Tower serves as a bridge for the worst aliens in the world to attempt an invasion that is being coordinated by a rogue MIB agent. M and H must find the rogue Agent and prevent the alien invasion while overcoming M’s inexperience and H’s broken spirit.

The story I have described for Men in Black International sounds like a story that should work. The arcs are clear with M pursuing her dream and overcoming her inexperience and H seeking redemption while not being sure of what needs redeeming. It’s not a special story but if you build in good gags and solid action and effects, this is a good enough structure to support them. Sadly, director F Gary Gray brings absolutely nothing new or fresh or funny to his take on MIB.

Men in Black International differs from the original, 1997 Men in Black by not being particularly funny. Neither Thompson or Hemsworth appears interested in being funny, each appears to be waiting for the movie around them to be funny and it never happens. Kumail Nanjiani, playing an alien, nicknamed Pawny, is the closest thing to a character that is genuinely funny but the laughs remain few and far between.

The only innovation that the makers of Men In Black International bring to bear on the MIB franchise is moving the action from New York City to London and several other international locations. Beyond that, the aesthetic of Men in Black has not changed much in 22 years. The ending of the first Men in Black had more innovation than this modern sequel and all that did was update the suits to high fashion and put Will Smith in a more modern car.

If anything, Men in Black International is a step backward for the franchise. That’s odd since the MIB3 literally traveled into the past and felt more modern than International. Men in Black International looks like Men in Black in every way which is fine for a sequel but the movie doesn’t innovate on the franchise in any way. Without bringing something fresh to the franchise and without being funny, Men in Black International struggles to justify its very existence.

Men in Black International is a bizarre failure. We know that Tessa Thompson and Chris Hemsworth are funny, we saw that in Thor Ragnarok. And yet, there is no evidence of their humor in Men in Black International. Thompson is remote and occasionally withdrawn, delivering a perfunctory approximation of the uninspired script. Hemsworth meanwhile, rehashes pretty boy cliches that weren’t all that funny in Ghostbusters or the Vacation reboot and certainly don’t feel fresh here.

Men in Black International is professionally made. The film looks as if it should be entertaining. There is nothing wrong from a cinematography or design perspective and yet the movie is lifeless. The cast is going through the motions of a story that isn’t anything special and without any big laughs, Men in Black International just lingers on screen going through the motions of a very average action movie.

A good example of the failure and lack of inspiration in Men in Black International are the film's villains. Les Twins, Laurent and Larry Bourgeois play characters literally referred to as Alien Twin 1 and 2. The pair is known for their innovative dance videos on YouTube and yet we get barely a sample of what makes the twins special. A scene in a nightclub is intended to give them a showcase but the scene is clumsily shot and the dancing is blink and you will miss it. 

The twist is that a rogue MIB agent is the true big bad which explains why the Twins have no real characters to play but then why include them at all? The inclusion of Les Twins in Men in Black International is further evidence of the mercenary, marketing driven motivation behind this lifeless, soulless rehash of a well known property. The makers of Men in Black International hired Les Twins for their high social media profile and not to actually use them to serve a story being told. 

Why was this movie made? If the makers of Men in Black International had nothing new to say with this inventive premise then why did they make this movie? It appears to have been a purely mercenary effort on all sides. Everyone in the cast and crew appears to have been on hand solely to pick up a paycheck and deliver the absolute minimum effort with the only goal being to capitalize on a well known intellectual property.

Movie Review Men in Black 2

Men in Black 2 (2002) 

Directed by Barry Sonnenfeld 

Written by Robert Gordon, Barry Fanaro 

Starring Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Rosario Dawson, Lara Flynn Boyle, Johnny Knoxville 

Release Date July 3rd, 2002 

Published July 2nd, 2002 

The original Men In Black was a fresh and funny surprise. The film came out of nowhere and based on its charm and its appealing stars, the film scored 600+ million dollars at the box office. Charm, however, can carry a film only so far and it is no match for the disease known as sequelitis. If you think about it I bet you could count the number of good sequels on one hand. Sequelitis is why almost all sequels suck. Even the great Will Smith seems no match for it.

MIB2 has Smith and Tommy Lee Jones back in their black suits and Ray Bans. Of course if you recall the original, Jones' agent K was neuralized and returned to a normal life. Smith as Agent J is investigating the murder of an alien by another alien who has taken the form of Lara Flynn Boyle. Only K knows the secret to stopping this new alien threat. 

So J and his new partner Frank the Dog go to a small Massachusetts town where K is now a postal worker, a situation ripe for comedy but not taken advantage of in this film. Once K is returned to headquarters he is to be de-neuralized, but once he gets his memory back he still can't remember what happened to the object that the bad guys are looking for. K's memory block is the film’s only clever subplot as the duo search the clues K left for himself in case of such an emergency.

Where the original MIB had a bouncy pace with a new surprise around every corner MIB 2 has just the opposite; dull, lifeless transitional scenes that lead nowhere. There are no surprises in the alien creatures created by the effects team and the legendary Rick Baker. It's probably George Lucas's fault, his aliens are so visually interesting that most everything else pales in comparison. Lucas's Star Wars creatures make MIB 2's aliens look like the work of amateurs.

The biggest disappointment about MIB 2 is director Barry Sonnenfeld who directs the film with a dull cynicism. The film is constructed of dull transitory scenes broken up every 5 or 10 minutes by a special effect, probably to keep the audience from falling asleep. The film plays like a commercial for itself. The few laughs of the film are easy to cut out and put into a commercial or a trailer, with no need for context or much of a setup.

The film is well crafted but not memorable. MIB 2 is the kind of film that five years from now will be airing on TBS Superstation; you’ll stop for a moment then change the channel when a commercial comes on and maybe flick back later to see if it's still on.

Movie Review Memoirs of a Geisha

Memoirs of a Geisha (2005) 

Directed by Rob Marshall 

Written by Robin Swicord 

Starring Zhang Ziyi, Ken Watanabe, Michelle Yeoh, Koji Yakusho

Release Date December 9th, 2005 

Published February 4th, 2006

Perceptions are often fascinating. Take the perception of the Geisha in America. Because of American soldiers who occupied Japan post world war 2, we perceive a geisha to be a Japanese prostitute. That is not true. A geisha is an artist, a trained entertainer and conversationalist whose time is purchased by clients in need of a business facilitator. A geisha provides companionship of the highest order. Another interesting perception involves the movie Memoirs of A Geisha. When Steven Spielberg was attached as the film's director, Memoirs of A Geisha was perceived as a massive romantic epic that would no doubt compete for the highest honors in the film industry.

When Spielberg stepped aside for director Rob Marshall the perception became smaller in scale and the film felt lacking in grandeur and epic scope. This is despite the fact that Mr. Marshall is an Oscar nominated director whose Chicago won Best Picture. Rob Marshall simply isn't Steven Spielberg and because of that the perception of Memoirs of A Geisha is as a film that Steven Spielberg could not find the time to direct. It's a pity because Marshall's Memoirs of A Geisha, while slick and stylized, is also heart-rending and sumptuously beautiful, framed by a lovely and compelling performance by star Ziyi Zhang.

Chiyo (Zhang) was not born to be a geisha. Born in a fishing village in a rickety shack on the edge of a cliff, she was destined to be a wife and mother to a fisherman husband. However, when her mother became ill she and her sister were sold and Chiyo ended up in a geisha house. A spirited child, Chiyo was not willing to simply accept the life of a geisha. It is not until she experiences a rare act of kindness from a stranger known as The Chairman (Ken Watanabe) that the life of a geisha becomes a real possibility. 

One day while Chiyo is crying over the loss of her sister, who was sold into prostitution and soon after disappeared, she meets the Chairman who dries her tears and brings the first smile to her face since the loss of her parents. Seeing the chairman is accompanied by a pair of beautiful geishas, Chiyo decides that she will one day become a geisha so that she may win his heart.

Soon Chiyo has become Sayuri and under the guidance of Mameha (Michelle Yeoh), a legendary geisha, Sayuri becomes the most celebrated geisha in all of Japan. This happens at the expense of  Hatsumomo (Li Gong) who Chiyo had been a servant to throughout her childhood and now had become her chief rival.

Adapted from the best selling novel by Arthur Golden, Memoirs of A Geisha is a story rich in characters and settings. Rob Marshall and writer Robin Swicord craft a loving portrait of the geisha that serves at once to correct misperceptions of the geisha and tell the story of a spirited girl who becomes a fierce, intelligent and beautiful woman.

The key is Zhang Ziyi's performance which fleshes out a character that in the wrong hands could have been carried away by the currents of such a broad character arc that covers more than 30 years of life. Zhang brings a depth of emotion to the character that is more than palpable, it comes off of her in waves. Even as the sociologist in me was questioning the films feminism, I was carried away by Zhang's performance. The performance does not quiet all of my questions of this story's worthiness of being told, but it goes a long way toward making me forgive many of my problems with it.

Here are my issues with the story. Despite the beauty and emotion brought about by Ziyi Zhang's performance I cannot escape the films many anti-feminist underpinnings. Sayuri is never the equal of any man in the film. Everyone from the chairman to his partner to the lecherous American army colonel played by Ted Levine are always seen as superior to Sayuri because she must always do as they say. This is a societal thing, the film is of its time in which women were all considered second class citizens in Japan. 

The problem is that the film offers no critique of this situation, it merely presents it as a framework for the romance between Sayuri and the chairman. A more feminist take would rage against this inequity, in the very least it would offer veiled, sub textual criticisms. But the film remains historically remote in deference to the romance which I'm sure director Rob Marshall and writer Robin Swicord likely felt was what was most important. Therein however, lies another problem for the film. This is not that great of a romance. 

This could be meant as a tragic romance and in a better film that tragedy would be presented and it would be heartbreaking. However, in Arthur Golden's novel and in the film, the choice to be client and geisha is seen as a proper romantic compromise. A loving business arrangement between two friends, not exactly the stuff of romantic legend if you ask me.

I must add one final issue I had with Memoirs of A Geisha. Rob Marshall's choice to shoot the film in English instead of Japanese. This controversial choice was lost in the shuffle early on in the film's life, subsumed by the controversial choice to cast Chinese actresses in Japanese roles. The choice to shoot in English instead of Japanese is an offensive choice creatively because it was not a natural choice or one of necessity but a commercial choice.

Fearing that an audience would not come out for a subtitled film, Marshall and company forced their cast to learn English, thus constricting many of the performances behind thick accents. Then, from time to time, Marshall chooses to lapse into Japanese, such as in the opening scenes which are shot for no particularly good reason in Japanese. Why not just make the whole movie that way? 

Memoirs of a Geisha is set in Japan with Japanese characters, culture and history. It should have been shot in Japanese. That said, as many problems as there are in Memoirs of A Geisha there are plenty of good things. John Williams' score for one, which features the stirring work of both Yitzhak Perelman and Yoyo Ma, is exceptional. This is some of the great composer's best work. It may never be as iconic as his Jaws or Star Wars, but may yet be his best work ever.

The Oscars affirmed that the production design and costumes of Memoirs of A Geisha were its true stars. Colleen Atwood rightfully won an Oscar for her beauty period costumes and John Myhre's set design was also rightly awarded. If the story told in Memoirs of A Geisha were as compelling as the music, sets and costumes, we would be discussing a historic, epic film that would be revered for ages. However, such beauty in service of something so unfocused and lacking, creates a film that will fade from memory far too soon.

Movie Review Melvin Goes to Dinner

Melvin Goes to Dinner (2003) 

Directed by Bob Odenkirk

Written by Michael Blieden 

Starring Michael Blieden, Melora Waters, Stephanie Courtney, Matt Price 

Release Date January 2003 

Published May 19th, 2003 

Bob Odenkirk is best known as half of the comic team behind HBO's cult comedy Mr. Show. With his partner David Cross, Odenkirk created some of the funniest sketch comedies ever on television. Now Odenkirk is venturing out into unknown territory directing his first feature film, and like Mr. Show, it's a risky comic sketch.

Melvin Goes To Dinner is a single, handheld camera following the twists and turns of a conversation between four semi-strangers. Like the classic My Dinner With Andre, Melvin is a fascinating experiment in comic dialogue and the ability of a director to hold your attention without resorting to trickery.

The Melvin of the title is Michael Bleiden, who wrote the script and performed the show as a stage play in Los Angeles. In the film, he and the original stage actors from the LA production, Annabelle Gurwitch as Sarah, Stephanie Courtney as Alex, and Matt Price as Joey, reunite in an LA restaurant. What unfolds is an hour-long conversation that twists from mocking discussions of ghosts in Alex's apartment to intriguing takes on religion, infidelity and strip clubs.

Alex is friends with Joey from business school. She is a man's woman, the type who will join the guys for a trip to the strip club. Joey, who fell into dinner after an accidental phone call, is also old friends with Melvin but they haven't seen much of each other recently. Alex has been friends with Sarah for years and just happened to bump into her on her way to dinner with Joey, forcing her to join them. That explains how everyone got there but there are deeper connections that are revealed during this marathon dinner conversation.

It is so rare to hear great dialogue in the age of Jerry Bruckheimer and Michael Bay. This makes Melvin a welcome change of pace from the majority of modern scripts that merely lend context to action scenes or gross out comedy. Melvin is the extremely rare film that doesn't just feature great dialogue, it is about great dialogue.

This material would be difficult for any director, especially for a first time director, yet Odenkirk manages the material very well. His observational, voyeuristic camera quietly shifts from shot to shot never getting in the way, never tipping off the story’s twists, never leading the audience by using tricks of perspective or showy camera movement.

As I mentioned earlier, the actual conversation is only about an hour long. The remaining 23 minutes of the film is made up of well-done flashbacks. Featured in cameos are Odenkirk cohorts like Jack Black as a mental patient and David Cross as a motivational guru to Odenkirk as one of Sarah's ex-boyfriends, a surprisingly poignant and revealing cameo that helps deepen Sarah's character. Maura Tierney also appears as Melvin's sister, and Melora Waters rounds out the cameos as Melvin's married girlfriend.

The script mines its best material from infidelity. Melvin is dating a married woman and has done it before. Joey is married and admits that he often considers cheating on his wife. Sarah, like Melvin, has been on the cheating side of a relationship while Alex admits to having been the victim of cheating boyfriends on more than one occasion. She claims to have come out unfazed, due to distractions at work.

The stories they relate about their relationships are funny, smart and touching. Not touching in that cloying movie way but in a more real human way that isn't with a major dramatic flourish or revelation but just comes from shared experience. This is a terrific movie, witty and smart with four very likable actors, well-timed cameos and flashbacks and well directed by first time Director Bob Odenkirk. The DVD for Melvin, courtesy of Sundance Home Entertainment, is in the style of Odenkirk's irreverent Mr. Show sense of humor. 

The DVD features two commentary tracks, including a very funny two-man commentary by Bleiden and Odenkirk and one with Odenkirk, Bleiden and Michael Penn who performed the film’s elegant film score. The DVD's best feature is a mock documentary about "The Frank Film Festival", a film festival put on by a guy named Frank in his basement with just one film. It is as much of a must see as the film itself.

Movie Review Melancholia

Melancholia (2011)

Directed by Lars Von Trier 

Written by Lars Von Trier 

Starring Kirsten Dunst, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Alexander Skarsgard, Kiefer Sutherland 

Release Date May 18th, 2011 

Published October 22nd, 2011 

"Melancholia" is a typically divisive film from director Lars Von Trier that will bore and aggravate as many people as it moves and fascinates. You'll find me in the latter category. This moody meditation on life and death, meaning and the lack of meaning, is enthralling in its beauty and heartrending in its sadness.

"Melancholia" is a two part story following the lives of sisters, Justine (Kirsten Dunst) and Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg). We begin with Justine's story. It is Justine's wedding day and she and her new husband, Michael (Alexander Skarsgard, "True Blood") are late to their reception. Justine's sister Claire and her husband John (Kiefer Sutherland) have gone out of their way for this wedding in hope that it will free Justine from a lingering depression. Justine and Claire's parents are certainly no help.

Their father (John Hurt) is a drunkard carrying on with a pair of women half his age. Their mother (Charlotte Rampling) is bitter and not making any attempt to hide her loathing of the institution of marriage.

Lingering over Justine's new marriage is her husband's father, Jack (Stellen Skarsgard), who is also Justine's boss. He wants an ad tagline from her so badly that even on her wedding day he persists with work going as far as hiring a man to follow Justine in hopes she will be inspired. By our account Claire is unusual but she's making an effort. Nevertheless, both Claire and John can sense her beginning to slip back toward despair.

Claire's story picks up sometime after the wedding. A planet called Melancholia is approaching earth and while John predicts it will pass while creating a spectacular show in the sky, Claire is uncertain. Claire is terrified that Melancholia is going to collide and destroy the earth. If you haven't guessed that Melancholia is a metaphor for impending death then you aren't really trying. That's the simple metaphor anyway. I suspect something deeper if I were to probe it further but my mind lingers on death and how it haunts everyday life.

Depressing? Maybe, but I actually find comfort here. I think that I find comfort in the same way Von Trier does, with art. Death has a way of focusing the mind and when focused my mind turns to beauty and art. There is great beauty in "Melancholia." Von Trier along with cinematographer Manuel Albero Claro and art director Simone Grau collaborate to create images of ruin and sadness that are achingly beautiful and likely to win "Melancholia" awards for their stunning beauty.

"Melancholia" won't work for most audiences. The film is meandering and humorless and does not move to the beat of the average mainstream American movie. If you are someone who enjoyed Von Trier's previous work or contains the patience and observation needed for this experience, you will be rewarded. "Melancholia" is a work of art.

For the record; I am aware of what Lars Von Trier said about Adolph Hitler. My review of his film in no way demonstrates that I agree with or even understand what Mr. Von Trier was attempting to say about Hitler.

Movie Review Megamind

Megamind (2010) 

Directed by Tom McGrath

Written by Alan Schoolcraft, Brent Simons

Starring Will Ferrell, Tina Fey, Brad Pitt, Jonah Hill, David Cross

Release Date November 5th, 2010 

Published November 4th, 2010

2010 is the year of the bad guy in animation. In “Despicable Me” a mad genius named Gru, voiced by Steve Carell, became a good guy when he was faced with three lovely little orphans who warmed his villainous heart. Now comes “Megamind,” voiced by Will Ferrell, an evil genius who has grown used to being beaten by his nemesis Metro Man but finds himself unfulfilled once it seems he’s actually won.

Megamind (Ferrell) escaped a dying planet and was sent to earth destined for…. Something, he didn’t catch that part of his parents’ farewell speech. On the way to earth Megamind is bumped off course by another escapee from a dying planet, a handsome, dynamic little boy known as Metro Man (Brad Pitt). Metro Man arrives on earth landing under the Christmas tree of a wealthy family, Megamind crash lands in the yard of a prison where he grows up tutored in the ways of villainy.

Metro Man and Megamind went to school together and while Metro was the big man on campus with his charm, good looks and super powers, Megamind and his big blue head and prison-issue jumpsuit became an outcast. Getting picked last and picked on leads Megamind to embrace his bad guy side and with the help of his childhood companion, Minion (David Cross), Megamind determines to become a Super Villain.

The battles between Metro Man and Megamind, often centering on Megamind’s kidnapping of local reporter Renee Richard (Tina Fey), are epics of destruction that always end the same way with Megamind beaten, captured and imprisoned. However, when Megamind crashes the dedication of the Metro Man museum, takes Renee hostage, and sets up his evil death ray, he actually manages to defeat and seemingly murder Metro Man.

With the city now under his command and no one to stand in his way; Megamind should be ecstatic. Instead, he’s bored. Only Renee gives him a hard time but he doesn’t mind, in fact he discovers that he really likes her and maybe that is why he’s always taken her hostage. They get a chance to explore this when an evil even more destructive than Megamind arrives in Metro City and forces Megamind to go from bad guy to good guy.

There is a heady ideal at the heart of “Megamind.” Can evil exist without good or can good exist without evil? The creators of “Megamind” come down whole-heartedly on the side of both being necessary in order to exist. It’s a big topic for a kiddy flick but not one that “Megamind” lingers on more than it has to.

“Megamind” is first and foremost about jokes and the creators could not have assembled a cast more adept at delivering their punch lines. Will Ferrell has the uncanny ability to project a pratfall with words. His voice characters stumble and bumble in the fashion of his live action characters and that is strong testament to the comic brilliance of Ferrell’s persona and “Megamind” bumbles with the best of them.

Tina Fey’s genius is sarcastic apathy; her voice communicates brilliant comic exhaustion. In one of “Megamind’s” best scenes, Renee Richards boringly recounts the number of times Megamind has kidnapped her and the predictable ways in which he plans to torture and kill her: “Shark tank? Seen it. (Chainsaws) Seen it. (Lasers) Seen it.” Each line delivered with a tart, sarcastic assuredness that drives Megamind nuts.

Brad Pitt, David Cross and Jonah Hill round out the cast of “Megamind” and bring wit, energy and surprising warmth to their highly unusual characters. Pitt’s Metro Man is a rather obvious send up of Superman but you have to love the energetic pandering and insatiable ego that Pitt brings to the character. David Cross is known for being a caustic stage comic but his Minion is a loving companion to Megamind and Cross’s warmth sells Megamind’s change from villain to hero. Jonah Hill meanwhile goes for something close to what Will Ferrell brings to Megamind, a sense of the typical Jonah Hill character we know but with a touch more anger, his Hal the cameraman is funny because Jonah Hill is funny.

There isn’t much to “Megamind” that you haven’t seen before yet it succeeds. This terrific voice cast takes some familiar characters and predictable situations and turns up the charm and energy to keep us interested and laughing; even at jokes we likely could have predicted in the parking lot on the way into the theater. Voice acting is a unique talent and not everyone has it. Will Ferrell, Jonah Hill, Tina Fey, Brad Pitt and David Cross have that talent and “Megamind” is funny because they are funny.

Movie Review Meet the Spartans

Meet the Spartans (2008) 

Directed by Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer

Written by Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer

Starring Sean Maguire, Carmen Electra, Ken Davitan, Kevin Sorbo

Release Date January 25th, 2008

Published January 25th, 2008

Say, did you hear the joke about the movie 300? ? ? That's the joke. I mentioned the movie 300. Why aren't you laughing? I said the name of a movie that you likely saw in the past 2 years. According to the creators of movies like Date Movie, Epic Movie, Meet The Spartans and the upcoming Disaster Movie, merely saying the name of a popular movie and dressing characters to look like people from those movies is the height of satire.

Let's try it again: Stomp The Yard? Are you laughing yet?

Is Meet The Spartans a movie or just a really bad costume party? I guess since they filmed it and edited it, they can call Meet The Spartans a movie but when they call it a comedy, that is where I draw the line. No. To call your movie a comedy, it must elicit laughter and not one singular moment of this alleged spoof elicits even a chuckle. Not a titter or even a modest half smirk. This witless movie karaoke comes from creators who must feel that just mentioning a movie made in the past 2 years is funny. I have an idea, let's try this... Spiderman 3.

Anyone laughing? I said Spiderman 3? Nothing? Not funny? If you don't laugh at my writing the words Spiderman 3 I doubt you will laugh during Meet The Spartans which dresses up like the characters from 300 and then names off a number of other movies expecting us to laugh, I guess, because they mentioned these other movies and maybe offered a minor exaggeration of a scene from that movie. They don't always offer the exaggeration.

Oh, it's not just the witless mentions of other movies that supplies the supposed humor of Meet The Spartans, also add a copious amount of gay jokes, vomit jokes and fart jokes, all just under the wire of the PG 13 rating. Meet The Spartans is the ultimate in teen focus group marketing "Say you know what kids like, let's put all of the movies they saw in the last year in the same movie and then add gay jokes. Brilliant!".

No, not brilliant. Not even remotely clever. Brutal comes to mind. Offensive? Definitely. But not brilliant. Not by a longshot. If last year's Date Movie and Epic Movie were the bottom of the barrel in terms of spoof movies, Meet The Spartans is an example of what happens when someone lifts up the barrel and scrapes out what is underneath into a film can.