Movie Review The Adult Swim Yule Log

The Fireplace (2022) 

Directed by Casper Kelly

Written by Casper Kelly 

Starring Andrea Laing, Justin Miles 

Release Date December 11th, 2022, on Adult Swim, Debut on HBO Max December 12th, 2022 

Published December 12th, 2022 

Cartoon Network's Adult Swim has become a hub of alternative comedy for more than a decade. The Adult Swim brand has brought such weird and ambitious projects as The Greatest Event in Television History, where big stars re-enacted the opening theme songs of 80s TV series, and most famously the viral sensation, Too Many Cooks. That massive hit arrived on Adult Swim seemingly at random late one weekend and by the following day was an internet sensation. 

Now, Adult Swim is set for another viral triumph that seemed to have come out of nowhere. Once again teaming with the man behind Too Many Cooks, writer and director Casper Kelly, Adult Swim debuted their annual Yule Log presentation immediately following the season six finale of the hit cartoon series Rick and Morty. But this was no mere Yule Log. Instead, what starts as a warm and welcoming fire in a lovely fireplace begins to morph into a horror movie. 

After just a few minutes of a typical static shot of Yule Log, a voice can be heard. A cleaning lady has entered the room and her cleaning brings her to walk in front of the Yule Log camera, though she remains mostly out of frame. She's carrying on an animated conversation about her night's work as we remain staring at the fire. Suddenly, as she changes to listening loudly to music on headphones, another figure enters the room, a hulking brute of a man followed by the voice of someone who seems to be this man's mother. 

The hulking brute brutally murders the cleaning lady. We only know this from her screams and the horrific sound design. The camera remains on the fireplace, and it appears the whole movie might stay in this static shot with the sound design and dialogue acting almost like a terrifying radio play. The scene ends with the arrival of a couple who is renting this cottage where the fireplace is located. The murderers quickly retreat, dragging the body of the cleaning lady into a nearby room, just as the couple enters, far too involved in their conversation to see if anything is out of place. Mother was cleaning as her son was committing his heinous murder. 

All of this happens with the camera pointed at the Yule Log. It's accomplished almost completely through sound design and the occasional sight of legs moving past the camera. Director Casper Kelly deftly and ingeniously uses the tools of filmmaking to craft the early horror here and it sets a brilliant tone for the rest of the movie which will capitalize on sound design and camera work throughout to create so much horror fun. 

After the opening sequence we meet our main characters, Andrea Lang and Justin Miles portray a married couple who have rented this cabin for the weekend. The reason the camera has been set up and is capturing the Yule Log is because Justin's job is as a Yule Log YouTuber. He does other stuff as well, but it is a fun reason for him to be capturing the action of the movie. He's filming the Yule Log but also wants film his proposal, he's asking Andrea to marry him. 

They are interrupted by the local sheriff who says there was a murder nearby. Of greater concern to the sheriff, however, is the Yule Log. It seems that Justin took the log from a sacred tree, a former hanging tree, and the tree may be cursed. Where this plot thread goes, I will leave you to discover. Writer-director Casper Kelly makes sure that the Yule Log has a very literal role to play in the brilliantly absurd and often genuinely scary events of this Yule Log presentation. 

Click here for my full length review at Horror.Media

Movie Review Christmas Bloody Christmas

Christmas Bloody Christmas (2022) 

Directed by Joe Begos

Written by Joe Begos 

Starring Riley Dandy, Sam Delich, Abraham Benrubi, Jonah Ray 

Release Date December 9th, 2022 

Published December 12th, 2022 

Christmas horror movies are really having a moment in 2022. Three high profile Christmas themed horror movies have been released to theaters in just the first two weeks of December. One of them is a high profile star affair, Violent Night, while another is an open ripoff of a famed children's franchise, The Mean One. The third Christmas themed horror of December 2022, however is by far the best of the trio. Christmas Bloody Christmas is a wildly over the top, high concept horror movie with high grade gore and sex to spare. 

Riley Dandy stars in Christmas Bloody Christmas as Tori Tooms, the ultimate cool chick. Tori owns a record store, loves heavy metal, and claims she can drink any man under the table. She's a manic pixie dream rock chick. I'm being sarcastic, but only a little. Riley Dandy is soooo good in this movie that she makes this dream girl into an awesome character. Did I absolutely go for this fantasy woman, yes, but only because Riley Dandy commits to the character so very deeply. 

It's Christmas Eve as our story begins and Tori is closing shop for the night on her killer retro record store. She's planning on hooking up with some guy on Tinder until her employee, Robbie (Sam Delich) convinces her to go out drinking with him instead. The banter between Tori and Robbie is charged, flirtatious, combative and quite funny. These two probably should not be hooking up under any circumstances, this would definitely be a mess the next day, but tonight, who knows. 

As the night kicks off, the pair drop by a toy store where two of their friends, a couple, Jay and Lahna (Jonah Ray and Dora Madison), are planning to have sex amid all the trappings of a toy store at Christmas. These many Christmas decorations include large amounts of fake snow, all the colored lights and stockings you would want and one creepy, animatronic Santa Claus. Unfortunately for all of these characters, this Santa does more than just repeat 'Merry Christmas.' 

In a backstory delivered by exposition TV News channel, we learn that these animatronic Santa's that have been delivered to toy stores across the country have been coming to life. It turns out, each was part of a failed experiment to create animatronic soldiers to be sent into violent conflicts. These unstoppable killing machines have, for some reason, been converted into Santa Claus robots and now, for unknown reasons, they've started to come to life and kill. 

That's the premise and from there unfolds a standard slasher film with Santa seeking and destroying anyone who gets his attention. Naturally, this includes our hero, Tori, and Robbie and whether or not they can survive Santa is the crux of the story. Naturally, this will include an inept response from local small town cops and no shortage of failed attempts to kill Santa followed by Santa making an improbable and terrifying comeback. 

Click here for my full length review at Geeks.Media. 

Classic Movie Review I'm No Angel

I'm No Angel (1933) 

Directed by Wesley Ruggles 

Written by Mae West, Harlan Thompson, Lowell Brentano 

Starring Mae West, Cary Grant, Gregory Ratoff 

Release Date October 6th, 1933 

Published December 12th. 2022 

I'm in love. Somehow, I had managed to spend my time as a film critic missing out on the career of Mae West. I was always aware of her, I had seen clips from her films, and I'd heard her famous quotes, but I'd never watched one of her movies until now. The latest presentation of The Film Foundation is Mae West's 1933 romantic comedy, I'm No Angel. One of the earliest films in the career of the legendary Cary Grant, I'm No Angel is a breezy, delightful comedy of music, sex, and unending wit. 

Mae West stars in I'm No Angel as circus performer Tira. Though her act mainly consists of a sexy song and a boyfriend in the crowd lifting wallets, Tira nevertheless is a star. When her boyfriend gets in trouble with the cops, Tira is implicated and is forced to agree to become a lion tamer. She even goes so far as agreeing to put her beautiful head inside a lion's mouth in exchange for the circus manager, Big Bill Barton (Edward Arnold), paying for her lawyer/ 

The lion tamer act is a huge hit and takes her to New York City. There she becomes a sensation and earns the attention of several rich and prominent men. One of those men is Jack Clayton (Cary Grant), who becomes so smitten that it appears they are headed down the aisle. The marriage, however, causes Tira to give up the lion tamer act, angering Big Bill. Big Bill instructs Tira's ex, Slick Wiley (Ralf Harold) to ruin the marriage plan. He succeeds in running off Jack, but that's not the end of the story. 

Rather than go away quietly, Tira instructs her lawyer, Benny Pinkowitz (Gregory Ratoff), to sue Jack for Breach of Promise. This leads to a court scene that is a wonderfully comic set piece. Here West's Tira takes over the cross examination of witnesses questioning her character and typical of her wit, she bowls them over with her charm. As Tira delights the jury, the movie breezes along toward a wonderfully satisfying conclusion. 

I'm no Angel was directed by Wesly Ruggles but much of the movie has been credited to West in the years since. West has a screenwriting credit, alongside two other screenwriters, and it's quite clear that she is in full control of how she's presented. Ruggles may be pointing the camera, but it is West who commands the screen. Her broad accent, her lovely smile, and that unending confidence radiates star power like few actors in movie history. It's clear she's the brains and the beauty behind the whole operation of I'm No Angel. 

I'm No Angel is also notable for being a pre-Hayes Code comedy. This means that West is free to be a fully realized sexual being. While much of the movie is about disproving the number of men she has slept with, that doesn't mean she acts with any shame. Tira's past is her past, she doesn't feel bad at all about her past, nor should she. Society, even today, demands shame of women if they choose to be open and honest about sexual desire, West was and is a rarity in film history, a woman in full control of her sexuality, intelligence, persona, and power. 

Click here for my full-length review 

Movie Review Empire of Light

Empire of Light (2022) 

Directed by Sam Mendes 

Written by Sam Mendes 

Starring Olivia Coleman, Michael Ward, Colin Firth, Toby Jones, Tom Brooke 

Release Date December 9th, 2022 

Empire of Light stars Olivia Coleman as Hilary Small, a cinema employee in a seaside English town. Hilary's life is a drab routine of taking tickets and having sex with her married boss, Mr. Ellis (Colin Firth), though he has no plans to leave his wife. Hilary's life is changed forever with the arrival of a new employee at the cinema. Stephen (Michael Ward) is a handsome young man whom Hilary instantly falls in lust with. However, since he's so young, she assumes he will have more interest in one of her younger co-workers. 

Much to her surprise, Michael takes to Hilary right away. The two have a terrific conversation which lead to Hilary showing Michael her favorite secret spot in the Cinema. The gorgeous art-deco cinema used to have more than 2 screens. A third screening area, which also included a dance floor and lounge, has been left to rot. Hilary likes to go there and smell the sea air from the lounge seats. It's also become a de-facto smoking spot for the employees. 

At first, the banter between Hilary and Stephen is just friendly but it soon takes on a flirtatious air. As their bond deepens via their conversations, Hilary gains the courage to stand up to Mr. Ellis and end their affair. This however, is a tenuous decision as Hilary harbors a dark secret. Mr. Ellis brought Hilary back after she had a mental breakdown a year ago. He's essentially her sponsor, the reason she's able to work and not be in a hospital. 

The burgeoning romance between Hilary and Michael is threatened as Hilary's mental illness returns to the fore and her relationship with Mr. Ellis sours further. Meanwhile, the cinema has earned a remarkable opportunity. The cinema will play host to the premiere of the movie Chariots of Fire, a film that went on to win the Academy Award for Best Picture in 1981. The premiere will be attended by celebrities and politicians and would be a huge boost for business. 

Meanwhile, in the background, racial issues are also coming to the fore. Hilary witnesses Michael being harassed by skinheads, his life threatened. Later, a race riot breaks out and Michael's life is once again placed in peril as is the cinema itself which gets caught up in the brief, violent white nationalist uprising. It seems that even society itself is conspiring to keep Michael and Hilary from being together. The dramatic crux then of Empire of Light is whether or not the central couple can overcome the personal and societal roadblocks in front of their unlikely romance. 

Olivia Coleman is a radiant actress of limitless talent. That said, the part of Hilary is a tad broad and leans into an actors worst instincts. Director Alan Ball allows a little too much room for Hilary's mental illness to be played broadly. A scene where Hilary has fully reached the end of her rope goes off the rails and Coleman's hysterics in the scene don't feel legitimate, they play like someone's broad idea of a mental breakdown. 

Hilary's mental illness and the raging racial tensions that also play throughout Empire of Light don't work well together. They feel like two different movies grated together. Then there is an overarching notion of the magic of the movies which has promise but never really gains momentum. A big part of the movie unfolds when Hilary actually takes the opportunity to watch a movie and has a very special experience. This feels completely apart from the rest of the movie as well. The choice of movie is perhaps meaningful, but the idea is underdeveloped. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media. 

Movie Review Living

Living (2022) 

Directed by Oliver Hermanus 

Written by Kazuo Ishiguro 

Starring Bill Nighy, Aimee Lou Wood, Alex Sharp, Tom Burke 

Release Date December 25th, 2022 

Published December 9th, 2022 

Living stars Bill Nighy as Mr. Williams. His name is kept very formal as a reflection of how he's lived his entire life by the standards of formality. Mr. Williams is the head of a non-descript Public Works office in a big English city, never identified. He's known among his employees as a quiet yet authoritative man. He manages the office efficiently, never makes waves and just tries to keep his part of this bureaucracy from gaining any kind of attention. 

Mr. Williams' arrival at work everyday is like clockwork, as is his end of the day routine. He rides the train to and from work but stays apart from his employees so as to maintain his authority. He appears to have done this job all his life without ever making much of any impact. Stacks of papers top every desk, each a request that Public Works kicks from one part of bureaucracy to another, as if their product were making sure nothing ever changes. 

Naturally, the life of Mr. Williams is about to change drastically. In an uncharacteristic moment, Mr. Williams rises from his desk one day and announces that he will be leaving early. We will come to find out that this is do to a doctor's appointment. At this appointment, Mr. Williams is told that he has maybe six months to live. The following day, Mr. Williams' clockwork arrival at work doesn't happen. He tells no one and simply doesn't show up. 

Instead, Mr. Williams has removed his life savings from his bank and has traveled to a seaside location in order to find someone who can teach him how to live. Encountering a drifter cum author, Mr. Sutherland (Tom Burke), Mr. Williams tries out a night of debauched partying and what happens from there will reveal a great deal about both Mr. Williams and Mr. Sutherland. This sequence is lovely and sad and brilliantly revealing. It's a bravura sequence in a terrific movie. 

Two more characters exist in this story and their story underlines the story of Mr. Williams. Alex Sharp plays Mr. Wakeling, a new man in Mr. Williams' department.  The name ,Mr. Wakeling, it's as if his name is intended to demonstrate that he lingers in the wake of others, carried along by the tide. Not a bad metaphor for a for a young man at the start of a new and confusing journey. Sharp gives Mr. Wakeling a wide-eyed eagerness that soon mellows into a healthy competence at his job and a general good nature. 

Mr. Wakeling stands out as he is immediately taken with a fellow co-worker, Miss Harris (Aimee Lou Wood). Miss Harris has also caught Mr. Williams' eye though it's not a creepy infatuation. Mr. Williams admires the life he's witnessed from Miss Harris, her positive attitude and warmth. She makes the office a little brighter and in her he sees someone else who might be able to help teach him what it is like to be alive after having spent so many years merely functioning. 

That's the magic of Living. Bill Nighy's performance is about learning to live and choosing the people who can guide you on that journey. It's a somber reminder of the ways you make an impression on people whether you are aware of it or not. Miss Harris made the world a little brighter without knowing she did it and, even from his cloistered space a functioning cog in a bureaucratic wheel, Mr. Williams noticed it, admired it, and comes to praise it with hopes of learning more from it. 

That's a beautiful idea and it is well explored in the patient and thoughtful direction of Oliver Hermanus and the insightful script of Kazuo Ishiguro. Hermanus adopts a look for Living early on that evokes 1950s Hollywood, and the work of director Nicholas Ray, that incredibly humanistic director, brilliantly known for his interior dramas. Like Ray, Hermanus uses interiors to reveal his characters. For instance, Mr. Williams' well dressed and mannered persona juxtaposed against the rowdy, grimy, seaside pubs, home to the debauched and delightful, Mr. Sutherland's of the world. 

Click here for my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review The Mean One

The Mean One (2022) 

Directed by Steven LaMorte

Written by Steven LaMorte, Flip Kobler 

Starring Krystle Martin, David Howard Thornton, Chase Mullins 

Release Date December 9th, 2022 

Published December 8th, 2022 

The Mean One is a fully unauthorized horror parody of The Grinch that skirts the law by never actually saying the word 'Grinch.' How willing you are to accept this is a strong measure of how you will take this movie. The film takes the concept of How the Grinch Stole Christmas and turns The Grinch into a monster who accidentally murder's Cindy Lou's mom while he steals Christmas. Thus a begins a long term effort to destroy Christmas by killing anyone who exhibits even the faintest form of Christmas cheer. 

The Mean One, aka The Grinch, is played by Terrifier 2 star David Howard Thornton who essays yet another brilliantly physical and silent performance. He's a truly incredible physical performer, even as much of his performance in this very silly film is a parody of Jim Carrey's 2000's live action Grinch, crossed with a little bit of Art the Clown. It's mimicry but, at times, it's quite darkly funny mimicry. Thornton is the best thing about this very silly, extremely low budget horror flick. 

As mentioned, The Mean One proceeds from an accidental murder. Cindy Lou, played as an adult Krystle Martin, interrupts The Grinch as he is stealing Christmas. Her mother enters the scene to protect her daughter and accidentally dies. Years later, The Grinch has been stealing Christmas from this small town, and killing to do so, while Cindy and her father fled the town. Returning years later to sell their home, they find a town that has banned Christmas and harbors The Grinch as a deep dark secret. 

Find my full length review at Horror.Media 

Movie Review The Whale

The Whale (2022) 

Directed by Darren Aronofsky 

Written by Samuel D. Hunter 

Starring Brendan Fraser, Hong Chau, Sadie Sink, Samantha Morton 

Release Date December 9th, 2022 

Published December 7th, 2022 

One of the biggest anxieties in my life is having food on my face. It's a fear of humiliation, I get triggered by being embarrassed. Logically, intellectually, I know this is not something worthy of serious concern and that it is an unavoidable fact of life, food on your face is normal, wipe it off and move on. But, my brain won't let it be that simple. Thinking of this aspect of my anxiety has me triggered. My eyes are welling up and I can sense that if I linger further in this space, I will become quite inconsolable. 

I've rarely seen this type of emotional reaction, this type of triggered anxiety in a movie. It's quite difficult to capture this kind of internalized emotional struggle, the rigorous internal battle to stop yourself from crying over something not worthy of crying about. The Whale comes the closest I have seen in some time of seeing this kind of emotional turmoil, a roiling mass of embarrassment and shame, on screen. Brendan Fraser's Charlie captures this feeling in all of its internalized horror. If only the rest of the movie were capable of capturing anything remotely as genuine. 

Charlie is a dangerously obese man who gets by as a literature professor at an online college. The shame over his weight causes him to conduct his classes with his camera on, using only his voice to instruct his class. Charlie's only friend is his caregiver, Liz (Hong Chau). They were friends before she became his caregiver. In fact, Liz is intrinsically linked to Charlie's past. She was connected to Charlie's late boyfriend, a man whose death changed both of their lives. 

Throughout The Whale we will slowly unpack Charlie's backstory as a man who was once married and had a daughter, Ellie (Sadie Sink), who he would like to reconnect with. Charlie was pushed out of Ellie's life after he fell in love with one of his male students and embarked on a new life with this man. Ellie doesn't know that Charlie had wanted to be in her life but wasn't allowed to be. She only knows that he appeared to choose being with this man over being her dad and she harbors a deep, and justifiable resentment. 

Much of the plot of The Whale centers on Charlie trying to reconnect with Ellie before his weight problem, and his unwillingness to get help for it at a hospital, takes his life. Ellie, however, proves to be far more difficult to reconnect with than he imagined. Ellie's bitterness has hardened into an almost sociopathic cruelty. Despite Charlie's attempts at dressing up her cruelty as a kind of blunt curiosity, Ellie is rarely anything less than bitter to a toxic degree. 

This toxicity is explored in her relationship to a strange young man named Thomas (Ty Simpkins), who is insinuating himself into Charlie's life. Thomas claims to be a missionary from an extreme offshoot of Mormonism called New Life. He goes door to door with literature and, after meeting Charlie, and seeming to save his life, Thomas makes it his mission to save Charlie's soul before his weight kills him. Thomas is harboring a deep, dark secret that Ellie will spend some time drawing out of him. 

This is the portion of The Whale that is the most poorly developed. The idea appears to be to establish Ellie's empathy and care, qualities that she has worked hard to hide. How they choose to portray this is strange, misguided, and simply doesn't track with what we see on screen. In fact, it takes a late monologue from Charlie to explain that what Ellie did was kind and helpful. Realistically, it appeared she was trying once again to do something cruel, and it happened to turn out well. 

Find my full-length review at Geeks.Media.