Movie Review Miller's Girl

Miller's Girl (2024) 

Directed by Jade Halley Bartlett 

Written by Jade Halley Bartlett 

Starring Jenna Ortega, Martin Freeman, Dagmara Dominiczyk 

Release Date January 26th, 2024 

Published January 25th, 2024 

Ewwwww! The ick is a big feeling throughout the new melodrama, Miller's Girl, an erudite and empty exploration of sexual desire between a teacher and a student. Starring It-Girl Jenna Ortega, Miller's Girl is a double entendre. The title refers to both author Henry Miller and his endlessly horny catalog of books and the character played by Martin Freeman, a teacher named Jonathan Miller who is drawn to his student, played by Ortega. It's not a particularly clever double meaning but it's a good try. A lot of filmmakers don't even bother making their title matter to their movie, so, there's that. 

Jenna Ortega stars in Miller's Girl as Cairo Sweet, a wise beyond her years High Schooler. Jaded and bored by her Tennessee hometown, and her absent parents, Cairo spends her time reading and developing her skills as a writer. Her hard work pays off when she shows her writing to her new Literature teacher, Mr. Miller (Freeman). Miller is immediately taken with Cairo's writing. That said, he's also impressed with her personal reading which happens to include his only published book. If you are thinking that he's being set up, stop reading ahead! 

At home, Mr. Miller is struggling as a writer and a husband. His marriage to Beatrice, a far more successful and prolific author than her husband, is on the rocks. Desperately horny, Mr. Miller can't seem to get his wife away from her publisher long enough for a makeout session and a handjob, let alone the kind of passionate lovemaking that defined the early years of their marriage. Thus, Mr. Miller is ripe for a young woman who reads Henry Miller and proves capable of writing with just as much flushed, engorged, and filthy prose as Henry Miller himself. 

Click here for my review 

Horror in the 90s Body Parts

Body Parts (1991) 

Directed by Eric Red 

Written by Eric Red, Norman Snider 

Starring Jeff Fahey, Brad Dourif, Kim Delaney, Lindsay Duncan 

Release Date August 2nd, 1991 

Box Office $9.2 million

Body Parts stars Jeff Fahey, a golden boy of the low budget horror set in the 1990s, as a doctor trying to prove that death row inmates were capable of being reformed. Our protagonists ideals are put to the test after a car accident takes his arm and an experimental surgery grafts the arm of a former serial murderer onto the good doctor's body. The arm remains psychically linked to the supposedly dead murderer and begins to turn against its new host. That's the high concept premise of Body Parts and there really isn't much to it beyond that premise. 

The disparate parts of the serial killer's body, his arms and legs, even his head, try to reassemble themselves. All the while, Fahey's doctor knows what is happening and is trying to stop the body parts from killing their new hosts, including an artist played by Brad Dourif who has become wildly more prolific and creative with his new arm and an average joe who got both of the killer's legs and can now play basketball for the first time. Both men are set to lose their new body parts unless our hero doctor can warn them about what is happening. 

And that's the plot of Body Parts. There really isn't much to say about the plot. It's bizarre but presented in a fashion that mutes how bizarre it is. Director Eric Red doesn't treat this kind of science fiction notion of transplant surgery with any kind of special quality. He makes it seem downright mundane aside from the body horror surgical scars applied to the amputee arm. They went all out making the arm look grotesque for the few scenes we are able to see it. Beyond that however, Body Parts is desperately mediocre effort from a director who only kind of seems as if he knows what he's doing. 

I will give you a for instance. Red directs a scene early in Body Parts where he wants to underline how normal and suburban the doctor is. So, he has the doctor enjoy a family breakfast with his wife and two kids and makes a big show of moving his camera through the halls of the house to the front door where the wife and children follow dad so they can send him off with a hug and kiss. It's all needless underlining of the point: he's a normal suburban dad. Except, it's not normal. Real families don't do this and if you saw this in real life you might suspect some kind of cult behavior occurring. 

Find my full length review at Horror.Media 

Movie Review Godzilla X Kong: The New Empire

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024) 

Directed by Adam Wingard 

Written by Terry Rossio, Simon Barrett, Jeremy Slater 

Starring Rebecca Hall, Bryan Tyree Henry, Dan Stevens Kaylee Hottle 

Release Date March 29th, 2024 

Published April 2nd, 2024 

My apathy towards Godzilla x Kong The New Empire knows no bounds. I saw the film a little before the release and was so unmoved by the movie that I forgot to write a review of it prior to the release. It's such a nonexistent movie for me that I have had to read through the Wiki description of the plot, more than once, to recall the plot of the movie. It's so boringly slick and stupidly loud that the only lasting impact Godzilla x Kong The New Empire had on me was a slight damage to my hearing in my right ear, I think I was too close to the speakers on the right side. 

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire takes Godzilla and King Kong and makes them partners. It's a team up movie in the monster-verse. You can hear the marketing buzzwords bouncing off the walls. King Kong is struggling to adjust to life in Middle Earth, sorry, The Hollow Earth, the inside of the Earth where he hopes to find more giant apes like himself. Thus far, he's made no progress and has spent his time in pain from a toothache. Indeed, the opening act of Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire spends most of its time dealing with Kong's bad tooth. 

Rebecca Hall, gritting her teeth while picking up a big budget paycheck, returns to the franchise as Dr. Ilene Andrews, Monarch Corporation's leading expert on King Kong. It was Dr. Andrews who helped discover the hollow earth and helped get Kong there and away from Godzilla who remains on the surface of the Earth, protecting it by destroying large swaths of it when fighting other 'titans' for dominance. In a moment the movie sure thinks is cute, Godzilla uses the Colisseum in Rome as a Godzilla sized doggy bed. 

The plot kicks in when Godzilla becomes agitated by a signal coming from the hollow Earth. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Classic Movie Review The Paper

The Paper (1994) 

Directed by Ron Howard 

Written by David Koepp, Steven Koepp

Starring Michael Keaton, Marisa Tomei, Randy Quaid, Glen Close, Robert Duvall

Release Date March 18th, 1994 

Published 

The Paper stars Michael Keaton as Henry Hackett, Metro Editor for a New York City tabloid perpetually on the brink of closing. With a baby on the way, with his reporter wife, Martha (Marisa Tomei), Henry is plotting an exit from the paper. On this day, as we join the story, Henry has an interview with a Wall Street Journal style, internationally respected newspaper. Henry doesn't want the job. He wants the money but he'd much rather stay at his current employer where he can get his hands dirty. Instead of being behind a desk with a fat paycheck, Henry needs the excitement of the metro page. 

Making Henry's choice to stay or go at his current gig difficult is his rival, Alicia (Glenn Close). Alicia is a former reporter and editor who is now a bean counter. She makes big decisions based on budgets instead of journalism and Henry resents her for switching sides. Henry doesn't want to end up working under Alicia and her penny pinching, thus another reason he's considering leaving. Holding him in place is his current boss, Bernie (Robert Duvall), a legendary editor and the final word at the paper. As long as Bernie is there, Alicia is mostly neutralized. But how much longer does Bernie have? 

These questions roil beneath the surface creating tension while the bigger story begins to unfold. The paper has missed a big story. Last night, a pair of businessmen were gunned down and every other newspaper in town ran with the story. The paper is playing catch up and Henry is determined not to get scooped for a second day in a row. He wants to know the moment an arrest is made so they can get the picture and the story on the front page that night. But first, what if the story is wrong? What if the eventual arrest of two black teenagers for the crime is wrong? 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Movie Review Monkey Man

Monkey Man (2024) 

Directed by Dev Patel 

Written by Dev Patel, Paul Angunawela 

Starring Dev Patel, Pitobash, Sharlto Copley, Vipin Sharma 

Release Date April 5th, 2024 

Published April 8th, 2024 

Monkey Man is bathed in cool. Dev Patel's directorial palette is blood red, it's sweat soaked and bruised. It's Dev Patel's first time behind the camera and he directs the confidence of someone who has done this all of his life. It's beyond impressive, it's epic. This guy just gets it, camera placement, pacing, his use of color and music. But he also gets the emotion of cinema. Weaving a story about a boy losing his mother through his blood-soaked and battered action flick. Monkey Man is a punk rock action flick with a Bollywood soul, and a genuine, big beating heart. 

Monkey Man stars Dev Patel Kid, sometimes Bobby, and always Monkey Man. As a boy, Kid grew up in a lush, green forest. He spent days chasing his mother around the surrounding hills, falling asleep in her arms at night as she weaved epic tales of a Hanuman, the devoted warrior companion of Rama. In these incredible stories, the heroics of Hamuman resonate in the young Kid's mind, how Hanuman, the Monkey Man, led glorious victories on behalf of Rama. These stories are the foundation of Kid's moral core, one that will be tested and forged in fire, blood, and broken bones. 

The story of Haniman is inspiring, but the story of the Kid, will not be inspiring. It begins with our Monkey Man in a fight pit giving up his blood and teeth for a few bucks. This underground fight club, overseen by Tiger (Sharlto Copley), affords Kid the chance to lose but earn a few extra bucks from helping to fix the fight in favor of Tiger's chosen champion. Those extra bucks aren't enough to lift Kid out of poverty. But this is poverty with purpose. Kid, is saving his pennies for the chance at vengeance. He's using what little money he earns to build toward his roaring rampage of revenge. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media 

Horror in the 90s: Leprechaun 2

Leprechaun 2 (1994) 

Directed by Rodman Flender

Written by Turi Meyer, Al Septien

Starring Warwick Davis, Tony Cox, Charlie Heath, Shevonne Durkin, Sandy Baron 

Release Date April 8th, 1994 

Box Office $2.3 Million 

It's an almost universal truth, if the story behind the scenes of your movie is more interesting than your movie, the movie generally stinks. This isn't always true, Titanic has a more interesting behind the scenes journey but Titanic is still quite a good movie. But, as a general rule, my point stands. Leprechaun 2 is a solid proof of concept for my thesis. The story behind Leprechaun 2 is far more interesting than this bland, boring, and unfunny comic horror movie. The first Leprechaun movie wasn't exactly a great movie either but the sequel is quite, quite bad. 

The story goes that no one behind the 1993 movie Leprechaun believed that the film would be a hit. Then, the film made 8 times its miniscule budget back in theatric grosses and became a home video monster, hitting the VHS market and becoming cash machine. So, of course, marketers with dollar signs dancing in their heads needed a sequel and immediately approached director Mark Jones and star Jennifer Aniston for a sequel. And, they both said no. Now, Jones wasn't a hard no, he was just busy making another horror movie called Rumpelstiltskin, a horror movie we all remember and revere today, I'm sure. 

Jennifer Aniston meanwhile is reported to have laughed so hard at the idea of leaving Friends for a sequel to Leprechaun that her guffaw could be heard across the galaxy. Friends wasn't yet the global phenomenon that it would become, but it was more than enough of a good reason for Aniston to blow off the makers of Leprechaun 2 in no uncertain terms. And so it was, without the man who wrote and directed the hit original and no Jennifer Aniston, the makers of Leprechaun 2 had only their Leprechaun, Warwick Davis, and nothing else in place. 

Find my full length review at Horror.Media 

Movie Review The Listener

The Listener (2024) 

Directed by Steve Buscemi 

Written by Alessandro Camon 

Starring Tessa Thompson, Rebecca Hall 

Release Date March 29th, 2024

Published March 26th, 2024

The Listener stars Tessa Thompson as the employee of a suicide hotline. A former drug addict, a few years removed from a prison sentence 'Beth,' as she calls herself on the calls she takes, uses her personal experience to relate to the numerous people who call her for a listening ear. Beth works the overnight shift, the busiest time of the day for potential suicides. The calls she takes take a toll on her, but she stays at it because she knows what it is like to be at the lowest of lows. 

Find my full length review at Geeks.Media