Movie Review: Rabbit Hole

Rabbit Hole (2010)

Directed by John Cameron Mitchell 

Written by David Lindsay Abaire 

Starring Nicole Kidman, Aaron Eckhardt, Dianne Wiest, Sandra Oh, Miles Teller

Release Date December 17th, 2010 

Published December 16th, 2010 

Grief is an individual thing, no two people, no matter how connected they are, react the same way to a catastrophic loss. Some will talk about the Kubler-Ross Theory, the five stages of grief, but Kubler-Ross is far too simple. No two people experience grief in the same way, attempting to simplify people’s reactions to trauma is a fool’s errand. 

The movie “Rabbit Hole” explores the different ways people experience grief, that individual experience, and how people recover or not from the most devastating of losses. Based on a play by David Lindsey-Abaire, who adapted his own script for this screenplay, and directed by John Cameron Mitchell, “Rabbit Hole” is a deeply humane drama filled with anguish and heartache but also with a longing hopefulness at its core.

Nicole Kidman stars in “Rabbit Hole” as Becca a stay at home mom whose 4 year old son Danny chased his dog into the street one day and was struck and killed by a car. 8 months later Becca and her husband, Howie (Aaron Eckhardt), are struggling with the different ways each is dealing with the loss of their son.

For Becca, comfort cannot be found in a grief counseling group where, in one of the films most remarkable scenes, Kidman says what is on the minds of so many of us though most would not have the nerve or seeming lack of compassion to say it. She does find something soothing in removing memories of David from she and Howie’s home beginning with the family dog that was the reason Danny ran into the street, and continuing with the removal of David's clothes, his pictures on the refrigerator and eventually a suggestion to sell their lovely suburban house.

Howie on the other hand does find comfort in the grief group and in the friendship of a veteran group member Gabby (Sandra Oh). Will this friendship offer him the comfort that Becca cannot? Meanwhile, Becca finds a much unexpected comfort visiting with the teenage driver of the vehicle that killed her son. Miles Teller plays Jason a mild, artistic, thoughtful kid who bears physical and emotional scars from the accident and despite the circumstances elicits deep sympathy from Becca.

Becca's relationship with Jason and Howie's friendship with Gabby are on an emotional collision course that unfolds in unexpected ways in the final act of “Rabbit Hole.” Director James Cameron Mitchell is best remembered for his outlandish musical “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” and his lesser known oddity “Shortbus” which earned an NC-17 for its explicit sex. In “Rabbit Hole” Mitchell subverts expectations by playing it straight, delivering in essence a highly conventional drama.

The distinct lack of oddity in “Rabbit Hole” stands out only for those unfamiliar with Mitchell's work. For the uninitiated, this stock approach to dramatic storytelling won't register in the same way. Both camps should find “Rabbit Hole” moving but only those who know Mitchell's work will be struck by the lack of playfulness, the standard approach and unfortunate lack of surprises.

Putting my expectations aside for a moment, “Rabbit Hole” contains scenes of heart-rending sadness and deeply moving emotion. A scene involving a video on Howie's phone that he believes Becca intentionally deleted is a powerful, gutty moment, exceptionally well played by Eckhardt and Kidman. The scene in which Howie discovers Becca's friendship with Jason is another agonizing scene filled with deep, passionate feeling.

I may have expected something else from director John Cameron Mitchell but what he delivers is quite strong even in its distinct lack of jaw dropping moments of surprise, the hallmarks of each of Mitchell’s previous films. “Rabbit Hole” has a strong sense of how individual the experience of grief is and it effectively shows the way two people as close as they could possibly be; experience the same trauma in different ways.

A strong cast that also includes Oscar winner Dianne Wiest as Kidman’s mother, playing her own grief storyline, and Tony Award winner Tammy Blanchard as Kidman’s newly pregnant sister, tackle a tough, perfervid story filled with inherent sadness and give it an uplifting and enlightening feel without losing that sadness that will never lift no matter how much time passes and healing takes place.

Resilience is at the heart of recovering from trauma and like grief, resilience is an individual endeavor. Some people will seem to bounce right back as if pretending nothing happened. Others will be consumed by grief and never emerge from the darkness. Only you know how you resilient you will be and likely not until you are forced to confront serious trauma.

The strength of “Rabbit Hole” is in knowing this, playing to it and delivering a drama filled with the understanding necessary to create resilience between the two devastated souls at its center. There are no simple answers for understanding grief and in that way “Rabbit Hole” is instructive and wonderfully understanding. Like the most resonant of dramas “Rabbit Hole” is going to help some who see it and likely move all who see it.